The Worst Of You
by Atrophy-Conception
Summary: A villainess goes to Gru with a plan that will get them both the respect they deserve. However in order to pull it off Gru must hire someone to watch his kids, a task which proves difficult, particularly when the girl he hires starts getting in the way.
1. Trouble At The Bank Of Evil

Author's Note: Okay, because I can't obviously say that much in the summary I just wanted to mention a few things here. This story is going to revolve heavily around Gru's relationship with the girls but it's also a GruXOC fic. The reason being that I am slightly crazy. As far as my romance fics go, I tend to take my time, particularly when they involve characters that are unlikely to get together, that way things seem more natural. Having said that I also want this fic to be kind of light and fun and I want to keep most of the angst and fluff out. (Not to say that there won't be a little of both…probably more so with fluff…angst I can do without)

I really shouldn't even be writing it because I actually meant for this summer to be about finishing some of my older fics, so I can go into this school year focusing on graduating from college but what can I say for some reason this movie kind of got under my skin. Also, I might add that this is the most fun I've had writing in ages. Seriously, I cannot remember the last time a fic was this much fun for me. I finished this chapter in one day…I haven't done that in years.

Anyways, I hope it turned out all right and forgive me if I am being nonsensical, it's 2 am and I'm very tired.

Chapter One:

Trouble At The Bank Of Evil

Mr. Perkins had been drinking coffee when the tall woman in black entered his office unannounced. He reached automatically for the button that would call security, and barely managed to pull his hand away when a massive man, presumably her bodyguard smashed the button under a fist the size of a ham. Despite his bewildered frustration, he had to admire the finesse with which the woman made her entrance.

As the hulking man returned to her side, she pulled out a cigarette and stuck it in a shiny black holder which she placed delicately in her dark painted lips. The brute lit it for her without a word.

"Mr. Perkins, I presume." She said after taking a few puffs. She had a heavy French accent. It rolled off of her tongue like honey.

"What is the meaning of this?" Mr. Perkins finally said, after his initial bewilderment subsided. He squared his massive shoulder in indignation. "You can't just come in unannounced. This is the Bank Of Evil. There's a certain level of sophistication were trying to uphold for gods sake and regulation says that all evil goons stay outside." He added while pointing toward the heavy man who was regarding him from behind a pair of tiny sunglasses which did nothing for him but make his forehead look unnaturally bulbous.

"And how often do your villains follow regoolation?" She asked. "Besides, he ez not evil, he ez disgruntled. You would be too if you 'ad no tongue." With that she sat down in the seat across from his desk, careful to brush her fur coat out from beneath her so that she would not sit on it. It looked as if it were made from a variety of different animals.

"Your secretary would not let me in. She said that you do not offer loans to ze Villainess. It turns no profit apparently." She said, her words laced with scorn.

Mr. Perkins frowned and eyed the smashed remnants of the button again wearily before putting his hands on his desk and eyeing the woman. He decided that perhaps the quickest way to get rid of her in the circumstances was to play the snooty banker, rather then the thug, since her thug could probably out thug him.

"Well…in the past, it's true we've had very little success in backing female villains, but at the moment we're experiencing some cash problems…due to a recent failure so we're not offering loans to anyone." He said heavily.

"Yes, I 'eard about it. I do hope your son 'as returned safely." She said while holding her cigarette out. Mr. Perkins watched as a bit of ash fell on his incredibly expensive carpeting. "A great many people 'ad high hopes for him. That pyramid heist was very impressive…alzo I hope I am not presumptuous in assuming he 'ad some help." Mr. Perkins inhaled, expanding his already massive chest.

"I am an exceptionally busy man, madam. I don't have time to shoot the breeze with aspiring villains." She continued to watch him, the smallest hint of a smile on her lips.

"How rude of me." She said after a moment. "I 'aven't introduced myself. I am Polina de Molyneux and a loan; Mr Perkins ez not the reason I am here. You see, I am already quite capable of funding my own exploits and I am not an aspiring villain. In fact, soon, I will be ze most powerful woman in ze world." Mr. Perkins continued to listen to her with indifference.

"Is that so. Well then why is it that I've never heard of you?"

"I work under ze radar." She said as she put her cigarette out in Mr. Perkins ashtray. "But you can be certain zat by this time next year, everyone will know who I am."

"If you don't want a loan, then what do you want?" He asked, annoyed.

"For many months now I 'ave been gazzering information on villains. You see I am more of a, how you say, visionary. I have a lot of money and many recruits, but I need to find someone who can bring my ideas to fruition. Originally, when I 'eard your son had stolen ze pyramid, it caught my interest, but you'll forgive me for saying, further research left me quite unimpressed." She said, some of the longer words almost seemed to dance on her lips. However, as beguiling as her accent was, it was lost on Perkins.

"Now you see here…" He started, his face turning red. Polina's bodyguard stepped forward and slammed his fist down on Mr. Perkins desk before he could say anything more. There was a brief splintering noise from somewhere in the woodwork.

"Settle down, Doug." She said absently. "Please do not interrupt me. It ez very annoying." She added. "I was merely saying that as experienced as your son is with technology he seems little more then a rich boy playing with toys. His creations are laughable and he has no track record outside of ze pyramid."

"If that's the case, then what do you want from me." Perkins said through clenched teeth.

"I was coming to that. I eliminated many names on ze list. Now I am down to one, but he 'as done nothing in years, so I have 'ad a very hard time tracking him down. However I did find somesing saying that he applied for a loan here three years ago and so I figured you had his information."

"We don't give out villain information." He said while eyeing Doug crossly.

"You were under the assumption zat I was asking?" Mr. Perkins chuckled a little.

"Now, don't take me for a fool. If you did something to me you'd never walk out of here alive." She eyed him for a moment.

"Doug." She said, still eyeing Perkins. The giant stepped forward and reached into his coat. Mr. Perkins hands tightened on the arm rests of his chair, but when the monster removed his hand he was not holding a weapon, as Perkins had expected, but a stack of papers. They were flung in front of him. He turned them around so he could read them.

"What's this? Bank information? Why are you showing me this?"

"Ze majority stock holder of zis bank was a man named Richard Landry." She allowed a moment for these words to sink in.

"Was?" Polina smiled.

"It is called ze past tense." She said. "I believe he was your partner? He was kind enough to sign ze papers over to me." Mr. Perkins eyed the documents wearily.

"So I see…"

"Now, if you are ready to cooperate. I need all of your records on a villain called Gru."

XXX

Gru sighed heavily and eyed his watch with impatience. He'd been standing at the desk at the DMV for nearly twenty minutes while an exceptionally lethargic middle-aged man searched through a mass of files in the computer database with agonizing slowness. He wondered vaguely who had come up with the DMV. Whoever it was must have been truly evil. He might've appreciated such wickedness if he didn't have to deal with it personally.

"Oh, okay here you are." The man said, straightening a little. His eyes skimmed down the screen and his smile faded a little. "According to our files it's been a while since you renewed your license…or the plates on your…wait…tank?" Gru cleared his throat.

"Yah, well, you know how theengs get, you get beesy, you forget to do theengs…"

"It's been fifteen years, Mr. Gru. Did you drive here?" The man asked, his hand hovering over a phone used to presumably connect to other employees and more cumbersomely security guards. Gru frowned and leaned forward on the man's desk. The man, in accordance with his instincts of self-preservation, leaned back.

"Let us assume for a moment dat I 'ave better places to be and dat preventing me from being at those places would be de worst decision ove your life." The man swallowed and after a moment of enduring the intensity of Gru's scowl, he moved his hand from the phone back to the computer. He didn't get payed nearly enough to deal with something like Gru. He pressed down on one of the keys, his eyes never leaving Gru's. One of the printers whirred to life. The man grabbed the sheet and handed it to the villain shakily.

"U-um, please check to make sure the information is right, then, I-if you'll step to the side we'll take you're picture for your new license." Gru smiled a little.

Five minutes later he was outside of the DMV whistling happily. He stuffed his new license in his coat and unlocked the tank. Before starting it up his phone rang. Gru pulled it out and eyed the number briefly before flipping it open.

"What ees eet doctor?" He said as he turned the key and the tank roared to life.

"You said you'd be gone twenty minutes Gru." The doctor replied, sounding a bit hassled. "You've been gone an hour now, ow stop that! I told you to leave that alone!"

"Well, eet took longer den I expected. What ees going on?"

"I am not a babysitter Gru! I can accept that these girls are going to be living here and I will even consent to them being around while we work, but I have to draw the line at this! Hey! That's my leg! That-" There was a brief crashing noise. Gru raised his eyebrows.

"Dr. Nefario?" Gru asked, while listening to a variety of worrying sounds coming from the other side. After a moment the phone clicked as someone picked it up.

"Hiee daddy." Gru pulled the receiver away from his ear a little, wincing slightly.

"Hello, Agnes. Where ees Dr. Nefario?"

"He's taking a nap ona floor." Agnes said happily. Gru frowned.

"Give de phone to one ove your sisters, Agnes." He said, while only half paying attention to the road. He ran a red light, causing a car to veer off and crash into a pole. He heard Margo's voice coming faintly from the other side.

"Give me that, Agnes." She said before her voice came through the receiver. "Hey, it's all right, Edith just stole Uncle Nefario's scooter. And then Adnes accidentally tripped him when she went running after Kyle."

"He ees still breathing?"

"Yeah. He keeps saying 'why' over and over again."

"Okay, well dats fine then. I am going to stop at de store on my way home. What do you gurls want for deener?"

"Hold on." He heard Margo relay the question to her sisters and then their faint but enthusiastic answers.

"Edith wants sloppy joes. Agnes wants macaroni and cheese."

"And, what do you want, Margo?"

"I'm fine with either." She said.

"In dat case we will have both. I will see you gurls soon."

"Bye dad." Margo said after a hint of hesitation. Gru smiled a little as he turned off the phone. It had been a month since he'd stolen the moon and had accepted the girls into his home permanently. He still felt a little strange whenever they called him dad, but then, the whole situation was still a little strange to him. Naturally, it had taken Margo the longest to start calling him dad. Then, when she too had begun using the word it was almost like a confirmation. He was a dad. Who would've thought it?

Gru turned onto a street littered with various shops. The market was in sight now, but before heading over to it he pulled into a vacant spot beside a coffee house, which due to a truly innovative decision on the owner's part was called 'Coffee Shop.' Actually vacant, was technically not the right word. It hadn't been vacant before Gru got there but the tiny sedan hadn't stood a chance against Gru's tank. After waiting at the DMV for so long he needed a cup of coffee.

XXX

Inside the coffee shop a dark skinned girl in a green apron was sitting at one of the tables. A crossword was spread out on its surface. She was eyeing it with some concentration. Occasionally she took a drink of her coffee.

"Hey, Ady how about this one?" She asked, while eyeing another girl who was sitting behind the counter. "A three letter word for despicable."

The other girl, who was resting her feet up on the counter top lowered the book she was reading and ran a hand through her short red hair as she considered this.

"Three letters?" She asked.

"Yeah…maybe bad?"

"Could be…or low." She said.

"Hmm." Ady yawned as the other girl returned to her crossword and looked up at the clock. Four hours to go until close and they'd only had one customer today and he'd only come by to ask directions and use their bathroom. She'd got through 1/3 of her book and had helped her friend through the crosswords in every paper on the rack.

She saw movement out of the corner of her eye and looked out the window.

"Hey, Vanessa, I think we actually have a customer." She said as she removed her beat up tennis shoes from the counter. Vanessa, who had been in the process of taking a drink of her coffee, started choking when she too looked up. Ady looked over at her, surprised. The girl was staring out the window, wide eyed.

"That guy." Vanessa said in a strangled voice while indicating the door. "The freezing guy."

"What?" Ady asked bewilderedly as Vanessa stood up quickly enough so that her chair toppled over and hurried towards the back of the store.

"Keep him busy, I'm going to call the cops!"

"Hey wait!" She said as the door at the back of the store closed behind Vanessa. She spun around in time to see Gru enter the shop. He stood in the doorway for a moment. The word 'looming' came to Ady's mind as he stepped forward, his hands behind his back. He was grinning, but it was not a grin that inspired nice thoughts. Ady forced herself to smile as he approached the counter.

"Can I help you?" She asked a little nervously.

"Just a large cup ove black coffee, please." He said as he straightened his scarf. She eyed one of the coffee makers quickly and then the door that Vanessa had gone through.

"Uh…I'm out of coffee, but if you don't mind waiting, I can make some more." Gru seemed to consider this.

"Very well." He said as he leaned on the counter with a sigh. She turned nervously and grabbed at one of the coffee pots. There was a loud sloshing noise as she picked it up and she felt the man's gaze on her again.

"Uh… it's been sitting out for a while…it's probably really cold." She dumped the pot out in one of the sinks, frowning as a cloud of steam rose from it. Gru raised his eyebrow and his blue eyes flickered briefly to the door behind her. He cleared his throat as she went about making another pot of coffee.

"Dis place ees very quiet today. Not a lot of people around." Ady had jumped when he spoke to her. Gru's smile broadened wickedly. "Very few people walking around outside as well."

"Yeah…it's been a slow day." She said, watching as the coffee ran into the pot. She was torn between trying to stall long enough for Vanessa to call the cops and her desire to get away from this man.

"Out ove curiosity, where ees your phone?"

"Uhh…it's in the back, but we don't usually let customers use it." She said quickly. She vaguely heard the sound of a zipper being undone but didn't think much of it until she heard the loud zapping noise. Ady spun around in time to see the table near the window turn into a pile of dust. Gru's coat was still open and was holding an exceptionally strange looking gun. He leaned on the counter and smiled at her pleasantly. Ady barely noticed this however because she was too busy looking at the barrel, which was pointed right at her.

"All right, so here's de deal." He said conversationally. "When dat coffee ees done you will geeve me a cup and den you will show me out de door. Eef I am gone before de cops arrive, I will not disintegrate you." Ady looked down at her apron, where a red laser point had appeared. She swallowed and turned back towards the coffee machine. The pot wasn't full yet, but she pulled it out anyways, ignoring the stream of coffee that hit the counter and ran down onto the floor. Then she grabbed a large cup and poured the coffee stiffly before handing it out to Gru.

He took it and set it on the counter before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a five-dollar bill. Ady stared at the offered cash dumbly.

"Uh…you're uh…just take it."

"Do I look like someone who would steal a cup ove coffee to you? Please, dat ees beneath me." She took the bill from him and opened the register, her eyes darting back to the gun as she made his change. When he took it he finally tucked the weapon back into his coat and grabbed the coffee again. As if the situation couldn't get any more absurd, he tossed a quarter into her and Vanessa's tip jar and headed back towards the door, zipping his coat up as he did.

A few minutes later Vanessa returned.

"Hey, the cops are on their way. Where is he?" Ady looked at her for a moment before pointing at the front door.

"I told you to stall him."

"He had a gun pointed at me!" Ady returned.

"That freeze ray thing? He was the one who froze all of our customers last month." Ady grabbed Vanessa by the arm and pulled her far enough to point towards the pile of dust on the floor.

"Does _that_ look frozen to you!" She said while in the distance she heard the sound of sirens.

XXX

The girls were there to greet him when Gru returned home, kicking the front door closed as he tried to balance the shopping bags and his coffee. Agnes ran up to him happily and made the situation more complicated by grabbing a hold of his leg.

"Uh, Agnes dis ees not a good time for dis, okay, goeeng to make me trip." He said. In the meantime Edith had grabbed the mace he kept near the door for unwanted visitors. It was too heavy for her to lift all the way so she was dragging it after her.

"Edith, put it down." Margo said as she grabbed one of the bags from Gru so that he could focus on walking with a four year old attached to him.

They put the bags down on the kitchen counter. After he had his hands free, Gru pulled Agnes gently off of his leg and picked her up. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, or at least attempted to do so with her tiny arms as he unpacked the groceries with his free hand.

After a moment he heard the sound of someone clearing their throat. He turned and met Dr. Nefario's frown. His white coat was splattered with what looked like paint, his goggles were very obviously missing a lens and there appeared to be a bow hanging from the tiny fray of white hair on his head.

"Gru, we need to talk." He said.

Gru set Agnes down on one of the red stools by the counter.

"Excuse me for a moment gurls. Don't get into any of dat. I will make dinner een a little while." He added as Edith peaked curiously into one of the bags. He followed the doctor out of the room.

"I deed not expect to be gone for so long. Eet weel not happen again." He said as they headed towards the living room.

"Actually, that was not what I wanted to talk about…at least at the moment." He added as he grabbed at the bow in his hair. He eyed it for a moment before tossing it aside. "I was wondering, actually, when you plan on getting back to work." He said.

"Work?" Gru said. "Weel, I guess I 'aven't really thought about it. De whole moon theeng was kind of my beeg plan. Where do you go from stealing de moon?"

"You haven't come up with _any_ plans?" The doctor said wearily.

"Well, one or two leetle ones…I suppose."

"Have you considered collaboration?" The doctor said as he pulled his goggles off and eyed the empty socket.

"What? Not really…why?"

Dr. Nefario nodded towards the living room.

"You have a call."

XXX

Upon seeing Ady, most people assumed that she was in her early twenties or perhaps her late teens. She certainly dressed like it and she kept her hair in a moderately short pixie cut and the freckles probably didn't help matters. She was in fact twenty-nine and currently she was standing outside of the coffee shop a good hour after her shift officially ended.

After talking with the cops for three hours and then spending another hour and a half trying to explain to the frantic owner of the coffee shop exactly what had happened, Ady was finally given the okay to head home.

"I don't think I'm going to open tomorrow." The owner said glumly as he locked the door. "Ever since the freezing incident we've barely had any customers as it is. Now this. I suppose I'll call you girls if anything changes, but until further notice were closed." He said as he headed towards his car. Ady and Vanessa shared a look. Vanessa shrugged.

"I would have gotten a new job anyways." She said before heading towards her car.

Ady sighed and went to the side of the building where she was parked. Well, where she had been parked. It looked like something had run into her car at full force. There was a massive dent in the back and the window was shattered. She stared at the wreckage for a moment in exhaustion while she tried to decide whether she should get angry or freak out. She decided she was too tired to do either and instead pulled her keys out and unlocked the door.

Much to her surprise she was actually able to get the ugly thing started and to her increased surprise it still drove although she was unable to get it over 20 mph on the trip home.

After a slow and rickety drive in which she listened to nothing but the static on the radio because the antenna had rammed into the side of the building and was bent at odd angles, Ady pulled into the parking lot of an apartment complex that even the rats would probably steer clear of and got out of the car. She wasn't able to get the door shut the first time, but after slamming it a couple more times and then finally kicking it when her currently limited patience wore out it finally stuck, although whether she would be able to get it open again was another matter.

She headed towards a door on the ground floor of the building and opened it into a dingy room. The lock was broken and the only thing that kept the door locked while she was there was one of those flimsy chains on the inside. In normal circumstances this would not have bothered her quite as much as it bothered her right now and she made a mental note to have it fixed in the next couple of days. After kicking off her shoes and shedding her hoodie Ady headed towards her bedroom. She didn't bother getting undressed, but rather fell forward into her bed and stuffed her face in the pillow.

Starting tomorrow she'd have to start looking for a new job. For now it was time for sleep. A sleep that would most certainly be filled with hook nosed psychopaths with guns.


	2. The Woman With The Voice Like Silk

Chapter Two:

The Woman With The Voice Like Silk

Gru walked into the living room and stared up at the massive television screen as Dr. Nefario looked on with interest. There was an exceptionally attractive if not somewhat intimidating woman on the monitor. On the massive television her features were amplified. She was quite pale and had inky black hair, styled in the sort of shoulder length straight razor cut so it seemed that whoever had done it had taken some pains to make sure each strand was the same length. Because of this Gru got the impression that if she turned sharply her hair could probably cut through air molecules. She was also wearing a figure hugging black dress and holding an expensive looking cigarette holder a little ways from her lips. When she saw him she smiled.

"Do I have the pleasure of addressing Gru?" She said. In her heavy accent his name almost sounded like 'Gloo.' He cleared his throat and folded his slender hands behind his back.

"Yes, but I'm afraid you 'ave me at a disadvantage." He said in return.

"You're physical presence does not disappoint. It iz nice to see people keeping up with old traditions. Zese days it seems that most villains are young men in leather pants who look for a variety of reasons to go outside wizout a shirt on." She said as she tapped her cigarette on the side of an ashtray. "I am Polina, I wish to hire you." She added.

"Ah, well…Polina, I am afraid I will have to be turning you down. I do not work for anyone but myself."

"I am aware of zis, but if you have any major aspirations as a villain, I suggest you listen to my offer before casting it aside." She said as replaced the silver holder in her lips.

"Proceed." Gru said wearily.

"While you would be taking orders from me, I would like you to consider zis…as more of a partnership. A partnership zat will result in you becoming ze most powerful man in ze world." Gru raised his eyebrow.

"I am listening." He said skeptically.

"I do not like to talk ove my plans over ze monitor. If you are interested you will come visit me at zis address tomorrow at noon." She said while waving her cigarette hand at a brutish man, who had been standing in the shadows behind her. The man stepped forward and held a business card up to the screen. "Identify yourself to ze person at ze front desk. I do hope to see you soon." With that the screen cut off, leaving Gru looking at his own reflection.

"Dad?" Gru was shaken out of his thoughts. He turned towards the doorway. Margo was standing in the hall eyeing him cautiously. "Um, we're getting kind of hungry."

"Of course, right." He said. "We are done here." He said as motioned for Margo to precede him to the kitchen.

"Uh Gru what are you…" The doctor started. Gru raised his hand without turning around.

"We will discuss it later." He said.

XXX

Fifteen minutes later, Gru was well into making sloppy joes and macaroni. He had a cookbook open and was addressing it with his eyebrow raised while the meat cooked. In a pot beside it he had pasta boiling.

"You've never made sloppy joes before?" Margo said amusedly while sitting on the counter beside him and eyeing the cookbook. Occasionally she helped him by adding ingredients. From the stool at the counter behind them, Agnes was pulling at his apron.

"In what circumstances would I have ever wished to make sloppy joes? What is it Agnes? I am busy right now."

"Can I help?" Agnes asked, wide eyed.

"Help with what? Thee meat is cooking and the macaroni is boiling, there is literally nothing you can be adding to this process." Agnes' face fell.

"Oh." She said dismally. He hesitated for a moment before sighing.

"All right." He eyed the stovetop for a moment then grabbed a wooded spoon and handed it to Agnes. "Here, hold this spoon, it is of the utmost importance." He said before turning back to the stove and poking at the hamburger again. Margo was stirring the cheese simmering in a third pot.

Gru opened up one of the cabinets and grabbed a baking dish. From behind him, Edith, who had crawled up the counter, grabbed at the collar of his turtleneck as he went past.

"Got you!" She said. Gru shouted as he took a misstep and nearly dropped the dish. After a moment when he was certain he had his footing, he backed up carefully and was able to hoist Edith onto his shoulders.

"Please…do not do that." He said to her after setting the dish down safely.

Finally the dinner was finished and the girls were able to sit down to eat. Gru took his apron off and joined them. He eyed his plate wearily for a little while before raising one of the slices of bread, which was concealing the hamburger in the sloppy joe.

"Just try it, it's good." Margo said from the other side of the table.

"This…is not cuisine. This is garbage between soggy pieces of bread." He said while waving one of the buns to demonstrate. Margo rolled her eyes with just the hint of a smile and returned to her own meal. Gru looked sideways at Agnes who was staring at her macaroni disappointingly.

"What ees the matter, why are you not eating?"

"I don't like it." She said with a scowl as she crossed her arms.

"But it ees what you asked for. You 'ave not even tried it yet."

"I like the macaronis shaped like shells." She said while giving him a wide-eyed look, which seemed to say that macaronis that were not shaped like shells were one of the worst things she could think of.

"It will taste exactly thee same, the shape of thee pasta ees irrelevant." He said. She started poking at it miserably with her fork.

"I do not have any pasta in thee shape of shells. If you do not like it, just eat thee sloppy joes."

"These sloppy joes aren't runny enough." Edith said sulkily from the other side of the table. "The ones at the orphanage were all gooey."

"Well dat ees probably because they did not contain any meat." Gru said as he sampled the macaroni experimentally.

"But they were more gooey."

"It ees plenty gooey, eat your dinner." After a moment he looked up, both girls were resting their chins in their palms and watching their dinner with disdain. Gru sighed heavily.

"Fine, fine, I will see what I can do." He said as he stood and took both plates. Margo gave the girls a stern look when he left.

"What?" Edith said. "I liked the goo."

After dinner, and after he had put the girls to bed, Gru cleaned up the kitchen and put away the leftover food, at least that which he felt was salvageable, including the two different kinds of macaroni. He hadn't had any of the shell shaped ones so he'd improvised by looking up a recipe for homemade pasta which actually hadn't taken that long and making the noodles himself. They wound up looking like little oddly shaped skulls. Still, Agnes seemed to enjoy them. The rest of the Sloppy Joes, which had been made almost perilously gooey were poured out in the sink. Gru watched as the last of it dripped down the drain before shaking his head.

He stooped down to pick up one of Agnes' Unicorn toys and caught movement in the doorway. Margo was standing there in her nightshirt, rubbing her shoulder with a hint of discomfiture.

"Margo, why aren't you in bed?" He asked, while straightening. "If you are going to tell me you are still hungry, I will be very upset." He added.

"No, I just…" Margo crossed the kitchen.

"Um, I just wanted to…thank you…for making dinner…you know twice." She said awkwardly. "It was the best dinner ever." She added before standing on her tiptoes and wrapping her arms around his midsection. He blinked and then smiled a little.

"You are welcome." He said as he kneeled down and returned her hug.

XXX

After pressing the button to activate the chair in the hallway and then taking the elevator down Gru stepped out into the lab. Anyone who might've been observing him would have noticed that his expression had changed. He looked much more serious and focused now. His shoulders were squared and his hands were behind his back, giving him an impressive and slightly sinister appearance, this was somewhat spoiled when he accidentally tripped over a hazardously placed toy.

"So what are you going to do about the offer?" The doctor asked as Gru approached him and set the toy absently on one of the counters.

"I am not sure." Gru said. "I do not usually work with others and you know how villains are…there is thee matter of conflicting egos."

"I think you should meet with her." Nefario said. He was sitting at a bench with a complicated tool in one his gloved hand. A gun was sitting in pieces in front of him. "As much as I enjoy playing dress up and getting kicked in the shins, I would like to get back to doing some real work."

"I suppose I could at least hear what she 'as to say." He said as he picked up a dart that was lying off to one side.

"Ooh, be careful with that. Very strong paralytic. Deadly if it gets into your bloodstream…I've been working on finding an antidote in case of, you know, accidents but so far I haven't had any luck. Did you get the address she gave you?" He added as Gru placed the dart back down carefully.

"Yes, I know thee place." He said darkly.

"Good. Uh, we have another matter discuss. What are you going to do about the girls?"

"Well, I suppose I could take them with me tomorrow." Gru said while leaning over the doctor's shoulder to eye the gun.

"Well you certainly aren't going to leave them here with me again. Still, I was thinking about something more permanent, like hiring a babysitter."

"To come here?" The doctor shrugged.

"Well, what about your mother?" Gru gave him a look. The doctor cleared his throat.

"All right then, not her. You could always put an ad in the paper." Gru considered this.

"Well, I suppose it wouldn't be like they'd be here by themselves." He said while eyeing a group of his minions, who were polishing one of the big laser guns. He sighed. "I suppose, I don't have much of a choice. Mike Fred." He shouted. Two of the minions threw down their cloths and padded up to him. "Go make sure there is an ad for a babysitter in tomorrows paper. Make it convincing." He added as they ran off.

XXX

The next morning Ady was awakened by the sound of the television turning on in the next room and blaring at full volume. She stumbled out of bed and headed towards the sound.

"Dillon, it's eight o clock in the morning and these walls are paper thin, turn that down." She said as she walked past the couch.

The young man, who had his feet up on a box that was serving as a coffee table moved a few strands of greasy black hair out of his eyes and gave her a side look before turning the tv down a couple bars.

"Hey, you know your car has a big dent in it." He said as Ady fished through the cabinets in a small kitchen for a box of cereal.

"Yeah, I noticed, thanks."

"Looks like it was hit by a train or something."

"Yeah, I know. I'm going to have to take it in later." She returned to couch with a bowl and sat down.

"Take it in? It'll cost more to fix that then the thing is worth." She frowned and her eyes fell on Dillons skinny legs for a moment.

"Are you wearing my pants again?" She asked with a sigh.

"I went out clubbing, all of my jeans were dirty."

"Stay out of my closet, Dillon." She muttered before taking a bite of her cereal and grabbing at the newspaper sitting by his feet. She flipped over to the wanted ads.

He peered over her shoulder curiously.

"You're looking for another job?"

"Yup, Coffee Shop closed down." She said, her mouth half full.

"Didn't it just open up a couple months ago?"

"Yeah well, we lost business after that whole mass freezing incident and then the psycho came back yesterday and zapped one of our tables."

"Huh, so how are you going to pay your half of the rent?"

"Well that would be why I'm looking in the wanted ads. I'm perfectly fine, by the way, thanks for asking…not emotionally scarred or anything. How much experience do you suppose is required to be a bank teller?"

"I dunno, there's a lot of…math and stuff with that isn't there?" He said, while ignoring her cynicism.

She raised her eyebrow and continued down the list.

"The rest are just babysitting jobs." She said grimly. "Would you trust your kid to someone answering a newspaper ad?"

"If I had kids I'd sell them to Pakistanis so they could work in a Nike sweatshop." He said as he picked up the remote and began flipping through channels.

"That's a nice image, Dillon. Wow look at this one. They're offering ten dollars an hour." Ady read through it briefly before brushing off some of the magazines on the makeshift table and grabbing a pen.

"What are you doing?" Dillon asked.

"I'm circling the ad."

"No, no." He said while folding the paper back, halting the process of her writing. "When someone offers ten dollars an hour to watch their kid it means they're desperate. This brat is probably like…the spawn of Satan or something." She pulled the newspaper out of his grip.

"I didn't say I was going to for sure, it just doesn't hurt to consider it. And it says it's three girls"

"That's even worse…you know what they say about it when there are three of them. They can surround you…then when you're watching the first two the third can get you from behind." She seemed to think about this for a moment.

"Isn't that raptors? How much did you drink last night?"

"Hey I know what I'm talking about. Besides how much experience do you have with kids?" She shrugged.

"I used to baby-sit for one of my cousins. Look, it's just an option…if I don't find something else."

"Fine, but do me a favor." He said as he stood. "If you do take the job, do not bring them here." He headed off towards the bedroom. Ady shook her head and eyed the ad again. The number was written in bold letters at the bottom. She shrugged and grabbed her hoodie from the previous day. After a moment of fishing through the pockets she pulled out her cell phone. It didn't hurt to call.

XXX

Gru parked outside of the bank, slamming into a very nice convertible in the process.

"Why do we have to be here?" Edith whined as the girls unloaded from the tank.

"Because Doctor Nefario is very tired aftor yesterday." Gru said while helping Agnes out.

"We could have watched ourselves."

"That I do not doubt, but I would prefer that thee house be in one piece when I return." He said as they walked in. A woman at the desk gave Gru an odd look as he walked past and held open the door to the men's restroom as the girls entered cautiously.

"You're meeting is in a bathroom?" Edith asked while crossing her arms.

"No eet is not in a bathroom." Gru returned as he approached a urinal and took the retina scan. The girls watched as the wall opened.

"Follow close and do not touch anything." He said as they headed down a luxuriously decorated hallway.

"Cool." Edith said from behind him.

"The Bank Of Evil?" Margo read as they went through the door.

"Sit down here." He said, while motioning to one of the benches, before heading to the desk. He halted when he saw who was sitting there. Mr. Perkins glared at him from the chair.

"Hello again Gru." He said through his teeth. Gru regained his composure and cleared his throat.

"Hello Perkins, it has been a while."

"Not nearly long enough." Perkins said while standing. "You know because of you and your…interfering my son is now a laughing stock."

"Me? Your son kidnapped my gurls. It is not my fault he wound up dere on de moon."

"Yes, I notice you still have those…brats with you." Perkins said while nodding at the girls on the couch. "I don't know how you beat my son, Gru but it's only a matter of time before other people start to see what I already have. Anyone can see you've lost your touch…" Gru glared and put his knuckles on the desk.

"I believe I had an appointment today, This ees the address I was given." Mr Perkins opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted. There was a sound from nearby that sort of sounded like someone trying to clear their throat, if said person was, as it were, tongue less. Both Gru and Perkins looked in that direction.

Doug was standing in the doorway into what had been Mr. Perkins office. He pointed at Gru and then motioned for him to follow. Gru raised his eyebrow and straightened. He cast Perkins a dark look before following the hulking man.

"I will not be long." He said to Margo, Edith and Agnes on his way in. "Try to behave yourselves. Although…" he added as a thought occurred to him. "Meester Perkins loves singing and annoying noises, so feel free to share with him."

XXX

"Gru, I'm very pleased that you decided to come." Polina said as he entered.

"Thee pleasure is all mine." He said as he accepted her outstretched hand, his other hand still behind his back. Polina smiled with her mauve painted lips and motioned for Doug to leave.

"Now we can get down to business." She said as she sat on the desk surface and crossed her legs.

"That is a very…fetching coat." He said while indicating her fur.

"Thank you, it is made from ze fur of over thirteen endangered species." She picked up her cigarette holder. "Do you have a light?"

Gru patted his jacket before pulling out a silver lighter. He didn't smoke, but he was aware that it was always useful to have a lighter on him if he were meeting with someone who did. He flipped the lid open and lit her cigarette. She inhaled with a smile as he shut the lighter again with a snap and replaced it.

"I will be frank." She said after a moment. "I have been working for some time now, gazering resources. I have a considerable amount of money in banks all over ze world and I have recruits working in major government agencies here and in China and Russia, the UK, France, Germany etcetera ectetera. I have a plan, but I need someone like you to help me pull it off."

"If you don't mind me asking, a plan for what exactly?" Gru asked, raising his eyebrow.

"To take over ze world." She said as she blew out a thin stream of smoke. "What ozer plan is there?"

"That…is very interesting…and you have all of those things?" She smiled and stood.

"It took some time, but you might say zat I have power over a certain type of man." She said as she drew a line across his chest with her index finger. Gru cleared his throat with some embarrassment.

"Well, so far it would seem as if you are already in thee process of taking over the wurld, what do you need me for?"

"Gru, I am more of a corporate mastermind. What I need is someone with your creative arsenal, your grim determination and your…" She seemed to think about this for a moment. "Richesse dans les années et l'expérience." She finished smoothly. Gru gave her a slight smile with just a hint of irritation.

"Je parle français, merci." He responded dryly.

"I assure you I did not mean it as an insult. You see Gru, we have a common problem. Zere is no place for us in zis modern world of villainry. Zese days our people put all zere faith in younger men. Stupid men, wiz zere robots and zere skull belt buckles. Men who are still wet behind ze ears. Zey tell you that you need to retire and as for me, well the job of the villainess zese days is to be a secretary to zese _boys_, to stand around in revealing clothing while zey have all of the fun!" During this speech her otherwise smooth voice began to grow slightly shrill. She cleared her throat after a moment, trying to regain her composure. "But I assure you, after my plan is realized, zey will beg us to allow zem to spit shine our shoes. So…do we have an agreement?" Gru eyed her outstretched hand with hesitation.

"Come now, I would think that ze man who stole ze moon would have more ambition zen zis." He looked up and opened his mouth, a questioning look on his face. Polina placed her gloved finger in front of his lips, hushing him.

"I hear a great many things. Perkins told everyone that it was his son's plan, but zat idiot could not find ze moon if he were stuck in one of it's craters…which according to ze last I heard…" She said while shrugging. "Don't you think that a man like you deserves to have ze world at his feet?" Gru raised his eyebrows.

XXX

Translations:

Polina: Richness in years and experience

Gru: I speak french, thank you.

Also because I was unable to reply directly to those of you who do not have an account or did not sign in, I will place replies to those people at the end of chapters.

Lerg: Thank you very much for your review. I hope this chapter did not disappoint. :)

Thanks to those of you who added the story to their favorites and alerts too.


	3. The Babysitter

Chapter Three:

The Babysitter

Margo couldn't help but notice that on the way home her father seemed a lot quieter and more focused then he had in the last month or so. They had seen the woman he had been talking to briefly. She was a tall somewhat scary looking woman in a black figure hugging dress, with black hair and dark eyes and lips and nails. She also appeared to be wearing the hides of several animals and had a smile as crooked as corkscrew.

She didn't seem like the type of woman who surprised easily, but she had seemed slightly staggered when she saw the girls.

"_I was not aware zat you had children." She had said in a thick accent. _

_"Yes, well it is a relatively new development." Her father had responded while motioning for the girls to stand so that they could get going._

_"I see…are you schooling zem?"_

_"Eet ees still summer…I suppose they will go to school in thee fall." _

_"I meant in villainy." _

_"You can go to school for that? Cool!" Edith had said. The woman had looked at her as one might look at dog that was circling around a patch of carpet with a strained look on its face. _

_"It has not really come up." Gru had replied while taking Edith's hand and hoisting Agnes onto his shoulder. _

_"Well, if you are interested I know of a very good boarding school in Switzerland. Zey educate the children of villains. Zey teach them ze proper manners and protocol and everysing." _

_"Swizzerland? Uh…no, thank you… I am perfectly capable of teaching them myself, if it comes to dat." Gru said. _

_"If you are sure. You might start wiz ze importance of a sleek and diabolical wardrobe." She'd said while eyeing Agnes and Edith especially. "Eet ees important to keep up appearances." _

_"I will keep that in mind." He'd said as they headed out the door. _

"She looked like Croo…Curull…Crull…" Agnes started while they got into the car.

_"Cruella Deville?" Margo had finished._

"Yeah…only less old."

When they got home, Gru opened the door for them and they ran inside.

"I 'ave to see Doctor Nefario in thee lab." He said as he pressed the button to activate the lift. "I will only be an hour or so, then we will have deener."

"Can we come? I want to play with the laser guns again!" Edith said while making a shooting motion with her hand.

"No, not today." He replied. "If you need something, call me on thee monitor." He said as he stepped onto the platform and disappeared.

XXX

The doctor looked up from his work as Gru approached.

"Well?" He said, with just a hint of eagerness. Gru pulled a bundle of papers out of his jacket and handed them to Nefario.

"I accepted thee offer. These are plans for things we will need in thee next couple of weeks." Gru said with a sigh as he sat down on the red armchair, which had recently been removed from the remains of the rocket. The doctor took the papers from him and eyed them. He grinned a little.

"Oh I like this woman already."

"I though you might. I'm supposed to meet with her again tomorrow. Have you had any calls about thee ad?"

"No, I think maybe putting the salary at ten dollars was a mistake…kind of makes you look desperate." Gru was about to say something else when a red light went on over their heads.

"Oh, there's the phone." The doctor said while looking up.

XXX

Meanwhile, the girls were upstairs in the living room. Agnes was sitting on the floor playing with one of her toy unicorns. Margo was attempting to play with her, although she was having a hard time following the story as the younger girl made it up. Edith looked on dully from the couch.

"And then the unicorn found a magical forest." Agnes said as she trotted it over to Margo's knees. "And a magical fairy. _That's you_." She added in a whisper. "And the fairy gave the unicorn the power to fly."

"Uh, yeah…the power to fly." Margo said while waving her hands a little. Edith rolled her eyes.

"This is boring. I want to go down to the lab."

"Dad said no." Margo said while Agnes waved the unicorn toy around in the air, making whooshing noises.

"Why? We've been down there while he's working before."

"I don't know Edith, just find something else to do." Edith sighed heavily and fell backwards on the couch.

"Did you see that big guy at the bank, the one who kept smiling at us?" She asked after a moment, staring at the ceiling.

"What about him?" Margo said.

"He had no _tongue_." Edith said. She had removed the gum she was chewing and was playing with it between her fingers.

"I din't like him, he was scary…and not in a good way like daddy." Agnes said, while lowering her toy.

"I mean how do you think he eats and stuff?" Edith continued.

"Dad does know…some interesting people." Margo said carefully, while ignoring Edith's question. She was thinking of the woman. She hadn't liked her much.

"I wonder how you'd even cut out someone's tongue." Edith continued from the couch, now more to herself while she enjoyed a few moments of reflection on this matter. Margo's own thoughts were interrupted when the phone rang.

Edith sat up and shared a look with the other girls.

"We have a phone?" Edith asked after a few moments. Margo shrugged and stood.

"I guess so." After a moment of searching she found it stuffed in a corner near some of her father's strange trophies. She pried the receiver from what looked like the jaw of some strange massive creature and an old cannon. She couldn't remember ever hearing the phone ring in the time that they'd been there. Her father always used either the television screen or his cell phone.

"Uh…hello?" She said cautiously.

"Hey, uh, my name's Ady Owens, I'm calling about the babysitting job." Margo raised her eyebrow.

"Babysitting?" She asked while eyeing her sisters. Edith stuck her tongue out.

"Tell them we don't want any." She said from her place on the couch.

"Uh, are you sure you have the right number?" Margo asked. There was a pause on the other end before the caller answered.

"This is the number in the ad…you must be one of the girls, right? Can I talk to your mom or dad?"

"Um…my dad's kind of busy right now…what ad?" Margo asked. As if on cue she heard the sound of the lift in the hall and a moment later Gru walked into the living room. He motioned for her to give him the phone. She did so after a moment of hesitation. Edith jumped up from the couch and approached them and Agnes followed on that basis that she didn't want to be left out.

"Heello?" He said. "You are calling about thee job?" Margo watched her father uneasily.

"Yeah…um I was hoping to get a little more information, actually…"

"Eet ees regular babysitting job…cheeldren, sitting…ensuring that nothing gets broken or set on fire." Gru said, while waving his hand absently. There was a pause on the other end, presumably while the applicant was trying to decide if Gru was joking or not.

"Dad." Margo whispered. He held up his finger.

"Ookay…how long would it be for?" The girl on the phone said carefully.

"Dat ees up for deliberation at dis point. I will be very busy over the next couple of weeks. What!" Gru said while covering the mouthpiece. Agnes had been pulling on his pant leg and Edith had been tugging desperately at his scarf.

"We don't want a babysitter!" Edith said. The other girls chimed in, in agreement. Gru waved his hand at them, while trying to make out what the girl on the phone was saying.

"Well, I haven't done a lot of babysitting but…"

"Look, can you start tomorrow?" He said, shouting slightly so that he might be heard over the din.

"Don't…don't you want to know some stuff about me first?" The girl asked, a little bewildered.

"Why would dat matter?" Gru said.

"Uhh…"

"Do you know where Cinder Crow Shoal ees?" Gru said, his voice getting increasingly louder.

"Yeah…"

"Just drive down thee street. Eet ees thee big hause with thee tank out front, you cannot mees eet."

"Tank…"

"Be here at three o' clock." He hung up the phone.

"Look, I have to hire someone." He said when Edith and Agnes had begun to protest again. "I 'ave an important job I must be focusing on in thee next month."

"I don't see why we need a stupid babysitter. Why can't uncle Nefario watch us?" Edith said, while crossing her arms.

"Because he ees very old." Gru said as he straightened his scarf. "And cannot take much more excitement. Besides, he will also be very busy. Eet will be fine."

"Can't we come with you?" Agnes asked while giving him a wide-eyed look.

"No, you may not."

"You're actually going to bring someone here?" Margo asked heatedly. Gru turned towards her and paused. He recognized that slightly guarded and somewhat suspicious look he had come to expect from her after they first met. She hadn't given him that look in over a month.

"Yes, but I will make sure thee more dangerous weapons are kept below. And the minions will keep mostly heeden." The girls looked at him crossly, apart from Agnes, who looked distressed.

"Does this mean you don't wanna spend time with us anymore?" She asked, wide eyed.

"What? No. Look thees will only be temporary." He said while kneeling slightly. "And eet does not mean that we cannot spend time with each other." He added. "I will just be a leetle more busy ees all." Margo and Edith shared a hesitant look.

"Promise." Agnes said.

"I promise." He said.

She stuck out the hand still holding her unicorn toy and extended her pinky slightly.

He smiled a little and wrapped his own pinky around hers.

After releasing her pinky promise he picked her up. The other girls seemed to relax a little, including Margo whose expression softened again.

"What's for dinner, I'm getting hungry." Edith asked as Agnes stuffed her face in Gru's scarf.

"There is plenty of macaroni left. You can have dat." Edith stuck her tongue out.

"I don't like macaroni." Gru sighed.

"All right, come on den, we will find something." He said as he headed towards the kitchen, the lab and doctor Nefario momentarily forgotten.

XXX

The next day Ady was sitting at the small foldout table near her kitchen drinking instant coffee. Vanessa had come over an hour before and had joined her. She had the paper from the day before spread out on the table and was examining the ad.

"I always thought you didn't like kids." Vanessa said as she took a sip of instant coffee and shuddered a little before adding some cream. "I mean, wasn't that one of the reasons you moved in with Dillon in the first place?"

"I don't dislike kids…" Ady said after a moments pause. "I just don't have a lot of experience with them. Moving in with Dillon has nothing to do with it…besides people with kids aren't allowed to live in this building because of the rats." Vanessa frowned and moved her feet up onto the chair.

"Well, at least it's three girls." She said. "You'd be in trouble if it were boys. Boys are nightmares at that age."

"I don't know." Ady said wearily, while resting her chin in her palm. "When I was younger I was horrible. I used to terrorize the men my mom brought home. One of her boyfriends actually wound up getting a restraining order."

"Wow, well…at least you have experience with it then. What did your mom do to discipline you?"

"She cried a lot… then when I went to college she got remarried and moved to California without telling me…her number's unlisted."

"Oh…well…that doesn't help much I guess. Still, if this job doesn't work out you can always apply for a job at The Hideaway with me. I have an interview today…"

"That café on the beach? That's kind of out of the way isn't it?"

"Yeah, I did that on purpose." She said dismally. "It's not anywhere close to The Coffee Shop."

"We'll see." Ady said. She looked at her watch. "I have to be at this place in an hour, I'd better get ready." Vanessa rose her cup.

"Here's hoping we both have psycho free days." Ady clinked mugs with her and downed the rest of her coffee.

XXX

She managed to borrow Dillons car for the day. Technically he hadn't given her permission. When she left the house he was still asleep. She did ask him and he sort of responded, but it would be difficult to say whether 'wzfgtl' meant yes or no.

She spotted the house halfway down the road and upon seeing it felt a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. The neighborhood itself was quite nice, in that sort of creepy uniform way, but this house stuck out like a black stain on white satin. It was twice as big as the surrounding houses, much darker and sat upon a dry neglected lawn. Parked in front there was indeed a tank.

Ady pulled up to the curb and got out of the car cautiously. She stared up at the eyesore of a house for a moment, trying to resist the urge to get back in the car and drive home. Finally she closed it and walking up the driveway. As she did, she eyed the surrounding houses and couldn't help but notice there were a lot of For Sale signs about.

Okay…could just be a coincidence…She thought to herself before climbing the steps to the front door and taking a deep breath before knocking. For a moment in the impending silence she heard the various sounds from the neighborhood; dogs barking, the hum of bees, a car starting and etcetera then the door opened, revealing a girl of about ten. Ady felt the somewhat irrational panic of someone not accustomed to dealing with children. She smiled nervously.

"Hey…I'm here to baby-sit." She said.

XXX

Margo hadn't been certain what to expect from the babysitter. In her mind she'd imagined someone like Miss Hatty, but the girl at the door was fairly young. Her red hair was cut quite short and she was wearing a battered and washed out T-shirt with some indefinable logo on it, jeans that were chewed at the knees and a pair of converses that looked as if they'd been through a wood chipper.

"Hi." Margo said carefully. "Come in." She added.

The young woman stepped into house and Margo noticed, with some amusement as her gaze drifted over the various ornaments and decorations her father had hung in the hall.

"Uh…my dad's getting dressed, you can come into the living room." Margo said as she walked down the hall. The babysitter stood where she was for a moment, gawking at the massive cannon hanging above their heads before she started forward.

"Interesting…decoration…" She said, her voice wavering slightly as her eyes went from one sinister adornment to the next.

"Yeah, my dad has…interesting taste."

Agnes and Edith were in the living room when they entered. Edith looked up at the woman, who was staring at the couch with her eyebrow raised.

"Um, I'm Margo." Margo said from behind her, getting her attention. She motioned to her sisters. "And this is Edith and Agnes."

"I'm Ady." She said while raising her hand awkwardly.

"I'll go get my dad." Margo said before heading back out of the room. "Um, you can sit…if you want."

XXX

Margo knocked on her father's bedroom door.

"Yes?" She opened the door and peeked in.

"Dad, the babysitter's here." Gru was sitting on the edge of his bed putting his socks and shoes on. He had exchanged his usual jacket for one that was slightly dressier.

"All right." He said as he stood and tucked a lighter into his pocket. "You will behave yourselves? I do not wish to have to find a new babysitter for tomorrow."

"Don't tell me." Margo said as he followed her out of the room.

"Right, well just make sure Edith stays away from thee lab and the heavy artillery."

When they entered the living room, Ady's attention was on Agnes who had been coloring and was now showing the woman her squiggles, which she claimed was magical Unicorn and it's unicorn friends in a meadow.

"Wow that's…that's very nice." Ady said.

"So, you are thee babysitter." Gru said from behind her. The young woman turned around. Margo was in a perfect position to see her expression as it went from the puzzled somewhat awkward look she had worn while dealing with Agnes to absolute terror in what seemed like seconds flat. She shouted and stepped back, tripping over a toy in the process, which caused her to lose her footing.

Gru looked surprised for a second, as he was not accustomed to such a reaction _before_ he did something to warrant it. He flashed Margo an embarrassed smile and shrugged a little. She raised her eyebrow.

"You…_you_." Ady said while pointing at him. Gru took a few steps forward and Ady scrambled to her feet. "You, get away from me." She said as she grabbed a lamp off of the end table near the couch and held it out defensively. Gru cleared his throat.

"Would you gurls go into the keetchen for a moment."

"Aww, I wanna watch." Edith said.

"Come on guys." Margo said while taking Agnes by the hand and pulling Edith down from the couch by her collar. "You're not going to do anything…you know…awful are you." Margo directed at her father, who gave her an entirely untrustworthy smile.

"Me? Of course not. There are just…matters I must discuss with thee babysitter." Margo gave him a doubtful look but ushered her sisters out of the room anyways.

When they were gone Gru turned back to the woman. She raised the lamp a little.

"You are from thee coffee shop, right?" He said as he approached her. He reached into his jacket and she tensed. When he removed his hand he was holding a pair of sunglasses. He flipped them open in a single motion and slipped them on, smiling at her discomfort. Then, before she had time to react he wrenched the lamp from her hand. Ady recoiled as he placed it carefully back on the end table and straightened the lamp shade.

"From Nicaragua, veery expensive and not for hitting people with." He said.

"There is…no way…" Ady said, after finally finding her voice. "This cannot be happening to me." She said.

"Well, you answered thee ad…"

I am NOT babysitting for _you_." She said while circling around him in a cautious way, in order to get a clear shot to the door. Gru sighed.

"All right…" He said wearily. "I will show you to thee door." He said while turned on his heel and heading towards the hall. Ady stood frozen for a moment before she followed him. He opened the front door and she eyed him with distrust. She started forward but was halted when he put his arm out.

"Now here is thee problem. I do not 'ave time to find another babysitter. So…" He picked up a remote on a table near the entryway and pressed a button on it. "Originally I installed this to keep my neighbors dog out of my yard, but it will also work in these circumstances." He stooped down and picked up a stone lying on the stoop and then, after flashing her a smile threw towards his next-door neighbors house. There was a bright flash and Ady watched, slack jawed as the stone dropped on the ground, smoking.

"That fence is all around thee house and is set at about 60,000 volts. Eet _probably_ will not kill you, but it will be very uncomfortable. So, I will retorn at about nine or ten o' clock. I am leaving gurls! Be good!" He shouted. Ady was glued in place, still staring at the stone. "Have a…pleasant day." He said, with a hint of cruel amusement as he headed down the stairs towards the tank.

XXX

I was hoping to get this chapter up a little sooner, but this week has been ridiculous. My face swelled up because of a tooth infection and I've spent the last couple of days being nauseous 50 percent of the time while on the antibiotics. Anyways, it's done now and I am going to have SO much fun with the story from now on.

Hopefully it turned out all right. Thanks for all of the reviews. If I missed replying to anyone, I apologize.


	4. Ground Rules

Chapter Four:

Ground Rules

"Is she dead?" Agnes asked while crawling up on the massive crocodile couch and eyeing Ady with innocent curiosity.

"I don't know…poke her with something." Edith responded while absently grabbing at the mace Gru had leaning up against the wall.

"Leave that alone Edith." Margo said sternly. "She's not dead…I think. Hey, are you all right?" She asked while shaking Ady's shoulder a little. After their father had left the woman had walked numbly into the living room and had sat down on the couch. She hadn't moved or blinked in a while. Her left eye occasionally flinched.

Finally, her eyes focused on the eldest girl when she addressed her, then they moved to the faces of the other two. The youngest smiled brightly at her when she looked at her.

"Yay, your awake. Do you want to hold my unicorn?" She asked while holding the massive thing out to her. "It makes me feel better when I'm sad." Ady stared at it unconsciously, finally she blinked…it was hard to stay in paralysis when I giant pink fluffy unicorn was staring at you.

"Do you want some water or something?" Margo asked with a hint of apprehension. What had her father done to this woman?

"Uhh…yeah…" Ady said after a moment. "…water…"

"Okay." Margo stood. "Follow me." Ady stood and followed Margo as she headed towards the kitchen. While in the hall, she gloomily eyed the décor again. It really was very distressing. There were wanted posters and newspaper clippings talking about various criminal acts as well as other sinister images. There were a variety of ancient weapons on stands and handing from the wall. A giant Venus flytrap was in the entryway into the living room, as was what looked like an iron maiden, although it was shut and locked. Actually, it might have been cool if the guy hadn't turned out to be _that_ guy. When she had been a kid her neighbor had had a lot of cool old stuff from when he was in the war…but that had been for display, not for recreation.

When they got to the kitchen, Ady saw that it really wasn't much better. There were a lot of odd instruments hanging on the wall…the sort of instruments you wouldn't expect to see in a kitchen…unless it was the kitchen of Hannibal Lecter. Margo went up to the sink and poured her a glass of water while the woman sat on one of the stools.

"Here." Margo said while offering the glass.

"Why…why is there a chainsaw in here?" Ady asked while pointing at it.

"It's for chainsawing stuff." Edith said while her and Agnes headed into the kitchen after them. Ady had taken the glass of water from Margo thankfully. After taking a few sips she focused once more on the girls. They looked normal enough and they certainly didn't look much like the psychopath that had forced her to baby-sit them. In fact between the three of them they had three different hair colors and two different eye colors.

A thought occurred to her sluggishly, while her mind tried to catch up with the situation.

"You guys aren't like…on milk cartons somewhere are you?" Margo raised her eyebrow.

"Uh no…we live here."

"And that guy…he's…your…uh."

"He's our daddy…" Agnes said happily.

Ady eyed her for a moment with her eyebrows raised.

"So this isn't a hostage situation…" The girls looked at her blankly. Finally Margo shook her head slowly.

"No…"

"Ten dollars an hour." Ady sat back against the counter. "Unbelievable…I should have listened to Dillon." She said more or less to herself. Well she was stuck there now. She thought briefly about calling the police, then had a vision of them trying to come up the driveway and remembered the rock. That…probably wouldn't work…plus who knew what else the guy had around the yard for security if he used an electric fence to keep a dog out. The best thing she could so was just watch the man's kids and hope he let her leave when he came back. Then she could call the cops after she went home and maybe get a cat scan or at least a lot of alcohol.

"This is boring…" Edith said, snapping her out of her thoughts. "I'm going to go play with the atomizer." She added as she headed towards the doorway.

"What's an atomizer?" Ady asked suspiciously while giving Margo a sideways look.

"It disintegrates things." Ady stared blankly ahead for a moment before setting her drink down and hurrying after Edith.

"Hey, hold on kid." She said as she stepped into the girl's path. Edith glared at her. "If I have to be here then we're going to have to have some rules and rule one is no disintegrating things."

"Your not the boss of me."

"Look, as long I'm here there isn't going to be any disintegrating or electrocuting or anything. I'm your babysitter…so, yeah that makes me the boss." She said.

"Dad put all of that stuff downstairs anyways Edith." Margo said from behind Edith.

"Well then what am I supposed to do?" Edith said after sticking her tongue out at Ady.

"Let's try something that's not upsetting." Ady said.

"We could color." Agnes said cheerfully.

"Okay…coloring…great." The young woman said while running her hand nervously through her red hair. Edith sighed heavily.

"This is going to be a long day." She said while Agnes ran off to get her coloring books and crayons. The girl pushed past Ady into the living room.

"No kidding." Ady muttered to herself.

XXX

Gru stepped out of his tank and looked up at the massive estate. He double-checked the directions, but really there was no need as there was a huge P on the front gate. Gru stepped forward and pressed the small button beside the structure. There was a brief buzzing sound as a camera adjusted itself and rotated towards him. After a moment the gate swung open and he stepped inside.

Miss Molyneux's front yard was a curious sight. To anyone else it would probably be worrying, but Gru looked on with approval. There were a lot of very odd and very dangerous looking sculptures made out of marble and glass and depicting various criminals and villains from times past. Most of them were of women. In the center of the path was a large ornate fountain depicting an outstretched hand made of stone with a large globe cupped in it. There was also a garden on both sides with plants that put the Venus flytrap in Gru's living room to shame. He paused briefly to admire them but was interrupted by that odd throat clearing sound again.

One of Polina's huge henchmen was standing in the threshold of the manor.

"I was just admiring thee garden. Ees that a peetcher plant from mount veectoria? How did she get that?" The man eyed him briefly before opening his mouth to display his lack of a tongue. "Ah, never mind." He said before following the man into the house.

"Gru, a pleasure, as always." Polina said as he was escorted into the foyer. She stretched her hand out. Gru eyed it for a moment before clearing his throat and kissing it awkwardly.

"Follow me, I have much to show you." She said while taking his arm and heading towards a huge set of stairs. In her heels, Polina was almost two inches taller than him. The heels themselves were very long and sharp. They probably could have stabbed right through the leather of a man's shoe.

"Did you give those plans to your scientist?" She asked as they headed down a hall lined with large hand painted portraits.

"Yes, he was very excited…he has already come up weeth some designs ove his own." Gru said while eyeing the pictures.

"I look forward to seeing zem. I have heard great things of your doctor Nefario."

"It would seem you hear a lot ove things. These are a nice touch, ees it your lineage?" He asked while indicating the portraits.

"Zey are husbands." She said smugly.

"What? All of dem?" He said while turning briefly to look back on the portraits they had passed.

"Some of zem are lineage…I sometimes lose track" Polina said. She gave Gru a dreadful smile. "I did tell you, I have power over a certain type of man."

"Apparently…" He said nervously as they walked into a massive room with a high ceiling. At the top was a gigantic chandelier. There were a couple of leather couches in the center on large fur rugs. It was probable that nearly two dozen species had been sacrificed for the purpose of furnishing the room. There were also massive curtains hanging from the windows. At one end was a fireplace the height of two men. Overtop it was a portrait of a woman in nobleman's dress. Underneath was the inscription; Portrait of Countess Elizabeth Bathory.

"Please, 'ave a seat." Polina said while lounging on one of the couches. Gru sat down across from her. His blue eyes were immediately drawn to the chandelier.

"I see you are admiring my candelabrum. I am a frequenter of ze theatre. I had a friend acquire it for me…it was ze very one used in ze first performance of Ze Phantom of Ze Opera."

"That ees very unsettling up dere." Gru said. She ignored this.

"Doug?" She called to her henchman, who stepped into the room, eclipsing the doorway as he did.

"Get me and Mr. Gru some Champaign. Ze good stuff." She smiled at Gru. "I have an excellent wine cellar, remind me to show you before you go today."

"I have a pretty impressive collection of wines myself…" He said while crossing his leg and resting his slender hands on his knees.

"Really, what is your finest brew?"

"Well, I 'ave a sealed bottle of Chateau Margaux."

"You have good taste. You are in for a treat wiz zis wine. It was made in a remote vineyard in France. Ze grapes are crushed by gypsy orphans. Their feet are compressed from birth so zey are very little and get get ze nectar very fine." Gru raised his eyebrows.

"Er…that is…impressive. Perhaps we should go into your plan a leetle more."

"I am still waiting for a report from my contact in China, zen we can get down to business…until zen perhaps you can tell me about your moon heist…I have been very eager to hear about it." She said while resting her chin in her finely painted hand and smiling at him.

XXX

Meanwhile, at Gru's house, Ady had crawled up on top of the Crocodile couch, on account of the furry thing with razor sharp teeth that was trying to chew her leg off.

"What the hell is this thing?" She said as Kyle snapped at her. They had been coloring when it lumbered into the room and then, after setting its beady eyes on her, lunged at her with spittle dripping from its jowls.

"Its just Kyle." Edith said amusedly. Up until that point she had been bored stiff.

"He's our dog." Margo responded. "Down Kyle, she's a guest." She said while grabbing him.

"That's a dog?" Ady said while Margo pulled him away from the couch.

"Kind of…we're not sure what species…he's a little…nervous around strangers. Hold on, I'll put him in dad's room." She said while picking him up. Ady watched, mystified as the monster calmed down a little in her grip. After the eldest girl left she came down from the couch slowly and straightened out her hoodie with a sigh.

She felt someone tugging on her pant leg and looked down at Agnes who was gazing up at her with wide eyes.

"You stepped on my crayons." Ady looked down at the crayon halves on the ground. In her desperation to get away from the 'dog' she had crushed most of them.

"Oh…sorry…" She said. Agnes picked one up and looked at it sadly.

"Aw this is my favorite color." She said while picking up the sky blue crayon, her eyes tearing up a little.

"No no, don't cry. Hold on." She grabbed at her bag lying on the floor by the couch and searched through it briefly until she found what she was looking for.

"Look, I've got markers." She said while pulling out a small handful of prisma color markers. She'd had them in her bag for a month or so. She used to take them to her old job to mark her books. "Here's a blue one. You can have them." Agnes took the markers and eyed them curiously.

"Can we watch tv?" Edith asked as Ady started cleaning up the crayon remnants.

"Sure, I guess…" Ady shoved the crayon remnants in her bag without thinking and looked around the room briefly before spotting the remote. There were a lot of buttons, most of them without symbols; the ones that actually had writing on them were foreign to her. She eyed it briefly and then looked at the tv. She shrugged and decided to try a button at random. The screen flashed on revealing a large elderly man in goggles. Behind him were various weapons and tubes. He was holding a screwdriver and was working on a foreign mechanism with a glowing tube in it. Ady raised her eyebrow and eyed the remote again.

"What's this?" When she spoke the man looked up and jumped slightly.

"Hey! Who are you? Only Gru is allowed to use this channel." Ady looked up again quickly. The old man appeared to be looking right at her.

"You…are you talking to me?" Ady asked.

"Well I don't see anyone else now do I." He said irately.

"Hi uncle Nefario." Agnes said while waving her hand. Ady looked sideways at her.

"Girls, you know you're not supposed to be playing with the video phone."

"We didn't do it, it was her." Edith said while pointing at Ady. Ady blinked and then gave Edith an aggravated look. In the mean time Margo had returned. She eyed the screen.

"Well I don't care who did it, turn it off and keep her away from it."

"Sorry uncle Nefario, it won't happen again." Margo said while she stretched her hand out to Ady who pointed at the screen and gave Margo a questioning look before handing her the remote. Margo pushed the button and the screen went dark.

"We're not supposed to touch that." She said.

"Who the hell was that guy?"

"That's Uncle Nefario."

"Uncle Nefario…"

"He works for dad."

"Of course he does." Ady said. "Okay, no TV." She said while eyeing her cell phone to check on the time. "He said Nine or ten didn't he…it's only six o' clock…unbelievable."

"I'm hungry." Edith said.

"Okay…when do you guys usually eat dinner?"

"Whenever dad makes it." Margo said with a shrug.

"Oh yeah? He cooks too? What does he make it out of, the people that accidentally walk into your fence?" The girls looked at her, puzzled and it occurred to Ady that this was probably not the way you were supposed to talk to children.

"…can we have pizza?" Edith asked after a moment.

"No…nothing that requires someone coming to the door." Ady said. "Come on, there has to be something here that I can make." She said while heading back toward the kitchen. When they got there Edith and Agnes climbed up into the booth and eyed Ady as she went to the fridge. Margo followed her.

Ady paused when she was about to open the fridge and eyed the girls.

"There's nothing horrible in here is there?"

"It's a fridge." Edith said scathingly. Ady rasied her eyebrow.

"Just making sure." She said before opening it. The contents were fairly standard if not a bit extravagant. After eying the contents Ady bit her lip. "Oh boy…I really need to learn how to cook. What are these? Ostrich feet? Yuck" She said while removing a package and raising her brow. She eyed Margo who shrugged.

"There's a cook book in the top cabinet." She said while pointing. Ady opened it after a moment of hesitation and grabbed at a couple of books. The first one was a large leather-bound volume with gold writing.

"Undetectable poisons in gourmet meals." She read. She flinched a little before setting it aside. "I'm guessing this isn't the one you were talking about." She opened up the second book and read through the table of contents briefly. "I don't think this is going to help me." She searched through the fridge again and grabbed at something.

"Duck eggs? Can you make them like regular eggs?" Margo shrugged. Ady opened the carton briefly and eyed them. "I think I can do something with this." She said

XXX

"This looks gross." Edith said while eyeing the egg. Ady had found some coffee mugs by an espresso machine that looked like it could have doubled as a torture device and had cracked the duck eggs into them, she'd thrown the mugs into the microwave afterwards for a couple minutes each.

"I know, they taste better then they look." She said. "I used to do this all the time when I was a kid." Edith poked at hers.

"Why is it so spongy?"

"It's just like scrambled eggs. Only made in the microwave…in cups. Uh…I'll be right back. I left my bag in the other room." She said before heading towards the living room.

Edith stuck her fork in the egg and pulled it out. The whole thing came out still shaped like the mug. She eyed Margo while indicating the egg bitterly.

"Edith stop it, it's not that bad." Margo said after taking a few bites. "At least its better then the food at Miss Hatties." She added. Edith let the egg drop back into the cup with a squish.

"How often do you think dad is going to be gone?" She asked. Margo frowned.

"I don't know…" She said a little uneasily.

"I hope it's not too often. I don't want to have cup eggs every night."

"I like her." Agnes said happily while she picked at her own eggs.

"You like everyone Agnes." Edith said while resting her chin in her palm.

XXX

A couple hours later Margo informed Ady that 8:00 was usually their bedtime, much to Edith's annoyance. After they got into their pjs, the young woman followed them up to their room by way of a set of dangerous looking spiral stairs and past a large family tree filled with glaring people and a framed image of various kinds of poison oak. When they got into the room she eyed it with a frown as the girls climbed into their beds.

Apart from the giant jar of worrying liquid and the paintings which Ady recognized, with some dismay as works of art which she vaguely remembered were reported stolen on the news a few years prior the room looked like a pretty standard kids room. Well, apart from the beds themselves.

"Are those…are those bombs?" She asked while leaning over to get a better look. Edith grinned.

"Yeah, if I shake mine enough it might blow up!" She said while grabbing the sides and shaking it vigorously. Ady grabbed her arms.

"Please don't do that." She said.

"She's just kidding. Dad deactivated them. They aren't going to blow up." Margo said while adjusting her pillow. Edith stuck her tongue out at her older sister.

"Will you read us a story? Daddy usually reads us a story." Agnes asked. Ady opened her mouth to say something sarcastic but bit her comment back at the last moment and instead eyed the tiny bookshelf that the little girl was pointing to. After a moment she pulled a battered and slightly homemade book from it and eyed it curiously. It was only for a second however, because the blonde girl snatched it out of her hand.

"Not that one!" She said while tucking it in her blanket. Ady looked at her, surprised.

"Only dad can read us that one." Margo said when Ady gave her a questioning look.

"Okay…no problem." She said bewilderedly while pulling out another book.

XXX

After the girls went to bed Ady spent the rest of the evening sitting on the couch and periodically eyeing her cell phone. She figured that if she stayed put the chances of running into something unpleasant were less likely. She had considered doing the dishes but had thought better of it. It was only a small evil but she got some pleasure out of the thought of that psycho having to scrape egg remnants out of his coffee mugs.

When she heard the door unlock her stomach did a somersault. She took a deep breath and stood up, hoping that she looked less uneasy then she felt. When Gru entered the house he eyed her with indifference.

"Well you are still in one pece, that is more than I expected." He said. Ady perceived, with some relief that whatever apprehension she had been feeling seemed to dissipate when she saw him and was instead replaced with anger. Anger was good…she could deal with anger. She headed over to the door and confronted the Russian man angrily.

"Turn off your damn fence and let me go." She said through her teeth. Gru leaned against the still open door with an evil grin and crossed his arms.

"I turned it off when I left. Otherwise I would not have gotten my mail." Ady stared at him, for a moment overcome with a dizzying hatred. Finally, without a word she stepped out of the door into the night air and headed towards her car.

"Hold on." She stopped, her eye flickering madly for a second as Gru stepped back outside reaching into his coat. She turned slowly and watched with some bemusement as he pulled out a silver money clip with a G on it and counted out a few bills. He handed her the money. She took it numbly and stared at it as if she expected for it to turn into a scorpion or something.

"If anything happened to my gurls while you were here you will be very sorry otherwise I will be expecting you tomorrow at de same time." Gru said while turning. Ady stared at his back for a moment. She could feel something snapping inside her head.

"You have got to be kidding me." She said. He turned curiously. "I'm not coming back here. I don't care if you shoot me or freeze me or whatever the hell it is you do. I spent the whole day thinking that if I left your yard I'd be vaporized! I will never set foot on your property again!" She said her voice getting exponentially louder as she spoke.

"Technically…I said you would be electrocuted…not vaporized…there ees a difference." Gru said.

"I don't care! You…you leave me alone!" She said angrily. Gru sighed and approached her again, folding his hands behind his back as he did. She recoiled a little.

"Well, I could force you too…" He said while shrugging his broad shoulders. "But I am very tired right now, so how about another dollar an hour?" Ady stared at him in disbelief.

"What…does that…no…why…!" She stammered angrily as the color rose to her face. Normally being flushed embarrassed her because it made her freckles stand out like the pox but she was not the least bit concerned with this at the moment. "I don't care if you offer me a hundred dollars an hour!" She said finally when her mind allowed her to form a full sentence.

"A hundred dollars would be completely reediculous. I would be willing to go up to twelve dollars…or if you like, I could turn thee fence back on…" Ady gaped at him for a few minutes before sighing wearily. At the moment, what she wanted above all else was to leave for the evening, go home, get a drink and go to bed. She straightened and glared at him.

"Fifteen dollars an hour…"

"Fifteen…?"

"And…" She interrupted vehemently. "We are going to lay some ground rules."

"You are really in no position to be bargaining with me." He said.

"Rule number one…" She said, ignoring him. "You will not point any guns at me. Rule number two: you will lock that thing…that 'dog' up before I get here" She said, while making the finger quotes angrily. "And rule number three: You will not call me at my house, you will not visit my house…in fact I never ever EVER want to see you outside of this business arrangement!"

"I will give you thirteen dollars an hour."

"Fine. But the rules are not negotiable." She said. Gru raised his eyebrow.

"All right, it is still easier than finding another babysitter." He said as he put his hand out. Ady eyed it and then glared at him once more before turning back towards her car. Gru lowered his hand and shook his head before he headed back towards the house. Negotiating with a babysitter. Maybe Perkins was right…maybe he was going soft. But then…he really really didn't want to call his mom.

XXX

Hurray, chapter four is done! Hopefully it turned out all right.

Smilethourheartisachin: Thank you, I'm glad you like it. And thank you for the well wishes. I am feeling much better, although I'll be getting a root canal in two days so we shall see how long that lasts. Hopefully the update was satisfactory. : )

I think I got everyone else in personal replies, but if not thank you so much for the reviews. Have a good day!

.


	5. Spray Tan, Stretch Pants Wearing Hell

Chapter 5:

Spray Tan, Stretch Pants Wearing Hell

Ady threw her closet open and eyed the contents for a moment before sighing and grabbing a worn pair of jeans that were draped over a chair by the window. After putting them on and grabbing her shoes she headed out to the living room. Dillon was sitting at the table eating chicken out of a can, his greasy hair falling in his eyes.

"Where are you going?" He asked while she stumbled into the room, not bothering to sit down while she put on her shoes.

"Babysitting." She responded.

"I can't believe you're still doing that." He said shaking his head.

"It's only been a week, Dillon."

"Still, you and kids. It freaks me out. I mean, didn't you write that thesis back in college about how the American family is dead and how kids are basically all spoiled brats and parents suck these days." She gave him a slightly piqued look.

"I think I worded it more elegantly then that. I get paid twice as much as when I worked at the coffee shop."

"Well I can't imagine a worse form of hell." He said as he finished up the chicken and threw the can in the garbage.

"Really? You can't? That's kind of sad. Hey, if you want to talk about hell, you should meet the guy I'm working for." Ady said bitterly. "Are you going to need your car today?"

"Yeah, I have to go down to the record shop, we're doing inventory."

"That place actually gets enough business so that you have to do an inventory?"

"Well we were supposed to last month but me and my boss went out to get drunk instead." Ady sighed

"Do you think you could drop me off?"

"I still need to take a shower. Just take a cab." He said as he stood. Ady frowned and fished her phone out of her pocket.

"All right, fine, but could you at least pick me up? It should be after your shift and I think it's on your way back anyways."

"I dunno Ads. Children weird me out…" He said while stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"It'll be at ten o' clock. They'll be in bed. Come on, I don't want to pay for two cabs. What with my car being a hulk of wreckage I need to save some money." Ady said.

"All right." He said with a sigh.

"Thank you. I'll write down the address. Please don't forget." She added as she gave him a quick kiss on the side of the mouth.

"You know you really should try to get a hold of a security tape or something and find out who ran into you. They keep those on a lot of parking lots. I got busted once for a hit and run charge because of that." He said before heading towards the shower.

"That's…actually a good idea." She said as she flipped her phone open to call a cab. "And take off my jeans!" She added.

XXX

After her first day of babysitting, which had been a nightmare, things hadn't really gotten too much easier. It seemed like every time Ady thought she was getting a handle on things something surprising or upsetting would happen.

On the second day, for example, on her way into the living room while the girls were having lunch Ady ran into an exceptionally weird looking creature. It looked vaguely like a little yellow bean with goggles and overalls. It was so bizarre looking that at first Ady didn't want to call attention to it in case she had somehow lost her mind due to stress or something and was just seeing things. However, when it spoke to her, babbling in some language she couldn't understand she finally called on the girls who told her that it was their father's cousin. It was an obvious, blatant lie, but she figured the truth would just upset her so she let it go and spent the rest of the day convincing herself that she hadn't seen it at all.

Then there was the issue with the pizza boy. On the third or fourth day she'd called out for pizza only to be hung up on by three different pizza places in the area when she gave them the address. When she tried to convince the girls to eat something else the blonde one sulked and the little one started to hold her breath. Finally she called one of the places back and bribed the delivery boy, who agreed to drop the pizza off if and only if she met him across the street. It had cost her three times what a pizza would normally cost.

The girls themselves weren't too bad. They didn't seem all that different from normal kids, not that Ady had much experience in the matter. The youngest one had an attention span of about seven seconds and was very friendly. She actually seemed to like her, which Ady found a bit bewildering. She wasn't sure she had given her a reason to but the little girl constantly insisted on showing Ady her toys and trying to play with her. It was actually a little disquieting. Her giant innocent eyes made Ady nervous.

The oldest one was surprisingly mature for her age, but could be, at times a bit of a smart alec and half of the time her sisters listened to her instead of Ady, which was admittedly slightly irksome. Then again, because she didn't really know what to do with children and the girl; Margo seemed to actually be pretty good with her sisters, for the most part Ady just went with it.

The blonde one on the other hand was a total brat. Actually…she reminded her a little of herself at that age.

On the positive side the scary Russian man had at least kept his word so far. He locked the 'dog' up before she got there, he had yet to point any more guns at her or threaten her life again in the last week and best of all she only had to see him a few minutes before he left and when he returned. Until then, things were all right as long as she stayed away from anything that was flashing or had sharp edges and made sure the kids survived the evening.

Ady got into the cab fifteen minutes after she called, making sure to leave a note for Dillon on the inside of the front door where he'd be sure to see it and headed off towards Gru's house, wondering vaguely what the day would hold.

XXX

Margo sighed as she eyed a Rebel Dolls calendar sitting by her bed. Her and her sisters had gone to their room to get dressed so that they would be ready when the babysitter got there. They had ballet practice today.

Margo was already dressed. Agnes was battling with her own tutu and Edith was digging through her drawer and occasionally tossing stuff behind her back onto the floor in search of hers.

After pulling her red converses on, Margo grabbed her glasses, her eyes returning to the calendar briefly. There was a tiny circle around the box for tomorrow. She frowned a little before biting her lip and heading towards the door, pausing long enough to fix the tangled strap that Agnes had been struggling with.

Margo found her father in the living room sitting on the couch with the shrink ray propped up against his knee and a bundle of papers, which displayed Nefario's weapon designs spread across his lap. He was eyeing a page carefully with his thick eyebrows creased. He looked tired. Dr. Nefario was on the Tv screen in front of him.

A week had gone by since he had started meeting with the strange woman they'd seen at the bank. After the second or third day Margo had begun to grow uneasy. At first she'd tried to dismiss her concerns but as the week went on she noticed that he had grown more and more absorbed in whatever it was they were doing. When he wasn't out meeting with the scary lady he was down in the lab with Dr. Nefario. In the few cases when he was with them he seemed tired and distracted. On this particular morning he had made them breakfast but had burnt the last of the pancakes horribly and then had grumbled at length about having to scrape out his good mugs when he found out that they were out of eggs. They'd wound up having cereal instead.

"I don't understand your hand writing here," Gru said. "Why does thee gun look like thees?" he asked while holding up the page for the doctor to see.

"Well you said you wanted a spay gun, so those paddles are for…"

"I said I wanted a ray gun. RAY gun." Gru said before rubbing at his eyes. "Why would I need…I don't even…what does this even do?"

"Oh…well…you probably don't want to know." The doctor said before clearing his throat. "I'll get right on that…sorry."

"Just…go away." Gru said while waving at him. The screen went black. Margo walked up to him.

"Hi dad." She said as she sat next to him on the couch.

"Heello Margo." He said as he ripped up the plans for the doctors 'spay' gun.

"What are you doing with that thing? I thought it didn't work." She said while nodding at the shrink ray.

"Miss Molyneux requested to see it. Eet works, thee effects are just not permanent. Are your seestors getting dressed?"

"Yeah. Um, hey dad. Are you…are you going to be around tomorrow?" Margo asked with a hint of awkwardness.

"Tomorrow I will probably be beesy. Why?" He said as he began to roll the other papers up carefully.

"Oh, no reason…I was just…wondering." She said. She sounded dismal enough so that Gru looked up at her.

"Eet will not be for much longer, Margo." He said, tying the pages together and setting them aside. "Once thee details are worked out I will 'ave more time to spend with you gurls."

"Yeah, great." She said while resting her chin in her hand.

Gru frowned and eyed the shrink ray briefly, before returning his eyes to his daughter.

"Would you like to try thee shrink ray?" He asked after a moment. Margo looked up.

"That's okay." She said. He grinned at her.

"You really are not much like your seestor. Come on, eet will be fun."

"Uhh, isn't it a little heavy?"

"No problemo." He said before pulling her up onto his lap and hoisting the shrink ray up in front of her. "I will hold it for you, just tell where to turn it." She smiled a little.

"What should I shrink?" She asked.

"Whatever you want, just try not to heet anything we are going to need in thee next couple of days." He added as she grabbed the handle of the shrink ray.

"Well right now were pointing it at the tv so…to the left." She said

Gru moved it over. After aiming for a moment, Margo pulled the trigger. The iron maiden shrank to doll size and after a moment of suspension in the air fell to the carpet with the tiny jingle of chains.

"Nice shot. Now weeth thee next one…" He was interrupted when the tv screen flashed on again, Dr. Nefario's face an inch from the monitor.

"Gru, I need to see you down in the lab for a few minutes before you leave. I'm having a bit of trouble with that dart gun I've been working on. Dave accidentally shot Steve and the antidote is still in experimental stages."

"What will happen if thee antidote does not work?"

"Uhh, maybe you'd better just come down here." Gru frowned.

"All right. I'll be down een a moment." He said with a sigh as he leaned the shrink ray against the couch. Margo slid off of his lap and watched sullenly as he stood and headed towards the rhino chair in the hall. "Go make sure your seestors are ready Margo."

XXX

"Why is he torning purple?" Gru asked while indicating Steve.

"Well the darts have a poison in them not unlike the kind you find in some of your more dangerous spiders and snakes, so the purple color is expected and he'll most likely swell up. It will be very painful." He said while loading a tube of clear liquid into an injection gun. "Well, best way to see if something works properly I always thought." The doctor said before injecting Steve.

"Maybe you'd better keep that gun up somewhere." Gru said, although he was more thinking about the girls then he was his minions, not that he particularly wanted any of them to swell up and turn purple either.

"Hmm…no change so far…some delay is expected no doubt…" The doctor said while eyeing the injection gun. Gru raised his eybrow. Finally the purple color seemed to start to ebb off. "Oh, there we go. Good, I was worried I'd have to go back to the drawing board." He said jovially. Gru sighed and turned back towards the lift.

XXX

Margo opened the door for Ady when she got there. Her sister's were behind her. Ady eyed their tutus briefly before raising her eyebrow.

"Why are you dressed like that?" She asked uncomfortably and with a feeling of impending doom.

"We have ballet practice today." Margo said while moving out of the way so Ady could enter the house.

"Ballet…no one said anything about ballet." Ady said, pronouncing the word in the same way someone might say 'snakes.'

"We have practice every thursday." Edith said while leaning against the wall and crossing her arms.

"Well do you _have_ to go this week?" Ady asked while eyeing the retreating cab out of the corner of her eye.

"They meesed thee last one." Gru said as he entered the hall from the living room, which unseen from the door had just lowered back into place after his trip to the lab. He headed towards the door, the sheaf of papers tucked under one arm and the shrink ray balanced on his shoulder. "We had a minor problem weeth some lasers and a rocket launcher. You will 'ave to take them." Ady's eyes were fixed on the shrink ray as he said all of this. She blinked as he kicked the door open a little more so he could get through it and followed him out, trying to ignore the comment about lasers and a rocket launcher.

"I don't have a ride. I took a cab here." She said as he headed towards the tank.

"That…ees not my problem." He replied as he set the shrink ray on one of the seats and then climbed in after it. "Just make sure they get there on time. Goodbye gurls, 'ave fun." He called back to Margo Edith and Agnes before slamming the door in Ady's face.

She sighed and headed back to the house.

"Where is your ballet practice?" She asked wearily as she pulled out her cell phone.

"It's at the dance studio." Agnes said happily, while bouncing a little in her tutu.

"Uh huh, okay, well where's the dance studio?" Ady said patiently.

"It's downtown." Margo said. "What are you doing?"

"I'm calling a cab." She said with a sigh. Margo eyed the other girls briefly.

"We could just walk." She said with a shrug.

"If it's downtown that's at least fifteen miles." Ady said.

"We used to walk all the time." She said. "Everywhere."

"What, by yourselves?" She asked while looking up.

"Uh huh." Ady stared at her for a moment before shaking her head.

"You're not walking, would you know the building if you saw it?"

"I guess."

"Okay then…who the hell lets three little girls walk fifteen miles by themselves?" She added below her breath.

XXX

Gru unraveled the pages on an ivory table in front of Polina while she examined the shrink ray while lounging on her couch. She was wearing a pair of vaguely striped fur gloves, which were in fact made from the hide of a 'Sumatran Rabbit', which was a creature so rare that it didn't actually have a real name and had only been seen twice in the last century. It was thought to be extinct…possibly even because of the gloves.

"How fascinating. Zis could be very useful." She said as she turned it over "Have you and ze doctor figured out how it works?"

"I haven't really looked at it since thee moon thing." He admitted as he straightened and folded his hands behind his back.

"Shame."

"We found out thee hard way that things do not stay shrunk for long. Thee beeger the object, thee quicker it returns to normal size. Doctor Nefario calls it thee 'Nefario' principle. It ees basically useless." Polina smiled.

"Zere is a great flaw in your thinking, Gru. But it is for zis reason I hired you." Gru raised his eyebrow then he shrugged.

"What flaw?" He asked, slightly annoyed. "What good ees a shrink ray that only shrinks things for a leetle while?"

"You are thinking too big. Ze first thing you do when you get ze shrink ray is to steal ze moon. Very ambitious, but unfortunately, due to an unforeseen calculation impossible."

"Well, I would not say impossible…I mean I deed 'ave it…jus' not for long."

"Right, but it es now obvious that stealing very large sings with zis is out of ze question. But think a little smaller. Imagine how easy it would be to steal say Anubis or ze Rosetta stone if you could shrink it down enough to fit into your pocket." She said before giving him a sly smile.

Gru eyed the shrink ray bitterly, torn between his distaste in using it merely for transportation ease and his annoyance at having not thought of it himself.

"I suppose…it would make things easier." He admitted grudgingly. "What are _we_ going to use it for? I doubt Anubis or thee Rosetta stone will help you take over thee world." She smiled at him and then motioned at Doug, who was standing off to one side. Gru had noticed that whenever he was there Doug always seemed to place himself just slightly out of vision. He was either tucked into a corner or standing somewhere behind him. It kind of freaked him out.

The big man handed her a document.

"Now zat we have made some progress on ze weaponry," She said while nodding towards the doctor's plans. "We may as well move into ze next phase of ze plan." She handed him the page. Gru eyed it briefly.

"Thee President of Brazeel, Japanese Prime Meenister, Chief Executive of a Telemex in Mexico, King of Saudi Arabia, thee President of France…thee Pope? What ees thees?" He asked while eyeing the other names on the list.

"Zese are some of the most important men in ze world right now. Zey are currently having ze most influence in politics, religion and business. We are going to kidnap zem."

"The creators of Google?" Gru asked doubtfully.

"I have done a lot of research on zis. Believe me. Your shrink ray will make it considerably easier. Now I have contacts zat are in ze general proximity of most of zese men, but there are some who will prove more difficult, which brings me to what we will be doing tomorrow evening."

"What is dat?" He asked, still staring at the list.

"Ze President of France will be at a benefit with ze Prime Minister of Russia and ze Prime Minister of Britain in Mongolia tomorrow evening. Zis is lucky for us. We'll go and see if we can't hit three birds wis one stone." She said. In the mean time she had moved over to the weapon plans he had brought and was going through them carefully.

"Will it be difficult to get een?"

"I already 'ave an invitation as a matter of fact. It pays to be friendly wis important men. You can accompany me as my escort." She said. She paused halfway through the stack of papers and pulled one out curiously. There was a brief flicker of incomprehension in her façade before she flipped the page around so that Gru could see it and gave him a questioning look.

He frowned. Somehow he had accidentally rolled up a page of Agne's drawing into the sheaf of paper before tying it up. It was covered mostly in unicorns, but there were some kittens and flowers too. She'd used lots of colors and had even drawn an arrow pointing to one unicorn and wrote 'Daddie' over it. He cleared his throat and took the page from her.

"Dat…ees not part of thee…weapon designs." He said before tucking it into his coat. "I'm not sure how it got in dere." He added embarrassingly.

XXX

Ady stood in the door of the dance studio frowning while the girls headed over to the swarm of pink children after handing her their bags. She looked over at a cushioned bench where a group of mothers were sitting and her upper lip flickered briefly.

"Oh god, I'm in spray tan, stretch pants wearing hell." She said below her breath, before moving out of the way of the door towards them. She chose to remain standing a few feet away from a woman who was chatting on her cell phone. A lot of the women looked vaguely like soccer moms but there were a few businesswomen too. Ady shivered vaguely. When the coffee shop had been busier she'd gotten a lot of soccer moms and a lot of businesswomen who would come in and chat with each other while their kids ran amuck. Somehow motherhood seemed to give women the ability to tune out noise, but to Ady those days had been exercises in mind snapping frustration. Then there were the mothers that just ignored their kids all together while they grabbed at things and made messes, which was bad enough except that most of them never cleaned up after them. Smacking the kids had probably been out of the question but Ady had had to try really hard to resist the urge to slap the mothers.

After a while she sighed heavily and leaned back against the wall as shewatched all of the little girls stumbling and stretching in their tutus.. The woman beside her closed her cell phone and put it in her purse. She looked sideways at Ady and smiled at her.

"That's my daughter." She said while nodding towards a puffy girl with dark curls who was trying to do a plie.

"Uh…great. She's uh…she's good." Ady said awkwardly while inching away from the woman a little.

"Thanks, I've got her practicing at home now so she'll be ready for the performance at the end of the month. Will you be coming?"

"I doubt it." Ady said as she watched the children dismally.

"Oh, well what a shame. They only have three every summer you know. Oh well, I know how busy schedules get. It's all I can do to get off work to drive her up here. God knows her father doesn't help. Which one is yours?" She asked while nodding towards the children.

"What? Oh, I'm with those three." She said while vaguely motioning towards Margo, Edith and Agnes in time for Edith to elbow past the woman's daughter, causing her to lose her balance. Luckily, the woman apparently missed this.

"Oh." The woman's smile faded a little as she thought about this. "Don't they usually come with their father?"

"Do they?" Ady asked while yawning a little. She really couldn't see the sinister Russian man sitting with these women. Perhaps he didn't, maybe he just dumped them off for a while, hell, and maybe that's why they were in ballet at all. Her mother had started sending her to day care when she was young so she'd be out of the way whenever she had a new boyfriend.

"So…you're their mother then? Some of us were wondering." The woman said, cutting through Ady's thoughts. Her smile had returned along with a curious glint in her eye. Ady's eyes widened a little. She turned her head stiffly.

"No…I…" She started.

"You know you're not what I would've expected. Not saying anything against you of course…or him, obviously. I mean his appearance _is_ a little garish but there's something to be said about a man who'll sit in on ballet lessons for his daughters and he does dress nice…"

"I'm their babysitter!" Ady said loudly enough so that other people around them looked up curiously. The woman looked up at her, surprised slightly at the outburst.

"Oh…I'm sorry." She said as Ady moved even further away from her. She ignored the woman for the rest of the ballet lesson.

After the girls finished Ady exited the dance studio with relief. She started searching through her bag while the girls' bags hung on one of her other arm. She scraped out what money she had left with a sigh.

"I don't have enough for another cab." She said. "We're going to have to find a bus stop. Come on there's a map over there." She added before heading over toward the map stand near the street and examining it.

"Ugh, I hate buses." Edith said. Margo remained silent; she had seemed slightly preoccupied for most of the day and because of it had been pretty bad during ballet practice.

"Closest bus stop is two blocks over." Ady said while motioning toward the right. She felt a vague tug on her pant leg.

"My feet are tired from dancing." Agnes said, wide eyed.

"Its only two blocks Agnes." Margo said from behind her.

"But I jumped extra lots today." She said miserably.

"All right." Ady said wearily before unshouldering one of the bags and handing it to Margo who took it without comment. "You can ride on my shoulders but don't move around a lot or try anything cute like covering my eyes or anything like that."

"Kay. Can I pretend you're a unicorn and that we're flying to a magic place made of gummy bears?" Agnes said. Ady raised her eyebrow.

"Sure, knock yourself out, kid." She said before hoisting Agnes onto her shoulders.

XXX

After they got to the bus stop it took them a full hour before they were able to catch a bus that headed anywhere near the girls' neighborhood. During that time Margo had sat on the bench at the bus stop quietly while Edith climbed on things and occasionally jumped in puddles and swung on stuff. After a while Ady gave up telling her to stop and just sat there with her chin in her palm, muttering about a growing headache while Agnes sat in between her and Margo humming to a tune in her head. By the time they actually did catch the bus it was early evening and after getting off at the right stop and then walking the extra block to their neighborhood the sun was going down.

Ady pushed the door open, pausing while the girls headed in.

"I'm hungry." Edith said. Ady had been banned from making any more cup eggs and therefore had been mostly ordering out for the last week or so. She really really needed to learn how to cook.

On this night they'd wound up having food from some Middle Eastern restaurant because that was the only place that Ady could find who would deliver cheap food and who didn't hang up on her when she told them where they were. It was pretty awful and she would up throwing most of it away.

She got the girls to bed a little later then usual after a dinner of various complaints in which the girls picked at their food, removing anything they didn't recognize. She went through a bedtime story quickly. It was about some puppy who was trying to find its mother and who went to various animals thinking that they gave birth to it. Ady thought this both displayed the stupidity of animals as well as doubling as an allegory for childhood abandonment…but she imagined the writer probably had other inspiration in mind.

Afterwards Ady trudged into the living room and collapsed on Gru's weird Crocodile couch. She must have dozed off because the next thing she knew, she was being jostled awake by him. She shouted and nearly fell off, mainly as a result of seeing the man in the meager light with the giant gun reasting by his side.

"Don't…do that." She said as she sat up.

"I could 'ave been a lot more unpleasant about eet." He said in tones that inferred that he really would have liked to be. He pulled out his money clip and began counting out her pay. "Deed thee ballet clauss go well?" He asked as he counted.

"Peachy." She said bitterly as she pulled out her cell phone. It was 10:30. She groaned inwardly. "I'm guessing that there wasn't an emo guy wearing girl jeans outside when you drove up?" She asked bitterly. He raised his eyebrow as he handed her the money.

"Eef there had been, I probably would have run over him." He said. "I will need you to come a leetle earlier tomorrow. Around ten o' clock." Ady sighed.

"Fine, whatever." She said as she headed towards the front door, dialing the number for the cab service for the third time that day.

XXX

Margo was lying in her bed, staring at the ceiling. After a moment she heard a rustling coming from Edith's bed.

"What do you think was in that stuff we ate tonight?" The younger girl asked.

"I don't know." Margo said.

"I've never heard of falafel before. Or shorma"

"Me neither…I think it was called Shwarma."

"They had really funny names." Agnes pitched in after squirming around in her own bed so that she could look at the other two girls.

"Do you think dad's going to keep leaving all day like this?" Edith asked.

"I don't know Edith." Margo responded with some frustration. "Go to sleep."

"Maybe he likes that scary lady more then us." Edith said, ignoring Margo. For the first time he voice sounding slightly less sardonic and there was a hint of unease.

"Nuh uh, he pinky promised he'd still spend time with us." Agnes said.

"Didn't he promise you he'd come to the ballet show too?" Agnes looked at Margo, wide eyed.

"Edith…" Margo said. "I'm sure he'll keep his promise Agnes." The little girl relaxed a little and snuggled back into her bed.

"Margo?" She asked after a moment.

"What Agnes?" Margo asked as she removed her glasses and set them aside.

"Isn't your birthday tomorrow?" The older girl was silent for a moment.

"Yeah, it is." She said before turning over and pulling her covers over her head.

XXX

Bah! Filler chapter! Sorry this took so long, but I sometimes have a hard time writing filler chapters…but this one kind of needed to get written in order to transition into the next chapter…which will not be…

As for you peoples who are wondering when the romance is going to come into this, you'll start to see a bit of that not in the next chapter but in the one after that. Ne ways hopefully this chapter turned out all right despite being largely a filler chapter. Thank you for all of your reviews!

Nana Vondy: Ha! Me too…I hate them so much -_- Glad you liked the last chapter. Thanks for the review!


	6. Ady's Bad Day

Chapter Six:

Ady's Bad Day

It was 8:00 am. Ady delivered a hard kick at Dillon's legs, which were propped up on the makeshift coffee table while he dozed on the couch. He shouted out of surprise at being so rudely awakened and then that turned into an exclamation of pain.

"What the hell was that for!" He said while rubbing at his shin.

"You were supposed to pick me up yesterday, remember! I even left you a note on the front door, where have you been all night?"

"Inventory ran on a little long and then I guess it slipped my mind and Richard asked me to come out to the club with him…" He said, still rubbing at his leg. "I think you left a bruise." He was able to dodge her next kick and scrambled off of the couch. "I'm sorry! I'll make it up. I'll drive you to and from work today!" Ady crossed her arms. "I swear. When do you leave?"

"I have to be there by ten." She said. He frowned.

"Oh man, that's really early Ads…I just got in at four…" He caught her expression. "Okay, okay don't kick me again, I'll get dressed." He said before heading towards the bedroom, giving her a wide berth as he moved past.

Ady sighed and headed into the kitchen. She moved some of the debris off of the counter until she found the yellow pages. She hadn't got a chance to call the day before to see about her car. She knew for a fact that The Coffee Shop did not have a security camera, at least a working one. Her boss had stuck some fake ones on the outside to scare away kids, but that was fairly useless against psychos with freeze guns and atomizers.

Still, there was a large retail store across the street and she would be surprised if they didn't have one on the parking lot and street.

She found the number and dialed it, hoping that they were open, or at least that someone was in at 8:00 am.

"Hey." Ady said when a half asleep voice answered. "Sorry to bother you this early, someone ran into my car last week at the coffee shop across from you guys, I was wondering if your store had a camera on the street?"

"Hold on, I'll switch you over to security." The person answered. Eventually the phone clicked and a woman greeted her. She repeated her question and waited on the line while the woman looked for the tape from other day. While she waited Dillon returned to the living room.

"Hey, I saw Vanessa yesterday. I guess she got a job over at that Hideaway Place. We should go out there some time. What are you doing?"

"Trying to figure out who ran into my car." She said. She put her hand up to Dillon when the woman on the other line started talking again.

"Hello, I found the tape, but I'm…I'm not sure I can get the license plate…I'm not even sure this is the vehicle of a private citizen."

"Oh?" Ady asked, frowning a little.

"It actually kind of looks like a tank…there is a large G on the side, hold on, I'll see if we have a better shot."

Ady's eye flickered madly for a second, then her frown turned into a look of deep weariness.

"You know what…never mind."

"Wha? Are you sure?"

"Yep, it's not going to do any good." She said while rubbing at her eyes. "Thanks though."

The woman hung up and Ady slammed the phone back into the holder.

"I hate that guy!"

XXX

Margo opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling. Before they were adopted, they had been in the orphanage for a little over three years. In that time she had never enjoyed this day. Her and her sisters usually remembered each other's birthdays and Agnes usually drew her a picture and Edith would make her a mud pie or something and they'd do the same for each other and one time she had saved up enough money to buy Agnes a small toy for hers and would occasionally sneak extra desert on those days so that it seemed at least a little bit special, but they never celebrated birthdays at Miss Hattie's.

Technically, their father should have been given the dates of their birthdays in the paperwork when he adopted them in the first place…but it was probably too much to expect that he had read it. Should she tell him? Would he care? Whatever it was that he was doing was obviously important to him…would their birthdays really matter to him?

"Margo, are you awake?" Margo looked up at Edith, who was leaning over the side of her bed.

"Uh huh."

"There's a big car parked outside the house." Margo sat up and hoisted herself out of bed before crossing to the window. She heard a vague crashing noise, which she associated with Edith rolling out of her own bed. The younger girl came up behind her.

"Look, it's the tongueless guy." Edith said. "Is dad leaving already?"

"I guess so." Margo said bitterly.

"This is stupid." Edith said as she headed back to her bed. "I'm tired of the babysitter, I want to spend time with dad."

"Yesterday he said it wasn't going to be for much longer…" She said while eyeing Edith, who crossed her arms. Margo sighed. "I want to spend time with him too." She added quietly before she started getting dressed.

"If we didn't have a babysitter, dad would have to spend time with us." Edith said innocently. Margo eyed the younger girl with suspicion

"Dad said we couldn't play with any of the weapons while we isn't here, Edith." She said. "Besides…she isn't that bad. Agnes likes her."

"Pff who needs weapons, I bet I could get rid of her without them."

"Just let it go, Edith." Margo added as she headed towards their bedroom door. Edith raised her eyebrow.

"But what about your birthday?" Margo paused.

"It doesn't matter." She said with a sigh before leaving the room. Edith crossed her arms. Well, she had never needed Margo's permission to do something before. Whether her sister agreed with her or not, she was going to get rid of the babysitter today.

XXX

"This is it." Ady said. Dillon mounted the curb across the street from Gru's house. He raised his eyebrows.

"What an eyesore." He said with a frown.

"Yeah, well, you should see the inside." She said as got out of the car. She poked her head back in the window

"Don't forget to pick me up tonight."

"I won't." He said as he adjusted the radio.

As she walked up to the house she eyed the large limo parked out front. A huge man was standing near the door patiently. He was wearing a suit of a dark color…that she couldn't help but notice seemed to have a few vague stains of an even darker and more suspicious hue. The suit itself looked as if it were about to split at the seams. He was also wearing sunglasses that looked as if they were embedded in his flesh because they were so tiny and his forehead was so massive. When he caught Ady's nervous gaze he grinned hugely, his mouth agape. Ady grimaced back from the smile and looked away.

"Yikes." She said under her breath. _Just don't look at him…its none of your business. _

She met Gru at the door. He was also wearing dark colors and sunglasses and he'd traded his gray turtleneck in for a black one. After a brief internal struggle he'd also left his black jacket behind and was currently wearing a dress cloak. His outfit was admittedly impeccable and there certainly weren't any stains of a suspicious nature or otherwise. Much of this was lost on Ady, who only noticed it because perhaps it made him look even more sinister then he had before. Of course a lot of this was because he was once again balancing the shrink ray on one shoulder.

"I weel be a leetle later tonight. Probably around eleven o' clock." He said as he headed towards Polina's limo. He halted briefly. "Oh, What was dat garbage in de fridge dat I threw out dis morning?"

"It was middle eastern food." Ady said blankly.

"Don't order dat anymore. Order peesa or something."

"I can't get any pizza places to deliver to this place without bribing them." Ady said while crossing her arms. "And that was all I could afford after paying the cab and the bus fair because some utter bastard ran into my car." He raised his eyebrow and opened his mouth to say something only to be interrupted by that odd throat clearing sound. He eyed the limo wearily.

"I'm paying you thorteen dollours an hour. No more Meedle Eastern food." He said before turning and heading down the driveway again. Ady glared at his back and closed the door.

XXX

Polina's limo dropped him off at a personal airport of hers where Gru was shown to very sleek looking plane. Gru would have preferred to take his own ship, but Polina insisted that it was too menacing and would raise suspicion.

The interior of the plane was very elegant. The seats were of leather and it was carpeted with a very fine white fur.

"It ez white fox." Polina said after he commented. "Zis is ze plane I usually use for guests…it ez not quite as elegant as some of ze ozzers, but some people get a bit funny about sitting on chairz made from ze hides of extinct animals." She rested her sharp chin in her slender hand and smiled at him. Doug was sitting off to the side. Occasionally Gru would feel the man's gaze shift over to him. He had to admit that this, coupled with the slightly sweet and spicy aroma of Polina's perfumed interior and the fact that he hadn't gotten much sleep in the last week or so was going to make for a very unpleasant plane ride. Gru crossed his leg uncomfortably and cleared his throat.

Across from him, Polina pulled out a cigarette and placed it in her holder. She held it out to her servant. Gru frowned. Add cigarette smoke to that list of grievances.

"Light, Doug." Doug blinked and pulled out a lighter. After lighting her cigarette his eyes glazed over as he checked out again until his mistress gave him her next order.

"Uh, out of curiosity, why…are all 'ove your servants er…" He started while waving his hand vaguely to indicate Doug.

"Wizzout zeir tongue?"

"Ees it some kind 'ove punishment?"

"Not at all. I cut off zeir tongues when zey start working for me. It ez a security measure."

"You would think eet would be deeficult to find someone who would be agreeing to do dat." She smiled.

"I am very persuasive. Do you not take precautions when it comes to your minions?"

"Err…well…yes…but I jus made sure no one could understand dem." Gru said while eyeing Doug again.

"Zat ez also a fine idea." She said happily as she pulled out a bottle of wine and poured herself a glass. "I did not sink of zat. Would you like a drink?" Gru held up his hand in protest. She took a sip. "I 'ave been meaning to ask, have you thought any more about what I said about boarding schools?"

"Hmm?"

"For your daughters? I sink you would find zat it would do wonders for zem. I sent my son to Moscow three years ago, he ez making great improvement. Occasionally I get letters from the school outlining his progress."

"You have a son?"

"Yes, it ez a fine villain ran boarding school, not quite as fine as ze one in swizzerland but I know ze headmaster in moscow."

"I think perhaps…" Gru started carefully. "Dey are a bit young for boarding school." He said.

"I sent my son at six…or perhaps seven…ez he nine or ten now? I cannot remember…"

"I will have to decline." Gru said quickly. "I will enroll dem een de regular school." He added before looking out the window.

XXX

When Ady walked into the living room she found all three girls sitting on the couch. Margo had her head rested in her palm, Agnes was snuggling her massive unicorn and Edith was lying on the couch, one boot on top and the other on the armrest. She eyed Ady from her upside down standpoint.

"Good morning." Ady said sullenly as she unshouldered her bag. She got a half hearted good morning in return. "We don't have any last minute engagements today do we? No dance class?"

"That's only once a week." Edith said with a scowl.

"Okay then, what do you want to do?"

"Lets play unicorns!" Agnes said happily.

"How about let's not." Edith said as she rolled over and sat up. "Why don't we play hide and seek." Agnes, who's face had fallen when Edith shot her down, brightened again. "Yeah hide and seek!"

"Uhh…I don't know if that's such a good idea in uh…this house." Ady said, while eyeing Margo out of the corner of her eye. The older girl seemed to be preoccupied with her thoughts.

"Aw, come on, we're bored." Edith said.

"Yeah, we're bored." Agnes repeated while squeezing her unicorn and eyeing Ady with her huge brown eyes. Ady sighed.

"Okay, but lets set a few…"

"Great! You're it Margo!" Edith shouted before jumping off of the couch and running off. Agnes followed suit, with a little more difficulty as she maneuvered herself off of the couch.

"Hey hold on!" Ady shouted after them. She turned back to Margo, who hadn't moved. "Are you playing?" She asked uncertainly. Margo was snapped out of her thoughts. The girl looked glum enough so that Ady felt a twinge of empathy. "I could be it instead if you like."

"No, that's okay." Margo said half-heartedly. Ady frowned but headed out of the room.

XXX

The plane landed in Ulaanbaatar where a Mongolian man greeted them in the middle of a large runway. From there they had been shown to a black car, which drove them to The Museum of Natural History where the engagement was being held.

Gru stood casually near the magnificently dressed tables and eyed the crowd nonchalantly, while occasionally adjusting his sunglasses in a way that probably seemed insignificant to those around him, apart from those people who were probably wondering why he was wearing sunglasses indoors. He was, in parts both keeping an eye on The President of France and the Prime Minister of Russia.

Polina, who had been conversing with two men in military uniform headed over to him smoothly and handed him a glass of wine.

"You see zem?" She asked quietly. He nodded as he adjusted his sunglasses again and took the wine from her.

"Eet will be difficult to get dem on dere own. Dere 'ave been men around them all afternoon."

"We will get our chance. Come, let us mingle to trow off any suspicion. Keep your eyez on zem zo." She said as she took his arm and guided him over to a small group of incredibly important and incredibly stuffy looking men. One of the men in the group had been the Mongol who had met them when they got to the capital. Apparently he worked for Polina and was keeping the Shrink Ray hidden until they needed it.

"Gru, zis ez ze Procurator of the Republic of Mongolia, ze Prime Minister of Germany, and zis is ze Prime minister's assistant Henrick, whom you've already met. Gentlmen, zis is Messier Gru."

"Ich sehe sie hat eine andere. Welch seltsame Geschmack unsere Polina hat bei Männern.." Henrick said in German. The other two men grinned impishly. Gru frowned, but said nothing and instead adjusted his sunglasses again, watching as the lenses shifted and a second later, though he was still facing the gentlemen in front of him, the glasses were focused on the two men on the other side of the room. Doctor Nefario had called them 'mirror glasses.'

"Are yoo een busyiness too, Meestor Groo?" The Procurator asked. His accent was very thick.

"Beesness? Uh, yes…een a manner of speaking." Gru replied. He had caught sight of the President of France breaking away from his group and heading down a nearby hall. "Excuse me plez." Gru said as he turned away from the men, setting the still mostly full wine glass on a nearby tray and heading towards where the President had gone. Polina nodded slightly at Henrick, who muttered a brief excuse to the Prime Minister before heading in a direction opposite of where Gru had gone.

Gru quietly weaved through the room until he got to the hall. He sighed. All of this sneaking around stuff went against his instincts. He wasn't a spy he was a villain. He would have preferred to just bring the freeze ray and kidnap the President and Prime Minister while everyone else was busy being frozen solid.

Two gentlemen in suits were standing outside the Men's restroom. Gru positioned himself so that the men could not see him and pushed his cloak back a little. He pulled out an odd looking gun and held it up to eye level to peer through the lens. He adjusted the sunglasses so that he could see behind him, in case anyone should approach.

After a moment there were two very soft whizzing noises and both men fell over lazily. Gru stored the gun once more beneath the cloak. He saw movement in the glasses and turned in time to see Henrick pushing a small table with a large cloth draped over it, of the sort one might see when ordering room service. Without acknowledging Gru's presence, he rolled the table up to the wall and left it, before heading off again.

Gru approached the table and pulled the cloth up. He grabbed the Shrink Ray from underneath, hoisted it up and took up a position where he had the door in his sight. When the President of France emerged, there was just enough time for him to register the unconscious men and his expression to change slightly before the shrinking ray hit him.

Gru chuckled and headed over to the now very small president.

"Nothing person meestor president." He said, amused, before picking the frantic man up and heading back to the catering table. He stored the Shrink ray underneath again, careful to replace the tablecloth. There was a silver tray with a lid overtop sitting on the table's surface. He removed the lid and put the tiny man inside. "Hopefully thee catering crew does not get here forst, otherwise, someone ees een for a very nasty surprise." Gru said before setting the lid back on the plate. He headed back towards the party, whistling happily.

A moment later, unseen by anyone, Henrick returned and rolled the table away.

"So?" Polina asked when Gru returned to her side.

"Dat is one down." She smiled.

XXX

Edith went straight for the windy staircase at the end of the front hall. She headed straight for her father's room and halted before throwing open the door. There was a vague growl from within.

"Come on, Kyle." She said while looking over her shoulder. The creature charged out of the door, happy to be free, but also angry from being shut up in the first place. He lunged at Edith, thought better of it and instead bounded down the hall.

Ady headed up the stairs slowly and without much motivation. When she got to the top and looked up she had a brief vision of teeth before something clamped on her ankle painfully. Ady shouted, nearly fell down the stairs, which given Gru's stairs would have been incredibly painful and possibly fatal before falling to the ground, and attempting to kick the monster off.

Kyle didn't let up, he'd found a victim that was not off limits and was enjoying it. After struggling for a while Ady managed to yank herself out of her shoe and scrambled to her feet. She ran down the hall. Kyle lingered briefly, reducing the shoe to a tangled mess of canvas and rubber, before heading after her. She ran into Gru's room, since it was the only door open and slammed it shut. She heard a vague thump as Kyle ran into it…and then another one because apparently he hadn't gotten the hint the first time.

After a moment Ady sighed and sat down on the bed without looking around. She shouted as something stuck her in the back and turned to see what it was. The headboard was covered in long spikes.

She paled a little…if she had sat down just a little closer to it she would have had a few good sized puncture wounds in her back. Why…would anyone…ever want to sleep near a bunch of spikes? What if they tossed or turned? How were the pillows not ripped to shreds? She sighed and scooted away from them. Her fingers brushed up against Gru's silk pajamas, which were draped across the bed. She eyed them cynically. It occurred to her slowly that this was a place that she did not want to be.

"Does the man really have to put Gs on everything?" She asked below her breath before standing and returning to the door. She opened it an inch and then slammed it shut again when Kyles muzzle appeared in the crack. Ady frowned. She had a brief vision of her still being stuck in her where the man returned and shuddered briefly. After a moment she took her remaining shoe off and, taking a deep breath, flung open the door and threw it forward, desperately.

"Fetch!" To her amazement the creature bounded after it. She ran down the hall back toward the stairs and headed downward, taking them two at a time. She slid in the hall on her socks and almost lost her footing. Then after looking around to make sure the monster wasn't following her headed back towards the living room at a calmer gait.

"Hey," She heard from behind her. She turned. Edith, who had headed back down the stairs while Ady was taking refuge in Gru's room, came out from her place behind the large Rhino chair. She was smiling in a way that reminded Ady very much of the girl's father. "I know a good hiding place."

Oh, _I have a really bad feeling. _Ady thought before Edith pressed a button on the side of the chair. The seat part out of it shot out. Ady's eyes widened. She was knocked off of her feet on top of it as it moved to the center of the living room. There was a long creaking noise from above. Ady looked up, as the massive cannon on the ceiling seemed to come unhinged and came rushing towards her. She clutched the sides of the chair in terror and closed her eyes tightly. After a moment of darkness she opened one to find she was in some sort of odd lift and watched, alarmed as the living room began to rise behind her and the lift began to lower. Edith moved to the edge and looked down at Ady, smiling.

Margo, who had been drawn by the noise, appeared by Edith's side. She looked at the lowering lift and then crossed her arms and gave her sister a scolding look.

"What?" Edith said innocently. "I'm playing hide and seek."

The trip down was somewhat traumatizing to say the least. She thought seeing one of those odd yellow creatures was worrying. Now she watched, mouth agape as hundreds of them ran around pipes, turned and twisted knobs and hammered nails. In one room there was a group of them doing aerobics…this was somehow more worrying then the guns or Kyle had been.

When the elevator finally rested at the bottom, Ady just stood there for a moment, frozen. A couple of the yellow creatures looked up at her and one chattered briefly in the same strange language she'd heard before.

"Er…" She eyed the lift from inside and began frantically looking for buttons that might take her back up. There was a panel on a nearby wall, Ady stepped off of the lift and headed towards it. She heard a humming sound and turned as the lift started heading back up.

"Oh no no no!" She said as she hurried back, frowning as it vanished out of sight. She turned around slowly, eyeing the creatures. One of the shorter ones turned to another beside him.

"Intraisa?" It said. Ady noted with horror as it rose what looked like a rocket launcher onto its shoulder.

"Intraisa…pff" The other said while shrugging and eyeing her. A third came up and pointed at her.

"No no Nana." Another said. The first one nodded.

"Oh…" He pulled the trigger. Luckily the aim on the thing was horrible. Ady had enough presence of mind to dive out of the way as the rocket hit a nearby wall and exploded. "Oops." The creature said while eyeing the rocket. When the spots vanished from in front of Ady's eyes she stood up and ran past the creatures, hurdling over a couple.

"Doko ni ka?" One called after her. Another shrugged and made a crazy sign near its yellow head.

Running didn't really help her. The tiny creatures were everywhere and she had no idea where she was going. Ady looked around. The place was massive, there were blinking lights and observation windows and large halls that looked almost like indoor runways and a ton of random things scattered about like fine upholstered chairs and tables with strange and dangerous looking chemicals and weapons on them.

She felt how someone might feel if they suddenly wound up in the middle of a secret military base in the middle foreign country…exactly like that actually. Frightened, out of place and surrounding by people she couldn't understand. As if to give emphasis to this sensation, off to the side were what looked like miniature versions of the statue of liberty and the Eiffel tower. She raised her eyebrow.

"Hey! What are you doing down here?" She spun around. An elderly man in a scientist coat was rolling up to her on a scooter. She recognized him from the television screen on her first day there. "You can't be down here. This is off limits."

"I didn't mean to…I don't even know what this is?" She said while indicating the massive room.

"You need to leave right now." He said while pointing back in the direction she came from.

"Well I was trying, I don't know how to work that elevator thing!" She said with frustration. She heard the humming again. The elevator was coming back down, now with Edith and Margo inside. Doctor Nefario peered around Ady and scowled at the girls.

"Hey! You're not allowed to be down here either, young ladies." He said while shaking his finger at them angrily.

"So make us leave." Edith said. Margo glared at her and stepped off of the elevator.

"We just came down to…"

"No no, don't touch that." Dr. Nefario interrupted while, behind Margo, Edith picked up a gun that was lying on a crowded table. There was a click and a small piece of metal embedded itself about an inch near Ady's foot. Ady looked down at it numbly as it made a whizzing sound, dug a half inch into the ground and then fizzled and died like faulty firecracker. A small stream of smoke rose from it. She noticed that the elderly man had abandoned his scooter and had positioned himself so that she was in the way of him and the gun. He'd moved pretty quickly for someone who looked as old he did. When he was sure he was safe he moved from behind her and grabbed the gun from the younger girl.

"If that hadn't been a dud, it would have blown us all up!" Edith eyed him owlishly. "Your dad told you to stay away from this place while he was gone!"

"Hey, she came down here first." Edith said while pointing at Ady who was still staring at the piece of metal.

"I don't care who came down her first. You all need to go. I really ought to start putting these weapons up somewhere." He added to himself. "You, do your job, you're being paid to watch them!" He said to Ady as he set the gun on a higher shelf where Edith couldn't get at it. "Get back to the lift…and from now on, stay away from here!"

A moment later they were back on the elevator. Ady was holding onto Edith's arm tightly as the girl struggled against her. Margo was standing to the side quietly.

"Let go!"

"No." Ady replied. When they got to the top Ady stepped off of the lift, pulling Edith off after her. She opened her mouth to say something, but didn't get the chance. The girl kicked her hard in the shin. Ady shouted as Edith scrambled out from her grip and ran off. Ady glared after her, rubbing her shin and then eyed Margo who frowned.

"Go find your sister and sit in the living room. No more games!" She said before she straightened and headed after Edith again. She found her in the kitchen, trying to get the chainsaw off of the wall.

"Don't touch that!" Ady said, just as it came off and crashed to the floor, it revved into life and Ady watched in horror as it chewed up a portion of the kitchen floor. Edith had jumped back and was watching it with a mixture of surprise and fascination. Ady managed to grab at the chainsaw and turned it off. She hoisted it back up on the wall and then turned her glare on Edith.

XXX

It had taken a while to find Agnes, after a frantic search, in which Ady and Margo looked for the girl, they finally found her in the closet in the girl's room. She'd craled in there to hide and had fallen asleep.

After ensuring that one of them shut Kyle back in Gru's room Ady ordered them all back into the living room and up onto the couch.

"Just sit there!" She said, looking specifically at Edith, while pointing at the couch. "I'm going to order a pizza. Don't talk, don't move, no more hide and seek, no games, just be quiet!" She said before picking up her cell phone.

"She seems mad." Agnes whispered to the other girls. Margo eyed Edith.

"I told you to leave it alone." Margo said angrily.

"What it's your birthday…you shouldn't have to spend it with a babysitter."

They heard Ady shouting and looked up as she yelled at the pizza man on the other line.

"Look, I'm not going to bribe you to come here. I want my pizza. If you're not here in twenty minutes I swear to god, I will hunt you down and make your life as miserable as mine is right now. I have no patience left…none…and if you think I'm bluffing you're going to be in for a very unpleasant surprise." She said, her voice getting lower and more menacing as she went along.

"Hey, she sounds kinda like dad when he's ordering pizza." Agnes said happily. Ady shut her cell phone and turned back to the girls who straightened innocently. She opened her mouth, possibly to shout some more, but it just so happened that it was this exact moment that the iron maiden returned to normal size, chains snapping and fell forward. There was a series of splintering noises as it crushed an end table in the process.

"Huh, that got big again fast." Margo said when the noise died down.

XXX

Later on, after the pizza had gotten there, which had not only been delivered, but was early…and had come with an extra order of breadsticks, Ady sent the girls off to bed. On her way back downstairs she collected her mutilated shoes and then stood in the living room entrance for a while, eyeing the wreckage before she headed towards the kitchen, sat down in the booth and stared at the chewed up tiles beneath the chainsaw wearily. After a moment she rested her head in her hands with a groan.

"Um." Ady looked up, half expecting to see Edith standing in the doorway with a gun or something pointed at her. It was Margo.

"Go to bed, kid." She said with a sigh. Margo ignored this and instead approached her.

"I wanted to apologize…for Edith. It wasn't personal or anything…" She added. Ady raised her converse shoes up for inspection.

"I've had these since my senior year of high school…they were my favorite shoes and the last thing my mom gave me before she moved to California. Also I almost died about three times today and when I say almost, I would remind you to keep in mind that this is a thing which will most certainly be remedied once your father gets home and sees what's been done to his kitchen and living room." She said before dropping the shoes on the floor. "But it's nice to know it wasn't personal."

After a moment she looked up at Margo and raised her eyebrow, then her expression softened a little and she sighed. The girl looked absolutely miserable.

"Don't worry about it."

"My dad's not going to kill you." Margo said…she paused briefly as if testing the truth of this in her head. "Probably…I mean the iron maiden wasn't your fault and Edith gets into his stuff all of the time."

"Yeah well, as comforting as that is, it only means that I'll have to come back tomorrow and do this again."

"If you hate kids so much then why are you babysitting?" Ady looked up at Margo, surprised.

"What makes you think I hate kids?" Margo shrugged.

"You don't seem to really know what you're doing and every time Agnes comes up to you, you treat her like she's about to explode or something." Ady sighed.

"All right, so I'm no good with kids, trust me, that's not what this is about. It isn't you guys. It's not even your sister. To be frank, I'm surprised at how well behaved you are, considering…I mean…" She paused for a moment. "He's _really_ your dad?" Margo gave her a halfhearted smile.

"We're adopted…we've only been here for a month." She replied.

"Oh…" Really that just raised more questions. Ady considered how to approach what she considered to be a fairly sensitive subject. "Is he…you know…he doesn't seem…well…I mean he seems sort of…?"

"He's really not that bad," Margo said, after eyeing her curiously. "I know what it looks like but he's a better dad then you'd think he would be." Margo said while sitting down in the booth across from her. "That's why Edith did all of that stuff today…She just misses dad."

Ady looked forward, considering this carefully.

"When I was a kid,I used to do nasty things all of the time to get rid of my mom's boyfriends. Most of them deserved it. All of the guys she dated were just…awful and she never saw it…I never understood why she wanted to be with them instead of me. My dad left when I was two…so I can't even remember him, so she was all I had, but she just kept dating the same type of guy over and over…I actually found a way to electrocute one of them once…" She added. "So…I guess I can understand." Well she could understand if she left Gru out of the variable. She honestly couldn't wrap her mind around the idea of a child seriously wanting to be anywhere near that guy…

"So are you guys really sisters then?" Ady asked after a moment of silence. "I mean, you seem pretty close, but you don't really look alike. Or did your dad just suddenly decide that he needed three kids all at once." Margo pulled her knees up to her chest.

"My dad…my real dad." Margo added quickly. "He got married to Edith's mom after him and my mom split up. Agnes and me are sisters. Edith's my stepsister. After he died, Edith's mom left us with an aunt or something. When she didn't come back we got put in the orphanage. I don't think either of them remembers that." There was a long silence, and then Margo stood.

"And you guys really are happy here?" Ady asked, uncertainly.

"Yeah. I mean…he's been gone a lot in the last week and…Well, today's kind of my birthday…I guess it would have been nice if…" Margo frowned. "We are…most of the time." She said before turned and heading back to her room. Ady watched her go. Her eyes dropped back down to her shoes and her expression hardened.

XXX

When Gru got home he was exhausted. He leaned the shrink ray against the wall and then kicked off his expensive shoes. It had been a long day. They'd succeeded in acquiring both men and him and Polina had been back in the air by the time anyone noticed the absence of the two political men, but as smoothly as it went, Gru couldn't help but feel a little uneasy. The way Polina explained things and the way she talked to him…he couldn't help but feel like she was being deliberately indistinct. She was a villain, so it was a given that he should be wary of trusting her, but while he was used to dealing with people who were treacherous in the normal dependable way, Polina was just so… manipulative and controlling and she seemed to have a way of keeping people slightly off balance, which would have been fine if she weren't trying to do it to him too.

Perhaps he just needed a good night sleep. He was deep in thought when the babysitter approached him and therefore didn't notice her expression or the fact that she was in her socks, with two horribly mangled shoes clutched in her fingers.

"I quit." She said as she walked past him and out the door. It took a second for Gru's mind to catch up.

"What? Hey, hold on, woah woah, you cannot queet." He said as he followed her out.

"Uh huh, I just did." She responded. She was vaguely relieved to see that Dillon was parked across the street. This whole thing would have been a lot harder if she'd had to call and wait for a cab.

"Why…we…we had an agreement!" Gru said.

"I don't care." Ady said.

"I, you…" Gru pulled his cloak back and drew the weapon from it. Ady watched him, and forced herself to remain composed, at least on the outside. "Re-evaluate yor deecision, or you weel suffer my wrath!"

"You know, if you shoot me, you're still out a babysitter." She said.

"Not eef I shoot you een thee leg." Much to his surprise, instead of cowering or trying to run away she walked back toward him.

"You know what, you do that, but I'm not working for you anymore. You lost me my job, you wrecked my car, you threatened me, your daughter almost blew me up today, and your dog ruined my favorite shoes…" At this she pushed the beat up converses in his arms, causing him to lose his grasp on the weapon, which fell and went off. The blast hit one of the tires on Gru's tank. After a brief pause in which both of them eyed the tank, Ady continued. "…I've nearly died more times then I can count this week and today an Iron maiden appeared out of mid air and almost fell on me, but you know what, I could almost live with all of that if it weren't for you. You are, by far the worst man I have ever met…and considering some of the guys I've known, that's a pretty big insult. If you want to run around all day, and dump your kids on strangers and miss your daughter's birthday go find someone else to be your babysitter. I'm not going to help you neglect your kids." She said before turning angrily and heading towards the car.

Gru stared at her retreating figure, but now all plans of stopping her had left him and had instead been replaced by one thought, which was currently occupying all of his attention. He eyed the shoes unconsciously before tossing them inside and heading quickly back into the house.

He paused in the opening to the living room, raising his eyebrow at the destruction before shaking his head and moving into the kitchen. He pulled open a few drawers and cabinets until, finally he found what he was looking for, it was probably a stroke of luck that he'd thrown it in a drawer instead of in the garbage. He sat down on one of the stools and balanced the papers on his knees as he searched through them. At the top of each paper were the words **Miss Hatties Home For Girls. **

He found what he was looking for on the fifth page. Gru held it up with a groan and then set the pages down on the neighboring stool. He leaned forward on the countertop and rubbed at his eyes and forehead.

"Margo." He said with a sigh.

XXX

Translation: I see she has another one. What strange taste our Polina has in men.

The language I wound up using for the minions are kind of a mishmash of Spanish and Japanese and a couple of others, mainly because some of the things they say in the film actually does sink up with a foreign language at least on occasion. (Like 'Para tu' actually does mean 'for you' in Spanish) If I'm getting it wrong, or if you guys have a better way of mimicking their language let me know. Otherwise ima just keep doing this when I need them to talk.

Whoo, finally done. I went back to school last week so I have less free time now… and actually I'm writing this on a sick day. : - / I think this is the first time I've been sick on the second week of school…kinda sux.

Now that this chapter is done I can get into some really fun stuff. (**evil smile)** You have NO idea how much fun I'm going to have with the next chapter.

Anyways, hope this turned out all right despite me being slightly groggy on medicine. Thank you for all of your reviews! Have a good day!


	7. Author's Note

Author's Note

Okay so, I originally intended to have the next chapter of this story done on Monday, but it got pretty long. So, after I got to about page fifteen I realized I probably wouldn't be able to get it done until at least tomorrow because of my schedule on Tuesday or Wednesday. Now, you may notice that I am using the past tense. Earlier today while I was in my class I made the exceptionally stupid mistake of leaving my laptop in my car, only to find when I returned that someone had smashed the driver side window open and my laptop was gone. (This was right before we were all ushered into the basement of a large building because of a tornado warning and after spending a lengthy stint of time at the dentist finishing my root canal…today has not been a good day)

The good news is, yesterday when I was about ten pages into the chapter I printed it out to mark up. So that will help with some, but I don't actually have a lot of access to a computer right now. There's a tiny tiny chance that I may still have the chapter up by tomorrow. But it's unlikely.

Anyways, I hope that you're day has gone better then mine.


	8. Margo's Plan

Chapter Seven:

Margo's Plan

After they woke up the next morning the girl's headed downstairs. Margo lingered behind and watched Agnes as she held her unicorn up to the banister and mimicked its gallop as Edith tried to jump as many stairs as she could at a time.

"Be careful Edith." She said wearily. Edith looked back at Margo and then made a point of jumping again, nearly lost her footing and then glared at Margo as if daring her to say something. Agnes looked up from her unicorn toy.

"I smell bacon." She said happily. Edith promptly forgot what it was she had been doing and followed the younger girl down the stairs.

They got to the kitchen a moment later. There was indeed bacon as well as nearly every other breakfast food imaginable. That is, those breakfast foods that were not healthy like grapefruit and could be fried, toasted or have syrup spread all over them. Gru was standing at the stove in his apron in the midst of flipping a pancake in the shape of a bomb and humming quietly to himself.

"Wow, look at all the food." Edith exclaimed.

He turned at the sound of her voice and smiled nervously as Edith hoisted herself into the booth against the wall. Agnes tried to follow her and Gru gave her a leg up when it became apparent that she was having difficulty.

"What is all of this?" Margo asked, still standing in the doorway.

"Well, I thought eet might be nice to 'ave a beeg breakfast." He said, while eyeing Margo carefully. He began setting the plates of food down on the table. Margo climbed up next to Agnes and after Gru poured himself a cup of coffee he joined them.

"Awesome, these pancakes have chocolate chips in them." Edith said as she began scooping stuff on her plate.

"What's this stuff with the powder onit?" Agnes asked as she got close enough to the aforementioned object so that a little of the powder came off on her nose.

That ees French toast." Gru said with some amusement, as he swiped his thumb across her nose. She beamed at him.

"When do you have to leave today?" Margo asked casually as she poured syrup over her pancake. She had to admit that it was a spectacular breakfast. She couldn't remember ever having another like it.

"Well, there ees a problem weeth that." He said as he took an egg and a couple pieces of bacon. "Thee babysitter quit." Margo frowned. On the other side of the table, Edith froze with her fork raised halfway to her mouth.

"Uhh, did she say why?" She asked guiltily.

"Extensively." He said darkly. "That ees not important though…I was thinking…perhaps that today…we could spend some time together." Edith brightened up, her concern about possibly getting into trouble forgotten.

"The whole day?" She asked.

"Yes, thee whole day."

"What are we going to do?" Margo asked doubtfully.

"Well, that ees up to you." He said as he gave her a worried smile. "So, feenish your breakfast and go get dressed and we will figure eet out."

Edith and Agnes exchanged an excited look and went back to their meal.

After they had had more then enough, they headed up to their room to get changed. When Margo stood to leave, Gru put his hand on her shoulder.

"Margo." She turned and gave him a questioning look. "Why didn't you tell me yesterday was your birthday?" He asked softly. Margo frowned.

"Well…you seemed busy and…I guess I didn't think you would care." She said with a shrug. Gru noticed a hint of accusation in her voice.

"Well, I may be beesy but…that does not mean that I do not think these things are important." He said uncomfortably.

"It was listed in the adoption papers." She said while rubbing at her arm and eyeing the floor.

"Thees ees true." He said with a sigh. "And I am sorry for dat." He'd spent most of the night before memorizing the rest of the papers so that it would not happen again. "Can I make eet up to you?" He asked with some concern. "Anything special you want?" Margo thought about this.

"Can I have a cake?" She asked hopefully.

"Cake? Ees dat all?" He asked. If it had been Edith she probably would have asked for something dangerous that exploded…and most likely Agnes would have asked for a unicorn or something.

"Yeah…with candles and my name on it…I've never had one."

"Ove course you can 'ave a cake." He said, a little mystified. Although when it came to it he could not remember a time when his mother had ever done that for him either. If he recalled, every time his birthday came around, she'd make this horrible little quiche. He still couldn't eat quiche today because of it and he was always nauseous on his birthday. "And we can go wherever you like today." He said while trying to shake off the assault of memories from the past. Margo smiled a little.

It was at this point that Doctor Nefario came into the kitchen. He eyed all of the food curiously before stopping in front of Gru.

"Good morning, Gru. I have a few prototypes that you can take with you to Miss Monyneux's. You may want to take a look at them before you leave."

"There has been a slight change of plans." Gru said with just a little embarrassment. "I am going to spend thee day weeth thee gurls."

"What…were on kind of a tight schedule, Gru." The doctor said nervously.

"Yes, I know, but tomorrow was Margo's birthday. Besides, thee babysitter quit, so we're going to 'ave to find another one."

"So, you're taking the whole day of? Can we afford that? I mean…after the moon thing we really can't have another failure." He said, lowering his voice slightly as if to keep Margo out of the conversation for whatever good it did. Gru scowled at him a little.

"Margo, go get dressed and make sure your seestors are ready to go." He said carefully while ushering her out of the kitchen.

"Okay." She said hesitantly. She lingered by the doorway for a moment.

"Please do not involve them in thees." Gru said, his voice carrying a hint of warning.

"This is very important for us Gru. If you let this one slip through your fingers…well…I don't think you can come back from it."

"I 'ave already made my decision. I will call Polina and geeve her a good excuse for today. In thee meantime, try to find another babysitter. Not my mother." He added as he untied his apron. He looked up and saw Nefarios face. "Hey, chillax, I am still toally focused on thee job, but thee gurls are important to me too and I do not want to let them down." Nefario sighed.

"Well, I hope you know what you're doing. I don't know how I'm going to find another babysitter…unless you think your next door neighbor…"

"Eck, no, I don't want dat guy een my house. Find someone else."

"All right, well at least let me show you what I have now and we can talk about it when you get back tonight." Gru nodded absently.

Margo broke away from the doorway with a frown and headed upstairs.

XXX

When Margo got to their bedroom, Edith was putting on her boots and Agnes was sitting in her socks kicking happily at the air with her giant unicorn spread across her lap.

"Hey Margo, isn't this great? Told you he'd spend time with us if the babysitter wasn't here." Edith said while grinning at her sister impishly. Margo sighed as she went to the dresser and pulled out her clothes. "What's wrong?"

"I think it's my fault the babysitter quit." Margo said.

"Why? I was the one who let Kyle out and shot at her."

"Fine, then I think it's our fault." She said irately.

"Is it my fault too?" Agnes asked a little worriedly.

"No Agnes, it's not your fault." The little girl relaxed and began kicking her socked feet again. "Doesn't it bother you that dad can't go to work because of us?"

"I thought that was the idea."

"Well yeah, I'm glad he's spending the day with us too, but not he has to find someone else to babysit."

"So?" Edith said while absently playing with the strings on her hat.

"So, even Uncle Nefario doesn't want to watch us…and he's used to us. If he keeps having to hire new people he might lose his job all together…and I don't want it to be our fault. Edith eyed her from beneath her hat and sighed.

"So what do you want to do?" She asked.

"I think we should try to get the babysitter back." Edith made a noise of frustration and fell back dramatically. "I'm going to need your guys' help though."

"Can't we just try not to kill the next one?" Edith asked, her voice muffled slightly by her hat, which had slipped over her face.

"What if the next one's worse?" Margo asked, while crossing her arms.

"I thought she was nice…she gave me markers." Agnes said happily.

"Dad said I could choose where we went because he missed my birthday. Margo said innocently. Edith raised her head and gave her sister a suspicious look. "So…I could always ask that we go somewhere really really boring." The younger girl scowled.

"Fine, but if her starts ignoring us again I'm blaming you."

XXX

Margo headed into the living room while her father examined one of Nefarios new drawings while the doctor stood by and occasionally explained things when Gru asked. On a table in front of the couch there was a small model of what looked like a control panel

"The technology would of course be password protected. I imagine you'll share that only with Miss Molyneux so either of you can access it. Now I know she mentioned electricity…but I was thinking that if I modified the atomizer to work on a larger scale it would be more foolproof. More deadly too of course…so if she was just going for something to give someone a bit of a shock then it wouldn't work."

"Hmm, I was thinking maybe eet would beenifit us if she deed not know everything we know about thees."

"Oh well, that's a given of course. I designed a separate panel in the back that overrides the first. It's hidden under the G." he said while pointing at the tiny model.

"See, that ees why I kep you around." He noticed Margo in the doorway and waved the doctor away. "Are your seestors ready to go?"

"Um, almost. I was actually wondering if I could ask you a favor?"

"What ees dat?" He said as he began to wrap up the doctor's drawings.

"Uh, well, I was talking to Edith and Agnes and we thought…would you mind if we invited someone to come with us?" Gru raised his eyebrow. He caught some frantic gestures from the doctor out of the corner of his eye.

"Doctor Nefario ees very beesy today, Margo." He said quickly.

"No, I wasn't talking about Uncle Nefario." She said as the doctor slackened with relief. "I was talking about Ady." Gru stared at her blankly for a moment. He cast the doctor a brief questioning look and the man shrugged.

"Uhhh…who's Ady?"

"The babysitter dad." Margo said wearily.

"What? No! Why would you want to invite her?" He said as he stood and grabed his jacket off of the coat rack.

"I thought it'd be nice." She said with an innocent smile. Gru eyed her with suspicion. "Okay, I thought maybe she'd come back to work for you if we did." She admitted.

"I fail to see thee logic in thees plan, Margo. Eef she sees me again, she will probably call thee cops." He said while he put his jacket on and wrapped his scarf around his neck.

"I think the reason she quit is because she thinks you're a bad guy…if she sees you're not maybe she'll come back."

"There ees a flaw in that line ove thinking." Gru said darkly. "Besides, I don't even know where thees gurl lives."

"Well, can't uncle Nefario find it? I mean…can't you guys find like…anyone?" Nefario shrugged.

"Shouldn't be too hard. Do you know her last name?" Gru cast him a look of annoyance.

"Mhmm, I think it's on one of the takeout receipts."

"Thee answer ees no."

"Do you really think you can find another babysitter before tomorrow dad? I mean someone who isn't Uncle Nefario or grandma?"

"It sure isn't going to be me." Nefario said from behind him. Gru shot him another look and the doctor cleared his throat and looked down at his drawings.

"Eet will not be dat hard. I could always ask…" He paused for a moment as he considered his options, his hand raised. "I am sure I can find someone, even eef eet ees only temporary." He said finally.

"Okay, uhuh…but we like this one."

"Why? She seems completely unpleasant." He said. Margo crossed her arms. He sighed heavily.

"All right. I will tell you what. Eef you can convince her to come weeth us, without threatening her…" He added, aware that if Edith were a part of this plan it was certainly a possibility. "I will allow eet." Margo smiled.

"Thanks dad." She said as she hurried out of the living room.

"You have to admit it _would_ help us if we had a babysitter by tomorrow." The doctor said.

"They weel not be able to convince her to come along." Gru said while shaking his head.

XXX

Gru parked the tank outside what was supposed to be Ady's apartment complex. He eyed it with aversion for a moment. The doctor had found a couple of locations, as Owens was a common name. They'd narrowed it down to this apartment on the basis that the girl probably didn't live in a nursing home or insane asylum.

"Wow,,,thees place ees a dump." He said as him and the girls got out of the car. He sighed and headed up to one of the peeling doors. It had an upside down three on it, hanging loosely by a copper nail. He raised his hand to knock but before he could the door swung open revealing a slovenly she male in a tight shirt and girl jeans apparently on his way out of the apartment. He peered at Gru through a mass of greasy black hair before his eyes flickered to the girls. He grimaced.

"We don't buy stuff from charities or orphans or animals or anything." He said. Gru raised his eybrow.

"How can you buy stuff from animals?" Edith asked from behind him. Margo shushed her.

"I am not selling anything." Gru said with annoyance. "Does miss Owens live here?"

"Yeah…oh…" His face contorted a little. "You're the guy she babysits for…" He said before casting an unsettled look at Margo, Edith and Agnes. "I don't know if she told you but there's no kids allowed at this apartment complex." He said.

"Probably because of the cockroaches." Agnes said under her breath. Agnes looked at the ground worriedly and moved closer to Gru.

"Could you just get her?" He asked, while thinking of the gun he currently had tucked in his coat.

Dillon turned and shouted back into the apartment.

"Ady! There you go." He said as he stuffed his hands in his pocket and moved past Gru. He gave the girls a long berth.

"Dillon, is it really that hard to close the damn door." Gru turned back to the door as Ady appeared on the threshold. In her favor, her reaction time was quite good. The time it took between the moment where she registered his presence and attempted to slam the door shut was nearly microscopic. Gru was faster though and put his hand on the door before it could shut all the way. Ady, who had attempted to fasten the flimsy chain on the wall, watched as it snapped and fell to the ground as Gru pushed the door back open and wedged his foot in the gap.

"Now before you…" He started. Ady, who had been eyeing the chain, turned her glare on him and then pulled the door open and with as much force as she could, slammed it shut on his foot. Gru shouted and struggled out of his shoe, stumbling briefly. He grabbed his now socked foot, holding back any number of curses while the girls watched him wide eyed. Ady picked up the dress shoe and threw it out of the apartment before she shut the door.

Gru grabbed the shoe angrily and straightened. For a moment it looked as if he were going to lose his temper then he regained his composure and after replacing the shoe and straightening his scarf, he folded his hands behind his back.

"Okay den, we tried, deedn't work, nothing we can do, let's go." He said as he turned and headed back towards the tank, limping slightly. Margo rolled her eyes and approached the apartment. She knocked quietly.

"Go away." Ady said, pronouncing each word clearly and threateningly.

"Ady? Uh, it's Margo. We came by to apologize." Margo said. Ady didn't respond. Margo nudged Edith.

"Huh…oh yeah I'm sorry for trying to blow you up…I guess." Edith said half-heartedly.

"Uh…anyways, my dad is taking us out today and we're kind of celebrating my birthday too and we…I mean me and Edith and Agnes wanted to invite you along." Margo stood away from the door and eyed her sisters. After a long moment the door opened a crack.

"You're joking right?" Ady asked.

"No…we want you to come." Margo said, before giving her a hopeful smile. Ady eyed her blankly while apparently going through all of the things she could have said in respond to this. Finally she sighed and opened the door the rest way, while absently making certain that Gru was a reasonable distance away. In fact he was waiting impatiently about halfway between her front door and the tank.

"Okay…I don't know…what's going on here…but I already told your dad I'm not babysitting for him anymore."

"You wouldn't be doing any babysitting." Margo said. "We're inviting you as…a friend." Ady raised her brow.

"A friend…"

"Uh huh."

"Look…Margo, I kind of have a lot to do…I need to find a new job and go out and get a cat scan but I appreciate…the invite…I guess." She said.

"Told you she hated us." Edith said while crossing her arms and starting towards Gru. Margo grabbed her by her sleeve. Ady opened her mouth to say something but was deterred by a faint tug on her pant leg. She looked down into Agnes' massive brown eyes.

"Why don't you like us?" The young girl asked.

"I didn't say…I didn't like you." Ady said, slightly flustered. "I just don't really want…I mean I can't…and your father…I don't hate you."

"Well then why wont you come celebrate Margo's birthday?" Edith asked.

The other two girls turned towards her and eyed her intently. Agnes' eyes threatened to swallow her face. After a moment Ady's eyes narrowed.

"Does this actually work on people?" She asked.

"What do you mean?" Margo asked guiltily.

"I may not have a lot of experience with kids, but I'm not an idiot. Nice try though."

Margo sighed. Well, it was time to use their secret weapon. She hated doing it but in this case it looked like they didn't have a choice and if it had worked on her dad, it would probably work on Ady. She nodded to Agnes.

Ady heard the youngest girl inhale noisily and turned as she took a deep breath and held it.

"What is she doing?"

"She's holding her breath."

"Why is she doing that?" Ady asked uncertainly.

"She's going to hold it until you agree to come with us."

"That's kind of childish isn't it?" Ady said with some frustration.

"We're children." Edith said in the same tones one would use to say; 'duh.'

"Does she do this a lot?" The girl was turning slightly purple.

"Only when she really really wants something. She'll hold her breath until she passes out." Ady gave Margo a doubtful look before her gaze returned to Agnes, who was turning blue and beginning to sway a little.

"Okay, okay!" Ady said alarmingly, while holding her palms out. "I'll come, don't pass out on my sidewalk!" Agnes took a deep breath. Ady glared at Margo briefly and sighed. "I'll get my shoes." She said as she headed back into the apartment.

Gru had been watching all of this in awe.

"You 'ave got to be keeding me." He said under his breath when the young woman emerged once more a few minutes later. Agnes, quite over her brief period of asphyxiation, grabbed the girl's hand and started pulling her excitedly towards the tank. As she passed Ady gave Gru a look of pure hatred.

"Oh, eet ees going to be a long day." Gru said to himself, his shoulders slumping. He should have never made that deal with Margo. After all, these were the girls who got him to take them to ballet practice on the second day he knew them.

"That was cheating!" He hissed at Margo as she approached.

"You just said we couldn't threaten her." Margo replied, while smiling.

"Threatening to suffocate ees a form ove threatening!" Margo shrugged. "Eef you think I'm going to play along weeth thees you are wrong. I am not going to put on some kind of act for thees gurl."

"Fine." Margo said, still smiling.

"I meant it." He said, aware that he was losing some sort of battle, but not entirely certain what it was.

"Okay." Margo said as she climbed up into the tank. He growled under his breath. Margo leaned out the door.

"But do you think you could at least not shoot anyone?"

"Fine, because eet ees your birthday." He muttered before climbing up into the driver's seat.

XXX

Ady had said something about taking a cab while eyeing the tank as someone might eye a splintering bridge that they would soon have to cross, but was cajoled inside by Agnes and Edith, possibly on the basis that if she did take a cab, they would probably never see her again. She admitted that this notion was not entirely without merit.

She was sitting in the back, insofar as it could be called, as it was a very small compartment, between Margo and Edith, her shoulders slumped and her knuckles white as she grabbed onto the underside of the seat. They must've at least been going 90 miles an hour. The girl's seemed unconcerned by this. In fact, Agnes was leaning over Gru's chair with a Unicorn toy, which she was dangling in front of his eyes.

"Agnes, now ees not a good time to be doing thees. Please seet down." He said while carefully taking the toy from her.

"Aw." Agnes said. "Where are we going?" She asked while ignoring his suggestion to sit down and instead leaning further over the chair so she could rest on his shoulder.

"I do not know. Where do you want to go?" He said while making a conscious effort to slow down a little so that she wouldn't fall.

"Can we go to the movies?" Margo asked.

"Yeah movies!" Gru winced a little as Agnes shouted in his ear.

"Okay, we will go to thee movies." He said.

Ady relaxed a little, partly because the tank had gotten down to a reasonable speed and partly because she had worried about what this man considered to be a day out. Going to the movies sounded relatively normal.

XXX

Gru and the girl's headed up to the theatre after Gru parked in between two minivans, putting gashes on the sides of both and flipping one over onto the car beside. It. Ady followed them at a slight distance.

They stopped at the door and Gru eyed the line up to the ticket booth with annoyance, feeling the weight of the freeze ray in his coat. At his side, Margo was reading off the names of the movies to her sisters. Ady stood off to the side and eyed the crowd wearily. It was a Saturday at three o' clock so there were a lot o people there; mostly families with small children and teens talking at the top of their voice obnoxiously and with bad grammar.

There were a couple posters hanging up on the wall nearby, one of them caught Agnes' eye and she bounced over to it and gasped a little.

"Ooh, can we see this one?" She asked, getting their attention. Ady eyed it and grimaced a little. The movie was called 'The Magical Forest' and it was no wonder she had been drawn to it. There was a big unicorn on the front. It was actually kind of creepy. There were a lot of pastel colors and everything was grinning. In Ady's opinion grinning horses should be avoided; in real life it probably meant that it was going to try to kick you to death.

It was clear by Gru's expression that he felt the same way. He approached the poster and hoisted Agnes up to his shoulders. The other girls walked over as well.

"A magical tale ove friendship and love for thee whole family." Gru read aloud, before rubbing at his eyes. "Oh Agnes that sounds…just horrible."

"Please." She said while resting her hands and chin on the top of his head.

"Eet ees up to your seestor." He said while looking pleadingly at Margo, who smiled.

"It's fine with me." She said brightly.

"Are you sure…there isn't anything else you want to see?" He asked with frustration. She nodded. "All right." He said with a heavy sigh. "I am not buying your teekit." He added while casting a dark look at Ady.

XXX

Gru eyed the room that the film was playing in dismally. It was packed with children. His eye flinched briefly before he cleared his throat and gestured for his daughters to precede him up the narrow carpeted stairs. He eyed the former babysitter as she approached him.

"Yesterday it was pretty clear that your daughter wanted me gone. If you think I believe for a second that they decided to invite me along on their own, you're wrong. I don't know what you're doing, but it isn't going to work." She said in a low dangerous voice.

"Believe me, eef eet were up to me, you would not be here." He responded before heading up the stairs himself. Ady examined the theater wearily for a moment. On the screen some preview was playing for an obnoxious movie with talking animals. Ady massaged the bridge of her nose before following Gru and the girls.

She got stuck sitting next to a kid who was throwing a temper tantrum. His mother, who was sitting on the other side of him, apparently with no intention of stopping it and instead was searching through her purse for some painkillers.

Her attention was diverted when she realized that beside her, Agnes was making small distressed noises. Ady looked sideways at her.

"What's wrong?" She asked while leaning away from the noisy child on the other side of her.

"I can't see." Agnes said. She looked over at her father and then climbed out of the chair. Ady watched her with her eyebrow raised.

Gru was sitting in between Edith and Margo with his leg crossed while he examined the 3D glasses they had been given with their tickets with a frown.

"People actually get entertainment out of these cheap plastic things?" He said quietly. Agnes pulled on his pant leg. He looked down at her.

"Can I sit on your lap daddy? I can't see form my seat." Ady, who fully expected for him to tell her to return to her seat was surprised when he uncrossed his leg and hoisted Agnes up onto his lap.

She smiled and put on her own 3D glasses which slipped down the bridge of her nose. Gru chuckled.

"I think they are a leetle small for you." He said as he adjusted them for her. Agnes beamed at him. He must've sensed Ady's gaze because he turned towards her. Ady promptly looked away.

She moved, with some relief one seat closer to Margo, away from the screaming child and began undoing the plastic on her glasses.

"So do you actually want to see this movie, or are you just doing it for your sister?" She asked the oldest girl casually. Margo looked at her.

"I don't mind. Agnes has never been to the movies." She said with a shrug. The theatre went dark as the movie started.

Ady put her feet up on the seat in front of her and sank down into her chair with a sigh.

XXX

About fifteen minutes into the movie, Gru had already given up on expecting any sort of plot or conflict and knew the future would probably hold obnoxious songs and a lot of things bouncing and smiling. As it was the first fifteen minutes consisted only of some exceptionally annoying characters frolicking in a forest. He wondered how long a movie like this usually lasted.

When he couldn't stand looking at the screen any more he turned his gaze to Margo. He too had suspected that she just agreed to see the film for Agnes, but as far as he could tell she was showing every sign of enjoying it. She caught his gaze and smiled at him. He returned it weakly before turning back to the screen.

After a moment he looked sideways at her again as she raised the armrest between their chairs and scooted closer to him. He smiled, this time with more feeling and put his arm around her shoulders. Edith who had been chewing on her hat strings and watching with boredom, leaned against his other arm, while on his lap Agnes clutched at his knees, her eyes glued to the screen with excitement. Gru sat back in his chair contentedly.

Ady, who had been watching the movie with equal disdain, happened to look over when she realized Margo was no longer right next to her. She had been fairly certain that this was some sort of diluted scam with probably exceptionally horrifying undertones, and she still wasn't ruling out the possibility, but it was fairly obvious that at least in this circumstance, that Gru and the girls were completely oblivious to her presence. She looked away before the man caught her looking over again. Her expression was one of bewilderment.

XXX

By the time they left the movie Gru was beginning to feel the start of a headache in his right eye. The movie had been just as bad as he thought it would be. The closest thing it had had to an antagonist was some wizard character who's evil plan consisted of killing all of the flowers in the magical forest. By the end of the film Gru wanted to strangle every single character in the movie and wished to burn the magical forest down. Agnes had asked him, once the credits were rolling if they could buy it when it came out on tape. He really hoped that she forgot about it once it did. It didn't help that there had been some kid a few seats down screaming his head off through the whole thing while his mother was passed out on Valium in the chair next to him.

While on the road, heading towards downtown they passed a place called Hinkle's family fun Center, which unfortunately seemed to grab the girl's attention.

"Ooh, can we go?" Edith asked while grasping on Gru's sleeve.

"Eef eets okay weeth Margo." He said gloomily. A family fun center sounded even more horrible then the movies…although it was a little hard to imagine something more terrifying then The Magical forest had been.

"That sounds like fun!" Margo said brightly.

"Ove course eet does." Gru said as he pulled into the parking lot.

XXX

Walking into the family fun center was like walking into an as of yet undiscovered circle of hell. They were assaulted by the sound of tons of children screaming.

Ady eyed the room with a mixture of horror and exasperation. There were tons of them; laughing and shrieking with runny noses and sticky hands while their parents sat on benches, occasionally dishing out money while they chatted on their cell phones and kept a indolent eye on their brats.

A boy of about eight with no sense of personal space ran by her and Gru, stepping on Ady's foot in the process. He halted and pointed a plastic gun at them and made shooting noises before running off. Ady saw Gru's fingers twitch a little and for a moment she caught his frustrated gaze.

"Cool, they have laser tag!" Edith said, getting both of their attention. She was eyeing the counter with the belts and guns.

"Can we play?" Margo asked him. He eyed her and sighed a little.

XXX

Gru adjusted the tiny belt with a look of annoyance on his face, taking a deep breath so that he could fasten the final snap.

"Thees ees ridiculous." He said as he picked up the tiny plastic gun and pulled the trigger experimentally. It lit up a little and made a really annoying sound.

"Come on, it'll be fun. We can be on teams." Margo said as she finished putting on her own belt. She grabbed another belt and gun and approached Ady. "Here."

"Uh, no thanks, you guys go ahead." She said while waving it away.

"You have to play." Edith said. "Agnes doesn't count."

"Hey, do to!" Agnes said while sticking her tongue out at Edith.

"You can be on my team Agnes." Margo said.

"I wanna be with dad!" Edith said hurriedly, while grabbing his pant leg. He looked from his plastic gun down to her. Margo looked back at Ady.

"We could use one more. Dad's a really good shot." Ady raised her eyebrow. She groaned inwardly and took it. Gru smiled evilly.

"Good luck." He said facetiously as he took Edith's hand and headed towards the entrance of the laser tag area. Ady glared at his back and began putting on her belt.

The laser tag arena had been cleverly labeled Laser World and it was just as annoying as the rest of the place. Apparently Laser World consisted of obnoxious bright lights, unnecessary smoke, presumably form dry ice and a series of poorly constructed mountain ranges made out of glitter covered Styrofoam.

Ady scratched a bit of one of the mountains experimentally and flicked away a tiny piece of it. Margo had suggested splitting up and she and Edith had headed in a different direction. Ady leaned against the mountain and watched, bored as a couple of boys played nearby, making a lot of exaggerated jumps that they probably thought looked cool but really made them look kind of like twerps. After a while she pulled out a cell phone and checked the time.

"Ha, gotcha!" She looked up as Edith jumped out from behind the mountain and shot her. Her belt flashed. Ady looked down at it.

"Does this mean I'm dead?" She asked apathetically.

"You have to be shot three times. That's what the lights mean." Edith said with frustration. "It's not fun if you're not trying."

"Fair enough." Ady said as she raised her own gun and shot Edith.

"Aw, no fair!" Edith said before hurrying away again. Ady smiled a little and broke away form the Styrofoam wall.

She weaved through some of the badly made structures, while trying to avoid screaming children. After going around a cardboard spaceship in which a girl was beating a boy over the head with her plastic gun she spotted Agnes and Margo a little ways away trying to sneak up on Gru.

She raised her eyebrow and ducked behind a wall.

Gru was trying to adjust his belt, which pinching at his chest and kept getting tangled up in his scarf. He must've heard the girls approaching though because once they got near enough he spun around and shot both of them. Margo looked down at her flashing belt and then back up at her father.

"How did you know we were here?" She asked.

"Agnes was humming." He said with the hint of a smile. The younger girl was looking at her own belt miserably.

"Aww, I only have one life left.' She said before giving Gru a truly heartbroken look. He frowned.

"All right, you can 'ave one free shot." He said while raising his arms.

Ady was watching them when her own belt lit up again. She sighed and turned around.

"You're really bad at this game." Edith said while raising her hat a little to look at Ady.

"Apparently." She said as she pointed her gun at the girl once more. Edith stumbled in her attempt to get away, tripped on precariously placed fake rock and fell heavily. Her gun slid across the floor.

"Ouch." She said, her voice slightly muffled. Ady lowered the plastic gun.

"Are you okay?" She asked as she approached the girl.

"I ripped my hose." Edith said as she sat up and examined her purple tights. There was a large hole in the hosiery at the knee, which was skinned.

"Is your knee okay?"

"Yeah, it's hardly bleeding." She said, obviously more upset about the hose. "This is my last pair." She added as she fingered the rip and then glared a little at Ady, clearly blaming her for the unfortunate rock.

"Well, you can pretend the hole is intentional. Some people buy hose with holes already in them."

"Why?" Edith asked, while raising her eyebrow.

"I dunno, I guess they think it's cool. Just poke a few more holes in them and you're set." She said as she retrieved Edith's gun and handed it back to her. Edith was examining her hose critically.

"Here." Ady said while kneeling down and taking a pinch of the girls hose at her shin. "You just take a pair of scissors and cut it here. I used to do it in high school all the time."

Edith stood up and eyed her uncertainly for a moment.

"I'm not really good with scissors unless I'm stabbing things."

"Well if you remind me before I go home I can do it for you." Ady said. Edith adjusted her hat awkwardly and nodded a little before rushing off.

Ady shook her head and reached for her gun only to find it was no longer at her side. She found it a few feet away, beneath one of Gru's dress shoes, which was slightly scuffed after she'd shut it in the door. She frowned and looked up into his malicious smile.

"Oh damn." She said under her breath. Gru's smile broadened a little and he chuckled.

"So tell me, what exactly are you getting out of all of this?" She asked while resting her arm across her knee. His smile faded a little and he raised his foot and kicked her gun back to her. She raised her eyebrow and gave him a questioning look.

"There ees no pleasure een shooting you weeth a plastic gun." He said, as if to indicate that it would have been another matter if the gun were real. Ady picked it up as he turned around.

"I disagree." She said from behind him, right before his belt lit up. He raised his eyebrows and spun around as Ady quickly withdrew. Gru scowled and headed after her.

"Hey." Ady said as she jogged up to Margo, while looking over her shoulder cautiously. "How are you guys going?"

"I'm dead." Agnes said morosely.

"Edith got her. I shot Edith, so she's done, but my dad still has two lives left." Margo said. Edith was sitting on one of the smaller mountains looking slightly annoyed.

"No he doesn't." Ady said, as she caught sight of Gru approaching. She rushed off as Gru pulled the trigger. He missed her, and accidentally hit Margo instead. Margo looked down.

"Sorry Margo." He said as he halted.

"She actually shot you?" Edith asked from beside her.

"Not…I was distracted." He said defensively. "Stay here. Thees weel be over very quickly." He said as he headed after her again.

Edith and Margo shared a look.

"I think dad's going to kill the babysitter." Edith said.

"He's not going to kill her. He promised he wouldn't use real guns today." She said with some doubt.

XXX

Ady was taking cover behind one of the glitter-covered structures and keeping her eye on the path leading up to it. It was nearing six o' clock so much of the area had cleared out.

While she was looking at the path she heard a faint sound on the other side of the structure and turned in time to see Gru land neatly on his feet behind her.

"Holy crap." She said as she lurched away from him. He'd vaulted over the damn mountain! She moved quickly enough so that he missed again when he tried to shoot her. Because she'd lost her tennis shoes, she had been forced to wear sandals. She kicked them off and scooped them up so that she could run better.

Gru followed her. Ady slid past a pre teen couple who seemed to be taking advantage of the dark room as well as completely missing the point of the game. Gru didn't bother with niceties and pushed them out of his way brusquely.

She risked a look behind her before dodging behind another mountain range. Because the floor was hard and Gru was wearing dress shoes, she could hear the tap of his footsteps as he approached. They paused and from the sound of it he was right on the other side. She looked at the top of the mountain and wondered vaguely if he'd try to come over it again, then she raised her eyebrow.

In fact, Gru had slowed his pace and was getting ready to sneak up on her from the other side. As he reached the edge his belt lit up for the third and final time. He grimaced and looked up. Ady had climbed up on top of the foam mountain. She lowered her gun.

"You're dead." She said, pausing for a moment to enjoy the thought of this. Gru's brow furled. He opened his mouth to say something unpleasant as Ady worked her way down off of the construction, but in the process part of the Styrofoam crumbled under her foot and she fell off. She managed to land on her feet, but stumbled forward into Gru, causing whatever nasty comment he were about to say to die in his throat. He caught her and his plastic gun fell to the ground. Ady wound up with her hands pressed against his chest. For a moment they shared a look of astonishment before both of them pulled away in unison.

A moment later they both returned to the girls. Margo gave them a questioning look, secretly glad that Ady seemed to be unharmed.

"We won." Ady said with a half smile.

"That's great!" Margo said, slightly surprised. Ady put her palm out and Margo gave her high five. At her feet Agnes stood on her tiptoes and offered her palm. Ady smiled and gave her a high five too.

Gru crossed his arms. It was hard for him to be too angry, seeing that Margo was happy. After all this was her birthday celebration. She looked at him and smiled. He returned it with his eyebrow raised.

XXX

Because it was getting late they headed home after leaving the family fun center. Gru refused to return to Ady's apartment building on principle and said she could call a cab from their house. After some persistence from the girls he grudgingly allowed her to wait inside until it got there.

Edith found a pair of scissors and approached Ady with them with uncharacteristic tentativeness as she finished her call. Ady took them from her.

"Oh yeah, the hose." She said as she motioned for Edith to sit down. "Where do you want them, kid?" She asked. Edith shrugged. "Okay then." She added as she began to carefully cut holes in the fabric. Edith eyed the scissors with fascination.

As she did, Margo and Agnes crawled up onto the couch.

"You sure you don't want to stay for dinner?" Margo asked. Ady shook her head.

"No thank you." She looked up at Agnes. "And don't even think about holding your breath." She said while pointing at her, the scissors still in her hand. The little girl made a pouting face.

"We're not going to force you, we're just asking." Margo said with a shrug. Ady looked up at her and gave her a half smile.

"My cabs already on the way." She said. "There, done." She added to Edith, before handing the scissors back to her. Edith stood up and examined the hose.

"Cool." She said. She eyed Ady who had rested her chin on her wrist. "Thanks." She added in a small voice before leaving quickly to return the scissors to where she had gotten them. Ady raised her eyebrow. She turned back to Margo after a moment.

"So, I'm curious, what exactly were you guys hoping to accomplish by inviting me out today anyways?"

"What do you mean?" Margo asked innocently.

"Well, originally I thought it was something you're dad planned out…either to dump you guys on me or for some other unclear sinister reason that would result in some other aspect of my life going to hell, but I got to thinking and really…it just doesn't make any sense that way." She said while running her hand through her hair. "Now I'm pretty sure it was your idea." Margo deflated a little.

"I guess I was hoping you'd take your job back."

"Why? I thought we agreed yesterday that I'm lousy with kids." Ady said while straightening and giving her a perplexed look.

"I don't think you're that bad. Besides, we kind of like you as our babysitter." Margo said. Agnes smiled.

"Yeah, we like you." She said gleefully.

"And you've lasted here a lot longer then most people would." Margo added. Ady frowned.

XXX

Gru had a cookbook open beside him and he was flipping back and forth between a couple of different pages. Ady walked into the kitchen behind him.

"My cab is here." She said as Gru looked up at her. He gave her a 'why should I care?' look.

"Great, goodbye den." He said with annoyance.

"What are you doing?" She asked while eyeing his apron. Because of countless washes with the girl's tutus it had become a pinkish red color.

"That ees none ove your business." He said while returning his gaze to the book. He looked up again with annoyance as she came closer.

"You're making a cake?" She asked sardonically. "Is that for Margo? You're not going with that custard thing are you?"

"Deed you want something een particular?" He asked with frustration. He paused for a moment. "What ees wrong with thee custard cake?"

"Nothing, except that she's what ten, eleven? It'd be fine if she were thirty, I guess."

"Thees coming from someone who orders meedle eastern food while babysitting?" He responded.

"Fine, I may not know kids but I do know that when I was eleven I wouldn't have wanted a custard cake." Gru looked back down at the cookbook. He probably could just ask Margo what she wanted, but part of him wanted to kind of just surprise her with it. He'd already forgotten her birthday…shouldn't parents know what kind of cake their kids liked? "What kind ove cake would you suggest then?" He asked a little grudgingly. Ady shrugged.

"Usually can't go wrong with chocolate…most people like that." He sighed as he flipped the page. "Deedn't you say your cab was here?" He said after a moment when she still hadn't left.

"Yeah, but I came in here to…I mean…if you still need a babysitter I…would not mind…I mean I think I could stand taking the position again." She said. He looked up at her, somewhat taken aback.

"I thought you 'weren't going to help me neglect my kids.'" He said mockingly.

"I'm not…I'd have some conditions." Gru sighed and slumped his shoulders.

"I am not paying you any more money."

"Fine, but I don't want to come here every day. Four days a week, five at the most." He raised his eyebrow. "And you have to be back by eight o' clock." She added.

"What makes you think I even want to hire you back?" He asked.

"Well you don't have to but speaking from experience if you try to hire someone else they're not going to last. No one in their right mind would work for you…" He considered this as he began to take out the pans and trays to make dinner and the cake.

"Why eight o' clock?" He asked finally as he straightened with the stuff.

"Girl's bedtime." Ady said. He leaned on the counter.

"If I am back at eight, then you would have to come early on some days."

"I can do that."

"And don't get takeout every night."

"I can't cook."

"Yes, well that ees obvious. I'm still scraping out my cups but I don't want dem eating takeout every night."

"All right. I'll figure something out. So do we have a deal?" She asked as she offered him her hand. He looked at it for a moment.

"All right. Deal." He said as he took it and they shook.

XXX 

Woo! I actually managed to finish the chapter today. I am actually quite surprised about that. Fortunately my dad's busy hanging out with his friends and my mom worked late so I've got this piece of crap computer all to myself. It's kind of annoying tho, if I still had my laptop this probably would have just took me a couple of hours, but copying the chapter down made this an all day thing. OO

I'll get working on the next chapter when I can, but now that this is my only connection to the Internet outside of school it's not going to be as easy for me to write. Still hopefully this chapter will somewhat make up for it. It's by far the longest I've ever written.

To those of you I was not able to reply to automatically on the last chapter:

To Roxasnarulover: I am glad that you like it ^^ Thank you so much for your review. I do hope that this chapter did not disappoint.

To person. Idk : Yay review :3 Seriously though, I do appreciate it. I hope you enjoyed this update as well.

If I forgot to reply to someone I am very sorry.

Thanks for reading and have a great night!


	9. The Incident At The Park

Chapter Eight:

The Incident At The Park

It took Gru the best part of an hour to actually bake a cake out of scratch and then another hour or so to decorate it. He'd never made a cake before because he'd never had any particular reason to, as pastry baking is generally not a skill most villains require, but it didn't turn out being all that hard. Gru seemed to have a flair for cooking. This sometimes worried him, but then again he'd been out on his own since he was seventeen and the minions could _not_ cook so in the long run he hadn't had much choice.

After the cake was finished and he'd decorated it he located something that could at least pass off as candles. He underwent a brief moment of panic fueled mostly by his unease at missing her birthday in the first place when he wasn't sure how many to put on the surface, but that resolved itself fairly quickly. He didn't need the file for that. He knew how old the girls were. What he did need was a good night's sleep.

When it was finished he looked over it critically and then picked it up with care.

"All right, here is thee cake." He said, bringing it out, as they were finishing up their dinner. All three girls eyed the cake excitedly as he set it down on the table. It had turned out rather impressively. Another thing a villain really shouldn't be good at was any sort of skill involving arts and crafts, but it was another thing he seemed to have a worrisome flair for. In icing on the top of the cake he'd drawn a pink astronaut lassoing the moon. He hadn't had time to draw the shrink ray. In lettering across the top he'd written;

_Margo, for you, I'd steal the moon. _

Margo looked up at him with a smile and he winked.

"Now blow out your candles." He said. "Quickly, they are tiny steecks of dynamite." He added with a little more urgency.

She blew out her candles. Gru helped with the last few, which didn't seem to want to go out and then when they had he plucked them all from the cake just to be safe.

"Cool it's chocolate." Edith said as he returned from disposing of them. Gru scoffed a little.

"Ove course eet ees chocolate, what else would eet be." He said, with a hint of reticence. Margo surprised him by wrapping her arms tightly around his waist.

"Thanks dad." She said. He smiled and returned her hug.

"You are very welcome."

After cleaning up the kitchen and getting the girls to bed, Gru headed to his own bedroom exhaustively. He changed into his silk pjs with the G embroidered on the breast pocket, tossed the pinstripe slacks and turtleneck into a clothes hamper made out of a hollowed out bomb and got under the covers. He'd just about dozed off when his cell phone rang. Gru groaned and picked it up off of the end table. He eyed the number wearily and sighed before sitting up and throwing the covers off.

Fifteen minutes later he was standing on the lift and descending into the lab. Because appearances did count for something he'd changed back into his clothes, although it didn't occur to him to put his shoes back on, so he stepped off of the lift in his socks and stuffed his hands in his pockets as he approached Dr. Nefario who seemed to be still trying to reach him on his cell phone.

"Oh, there you are." The doctor said as he lowered his phone. "What happened, I thought we were going to work on getting some of this done before tomorrow."

"Yeah, time…sort ove got away from me." Gru said with a yawn.

"Well, I've started building the control panel." He said as he motioned towards the skeleton of the thing. "But I could use some help." He added with perhaps a hint of accusation.

"All right." Gru replied as he motioned for one of the minions to approach. "Billy, I'm going to need a cup of coffee."

"Moka batida frou frou?" Billy asked with a shrug.

"What? No just get me regular coffee." He said as Dr. Nefario began messing with the wiring in the back of the consol.

"Crema to sato?"

"Surprise me." He said dryly as he turned back to the doctor and eyed the plans sprawled out on the counter.

"So you decided to go weeth thee vaporization?" He asked as he picked up a corner of the page.

"Give me a set of the red wires." The doctor said as he outstretched his hand. Gru eyed the mess of rubbish stacked up on the table and grabbed a bundle of red wires which he handed over wordlessly. "Yes, well, it's better then electrocution. You never know how many volts of it would be lethal…it's different for everyone you know…but no one survives the atomizer. Of course we could look into poison gas again if you like."

"That ees all right." Gru said as he picked the page up and examined it closer. "Eesn't thees supposed to be…something we can use as a method of persuasion?"

"Yeah, seems pretty persuasive to me, why?"

"Well…eets hard to threaten someone when they're a pile ove dust."

"True, but Miss Molyneux called in this afternoon and she seemed to like this better then electrocution. Said it was cleaner…which is true, all you need is a broom and a dustpan. We could look at poison gas again I suppose…"

"Uh…no, that ees all right. Polina called here today?"

"Yeah, said she wanted to talk to you…I told her you were dealing with very delicate materials and could not be called away. Incidentally why did you tell her you could not meet with her today?"

"I told her part ove thee lab exploded.

"Oh well…I suppose those lies match up well enough." The doctor said brightly.

"Yah, for now anyways." He said. "Thank you Billy." He added as his minion handed over a cup of coffee.

"Did that girl agree to come back to work with you?" The doctor said as he snapped a few wires into place.

"Until she decides to queet again, yes." Gru said as he took a drink of coffee.

"Good."

"I suppose so." He said with some weariness. For fifteen minutes or so they did not talk apart from Nefario's requests for various tools. Finally Gru sighed heavily.

"Do you theenk I'm losing my touch?" He asked after a moment as he picked up a strange tool and turned it around in his long fingers.

"No…I wouldn't say that." The doctor said after a brief pause. He'd started to wonder if Gru were quote; losing his touch, unquote a month prior when the girls had moved in again, or something…perhaps losing his touch was not the right phrase. Losing something, certainly…some of his venom, maybe, or his bite. There had definitely been a change in him. But he wasn't about to say any of this out loud. "Although I would be careful about overdoing the personal days." He said instead. "Give me one of those weird looking wrenches. Incidentally why do you ask?"

"Dat gurl, thee babysitter…" Gru started bitterly as he handed the older man the tool. "I'm involved in a plan to take over thee world and I'm bargaining with a gurl who was not alive in thee 70's."

"Bargaining? What does she want?"

"She ees refusing to work every day and I 'ave to be back here by eight."

"She gave you a curfew?" The doctor asked while eyeing Gru curiously.

"Eet ees not a curfew. Eets just…" Gru frowned. Damn, it kind of was. "Well what am I supposed to do about eet?"

"Threaten her." The doctor said matter of factly. "You want to try one of the new weapons? I'm sure the minions would be glad if we used someone else for a test subject for once."

"Uh, turning thees gurl to dust…would not really solve my problem."

"Well I didn't say this one. I've been working on creating a zero point energy gun…lifts heavy objects and harnesses the lost force to throw them across the room. That could be potentially traumatizing."

"Thee last time I pointed a gun at her, eet deed leetle good." He said, with a hint of awkwardness. "Threatening her seems to 'ave stopped working."

"Well then just fire her, if it bothers you that much." Gru's shoulders slumped.

"I cannot fire her…" Gru said while running a frustrated hand over his tired eyes. "Thee gurls like her." Doctor Nefario shrugged.

"I don't really see what the problem is here, Gru. The important thing is that we _have_ a babysitter. It's not like you have to see her or talk to her. There was a good chance that you wouldn't have liked anyone who took the job." Gru sighed.

"Yeah, you are probably right." The doctor looked up from his work and clapped a companionable hand on Gru's shoulder.

"Don't worry, Gru. After we pull this off, _no one's_ going to think you've lost your touch."

XXX

Ady pulled open the door to the small closet near the bedroom, pushing back the inevitable flow of junk that threatened to spill out with her socked foot. At the top of the closet were a couple of decaying boxes. She selected one of the heavier ones and pulled it out, allowing it to drop to the floor with a thud. Inside were a selection of exceptionally dull books of the sort that accumulate uncontrollably in any living area. Most of what were hers were textbooks from college, the rest she had somehow acquired from her mother for one reason or another.

She sifted through several depressing looking self-help books with titles like 'How to Be The Best You, You Can Be' 'The Land of I Can.' and the exceptionally insightful 'You Are You.' She wondered vaguely if any of them had told her mother to become emotionally dependant on unreliable men, or had advised her to eventually remarry to a guy with controlling issues who monitored her phone conversations and emails.

She found what she was looking for down at the bottom of the box, complete with an obnoxious checkered pattern and cutesy illustration. '1001 Fun and Easy Recipes.' It smelled heavily of mildew. Ady frowned and opened the book up at a random page, which showed how to make chili with anchovies. She wondered vaguely how 'fun' that was supposed to be…particularly for the people who had to eat it.

"Uck." She said before straightening and kicking the box against the wall. She walked towards the small kitchen, flipping through the pages listlessly. When she had been younger, her mother almost never cooked outside of warming up frozen foods. On those few occasions when she had, it had been pretty awful. Ady wondered if those recipes had come from this book. If they had, it should probably be thrown away.

"Oh well." She said as she set it down and turned towards the index. Might as well start with a few easy recipes and see how it went.

"Let's start with spaghetti." She said to herself as she flipped to the recipe. Now, was it too much to hope that her and Dillon had, at some point bought measuring cups or spoons or something useful? Probably. She sighed and started looking through the cupboards.

XXX

A couple hours later Dillon woke up and dragged himself out of bed. When he headed into the kitchen he blinked fuzzily at the mess. There were a few paper shopping bags on the kitchen table and an array of ingredients on every surface. Ady was leaning against the counter with the cookbook in her hand, lazily stirring something on the top of the stove.

"What are you doing?" He asked finally. She looked up.

"I'm making spaghetti." She responded as she took a drink of instant coffee.

"It's 9:00 am." He said as he walked into the kitchen and stared at a bottle of olive oil as if he'd never seen anything like it before. "I didn't even know you could cook."

"Judging by how awful this sauce is, I'd say I can't. I'm learning." She said casually. "I think I may have added too much of the tomato paste stuff. The noodles are doing okay though…I don't know why I never tried this before it really isn't that hard."

"Why are you learning to cook?" Dillon asked as he picked up a thing of Parmesan cheese and held it up to his eyes.

"I'm not allowed to order takeout while I'm babysitting anymore, besides I don't know about you, but I wouldn't mind eating something that doesn't come out of a can or has been sitting in the freezer for three months." She met his expression. "What?"

"All right, you're starting to freak me out." He said.

"You can still eat freezer food if you want…I wasn't going to cook for you anyways."

"No I mean this whole…cooking…thing." He said as he set the cheese down again. "I've just…never seen you do it before."

"Because I haven't…because I'm _learning_." She said with some annoyance.

"I don't like it." He said while shaking his head.

"Well I'll be sure to keep that in mind." She said cynically.

XXX

Gru needn't of worried about speaking to the babysitter, as it seemed as if she had the same goal. Upon her arrival she brushed past him as if he weren't there at all. This irked him slightly but as he was already running late, he did not pursue it.

Once he got to Polina's estate he was ushered into a dining area far larger then that of his own, where Polina was sitting on a long stool at a bar made of pure ivory. She was drinking out of an exquisite crystal glass in which was some of the wine he'd drunk on the first day he'd been shown into her house. She offered some to him now.

"No thanks." He said. Although he would have never said it out loud, he did not care much for the wine, which she had called _Vigne des larmes_. It translated roughly to vine of tears. It certainly had flair and added an impressive quality to her _mode de vie_, but frankly he couldn't see the relation between the gypsy orphan's foot size and their wine making ability.

"Did you get your work done?" She asked as she took a sip from her glass.

"Some ove eet." He responded. He'd once again brought the shrink ray at her request as well as a few of the things him and Dr. Nefario had been working on since much earlier in the morning. "We are steel working on a lot of eet, but eet should be done on time."

"Very good." She said. Doug was once again standing nearby in case she needed something. Another of her minions approached them. He was also of a massive stature and was of course, also tongueless.

"Yes Boris?" Polina asked. The minion reached into his jacket and pulled out a small slip of paper, which he then handed to her. She read it briefly before smiling a little.

"It would seem zat ze man I put in charge ove our prisoners ez having some difficulty. I suppose zat ez what happens when you trust an idiot to guard men wiz brains. Come; let us sort zis out shall we. And I can show you my confinement center. Bring ze shrink ray." She added as she took Gru's arm and pulled him from the chair.

They followed Boris down a long hallway with Doug trailing behind. It ended at a large steel door. Polina punched something into a panel embedded in the wall and the door opened into a room that vaguely resembled Gru's lab, except that it was much neater and was made up of 85% glass walls.

"Polycarbonate thermoplastic." Polina said. "Coated wiz diamond. Very expensive." In a large cell in the center of the expansive room were the men that they had collected two days prior, as well as a few others, which Gru assumed Polina had gathered on her own. There weren't tied up. One could tell that most of them men in the cell were used to maintaining a neat appearance but having spent a day the size of an action figure and then being thrown in detainment were now frazzled and disheveled.

When they saw them approach a couple of them recoiled wearing hunted expressions, while some maintained their composure.

"Turn on ze microphone Boris." She said to the burly man as she pulled out her cigarette holder and carefully pushed an expensive roll up into it. "Do you 'ave a light?" She asked Gru sweetly. He tore his eyes away from the cell and pulled the lighter from his coat as Boris handed her a small microphone. "Sank you, get me Alexander and jar please. One of ze special ones." She added as Boris lumbered off again.

"Good afternoon, gentlemen." She said with a crooked smile as brought the tiny speaker up to her painted lips. "You are very valuable to ze world alive, as well as to myself and my partner here, so I urge you to listen very carefully to what I am saying so zat you might not force me to exterminate you. I am sure I am correct in assuming zat you are hard men to sway and break but I am very good at what I do. I am sure you are, even now azzi speak planning to find some means of escape, but you must trust me when I say it iz impozzible." At this point Boris approached her once more with the jar and a minion, presumeably Alexander trailing behind. "If you do not believe me allow me to demonstrate. Gru, please fire at Alexander wiz ze shrink ray." She said as she motioned to him. Gru raised his eyebrow and hoisted the shrink ray up to get the minion in range. A moment later a bewildered Alexander shrank to the floor. Boris picked him up, pinching the now tiny man's collar between his thumb and forefinger.

Polina undid the lid to the jar and Boris dropped Alexander inside. She approached the glass as the terrified men watched her from inside and set the jar neatly on the floor, two feet away from the cell wall.

"Zis jar ez made from ze same material az zat cell. In a day or so, Alexander will return to normal size and you will see just how unbreakable it iz." She said.

XXX

Ady was sitting on the crocodile couch reading a book and chewing absently on the strings of her sweatshirt. The girls had been coloring, but at some point Edith had left the room and had returned with a presentation board on wheels. The girls removed the drawings already fastened in place, which incidentally were still the moon heist images and they were set aside.

They spent the next hour or so drawing pictures in crayons and fastening them up on the board.

At one point Ady looked up from her book when Edith had fastened her own drawing up and had donned a scarf her father had let them have because it had been turned pink in the wash and while talking in a ridiculous hybrid accent which sounded only vaguely like Russian started going on about bombing things, particularly mentioning a place called Miss Hatties and most public schools.

It had been kind of cute at first but eventually got a bit disturbing around the time that Ady remembered that the girl was, in fact trying to imitate her father so she had carefully returned to her book and attempted ineffectively to zone out the rest of the scheme.

Then Edith's drawings were replaced with Agnes', which largely consisted of unicorns and kittens and other things of that sort.

After a while they seemed to exhaust their interest with drawing and Ady became aware that their attention had inadvertently returned to her. She lowered her book.

"We're bored now." Edith said, still wrapped up in the ludicrously big scarf.

"We aren't playing hide and seek." Ady replied, while raising the book back up to eye level. "Ever again." She added as she turned the page.

"Okay, we don't have to play hide and seek…we can do something else." Margo said while Edith jumped up on the couch and leaned over to see what Ady was reading.

"Why's the writing so tiny?"

"That's just the way it was printed." Ady replied, her shoulders slumping.

"Why aren't their pictures?"

"This is Bulgakov, there are no pictures in Bulgakov."

"What's that?"

"The writers name."

"Why's his name so funny?"

"He's Russian." She said while closing the book. "If we do something will you stop asking me questions?"

"Maybe." Ady sighed.

"What do you want to do?"

"I dunno." Edith said as she jumped off of the couch. Ady frowned at her. "But lets do _something_."

"We could go somewhere." Margo suggested.

"I don't have a car or money." She said as she set her book aside. "So unless you can find a place that's free and nearby, I'd say we're stuck here." Margo eyed Edith and Agnes briefly.

"How about the park? There's one we used to stop by sometimes when we were out selling cookies for our orphanage." Ady raised her eyebrow.

"Yeah, the park!" Agnes said brightly.

"Park huh…that'd have like…kids in it, right?" She asked while frowning slightly. "I dunno."

"Aw, come on." Edith said while crossing her arms.

Ady eyed the girls. Agnes was giving her the wide eyed, about to burst into tears look. Well, a public park at least meant that they were away from Gru's house and that was good.

"Okay." She agreed reluctantly.

"Great, it's close enough to walk." Margo added happily.

XXX

The girls preceded her along the path to the park, which _was_ in fact packed with children. Margo was holding Agnes' hand and Edith was running ahead, jumping on benches and balancing on street curbs and the like until Ady finally grabbed her by the arm to get her to stop.

"Swings!" Agnes said as she tugged at Margo's hand and they headed towards the large swing set. Edith shook free from Ady's grip and ran ahead. She sighed and stuffed her hands in her pocket and followed them while eyeing the playground equipment listlessly. She wondered vaguely if the people who made this stuff didn't secretly hate children. Everything seemed pretty dangerous and rusted easily.

A lot of the parents were sitting on the benches surrounding the park and talking to one another, while keeping a subsidiary eye on their children. On one bench near the entrance a man in glasses and a hideous sweater was talking to a young woman while his child played nearby on one of the spring toys shaped as obnoxious animals…well playing on was the wrong word. He was in fact kicking it…and the younger boy who was riding on it. His father didn't seem to be paying the boy any attention, which was frankly amazing because the child was doing everything to get it. He seemed to tire of the activity when the smaller boy fell off and ran off perhaps to _his_ mother and father.

Ady rolled her eyes and thought briefly about taking a seat on one of the benches near the swing set but then decided against it on the basis that she didn't like the idea of not having her full attention on the girls…particularly Edith.

So instead she leaned against one of the bars on the structure of the swing set; careful to keep enough distance so that she didn't get kicked and crossed her arms.

Edith had jumped onto one of the swings, and with the rubber belt tangled around her boots, leaned back precariously.

"Sit down Edith." Margo said automatically as she helped Agnes onto another swing. Edith stuck her tongue out but sank into the rubber belt anyways and started kicking off of one of the large yellow poles embedded into the ground. "And hold onto the chains, remember what happened last time." She continued. "You too Agnes." She added. Agnes held the chains tightly, a severe expression on her face.

"My hat hid the bump." Edith said under her breath. Ady frowned a little as the girl kicked off of the pole again.

"So you guys used to come here by yourselves?" She asked as Margo began to push Agnes on the swing.

"Uh huh…if we sold enough cookies for the day." Margo said.

"And it didn't bother anyone that you were walking around alone?" Margo shrugged.

"Who would it have bothered?"

"Wasn't there like…someone who watched you guys at the orphanage?"

"Yeah, but she didn't care." Margo said.

Ady raised her eyebrow and broke away from the pole. She grabbed one of Agnes's chains and Margo looked up at her questionably.

"You go swing, I'll push her." She said. Margo gave her a doubtful look but let go and hesitantly went to the swing beside them. Ady noticed with some amusement that she continued to watch her sister with trepidation. She seemed to relax after a little while though, when it became apparent that Ady wasn't going to do anything to throw Agnes off of her swing.

"I'm gonna see how far I can jump off." Edith said as she swung, getting both Ady and Margo's attention.

"Oh please don't." Ady replied, a request the girl promptly ignored. Ady, who had been holding her breath relaxed when the girl straightened from her landing spot and went back to the swing. She caught Margo's eye.

"Does she ever listen?"

"Usually after she gets hurt." Ady sighed.

After they seemed to get their fill of the swings they headed over to the jungle gym at Edith's insistence and Ady's frustration. About fifteen minutes in, while she watched the girl for any signs of doing something that might lead to her breaking her neck she felt a tug on her pant leg. Agnes who hadn't been able to get higher then the second bar on the jungle gym, had wondered over to her.

"I'm thirsty." Ady looked around briefly.

"Looks like there's some vending machines over there." She said as her gaze returned to Edith and Margo. She approached the jungle gym. "I'm getting your sister a drink." She said to Margo. "Please…please don't go anywhere…and make sure Edith doesn't…I dunno fall or shoot someone."

"How could she shoot someone?" Margo asked as Agnes took Ady's hand and started dragging her towards the vending machines.

"Hey, I'm not ruling anything out kid." She said.

When she left Margo rested her chin on her arms and eyed the rest of the park. Edith latched onto an upper bar with her knees and hung down so that her head was a foot away from her sister's.

"Be careful…just because Miss Hattie never noticed the scrapes you used to get doesn't mean dad wont." And really, that thought made her feel curiously happy, because he probably would notice, but that didn't mean she wanted to give him a reason to.

"We should ask dad to take us here. He'd make it fun." Edith said as she swung back and forth by her knees, completely ignoring Margo's warnings.

"He'd probably get us kicked out." Margo said, but she smiled a little. Their dad did make things fun. Dangerous, but fun…and it was never really dangerous for them…just for other people.

"Hey, this is my jungle gym!" The boy that Ady had noticed earlier had wondered up. Margo was snapped out of her thoughts and Edith eyed him from her upside down standpoint.

"I don't see your name on it." Edith said as she crossed her arms. The boy started climbing up.

"It's mine, get off!"

"Make us." Edith said scornfully.

"We're not leaving." Margo added with some annoyance. When he got to her level he paused briefly and then, to her surprise shoved her as hard as he could. Margo nearly fell off backwards, which would have been extremely painful as there were a lot of bars between her and the ground. She managed to keep her grip, but her glasses slipped off and fell somewhere beneath her.

"Hey!" Edith said angrily as she started to right herself. Before she could, the boy grabbed her hat. Edith's eyes widened a little as she made a grab for it. The boy jumped down, out of her grasp and there was an audible crunch as he landed on the ground. He slipped through the bars and ran off, pausing to wave the hat above his head mockingly.

Margo jumped to the ground and picked up her glasses gloomily. One of the lenses was completely shattered and the other had a few large cracks in them. She was aware of Edith landing near her, before the girl took off after the boy.

"Edith wait!" She crawled out from the bars and took a few steps in the direction her sister had run, but without her glasses everything became a blur. Someone grabbed her arm.

"I told you to stay put!" Ady said as she pulled the girl back. She looked around. "Where's your sister?"

"She ran after a boy who stole her hat." Margo said. "He stepped on my glasses." Margo added bitterly. Ady took the shattered glasses from the girl's hand.

"Great, we'll worry about this later…right now…"

There was a loud scream that echoed over the playground, causing Ady's next words to die in her throat. It was probably the sort of scream that plagued the nightmares of ever parent of a small child, at least those who cared. There was something bloodcurdling about a child's scream…granted, with kids it was hard to tell if they were being brutally murdered, or had just got stung by a bee. Though it had been high-pitched, it was definitely a boy's scream.

"Oh dammit." Ady said as she straightened. "Stay here." She added in a growl to Margo and Agnes as she headed in that direction.

Edith had run after the boy, who had foolishly stopped in order to hold her hat over his head and mock her. In normal circumstances, when a boy did this to a girl who was smaller and younger then him, she'd break into tears or make pathetic grabs for it or run and get her parents. Edith just punched him in the nose.

A look of comical surprise crossed his features, then he dropped the hat and upon realizing that his nose was bleeding began to scream and cry before he ran towards his father, who was still absorbed in the young blonde woman.

Edith picked up the hat and shoved it back on her head as Ady came up behind her. She looked up at the woman with a hint of guilty defiance.

"Did you just break that kids nose?" Ady asked, her words forming a kind of accusation. Ady watched as the boy's father finally looked up as his son approached. His face, which had worn a slightly frustrated expression at being interrupted, contorted into horror and then anger and a moment later he looked up at her and Edith and stood.

"Aw, crap." Ady said. Margo and Agnes had wondered up, despite being told to stay…but Ady didn't say anything, mainly because she was watching the large furious man who was bearing down on her.

"Edith." Margo scolded below her breath.

"He took my hat." Edith mumbled back. "And he pushed you." She added.

"Are you with her?" The man asked when he advanced, while pointing at Edith and stopping close enough to Ady so as to be intimidating, his glasses glinting in the sunlight.

"Uh yeah, I'm really s-." Ady started warily.

"Your daughter hit my son!" He interrupted her. "I think his nose is broken!"

"Look, I'm not-" Ady started again, with some annoyance.

"Maybe you ought to teach your kids some damn manners!" Ady's eyes flashed a little. Behind her, Margo had unconsciously positioned herself between Edith and the screaming man.

"Them?" She said, whatever she had been about to say forgotten. "Hey man, she was just defending herself! Your kid started it." She pulled out the shattered glasses, which she had stuffed in her pocket. "He stole her hat and broke her sister's glasses." She added while gesturing to Margo.

"That doesn't give her the right to punch my kid!" He said while pointing angrily at Edith.

"Well maybe now he'll think twice about picking on little girls if he knows they can beat the crap out of him!"

"I'm going to have to go to the emergency room and who's going to pay for that huh?" He shouted spittle flying from his mouth.

"Yeah, well maybe if you didn't have your head shoved up you're a-"

"Um, Ady maybe we should just go." Margo said, while grabbing at her hand and getting her attention. Ady shook her free.

"One second Margo."

"Oh believe me, if you don't go I'll have you escorted out and I'll make sure you and those brats aren't allowed in here again. It makes me sick that people like you just let their kids run around with decent people." Ady froze for a second and then a moment later the man stumbled backwards because she took a swing at him.

XXX

"Okay…" Ady said, after they'd put some distance between them and the park. "That…was probably a bad idea."

"You gave that guy a black eye." Edith said, with some admiration.

Because his glasses had been in the way, she'd cracked one of the lenses. There were now tiny cuts all over her knuckles because of it, but he'd definitely gotten it worse. He had shouted any number of curse words and obscenities at her, which she imagined some of the kids at the park had never heard before today and would lead to some unfortunate explanations on their parents' part.

"I don't think we should go back there for a while." Ady said. "Sorry." She added.

"It's okay…if dad had been there it would have been a lot worse." Margo said. Ady tried to imagine what Gru would have done in the same situation and frowned a little.

"I guess it was that guy's lucky day." Ady replied. She pulled Margo's glasses out of her pocket again. "Speaking of your dad, he's probably not going to be happy about this." She said with some uneasiness.

"It wasn't your fault." Margo said with a shrug. Ady sighed. It would be nice if just one day went by without incident.

XXX

When Gru pulled the tank up into the driveway it was seven o' clock. He hadn't intended to be home so early and had actually considered coming back a little later because part of him resented the idea of being given any sort of curfew, but eventually he'd decided that whatever qualms he had with Ady didn't change the fact that he actually would prefer to get home before the girls went to bed…particularly if he were already leaving earlier in the morning. So he'd excused himself from Polina's company, saying something about getting to work in the lab but with the full intent of spending the extra time with the girls.

Plus, he was exhausted and by the end of the day it wasn't just about the lack of sleep. There was something about Polina's company that just sapped at his energy and his nerves. Maybe some of it was envy. But he also couldn't shake the feeling that he was losing control of the situation. Then again, he wasn't just having that problem with her, was he?

Gru sighed heavily as he stepped in the door and set his things aside. He smiled a little when the girls came to greet him and Agnes latched onto his leg.

"Daddy's home!" She proclaimed.

"Heelo Agnes." Gru said as he picked the youngest girl up.

"Your home early." Margo said with a smile. He returned her smiled and then raised his eyebrow questionably.

"Where are your glasses?" Margo's smile faded a little.

"Er…" She started as she headed into the other room. Gru frowned and followed her. They were sitting on the end table. Margo picked them up and handed them to him.

"How deed thees happen?" He asked as he put Agnes down.

When Margo began to recount the story Gru's initial reaction was anger, although there was a bit of fear in the back of his mind as well, fueled by the idea of the girls being out of the house somewhere where he couldn't help them. Some might argue that they could get in more trouble _in_ the house, but there were always thousands of minions around as well as Dr. Nefario and they would make sure that nothing too bad happened.

"Where ees thee babyseetor?" He said angrily as he straightened.

"She's in the kitchen making dinner." Margo said apprehensively. She grabbed his hand as he started in that direction. "Dad." She said hurriedly. He scowled.

"Eet could 'ave been worse then just breaking your glasses, you could 'ave broken your neck!"

"But it wasn't her fault."

"Yah, and what deed she do about eet?"

"She punched a guy." Edith said with approval.

"I'm not just going to seet back…what?" He halted as his thought process was derailed slightly.

"She gave the kid's dad a black eye." Margo said.

"He got his glasses broke…he shouted a lot." Agnes added happily.

"Don't do anything to make her quit again, dad." Margo added. She didn't think that she could get her back a second time if he did. Gru sighed, relaxing slightly.

"I weel not make her queet, but I am still going to talk to her. I'll take these to Nefario and see eef he can feex them for you." He added as he pocketed the glasses.

XXX

Ady had been in the process of attempting to make spaghetti again, hopefully with more success this time…and without setting fire to anything, when Gru, who could be unnervingly silent sometimes, approached her from behind.

"I weel say this briefly…" He started. She started and half of the dry noodles in the box she had just opened spilled out onto the counter. She frowned and scowled at him.

"God, can't you enter a room like a normal person." She said as she picking the noodles up. He watched her bewilderedly. "What, do you do pad your shoes?"

"That ees beside thee point." He said finally. "I promised Margo I would not do anything to make you queet, but if you leave thee gurls by themselves ever again you will have wished you 'ave never met me."

"Yeah, well that's a real stretch from what I wish now. I left them for two minutes, within eye shot and it was just because Agnes wanted a drink and I didn't want to ask the other girls to follow us over there." She said. "If your upset about the glasses then I'll pay for them, but it's kind of ridiculous to be scolding me about putting your daughters lives in danger, considering there's a damn chainsaw right over there." Gru opened his mouth angrily and then shut it again. He sighed and rubbed at his eyes.

"I do not care about thee glasses…I can 'ave them feexed easily. Just…don't…do eet…again."

"Fine." Ady said angrily.

"Fine!" He responded below his breath, in a growl. "What are you doing to my keetchen?" He added, after a moment when he became aware of his surroundings.

"I'm making spaghetti." She said crossly.

"Thees ees spaghetti?" He asked.

"Well not yet." She said defensively. He picked up the old cookbook, which she had brought with her, turning it over slightly to look at the cover. After a moment he threw it in the trash.

"Hey!" Ady said as he opened the cabinet above the stove and fished briefly through the books there. "That…what…that was my cookbook!"

"Eet was garbage." He said as he removed a book from the pile and started searching through it.

"Well then it was my garbage!" She said as he picked the pot of noodles up and dumped them in the sink. He handed her the book.

"That ees spaghetti." He said as he opened a pantry door and pulled his apron from a hook on the inside.

"I don't know how to make noodles…or real spaghetti sauce…" Ady said dully as he tied his apron behind his back.

"Well you can start by throwing that mix away and getting out thee ingredients..." He said. She frowned and slid the mix into the garbage.

"Look, if you want to do this, be my guest." She said as she set the book down heavily.

"Technically," Gru said, surprising her by grabbing her by the arm. "You work until eight." Ady pulled her arm from his grip.

"Yeah, the whole babysitting thing doesn't really work like that."

"You 'ave previous experience? Besides, Margo usually helps me and because you got her glasses broken, she cannot." Ady rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, well I seem to remember prolonged exposure to you as being against my conditions."

"Queeting kind of made those condeetions moot. You deed not reinstate them thee second time." He said smugly as he handed her a wooden spoon. Ady eyed it briefly before grabbing it from him.

"What do you want me to do?" She asked frustratingly.

"For now, read me thee directions." He said. Ady picked the cookbook up and eyed the recipe. "Deed you really geeve dat keeds father a black eye?" Gru added as he placed a pan on the burner.

"Uhuh, wanna see if I can try for two?" Gru glowered but said nothing.

XXX

Wee! I've been dying to write all week and not getting a chance to. When my laptop got stolen I lost two or three of the projects I was working on for school and had to basically do them all over again, so I've been tied up all week. All caught up now though. ^^ Also, I should be getting my new laptop fairly soon, possibly even soon enough so that I can finish the next chapter on it. (dances a little)

I'm so sick of sitting in this chair in the dining room on my parent's computer. Especially working on school stuff. I go to an art college and half of the stuff I do is digital. I had some nice programs on my old comp…but this one is terrible so all I could do is download a really old version of Photoshop…and for some reason it's refusing to acknowledge my waccom tablet…I think maybe they had a disagreement back when this was my sisters laptop. I seem to remember her complaining about it. Ne ways…I am starting to ramble. Hopefully the chapter came out all right. I need to get off so my dad can check his farm on facebook.


	10. The Art Of Clinking

Chapter Nine:

The Art of Clinking

Polina was sitting on a large chaise lounge in her living room. If one were looking at her they might think that she was posing for a photo. She was draped across the lounge gracefully, which was adorned with throws and pillows made up of various fabrics and furs. She herself was wearing a large fur coat, which was spread out on the cushions and was drinking a glass of her special wine.

As usual, Doug was nearby, silent. There was no indication that any sort of thought process was going on behind his severe expression.

Polina was twirling her glass in her fingers and watching the wine slosh in its depths, like someone trying to mix cream into coffee in an arbitrary sort of way.

She had spent ten years building up her plan and another three trying to find someone who could help her accomplish it. When she had told Perkins that she had started with a list of villains and narrowed it down to Gru, she had not been entirely truthful. She _had_ started with a list of villains, but she didn't thin it down to him, he hadn't even been on the list. She could even vaguely remember seeing his name in her search at some point and passing on it.

Her interest in him ad started with the moon heist. Perkins had bragged that it was his son's idea, but she had already previously decided that the only way that kid could _plan_ anything was if he were given step-by-step instructions written in big orange letters, not to mention the kid was in his early twenties. Polina was in her late thirties and was very much repulsed by the idea of being trailed by someone who was still wet behind the ears. After digging a little she'd come up with Gru's name.

He'd been inactive…or so close to it that he might as well have been for as long as she'd been plotting. He was old fashioned, he relied on a scientist that was almost twice as old as him…which was worrying and he'd been reduced to committing crimes that frankly, were laughable. But the more she looked into it the more she was certain that it had been his plan to steal the moon and what was more important, he had succeeded. It was too bad about the shrink ray, but still, that sort of thing was impressive in any context.

She'd looked up almost everything on Gru and what she gathered from the information was that what he wanted, above anything was to _be_ a villain. He had never been married, had no personal relationships, no hobbies that didn't pertain to his job in some way, he practically was his job. Some people you could manipulate with greed, some people with threats, some with blackmail or something they wanted but with Gru it was easy. Her leverage with him was basically _allowing_ him to help her.

And he was exactly as she predicted he would be. Or so it had seemed. In fact he was proving to be a bit of challenge. Normally she was able to have men like him wrapped around her finger, but he was resisting. She didn't even think he was doing it on purpose, which was even more infuriating. She made casual advances on him and they were contested or ignored.

It wasn't just this that bothered her though. She was beginning to find even his general behavior quite puzzling. At times he seemed uncomplicated, cruel and callous; a classic villain all over, but quite often she'd find him unfocused or he would do something that she would've thought would be out of character for someone like him.

And there were those kids too. It wasn't as if other villains didn't have kids…but most of them had been married and their children usually took after them. Villains, especially villains like Gru did not go out and adopt three girls on a whim, particularly three girls that appeared in many respects to be hopelessly and distressingly ordinary. At first she had assumed he was up to something, but every time she brought it up in casual conversation he would change the subject and become almost protective.

She was also a little worried about how he had been acting the last couple of days. First he had cancelled the day before. Then, when he'd showed up today he'd mentioned about leaving before eight o' clock from then on and had been vague as to why and then, after she'd showed him the confinement center where she was keeping their captors and had taken care of Alexander and any future escape attempts on the part of the imprisoned gentlemen he had excused himself, mumbling some sort of excuse before taking off.

She sighed. They were too far in the plan now. After you kidnapped the presidents of various countries you couldn't really put them back until the time was better was better for you, but she'd have to keep her eye on him.

"More wine, Doug." She said while raising her glass. The hulking man took it from her silently.

XXX

Gru looked sideways at the young woman for a second before returning his eyes to the task of making the spaghetti sauce. She was forming meatballs while the noodles simmered in another pot. It occurred to him that making spaghetti with her aid really wasn't going to improve his situation very much. What had Nefario said? He didn't have to talk to her or be around her? So why was he doing this again?

At the moment he admitted some morbid curiosity. Why was this girl still here? He was almost certain that anyone else would have quit long ago and moved across the country or something.

Ady, who felt his gaze on her shot him a dark look. He made a failed attempt to appear as if he had been looking at the cookbook and then wondered vaguely why he did it. It was almost like backing down. After a moment she surprised him by speaking. Up until then it had been completely silent apart from Gru's occasional instructions.

"So, is this what you do when you're not shooting people? You make spaghetti and cake?" She asked cynically. Gru scowled.

"Unlike you, when I poison people I like eet to be intentional." He responded.

"Do you wear the pink apron for that too?" She added casually. He shot her a glare, which she ignored. For the second time that week he felt like he was losing a battle he hadn't even realized he'd been fighting. This was really beginning to get on his nerves.

"Eef eet were not for thee fact that my gurls like you so much, you would find smart comments like that to be veery unfortunate." He said quietly and with some weariness. She looked at him, giving him her full attention. She'd even stopped forming the meatballs.

"You know threats don't work when you're wearing an apron like that, don't you?" She said soberly. Before Gru was able to react she reached down to where the pocket of the apron was and tugged at the small unicorn that had been placed there by Agnes at some point without Gru noticing. She handed it to him. "This doesn't help." She added before returning to the meatballs. Gru stood there holding it for a moment, slightly flustered. Finally he set it down on the counter top.

"I liked eet better when you were afraid 'ove me." He said bitterly.

"Yeah, well I liked it better when I didn't know you." She responded.

XXX

After a while when her father had not returned, Margo started to get a little uneasy and went to the kitchen to make sure that he had kept his word. Her sisters followed her for lack of something better to do. She wasn't sure what she had been expecting but cooking had not been it. Because her vision was slightly blurry she nudged Edith a little.

"What are they doing?"

"Looks like they're making spaghetti." She responded.

"Ooh spaghetti!" Agnes said while rushing happily into the kitchen. This got both Gru and Ady's attention.

"Deener ees almost ready gurls, seet down at thee table." He said.

"Uhhh…okay." Margo responded, slightly mystified. "Come on Agnes." She added. Agnes had been trying to climb up onto the island in the middle of the kitchen, but halted in her efforts and followed Margo instead.

When the spaghetti was finished Gru removed his apron and began searching the upper cabinets for plates. He removed four and set them in front of the girls. He also handed Agnes her stuffed unicorn.

"I belive thees ees yours." Agnes took it with a smile.

"Yay, I couldn't member where I put it." Gru gave her a slightly piqued smile, but it was clear that there was no real venom in it. Ady had grabbed her bag off of the counter and slung it over her shoulder.

"You're not staying for dinner?" Margo asked. Both Gru and Ady sounded with protests at the same time and then glared at each other. In the mean time Agnes slid off of her chair and a moment later was clutched to Ady's leg. She eyed her bewilderedly.

"What are you doing?" She asked uncomfortably.

"Don't go, stay for spaketti."

"It's eight o' clock and your dad's back, there's no reason for me to stay. Come on, this is…will you stop." She said as she made an attempt to pry the girl from her leg. She looked up to Margo for help, but she was just smiling amusedly. Gru, who had been watching this with perplexed dismay, broke away from the table.

"She ees not going to eat weeth us, Agnes." He said as he kneeled down and attempted to remove his daughter from the woman's leg. She just clutched on tighter. "How do you…'ave such a strong grip…when you are so leetle?" He said with a grunt, as Agnes climbed up a little higher, like a particularly skittish cat. He made another attempt to loosen her grip but became suddenly uncomfortably aware that at some point in his efforts he'd unconsciously rested his free hand on Ady's thigh for leverage and to keep his balance. He let go of both the leg and Agnes as if he'd been stung and met Ady's disturbed and slightly flushed expression.

Gru straightened and cleared his throat in an attempt to hide his embarrassment and when he spoke next tried to express some authority.

"Come on, Agnes, let her go." He said. "I mean eet, I am not playing here. I weel count to tree." He added. Behind him, Margo and Edith shared a look. "One…two…two and a half…"

A few moments later Ady was sitting at the table dismally with her chin in her palm while Gru got another plate. Margo was sitting across from her and had her arms crossed on the table's surface and Edith was kicking the underside of it in a bored manner. Beside her Agnes was playing with her unicorn blissfully.

"Plez stop keeking thee table, Edith." Gru said as he steadied a glass that was theatending to spill over. He then set the plate down and began scooping out helpings of spaghetti with a stormy expression on his face. When he finished with that he sat down next to Margo with a sigh.

Ady straightened in her seat and poked at a meatball on the plate with her fork while eyeing Gru obscurely through a few stray red hairs. At least she knew he wasn't going to poison her…not from the same food he was feeding his daughters in any case. Of course he could have done something with the plate. Ady, paused and eyed it suspiciously for a moment, then discarded the notion, mainly because she was actually quite hungry and the spaghetti smelled really good.

It was in fact the best spaghetti she had ever eaten. Actually considering the food her and Dillon tended to stick to; it was probably the best meal she had eaten in a really long time.

"Hey look, it looks like blood and guts." Edith said from beside Margo while leaning over towards the girl and displaying her plate.

"Thanks Edith, I really needed that image while I eat." Margo replied.

"Eet looks nothing like blood and guts. Dey are far more peenk." Gru said while he rolled some of the spaghetti onto his fork. He caught Margo's expression and cleared his throat. "Stop freaking your seestor out, Edith."

Beside Ady, Agnes had tried ineffectively to get her own spaghetti wrapped around her fork and was making tiny pouting sounds whenever it fell off again. Ady looked sideways at her with her own fork half raised. She lowered it after a moment and gently took the utensil from the little girl.

"You keep going on like that and you're going to starve, kid." She said as spun the fork in the spaghetti for her. Agnes watched closely as if there were some secret art to it and then took the fork from her and gave her a bright smile before shoving it in her mouth and promptly getting sauce all over her face. Ady smiled amusedly. She could feel Gru's gaze on her and met his expression, which was mostly unreadable.

When they finished eating Ady once again shouldered her bag. Margo had begun taking up the plates but Gru dissuaded her and sent her and Edith to get ready for bed and he was currently kneeling next to Agnes and wiping at her face, while she kicked her feet happily.

"There ees spaghetti sauce on your forehead…and een your hair. How deed you manage thees?" He asked. When Agnes' face was clean he helped her off of the seat.

"Will you read to us tonight?"

"Yes, go brush your teeth."

"Will you read us your book?"

"Yes, all right, go geet ready and I will be up in a meenut." Agnes bounded off, pausing long enough to hug Ady's leg, much to the woman's bewilderment.

Gru straightened and started to gather the dishes. Ady resigned to quietly let herself out and was therefore somewhat surprised when she heard her ask him if he wanted any help.

"No." Gru responded, while casting a precursory glance towards her.

"All right then." She said as she zipped up her sweatshirt and pulled her cell phone out. "By the way, which days should I be taking off this week?"

"What are you talking about?" Gru asked as he rolled his sleeves up and turned on the sink.

"Days off…two of them. This week." She said slowly.

"I don't remember agreeing to dat."

"Well you did." Ady said as she started dialing the number of a cab service. Gru sighed.

"Whatever, I don't care." He said.

"Okay, I'll take tomorrow off then." Ady said with a smile before she headed towards the door.

"Hey, wait…you…" Gru started. He sighed and set the plates back in the sink and followed her while wringing his hands.

"You cannot take tomorrow off. Peeck a deeferent day." He said as he caught up with her while she was standing in the open doorway.

"Hmm, ok. How about Thursday? That way you can take them to dance class and sit with the soccer moms." She said as stepped out and closed the door behind her. Gru raised his eyebrow at the closed door before returning to the kitchen.

XXX

_He opened his eyes to find, in front of him, a glass wall. After a moment he reached forward and touched it curiously with his slender fingers, before balling them up into a fist and rapping his knuckles on it. As he stepped back his shoes echoed on the floor beneath him. The floor was also glass. Gru frowned and turned on his heel. Glass ,glass all around him. _

_"What ees dees?" He said, listening to his voice as it bounced off of the walls. Suddenly a shadow fell over him. He looked up to find himself peering into the dark iris of a massive eye. It blinked once and then pulled back to reveal Polina's sharp features. _

_"Hello Gru." She said as he dark oily lips stretched across her pale slender face. _

_"Hey! Let me out 'ove here!" Gru said while pointing an accusing finger at her. _

_"And what happens eef I do not?" She responded. Gru growled and reached into his coat, but much to his dismay he was weaponless. Polina laughed in a low spine-chilling manner and with long white fingers pulled a wine bottle towards here. _

_"Have some wine Gru." She said as she tipped the bottle over the jar. Gru covered his head with his arm as the red liquid poured over him. "It will not be long now." She added before retreating. _

_He straightened and sloshed through the red liquid, eyeing the top of the jar for some clue as to how to get out. Suddenly the jar shook and rose and he was thrown down into the wine. _

_"Agh," He exclaimed as he flicked some of the liquid from his fingers and attempted to steady himself despite the shaking of the container around him. A pair of somewhat bored green eyes, framed with red hair and resting above a mass of freckles were fixed on him with devious curiosity. Ady raised her eyebrow and then shook the jar vigorously. Gru lost his footing again. "Stop dat!" Gru exclaimed. _

_She regarded him with amusement and then began moving, the jar still in her hand. Gru watched alarmingly as through the slightly distorted glass he could see his front hall, adorned with all of his trophies and ornaments. When they got to the door she opened it and stood on the front step for a moment before raising the jar to eye level again. _

_"You really think _you _could take over the world?" She said as she raised the jar up higher above her head. "You don't even have control over your own life anymore." She added before heaving the jar towards his neighbor's house. Light filled Gru's vision as the jar flashed with the electricity from Gru's fence. _

XXX

Gru shouted and sat up in bed, instinctively throwing his hand up to deter the electricity. Then he shouted again when it struck one of the spikes on his headboard. He grabbed his hand and slipped off of the side of his mattress onto the floor, the blankets tangled in his legs.

There was a faint knock on the door, causing Gru to stop trying to struggle to his feet.

"Yes." He said, his voice slightly muffled.

"Dad?" It was Margo's voice.

"What ees eet Margo?" Gru said with a grunt as he got to his knees.

"Um…it's eleven o' clock. Uncle Nefario called on the television screen and is wondering where you are."

"Eleven…in thee morning!" Gru scrambled to his feet and from the other side of the door Margo heard a series of crashes as he freed himself from the blankets and backed into the dresser, sending a few of the books on it's surface tumbling to the floor. A moment later the door swung open and Margo stepped back. "Unbelievable, now I am going to be late." He said.

"Uhh…dad." She said carefully.

"Just a meenut, Margo." He said as he hurried down the stairs.

Ady was standing in the hall with her arms crossed and was giving Agnes her attention while the girl showed her a picture she had drawn.

"See an this is the unicorn an he's got wings innis picture and is flying to a magical castle and that's you." She said while pointing at a blobby humanoid atop the unicorn. Ady raised her eyebrow as she peered closer.

"That's um…that's great Agnes." She said awkwardly. "What's uh…what's that thing growing out of my head?"

"It's your crown, your a princess."

"Oh…yeah…of course it is."

Upon seeing her, Gru remembered that his silk pajamas had been in the wash the night before and because of this he was, in fact standing in the hall in his underwear. He tried ineffectively to return to the stairway, nearly walked into Margo and gave up because the woman had already noticed him. She made a noise in the back of her throat that sounded a bit like a suppressed laugh and Gru made an attempt to square his shoulders and tried to compose himself. Judging by her expression it wasn't working so instead he glared at her and headed into the living room.

Dr. Nefario was on the large screen and had been picking some lint of off his lab coat. When he saw Gru he straightened.

"Oh, Gru, there you are…why are you in your underwear?"

"Not important." Gru said irately. "Do me a favor. Call Polina and tell hor I weel be…"

"Well see…that's kind of why I called. She sent a message this morning saying that she'd very much like to see the work we're doing in the lab and she'd be over shortly."

"What?" Gru said, horrified. "When deed she call?"

"Twenty minutes ago…I would suggest wearing something a bit more…well formal." It was at this moment that the doorbell rang. Gru's eyes widened.

"Stall her!" He said before hurrying out of the room.

"Gru, wait! I can't do anything from down here!"

XXX

Ady exchanged a look with Margo as Gru ran past them and mounted the stairs two at a time. The doorbell rang again.

"Uh should I get the door?" Margo called after her father. It was too late, he had already rushed out. She looked at Ady, who shrugged.

Margo headed cautiously towards the door and opened it. Polina's sharp gaze was fixed upward, as she clearly expected to be greeted by Gru. Her irises swiveled down when she saw that this was not so. Behind her, Doug loomed, a thing he did with great skill.

"Eez Gru here?" She asked as she stuck the black ivory cigarette holder in her mouth and regarded Margo coldly.

"He's…uh upstairs." Margo said. The woman continued to look at her with her sharp black eyes. "You can…come in I guess." She added while backing up uneasily.

Polina stepped inside, her coat drifting around her. Her eyes swept over the hall briefly, taking in all of Gru's decoration.

"Hmm, interesting décor." She said as Doug stepped through the door after her and fixed his empty eyes on Ady and the girls.

"Why does your coat have so many little aminals on it?" Ady heard Agnes ask from her side. The little girl became subject to Polina's gaze and Ady felt her move a little closer to her. For a moment it seemed as if Polina might just carefully erase the girl from the room and ignore her, but after exhaling a fine stream of smoke, which smelled of exotic spices, she spoke.

"Et ez mad 'ove civets, zey are teeny teeny creatures and much eez needed to make a full coat."

"So you're wearing a coat with dead animals on it?" Edith said.

"Zey were not dead when zey were sewn togezzer for ze hide." She said casually. "Zay were hung for three days until ze struggling stopped. Zis ez sometimes necessary for small sings." She said with a smile. Margo looked up at Ady, who had moved forward instinctively, so that she was between the dark woman and her and her sisters.

"It's kind of ugly." Edith said. Polina's eyes flashed a little.

"Okay, time to go into the other room!" Ady said loudly, while grabbing at Edith's resisting arm and motioning for Margo to precede her. Margo cast Polina a slightly wary look before taking Agnes' hand and heading into the kitchen.

"Do you have any sense of self preservation?" Ady hissed at Edith.

"What, it's an ugly coat." She said, probably loudly enough so that the woman could still hear her from the hall.

A moment later the lift came up from the lab and Dr. Nefario surfaced, looking slightly tired.

"Oh, I see you've been let in." He said as he approached Polina and Doug.

"Yes, so I 'ave. Eet eez good to see you in person, Dr. Nefario." She added, while offering him her hand gracefully. "You are looking well."

"Likewise." He replied as he took it.

"Out of curiosity, who waz zat woman?"

"What woman? Oh, you mean Miss Owens. She's no one. Gru hired her to watch the girls while you and him worked." He said dismissively. "If you'll step this way we can go down into the lab while we wait for Gru."

"He hired a common babysitter to come to his house?" She asked as she and Doug followed Nefario to the lift.

"Yes well, we had to get someone."

"Well if you like I could provide him wiz a nanny."

"Oh well, you'll have to take that up with him I'm afraid." He said.

XXX

"Friends of your dads?" Ady asked cynically as she sat on one of the stools at the counter.

"He's working with her." Margo answered.

"I don't like her." Agnes said. "And that man is scary."

"Yeah, and he doesn't have a tongue." Edith added, as if she were eager to provide this detail.

"I was…kind of hoping that that was just my imagination." Ady said with a sigh.

"Could I be made into a coat like the vic…civ...et?" Agnes said while tugging on Margo's sleeve.

"Probably," Edith said from behind her before the older girl could speak. "She said they were tiny creatures." Agnes looked at Margo with wide eyes.

"She can't make us into coats, Agnes." Margo said while shooting Edith a look.

"We should probably stay away from the living room in case someone comes up from the lab." She added while looking at Ady.

"Okay, what do you want to do then?" She asked, while eyeing the door. To her the woman had looked like a villain out of a children's cartoon, what with her sharp features, her tight black dress, the cigarette holder and her massive fur coat. In fact, all the image needed was Gru. A sleek dark woman next to a slightly hunched hooknosed bald Russian psychopath. It might have been funny if it weren't for the fact that it _wasn't_ a cartoon. That woman had been creepy.

"We could have a tea party." Agnes said happily, snapping her out of her thoughts. Ady raised her eyebrow.

"A tea party?" Margo smiled.

"Yeah, we haven't done that in a while. Maybe we could make like…cookies and stuff too." Margo said.

"Yeah!" Agnes said excitedly. "And I could bring my big unicorn."

"You guys want to make cookies and have a tea party? _Really_?" She asked. "No hide and seek, no let's go somewhere or let's play with things that might explode?"

"Uh huh, why not?"

"It just sounds…really I dunno…Hallmarky." Ady said while running her hand through her hair.

"Aw come on." Edith said while grabbing her other hand and tugging on it.

"Where are we going to get stuff for cookies?"

"I bet dad has it." Margo said brightly.

"I've never made cookies before." Agnes said happily.

"Yeah, we used to sell them a lot though." Edith said while sticking out her tongue.

Ady allowed herself to be yanked off of the chair.

"All right…but I can't promise they're going to be edible."

XXX

After he got dressed Gru headed down to the lab. He stepped off of the lift and walked towards Doctor Nefario and Polina with his hands folded behind his back.

"Sorry I am late…" He said while casting a brief unsettled look at Doug who seemed to be absorbed in the actions of some of his minions. Polina gave him a malicious smile.

"Your doctor Nefario was just showing me ze atomizer he ez designing. I waz wondering eef you could give me a demonstration."

"Uhh, okay…" He said as he leaned nearer to Dr. Nefario. "Ees eet ready?" He whispered.

"Probably."

"Probably?" The doctor shrugged. Gru straightened again. "Sure, no problemo, a demonstration. We just need to find something to test eet on." Polina's eyes swept over the lab briefly.

"Just use one 'ove your minions." She said as she loaded her ivory holder with another cigarette. Gru shared a look with Nefario.

"We don't usually use them to test thee deadly experiments."

"Not intentionally, anyways." The doctor added. "Sometimes I make unfortunate miscalculations."

"Why not? You seem to 'ave Sousands 'ove zem." She said while indicating the massive room.

"Well, thee reason dat dere are so many of dem ees dat we usually do not deesintigrate dem." He said with some annoyance.

A couple of the closer minions were observing the conversation. One of them nudged another and pointed at Polina.

"Nan ga te dijo no?" The other looked at him.

"Poof, Desheredo." He said while making a complicated motion with his hands.

"Ooohhh." The first one said dismally. "Perra"

"Hank!" Gru said. The minion who had just been speaking swallowed and approached him. "Go find something to put in thee atomizer." He said. Polina raised her eyebrow as he turned back to her.

A little while later they were setting the machine up after Hank located a large metal scrap that was lying around unused. Dr. Nefario strapped the thing in and after ensuring that the binds were tight, gave Gru a thumbs up before retreating behind a safe wall. The machine itself looked a little bit like a complicated row of electric chairs underneath large bulbous hairdryers. Polina and Gru were standing behind the control panel.

"May I?" Polina asked while indicating the lever. Gru nodded warily and crossed his arms, and hidden from her, his fingers as well. She pulled it and there was a flash. A moment later Gru and Polina picked themselves off of the ground after nearly being hit by hot flaming metal debris.

"Well, eet may need a leetle work." Gru said while brushing off his coat.

"So et would seem." She replied.

XXX

Ady had never made cookies either, not even with her mother when she was young. The closest she had ever come was buying one of those nestle cookie packs that came in weird pre cut cookie dough squares.

She'd fished Gru's cookbook out of the cabinet again and had found a recipe for cookies which of course had to be made form scratch and had begun looking for ingredients, while part of her secretly hoped that Gru would not have them. No such luck. For some reason the man seemed to have everything in his kitchen. He even had chocolate chips. She mentioned this to Margo.

"Those are probably left over from the pancakes the other day." The girl responded.

"Well, it's all here. Lets try not to burn the kitchen down. Can you see?" She asked the older girl. She shrugged.

"Up close." She was eyeing the recipe. "It doesn't look all that hard." She added.

"Okay where do we start?" Ady asked while leaning over the book.

Margo thought later that it would have been a lot easier if Agnes and Edith were able to help properly. She'd given Agnes a few easy ingredients to add, which she herself re-added inconspicuously because most of the time Agnes wound up getting stuff on the counter rather then in the bowl, and Edith seemed more interested in making a mess.

When Ady went to add the last ingredient they needed she heard a soft sound from behind her followed by a loud crash. She turned around slowly, as if slightly afraid of what she might see to find that Edith had pried one of the large heavy things, of which he did not know the use...or relenace to in a kitchen area, loose from the wall.

"Oops." The girl said, before dropping the object and stepping away from it, as if doing this would release her from blame.

After all of the ingredients for the dough was added to the bowl, Ady located an eggbeater, which she put together inexpertly and plugged in.

"Ohh can I try?" Edith asked while leaning over the counter.

"Uhh…" Ady looked sideways at Margo who shrugged. "Okay but try not too…" Before she could finish her sentence the girl grabbed it and flipped the switch, sending batter flying out of the bowl and all over the countertop. Ady took it from her and turned it off.

"That was fun." Edith said. Ady sighed.

"I think I had better do this." She said carefully before she started it again and carefully mixed the batter while the girls watched. After a while she shut it off and eyed it curiously.

"Looks okay to me." Margo said from beside her.

"Can we lick off of the sticks?" Edith added.

"Uh, yeah okay…there are only two though."

"That's all right, they can have them." Margo said as she broke away from the counter to grab the cookbook. Ady eyed her briefly before she broke the silver mixers off and gave them to Edith and Agnes. Then after searching briefly through the drawer the beater had been kept in, she found a spare. Margo watched curiously as she spun it briefly in the dough and then handed it to her. The girl took it with some surprise.

"Uh thanks." She said.

They spread the cooking sheet out on the counter and began to roll the dough into balls and place them on the sheet.

"Yours are looking kind of oblong Agnes." Ady said with a smile before wiping her hand absently across her forehead and leaving a streak of flour. Margo looked up at her and smiled a little.

XXX

After leaving the machine to doctor Nefario so he might make some adjustments Polina had insisted on being shown the rest of the lab, which Gru did with some apprehension. It didn't help that Doug was trailing a few steps behind him, eyeing everything with uncharacteristic attentiveness.

"What ez zis?" She asked while indicating a large metal construction which ended in a small cylinder.

"A lazer." Gru said.

"Ahh, strap a man on a table with a slow moving lazer very…old fashioned. Do you use et often?"

"Actually, eet has not worked properly for a while now. Thee power ees too low, mostly Dr. Nefario uses eet to heat up his tea or soup." Gru said. He caught her expression. "I suppose you could still use it on a person, but you'd 'ave to go over them several times."

"Well, et would give zem time to sink anyways. Where does zat door go to?" She asked while indicating a large door nearby.

"Dat ees actually my wine cellor."

"Oh, I see, may I 'ave a look?" Gru shrugged and opened the door. She walked down inside the small room curiously and eyed the racks. There were only about twenty bottles on them currently. He had a few more in the kitchen, but for the most part they were not quite as extravagant.

"Excelso, 1950…rare, Chateau Mouton, Screaming Eagle. Impressive, zis would be your Chateau Margaux, yes?" She said as she took one of the bottles up in her long fingers.

"Yes, eet ees my last bottle."

"1982. Very good, so zis would come to about Three thousand and five hundred dollars, would et not?" Gru nodded. She smiled.

"Well," She said as she replaced the bottle. "Perhaps we will find an occasion to opeen et up." She said as she ran a finger across Gru's chest on her way out of the cellar. Gru cleared his throat awkwardly and closed the door.

"I was going to ask if you would let me borrow ze Shrink Ray for a little while?" She said as the continued to walk down one of large tunnels which would eventually lead to the large room with the stage.

"Why?" Gru asked suspiciously.

"I 'ave a few more sings to acquire and et would help me a lot."

"Well, I suppose…dat eet would be all right" He said uncomfortably. "I think I left eet upstairs. I weel go and geet eet." He added.

XXX

Some of the cookies hadn't turned out all that well. The first batch of them had been put too close together so it had resulted in a strange cookie mass and in the second batch Edith had tried to make a couple huge cookies which had turned into amorphous doughy blobs and all of Agnes' were a little funny looking, but they smelled good and in the end they'd wound up with decent amount of relatively normal looking ones.

Margo had grabbed the tea set and a blanket and Agnes had excitedly ran off to get her unicorn doll and they situated themselves around the blanket excitedly on the kitchen floor, since the living room was currently too near to the entrance of the lab.

Ady scooped a couple of the less strange looking cookies onto a plate. As she did she saw movement out of the corner of her eye and looked up to find Gru standing in the doorway, a look of absolute horror on his face as he took in the state of his kitchen. For a moment he could only just stand there while his face reddened slightly. Finally, he glared at Ady bitterly.

"Hi daddy, we made cookies and we're gonna have a tea party." Agnes said happily from the blanket. Gru's eyes swiveled over to her and his expression dissolved into tired frustration.

"Dat ees nice, Agnes." He said wearily, before he approached Ady.

"Are you tryeeng to test my patience?" He hissed at her. "Because I am thees close to loseeng eet!"

"Just a minute." Ady said as she handed Margo the plate of cookies who took them before casting a wary look at her father. Gru scowled as Ady took the oven mitts off and then crossed her arms.

"Okay, go ahead and tell me about this patience I've apparently been getting from you."

"Deed anyone ever advise you as to what time eet would be wise to be shutting your mouth!" He said in a low whisper as he leaned in sinisterly. Gru was built very well for this action, what with his hunched shoulders and hook nose. Ady leaned back instinctively, then she narrowed her eyes and forced herself to lean forward again so that her nose practically met his.

"No, did anyone ever tell you that smiley face boxers went out of style in the 80s?" Gru's glare had cleared, as he was stricken once more with the same bewilderment he'd felt on the night she had quit, when, contrary to all sense she'd approached him while he had a gun on her instead of freezing or running away.

"Just peeck thees up right now. Whatever you used ees coming out 'ove your pay." He said quietly as he leaned back again.

Agnes had approached him and tugged on his pant leg causing him to break his heated eye locked gaze with Ady.

"What?" He said, with perhaps too much harshness. His face softened when he saw her recoil a little. "I am sorry, Agnes, what ees eet you are wanting?"

"Will you play with us?"

"I am veery beesy right now." He said. "We can play lator." He added.

"Aw, but we never got to finish our last tea party." Agnes said miserably.

"At least try our cookies." Edith said while removing one of the blobs from the sheet. "Here's one of mine." Gru took it from her and eyed it curiously before turning his gaze back on Agnes.

"What ees that?" He asked Margo as she began setting the cups down.

"Our tea set." He sighed heavily and headed to one of the cabinets. After looking through it briefly he pulled out a kettle.

"As long as you are already messing up thee keetchen, you might as well do eet right."

"Be very careful with dese cups." He said as he handed them to Margo before he set the kettle on the stovetop with the tea bags in it and filled it with water.

After a while the kettle whistled and Gru took it off of the stove. He grabbed some milk and sugar before he turned off the stovetop and approached the girls.

"Be careful, dees ees very hot, raise your cups." He added. Ady, in the meantime had cleared up the kitchen with Margo's help and was standing off to the side and watching them with her arms crossed. Margo sat down as Gru poured the cups of tea.

"I think you should teach Ady how to clink dad." She said casually while raising her own cup with an innocent look on her face.

"I am sure you are perfectly capable 'ove handling dat." He said while shooting her a; 'why are you doing this to me?' look.

"Aw, but you teach it best!" Edith said.

"Yeah!" Agnes said. Gru sighed heavily.

"Fine, but then I need to go." He said. Margo motioned for Ady to sit down, which she did with hesitation. She had raised her eyebrows and was trying to work out what horrible thing a clink might be.

Gru sat down beside her and filled a cup, which he handed over before filling another for himself.

"All right." He said while trying not to look at her. "When you bump de cups together you 'ave to do de clinking noise." Ady raised her eyebrow.

"Huh?" She said.

"You make de clinking sound…wid your mouth." He said. "Here, raise your glass." He said. Ady raised the cup blankly. He touched cups with her.

"And clink."

"Clink." Ady said quietly.

"And den you drink?" He said.

"Clink my cup daddy!" Agnes said while outstretching her hand excitedly. Gru smiled at her and reached over. Ady took a sip and smiled a little in a slightly puzzled way. She met Margo's gaze and raised her eyebrows. Margo shrugged happily. Meanwhile, Gru had apparently forgotten about the Shrink Ray as well as Polina and the lab.

XXX

Edit: Fixed a couple of typos. Originally Polina came upstairs with Gru to get the Shrink ray but I edited it out. I guess i forgot to take out one of the sentences with her name in it though. If you ever see something that doesn't fit let me know. Sometimes when I've been writing for a really long time I make stupid mistakes.

Whoo, once again I severely underestimated the length of this chapter. Also, it's filler and originally did not exist. Originally I was going to skip right to the next, which was all planned out, and then I realized that I needed an extra one in there somewhere and decided to put it here. Hopefully it turned out all right. My brain feels like it's totally fried.

On a positive side, it shouldn't take too long from now on. The rest of the story is totally planned out and I got my new laptop. :) Whoo!

I think maybe the chapter title became slightly irrelevant as the story went on considering its only in the last part but I kind of liked it so…you know…why not.

Anyways, I forgot to respond to those of you who were not signed in for the last chapter so I'm going to do both here.

DespicableShe: While I am certain that there are TONS of grammar mistakes, I thank you anyways. :) It may be ooc, but I'm hesitant to believe that he would even be kind to other children so, I dunno. Oo Thanks for the review ^^

RoxasNaruLover: Thank you ^^ Hopefully now the updates will be quicker.

BITE ME: Wow the whole Internet? OO **Posts quickly to avoid mass internet destruction** Thanks for the review :)

HefnerJ- Why thank you very much, I am glad that you enjoyed it and I am glad you are enjoying the story.


	11. A Shark And A Barracuda

Author's Note: First of all, sorry for how long this took me. Last week was my birthday as well as Halloween so I was pretty busy all weekend and didn't get a chance to write much. Also, I'm sorry that this chapter is shorter then the last few, it really wasn't intentional, it just sort of worked out that way.

The second thing I wanted to mention is that I have a beta now, although not yet for this particular chapter. I sent it to her, but since I took so long with it, I figured, in this case it would be a good idea to just post it. So, the sentence structure of the chapter will change when she she gets back to me (And the bad grammar). I also wanted very much to thank her for offering to beta for me. I appreciate it very much.

Chapter 10:

A Shark And A Barracuda

"Can I have more sugar in my tea?" Edith asked while raising her teacup.

"You do not need any more sugar." Gru responded. "There ees already plenty een your cup."

"It's still bitter," she said with a frown.

"I put five scoops een, eet ees nothing but sugar. Clink." He added the last as he touched cups with Agnes, who had been trying to get his attention. She smiled and took a drink as if it had been impossible to do so without first clinking.

"Do we really have to clink between every single sip?" Ady asked as she brought _her_ cup up to Agnes who had scooted over a little so she could reach her. On her other side Edith was sulking as she swished the tea around.

"Mhmm." Margo responded.

"So this tea party is going to be an all day thing, huh?" She asked as Margo picked up the plate of cookies and offered it around the circle. She had to pull it away from Edith when the girl tried to grab a handful. Gru took one reluctantly.

Ady also accepted one of the cookies and absently took a bite out of it. She had been watching Gru. He looked slightly odd in that setting with his long legs folded, his dark clothing and hunched shoulders, holding the tiny toy teacup in one hand and the cookie in the other. It was like the apron. It didn't fit.

"Why are dey shaped like thees?" he asked as he held the strange little cookie up to his eye.

"That's one of Agnes'." Edith said.

"You don't like it?" Agnes asked wide-eyed.

"No, I am sure eet ees fine," he said quickly as he took a bite.

"What happened to the one I gave you?" Edith asked.

"I theenk eet accidentally got misplaced somewhere." Gru said while trying indiscriminately to clear his throat. He picked up his tea and took a drink.

"You forgot to clink dad." Margo said.

"Well, I will clink twice next time, why are dese so salty?" He added the last to Ady in a half whisper in case it was one of his daughters that added the salt.

"Oh, the salt got knocked over onto one batch," she said casually.

"Can I have some more tea?" Margo asked from across the blanket. Ady took up the teapot and poured her some, before moving to Agnes, who had extended her own tiny cup. Gru lurched backward in embarrassment as the woman leaned over him to reach his daughter, oblivious to his discomfort. At some point she'd removed her sweatshirt leaving only her tank top. Her shoulders were therefore exposed and he couldn't help but notice, were covered in freckles.

When she pulled back she gave him a questioning look and it took him a moment to register what it was she wanted. He raised his cup, while wearing a look of quiet bewilderment as she poured his tea.

"Do you want another cookie daddy?" Agnes asked as she handed him one. He looked toward her and opened his mouth to respond only for it to become a brief exclamation of pain as some of the scalding tea poured over his wrist. He turned back to Ady with a scowl.

"Would you watch eet! Eet ees just thee pouring of tea. Eet should not be dat deeficult!"

"You're moving the cup." She responded with frustration as she grabbed his hand and the bottom of the cup to steady it so that she could finish pouring his tea without burning him further. He withheld the suspicion that she had done it on purpose, mostly because he was eyeing her again with discomfort.

"You have very girly hands," she said, breaking him from his bewildered concentration. His mother had often commented on his hands…well commented wasn't the right word…mocked was probably more accurate; criticized, ridiculed, tormented and so on and so forth. He scowled and pulled his cup away from her.

Agnes had put her Unicorn toy in his lap. He gave her a 'you and your sisters really aren't helping' look, which she of course did not grasp and his expression dissolved into a tired smile as he took the cookie she was still proffering.

"Do you want one for my unicorn too?" she asked.

"Thee unicorn does not need a cookie." He said.

"But he's hungry." She insisted.

"He ees made 'ove stuffing, eet ees physically impossible for him to be hungry." She continued to stare at him until he finally took another cookie. "All right." He said with a sigh. He met Ady's slightly amused smile as she poured some more tea for herself.

There was a soft sound of someone clearing their throat from the kitchen door. Gru looked up at Dr. Nefario who was standing in the doorway with his hands behind his back.

"Gru, can I have a word." He said.

Gru frowned and after setting the small teacup down and carefully and grabbing the unicorn so that he could stand up, he approached the older man who was regarding him with his long wrinkled face. Gru noticed that he was still holding the tiny cookies and he offered one to Nefario, who upper lip quivered slightly.

"I do not want a cookie!" he hissed in frustration as he pushed his hand away. "Miss Molyneaux is waiting for you downstairs and getting more impatient and I come up here and find you…playing tea party." He added while gesturing at Ady and the girls. "This is not a problem I should be having Gru."

"Eet ees not a problem…I sat down for a moment…" Gru started.

"It's nearly been an hour!" Dr. Nefario interrupted him. "And this is a problem, it's becoming a huge problem. I'm really beginning to think you're not taking this seriously at all!"

"I am taking eet seriously," Gru said defensively. "Thees was simply an unplanned inceedent." He cleared his throat when Nefario's face had not become any more confident. "I will get thee shrink ray and retorn to thee lab." Nefario continued to glare at him for a moment before shaking his head and heading towards the elevator.

XXX

After Ady and the girls had cleaned up the stuff from the tea party Ady was persuaded to accompany the girls outside although it really didn't take much to convince her to leave Gru's house. She chucked a stone in the direction of the neighbors house to make certain that nothing tragic would happen, should the girls stray beyond the borders of the front yard. She accidentally hit Gru's next-door neighbor who she had not seen and who had been hunched over his garden.

He jumped up and looked around him frantically before he caught Ady's apologetic eye.

"Sorry." She said. "Was just…checking for electricity." It occurred to her that this sounded rather odd, but the man didn't seem to notice. He just nodded with some relief and went back to tending to his shrubbery. Compared to Gru's, his yard was quite nice; the shrubbery was cut neatly and behind him there was a sprinkler watering the lawn and the flowers, although compared to Gru's yard even a nuclear waste dump would probably appeal…at least there would likely be some green somewhere. Ady wondered vaguely if he salted the ground or something, it was hard to imagine it could get this bad on it's own.

"I guess we could play tag or something." Margo said with a shrug as Ady leaned against the house and picked absently at the grass with the tip of her shoe, watching as it crumbled slightly.

"It's hot." Agnes said as she leaned against Ady's leg.

Edith headed over to the fence and climbed it enough so that she was leaning on the top. Fred paused in his garden work and looked up slowly at the slightly bored blue eyes regarding him from under the pink hat.

"Aren't you the guy that dad's always complaining about?"

"Uhh…"

"Edith, leave the neighbor alone." Margo said as she attempted to pull Edith off of the fence.

"What? He is. Dad always runs into his mailbox on purpose when go somewhere in the tank." She said as she struggled out of Margo's grasp. Fred frowned slightly.

"So you are…you live here now? With Gru?" Fred asked the girls, ignoring the comment about the mailbox for now.

"Um, we're his kids." Margo said, while giving Edith a stern look.

"Oh, well that's nice. I didn't know he had kids." He said and Ady got the impression that he really meant it, which was slightly mystifying.

"What are you doing to that bush?" Edith asked.

"Well, I'm cutting it so that it'll look nice."

"Why?"

"Because when it looks nice my yard looks nice." He said, while casting a brief look at Ady who had been thinking; _what a sad little man. _Although to be fair this could have been mostly because of the sweater vest.

"Can we play with your sprinkler?" Edith asked.

"Well…I'm using it right now, you don't have your own sprinkler?" For a moment Edith just stared at him owlishly.

"I think no is a safe bet." Ady mumbled to herself. Gru had probably never even seen a sprinkler before.

"We're really hot." Agnes said from beside her. Fred's gaze drifted over to her and he was subject to her giant brown eyes. He smiled a little.

"My sprinkler is being used right now, but you know, I may have something else you can use to keep cool." He said before he set his shears down and headed towards his house. Ady instinctively grabbed a hold of Edith's arm when she reached for them.

"Don't even think about it." She said. Fred returned a moment later with a small plastic bag filled with deflated balloons.

"How are those going to keep us cool." Edith said while crossing her arms and giving him a dark look.

"You can use them for water balloons." He said. Agnes's eyes brightened a little.

"Yay, water balloons." She said. "What are water balloons?" She added while gazing at Margo who accepted the plastic balloons politely.

"Thanks." She said with a smile. "Come on, let's go fill them up in the sink." She said to her sisters.

"Can we put them in the freezer?" Edith asked. Ady frowned as she let go of the girl's arm.

"No."

"Can we throw them at passing cars?"

"No!"

"Can we throw them at our car?"

"N-yeah all right…knock yourself out." She said as she put her hands in her pockets. The girls headed inside excitedly, leaving Ady and Fred standing by the fence.

"You know, Gru never struck me as a family man." He said jovially. Ady turned back towards him and regarded him mildly.

"You amaze me." She said after a moment.

"I guess you can never tell a person's character by appearances though."

"Sometimes you can."

"So you are…"

"Babysitting." Ady said, in the desire to defer any misunderstandings before they occurred. "I'm Ady." She added.

"I'm Fred." He said as he offered his hand. Ady pulled one of her hands out of her pocket and shook it.

"Say do you think you could have a word with Gru about his electric fence. My dog got shocked the other day and ever since then me and my wife can't seem to get him to come down from one of the kitchen cabinets."

"Uhh, I don't know how much good it would do…"

"Oh…okay, well, nice meeting you." He said, a little downtrodden as he got back to work. Ady raised her eyebrows and broke away from the fence.

"Why hasn't he moved?" Ady asked Margo when the girls returned from the house with the filled balloons. Margo looked towards Fred's house and shrugged.

"Dad wonders the same thing."

They set the buckets down. Edith picked one of the balloons up and eyed it before raising it above her shoulder over Agnes who had selected a small blue balloon and was eyeing it happily. Ady grabbed Edith's wrist before she could break it over the girl's head.

"Keep it below the neck, kid."

"Fine…" Edith said sulkily, as Ady let her wrist go. She threw it at Agnes' feet, making the girl jump and drop her balloon, which popped.

"Aw…" Agnes said sadly.

While Margo started to divide the other balloons up, Ady went over to the front steps and watched. Edith wasted no time in throwing hers and it seemed apparent that she'd already forgotten about not launching them at people's faces because Ady had to remind her on at least three occasions, one directly after she herself got clocked in the face by one of the girl's errant balloons and once when one of them was launched over the fence at Fred. Margo also chastised her sister for this, but it didn't make much of a difference.

Agnes seemed hesitant to pop her balloons and on the occasions when she did throw them she seemed to have inadequate upper arm strength and they usually bounced lazily without popping at all. Occasionally when this happened Edith would quickly scoop them up and throw them back at the girl until finally she sulked over to the steps where Ady was sitting were her two remaining water balloons and sat down.

"I don't like water balloons." She said while looking at the two in her tiny hands as if she expected them to suddenly pop by themselves.

"Don't be a baby." Edith said. Agnes gave the older girl a fretful look.

"Leave her alone, Edith." Margo said. "If she doesn't want to play, she doesn't have to."

"I'm not a baby." Agnes said sulkily. Ady smiled.

"Nah, you're just short," she said as she hoisted Agnes onto her shoulders. "Come on, we'll get her." she added while taking one of the tiny balloons.

"Hey, that's not fair!" Edith said, backing up as Ady approached her. Agnes two handed the other one and threw it at Edith. It bounced off of her sweater and popped at her feet.

"Still a sissy throw." Edith mumbled as she wiped at her hose. She hoisted the other balloon, ready to throw it at Ady, but her attention was diverted when the front door opened.

"Hey dad…" She started. Ady turned, acknowledging Gru's presence in the doorway as well as the presence of the frightening woman she'd seen earlier. Gru had just enough time to register the water balloon and for the word 'no' to form on his lips. The throw itself was not aimed well and therefore did not hit Gru. It hit Polina instead.

XXX

The girl's were ushered inside; dripping wet, after removing their shoes at the door and into a bathroom where they shivered in towels which, Ady noticed had Gs on them. She located a hair dryer, which did surprise her a bit and attempted to dry the girls' hair. She had some trouble with Edith because she refused to remove her hat, and finally, with a sigh she conceded to run the hairdryer over Edith's head, hat and all.

"Are we in trouble?" Agnes asked. Margo was brushing the younger girl's hair carefully, while they sat on the bathroom floor, Margo with her leg's folded and Agnes with her knees pulled up to her chest.

"I don't know." Ady said, while lifting part of Edith's hat to get to the damp blond hair underneath. "You're getting on my nerves kid," she added to the girl when she kept pulling the hat strings back down over her ears. Edith stuck her tongue out a little.

"She seemed really mad." Margo said quietly.

She had been. In fact she had started speaking very loudly in French. Gru, at first just wore a look of horrified and dismayed bewilderment and then, when the woman had taken a deliberate step forward, he'd moved very smoothly between her and the girls and muttered something back at her, also in French, before politely ushering her back inside. He paused only to cast a half exasperated look at Ady.

"Yeahhh." Ady said carefully. "I wouldn't worry too much about it. My guess is that your dad will blame me." She quickly swiped Edith's hat off and stuffed it in her back pocket before turning the hairdryer on full blast as the girl struggled to get it back.

"How is he going to blame you?" Margo asked.

"I dunno. Maybe he'll blame me for not jumping in front of her."

"That would not 'ave been a bad idea." Gru said, as he sauntered up quietly. "Go geet dressed gurls, I weel start on deener soon."

Ady, who was watching Gru's expression in the mirror, turned off the hair dryer as Edith jumped down from the stool she had been standing on. She pulled the pink hat out of her pocket to hand to the girl, who promptly stuffed it back on her head on her way out the door. Margo and Agnes also stood and left the bathroom. Margo looked at her father doubtingly as she passed him, but he purposefully avoided her gaze in the desire to maintain his resolve.

For a moment Ady and Gru watched each other carefully, as if they were both awaiting the first blow so that it might be effectively countered. Finally Ady raised the hairdryer a little, aware that she could have very well been tempting death.

"So did you have this thing before you adopted the girls or is it new? What did you use it for?"

Gru bared his teeth slightly and stepped into the room, while pulling a gun out of his coat.

"Do you 'ave any idea how badly theengs could 'ave gone eef I had not been dere?"

"It was a water balloon." Ady said.

"Dat…ees beside thee point. You…are only lucky dat no harm was done."

"If you're talking about that coat…it was water…I'm pretty sure animal's are water proof, Gru." Ady said wearily as turned away from him and set hair dryer down. He surprised her by taking another step towards her and grabbing her shoulder to twist her back around to face him. Ady looked up slightly wide eyed into the piercing blue eyed gaze and for a moment felt genuinely frightened.

"It may please you to make your leetle jokes, but I am very serious." He said. He cast a brief look at the gun in his hand before setting it on the counter. "Thees ees your job. You will keep my daughter's away from dis woman, you will keep away from dis woman and you will keep away from me when I am weeth thees woman. Eef you think dat your life does not depend on thees, you are sadly sadly mistaken."

When Ady regained her composure her eyes narrowed a little.

"The people you decide to invite into your house are not my responsibility," she said coldly.

"But dorring thee day, when you are watching them, my gurls are and…"

"Well that may be," she interrupted him. "But don't think for a second that that means that you suddenly aren't."

"I deed not say dat!" He hissed back at her.

"Fine! Good!" She said as she crossed her arms. "Then tell me, what exactly did I do wrong here? Did you really expect me to jump in front of that balloon? You were standing right beside her, why didn't you?" Gru opened his mouth to reply and then his anger dissolved to weariness.

"Why…why are you so…deeficult?" He said with frustration, while massaging the bridge of his nose.

"Well, maybe I just like to tick you off!" She hissed back at him before moving around him and heading out into the hallway.

"Well eet's working!"

"Good!"

Gru growled and without looking grabbed at his gun before following her out. He was not going to lose again.

"You…I am not feenished weeth you!"

"Well I am _feenished weeth you_."

"Why does everyone…I don't…I don't sound like dat!" He said before taking a step forward. "I am warning you…do not keep walking down de hall!" Ady sighed and turned. She eyed his weapon and looked up at him with her eyebrow raised.

"You're not going to shoot me with that, Gru."

"Maybe not, but I have plenty of weapons dat are highly unpleasant weethout being fatal and de gurls would never 'ave to know about dem. Do not theenk dat I would be hesitating to use any of dem!"

"That's…not what I meant."

"Yeah, what other reason would I be 'aving for not shooting you!" He watched angrily as she approached him and then raised his eyebrow when she touched his shoulder.

"Because that's a hairdryer, Gru." She said before turning around and heading back down the hall. He eyed the hairdryer for a moment with weariness before sighing heavily and setting it back onto the counter.

XXX

When Gru returned to the lower level of his house Polina, Nefario and Doug were waiting for him by the front door. He tucked his weapon back into his coat.

"Get ze car started Doug." Polina said. Doug lumbered out the door at her request. Polina turned to Gru and fixed him with a strange smile.

"How do you think today went, Gru? Out of humble curiosity." Gru gave her a slightly nervous smile.

"Tolerably?"

"I would not 'ave aspired so high. Walk me to my car," she said as she took his arm. "Can I give you some valuable advice?" She said as they headed down the front steps towards the limo.

"Okay…" Gru said as he cast a brief look towards Nefario who was looking slightly concerned.

"If you want to aspire to greatness, et ez important to refrain from surrounding yourself with mediocrity."

"Mediocrity?"

"Yes." She said, and apparently that was all she had to say on that matter. "Over ze next couple ove days we will be moving into ze next phase of ze plan."

"Thee next…couple of days?" Gru asked, suddenly feeling a little ill.

"Yes, iz zere a problem?"

"Well…I was…I mean I am going to 'ave to…take thorsday off…" He said nervously.

"What reason iz zere, for you to take Thursday off?" She asked and in her dark eyes he saw a bottomless pit.

"Well…I…thee babysitter cannot work…on Thorsday." Polina approached him, still smiling and began to speak to him in a very soft voice.

"I believe you are a competent man and a good villain," she said as she took his scarf and began to slowly wind it around her gloved hand. "I don't think I 'ave made the wrong choice wiz you and we could compliment each other very well." Gru swallowed as she got up to his neck and pulled him slightly forward. "However, at ze moment you are appearing to be a man of great incompetence. I should remedy this if I were you."

"So…ees dat a no to taking thorsday off den?"

"What do you think?" She asked sweetly.

"I will…deal weeth eet."

"Good." She said as she let go of his scarf and headed towards the car. "I will see you tomorrow. I am looking forward to it."

Dr. Nefario approached him as he straightened his scarf and watched her go.

"Well…" he said as he crossed his arms behind his back. "That could have gone better." Gru gave him a dark look before turning back towards the house. He had a nasty feeling that he was going to soon be stuck between the wills of two women and like many men before him was beginning to realize that this was akin to being stuck between a shark and a barracuda.

XXX

To those of you without an account:

lolers: I shall, thanks for the review :)

despicableShe: I'm glad you are enjoying it ^^ And thank you very much, it has already started started getting better. Sorry to hear that you have experienced the same.

Rii: I have every intention of continuing. You may sleep. oo


	12. Felonius

Chapter 11:

Felonius

Gru found Ady in the living room sitting on the floor at the foot of the crocodile couch. Margo had just finished brushing Agnes' hair and had put it back up in her regular ponytail before moving to her own.

When it became apparent that she was having some difficulty with tangles, Ady motioned for her to hand her the brush and Margo did so with some hesitation. For a moment Gru stood in the doorway watching as the woman brushed his daughter's hair as he thought about how he was going to get her to work on Thursday. In the mean time Dr. Nefario approached from behind and cleared his throat.

"Well?"

"I will…I am…seemply planning my strategy."

"Strategy? She's only a babysitter." The older man frowned. "There's no reason to be afraid of her?"

"What? No! Why would I be…dat ees reediculous!" Gru said while crossing his arms and giving Nefario a sideways look. Dr. Nefario patted him on the shoulder.

"It's all right lad. You just don't have the experience."

"What are you talking about?"

"I was a bit of a ladies man back in the day. I know all about how to talk to women." Gru looked at him doubtfully. "Let me handle this."

"I…do not theenk dat ees a good idea," but it was too late as he had already approached her.

"Hi uncle Nefario." Agnes said while scrambling to her feet and bouncing up to the elderly man who winced slightly.

"Hello Agnes. Oh no please…don't hug my leg." He said as he shook the little girl off. "There you go."

"See this picture I drew. It's a kitty."

"Oh…how nice…" He said before clearing his throat and facing Ady, who was watching him as if she weren't entirely certain what to make of him. Meanwhile Agnes slipped the drawing into Nefarios coat pocket.

"I have a matter I need to discuss with you young lady."

"Uhh…okay." She said.

"We, that is me and Gru have a lot of work to do over the next couple of days so whatever your plans are for Thursday…if your I dunno going to the clip joint to get flimflammed or whatever the kids are doing these days, you'll just have to cancel it." Ady stared at him for a moment before her green eyes drifted over to Gru who was looking slightly depressed.

"Going where to do what now?"

"…I don't know." Gru said with a sigh.

"Is this why he's not allowed outside of the basement?"

"Basement?" Nefario said as Gru put a hand on his shoulder.

"You are not helping." He said.

"I am a highly experienced scientist. I've been inventing machines beyond your comprehension since before you were born." He said with some irritation.

"I weel handle thees, go, go do sometheeng down eed thee lab."

Gru turned back to the woman as the doctor headed out, mumbling something about fetching the anti gravity serum.

"See if she's still joking while she's drifting continuously into space." He said bitterly as he disappeared down the hall.

"I'm not babysitting on Thursday." Ady said as she gathered up her things and headed towards the front door. Gru followed her miserably.

"Eet ees veery important dat I work on thorsday. Just take Friday…or Saturday off." He said, trying to keep the frustration out of his voice.

"How do I know I won't be having this same conversation with you on Friday or Saturday." She said as she slipped on her sweatshirt and zipped it up.

"Could you…just…thees one time…not be insufferable?" He said.

"Nope. I already made plans for Thursday." Ady said. "Besides, I will be taking Friday or Saturday off. I get two days off, remember? The middle aged soccer moms are all yours." She said as she stepped outside and headed down the walk.

Gru flipped open the panel by the front door, his fingers hovering over the keys as he considered turning the electric fence on. After a moment he shut it with a scowl.

XXX

Gru woke up the next day with a headache and a ringing in his ears. He stared at the ceiling for a moment before it occurred to him that the ringing was not something left over from his dreams and that it was in fact his phone. He finally sat up with a sigh and swung his legs over the side of the bed, an action that was accompanied by a symphony of cracks and pops. He picked the phone up and eyed the number, fully expecting to see the picture of Nefario in his swim trunks. When he realized it wasn't, he frowned and flipped the phone open.

"Heelo?"

"Good, morning, Gru." Polina's voice sounded even more oily over the phone. "I hope I did not wake you." Gru pulled the phone away from his ear for a moment to get a look at the time. His phone read that it was 6:00am.

"Don't be seely…I am always awake thees early…" He said dryly. "What ees eet that you are wanting?" He added as he rubbed at his eyes. Since he had started working with Polina the already prominent circles beneath them had deepened.

"I was calling because ze work we will be doing today will require a few of ze items I included in ze plans I gave you two weeks ago. After yesterday I feel I must make certain zat zey are ready."

"Er…which items would dese be?" He asked uncomfortably.

"Ze espionage detonators."

"I am…sure dat dey are…"

"You sound a bit uncertain."

"No…I am cortain…could you hold for one moment." Gru frowned as he put her on hold and dialed another number. He balanced the receiver on his shoulder as he went about the task of getting dressed.

"Fzgwt…wha?" Dr. Nefario's slightly groggy voice answered.

"Dr. Nefario, tell me we 'ave feenished thee spy bombs."

"Who is this?"

"Wha…Eet ees Gru! How…who else would eet be?"

"Gru? Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"I know eet ees early, but Miss Molyneaux ees on de other line askeeng about dese." There was silence from the other end for a moment. "Heelo?"

"Oh…I…well they're not quite done."

"What ees not quite mean?"

"I…well I haven't started them." Gru pinched at the bridge of his nose. "I'll get right on it…I can have something done in an hour or so."

"Sometheeng dat works?" Gru asked, his voice muffled slightly because he was resting his head in his hand.

"Er…more or less."

XXX

Four hours later Polina was looking at the result as Gru sat on the couch in her living room with a storm raging in his expression.

"I 'ave a question." Polina said airily as she inhaled on her cigarette. Gru slumped his shoulders slightly. "Why are zey shaped like cookies?"

"Dey are…made out of left overs…from another plan." He said gloomily, while eyeing the cookie robots.

"Cookies?"

"Eet ees…a very long story. Dr. Nefario said he modified dem so dat dere are veery tiny camera's eenside…er, dey also explode." He was examining one with a frown. As he said it he was aware that exploding cookie robots were a fairly stupid idea, although in retrospect if they had made these modifications at the start he would have had much less trouble with Vector.

"I do not see ze significance of zis shape." She said while waving the elegant cigarette and leaving a fine stream of smoke.

"Eet ees camouflage. You 'ave got to admeet dat no one would suspect dem."

"What if someone tries to eat one?"

"Well den…dat will be very unlucky…for dat person…and probably very messy." Gru said as he set the robot down carefully among the others.

XXX

Ady was lying on her stomach on the floor in Gru's living room coloring in a picture of some cutesy animals in a half used coloring book. She was resting her chin in her palm and was absently working at a piece of gum. Agnes was snuggled up next to her coloring the other page and occasionally telling her what crayons to use where. Margo and Edith were drawing.

"Look I drew I guy blowing up." Edith said as she displayed her picture. Ady looked up through a few stray red hairs.

"Wow…that's…that's great Edith." She said.

"You can have it if you want." Edith said with perhaps a hint of uncharacteristic shyness.

"Oh…thanks." Ady said as she took the proffered drawing. She looked down as Agnes moved at her side.

"I'm gonna draw you a picture too." The little girl said excitedly as she grabbed at a piece of paper. Ady raised her eyebrow.

"Does that mean we're done coloring?" She asked hopefully.

"No we'll color more after I'm done. Don't look." She added while shielding her paper with her tiny arm.

She looked up at Margo who was deeply concentrated on what she was doing and was about to ask her what it was she was drawing when the doorbell rang. Margo looked up at her and raised her eyebrows.

"Do people usually come to your door?"

"Uh…sometimes Mr. Mcdade does…" Ady put down the crayon she was holding and hoisted herself up.

When she got to the door she reached for the knob and then thought better of it and looked through the peephole instead.

"Who is it?" Margo asked from behind her.

"Uhh…an old woman with really big hair and red glasses." The woman looked up at the peephole as she said it. Ady instinctively moved back a little.

"Open the door, you cannot fool me I can hear you breathing."

"Sounds like grandma." Margo said.

"Grandma?" Ady asked, allowing just a hint of horror to surround the word. She opened her mouth to say something else, but without warning the woman kicked the door hard and it became an expression of pain as she stumbled away from it. From the other side the woman laughed.

"Ha! Got you! Open up or the next one will throw it off of its hinges!" Ady straightened with a snarl.

"You probably better open it." Margo said. Edith and Agnes had also wondered into the room.

Ady unlocked the door and opened it hesitantly. The woman looked up at her.

"Oh, your not him. Who are you and where is my son?"

XXX

Gru and Polina spent much of the day flying to various places using Polina's jet. For the most part they went to various government building such as the Reichstag building in Germany, the Secretariat Building in India and the Palais Bourbon in France, but they also made odd stops in random places which Gru failed to see the significance in. For instance, he did not understand what a building like the Reichstag had in common with a BMW plant except that it was in the same country…but that could be said of a lot of things.

Polina met up with people at each stop, presumably more employees and handed over the cookie robots silently. For the most part they didn't ask questions, although there was some confusion with the man at the BMW plant, who attempted to take a bite of the cookie and was started by both Gru and Polina's exclamations of discouragement.

When she seemed satisfied they returned to her house and Gru opened up a device that looked a bit like a custom built laptop made out fo spare parts and waited glumly as the Cookie Bot OS version 2.3 loaded. Nefario had altered the original slightly. The first program had been 1.7…which had raised questions as it were, but as he waiter for the bar to inch across the screen he wondered where 1.8 and on went…and why they had been designed to begin with.

"You will be able to control zem wiz zis?" Polina asked as she sat down and offered him a glass of wine. Gru eyed it briefly before finally taking it and setting it down on the table.

"Ideally." He said. In truth he wasn't entirely sure it would work. It had worked at Vectors but on that occasion the cookie bots had been a yard or so away from the program. He wasn't sure if he could activate all of them at this distance and was resisting the urge to cross his fingers.

"Fascinating." She said while smiling. "Let us see if zey work." She said as she took a sip of wine and smiled at him sweetly.

The loading screen reached 100% and Gru held his breath. After a moment the screen flashed to live, showing a dozen small screens. He breathed out.

"Dere…no problemo." He said, trying to hide his relief.

"Very good, I am impressed." Polina said in the tones of someone praising a pet that has just performed a rather difficult trick.

Gru pressed a few keys, perhaps wishing to make up for his poor performance the day before and smiled a little as one of the bots rose and began crawling up the wall of an office in the secretariat. Polina leaned forward.

"You can move zem anywhere?"

"Dey can cut through walls too." He said as he made the bot stationary again. "Eet should be…" He stopped because Polina had rested her long slender hand on his thigh and had leaned towards him.

"Your methods are unorthodox but effective. Now…" She said, close enough so that Gru could smell the wine on her breath. "Let's see how effective ze explosion is."

XXX

The woman was nearly half her height, although her hair did give her a couple extra feet.

"She's our babysitter, grandma." Margo said, as she approached them.

"Babysitter?" The older woman seemed to size Ady up. "He should have just asked me. Where is the good for nothing, anyways?"

"He's working." Margo said.

"Hi grandma!" Agnes said happily while bounding up and hugging her. The old woman's incredibly prickly features softened a little. This seemed to be the response Agnes brought out of nearly everyone.

"Hello sweetheart." She said before turning back to the older girl. "Don't tell me he hasn't given up that ridiculous villain thing yet." Margo shrugged a little. The woman rolled her eyes.

"Do you want to color with us grandma?" Agnes asked

"Uhh…" Ady started.

"Grandma doesn't color, but I'll watch you for a while." The old woman had a fairly thick French accent and for a moment Ady wondered how this could be when her son apparently spoke such heavy Russian. By now she knew enough to not dwell too much on anything that confused her in regards to Gru and therefore let this go.

"Kay, after I finish my picture for Ady I could draw one for you too." Agnes said happily as she took the woman's hand and led her into the living room.

"So you're babysitting huh?" Gru's mom said as Ady followed them with a frown.

"Uh huh…and…you're…_his _mom?" She asked blankly.

"Regrettably." The old woman said as she sat on the couch. "You're a little old to be a babysitter aren't you?" Ady frowned.

"I didn't know there was a specific age." She said with some annoyance.

"You're a bit scrawny too, you don't look like you'd last a week with kids." She said as she watched Agnes draw. Ady opened her mouth to reply, her eyes flashing a little, but Margo spoke before she got the chance too.

"We like her grandma." The older girl said.

"She cut holes in my hose and she punched a guy." Edith added approvingly.

"Huh, well can you make coffee, babysitter? I've been in karate all afternoon and could use a boost."

"It's Ady..." She said cooly. "And…not to be rude or anything, but…I wouldn't get _your son_ a cup of coffee and he pays me." The woman's sharp eyes met hers and after a moment, sparkled a little.

"Well Ady, I'm Marlena." She said as she offered her hand. Ady took it hesitantly and tried not to grimace at the vice like handshake the old woman had. "Has Felonius managed to convince you he's intimidating?"

"Felonius?" Ady asked while pulling her hand free and ringing it out.

"Oh that's right, he goes by his surname. Awful isn't it? He used to get beat up for it in grade school. Well, that was one of the reasons." She said as she took off the ridiculous glasses and wiped them.

"Ooh show her the pictures where dad looks like a girl." Edith said as she leaned in towards Marlena.

"She doesn't want to see that album." She said, while smirking a little.

"Actually I kind of do." Ady said, distinctly evil thoughts flitting into her mind.

"He keeps it in the safe upstairs in the safe. The combination is 92860, one of you go fetch it." Edith slid off of the couch and headed towards the hall. "He used his birthday." Marlena said to Ady. "He hasn't figured out that I know it yet. How about that cup of coffee?"

XXX

Gru had detonated one of the cookie bots at Polina's request. Or rather, she had detonated it after he told her how. It had worked fine. She'd set off one of the ones she'd put in a more random location so it would not be as observed with as much vigilance as setting off a bomb in a government building would.

Gru pulled into the driveway of his menacing suburban obstruction at about 7:30. He had been lost in thought when he did and therefore did not see his mother's car until he stepped out of the tank. When he did he froze and for a moment just stared at it as if the jaws of hell had opened and were threatening to swallow him whole.

"You 'ave got to be keeding me." He said breathlessly. For a moment he seriously considered heading back toward the tank and driving away. Instead he approached his front door with a severe expression on his face.

He stood at the door for a moment staring at the knob before sighing heavily and heading inside. He heard laughter from the kitchen and with a sinking feeling headed in that direction.

It was worse then he thought…well, actually knowing his mother it was exactly as bad as he imagined, but this knowledge didn't make things better.

The first thing that hit him when he stepped into the doorway was the smell of meatloaf and he knew that his mother had cooked it, mainly because she'd made the same meatloaf a million times when he had been younger and she knew he hated it. The next of course was the fact that she and the babysitter were sitting at the counter looking at the album. They were on the picture of him in his dress clothes with the awful curls and the younger girl's eyes were dancing with laughter.

After a moment they noticed him. Ady tried to stifle her laughter in the face of his obvious _lack_ of amusement. His mother didn't even try to hide her amusement.

"Mom, what are you doing here?" He asked through slightly gritted teeth.

"I wanted to stop by to see my grandchildren."

"Well, eet would appear as eef you 'ave done dat…so I guess you weel be on your way den." He said, almost pleadingly.

"After I finish this cup of coffee. You think that is bad, you should see his pictures from Highschool. Hold on, I think I've got one here." She said as she shrugged off her purse. Ady looked sideways at Gru who glared at her.

"Mom, please…dat ees not." He started miserably.

"Don't get your britches in a twist. Ah, here it is." She said as she handed the girl the picture. Gru rested his forehead in his hand. He felt a tug on his pant leg and looked down at Agnes who smiled at him.

"Hi daddy, do you want to see the pictures I drew for Ady and Grandma?"

"Maybe lator Agnes, why don't you and your seestors geet ready for bed." He said wearily while moving away from his mother and Ady.

"Will you read to us?" He nodded as Margo took the younger girl's hand and gave her dad a reassuring smile before her and Agnes and Edith headed out of the kitchen. Gru straightened and turned back towards the two women.

"I wanted a girl you know." Marlena was saying to Ady. "Too bad I got one." She added. Gru frowned and picked up his mothers coffee.

"Thee gurls are going to bed so dere ees really no reason for you to be staying. I will put thees een a travellors cup and you can take eet to go."

"Eh, don't bother." She said as she stood. "This coffee you buy is like water anyways, I don't know why you get it. A good cup of Cuban brew with a few drops of whiskey in it. That would put a few hairs on your chest, but my son drinks hot water and wine."

"All right, mom, good to see you, I weell call you. Sorry you 'ave to go" He said hurriedly as he ushered her out the door while casting a brief look of warning at Ady in case she should start laughing again.

In fact, Ady's laughter had, for the most part subsided when the woman had given her Gru's highschool photo. The photos in the album had been funny and she'd taken great pleasure at looking at each and every one of them at Gru's expense. The highschool photo, showing Gru still in the awful curls and scowling she found less funny for two reasons. The first reason was that she could sort of relate.

She'd never been the sort of person who took good photos in school, in part because until she was sixteen her mother had insisted that she keep her hair long. After a certain length, Ady's hair did what could only generously be called curling and when brushed at that length it tended to frizz like she'd stuck her finger in a light socket. Her mother insisted on brushing it at length before picture day and she imagined that somewhere there were a lot of school photos of her looking like a frizz ball and smiling in a way that looked as if she were about to kill someone.

The second reason she didn't find it funny was that his mother had wrapped the picture in gum…and that was just a little bit cold.

When Gru returned to the kitchen she was putting away the coffee cups and the plates.

"Uh, your mom made meatloaf." Ady said, while being subject to a look of pure hatred. "She said it was your favorite." She added with a uni shrug.

"Dat, I imagine, was hor idea 'ove a joke." He said. "You're deesmissed." he added as he left the room.

Ady frowned. She finished putting the stuff away and grabbed her bag. As she started out of the kitchen her eyes fell on the album. She shut it and sighed heavily before setting her bag down again and heading towards Gru's spiral staircase. She was really beginning to feel like she was pushing her luck.

She heard voices as she headed down the hallway to the girls' room. She intended to find Gru and make up some lie about how her plans had changed for the next day, they had only been with Dillon anyways and knowing him he had probably already forgotten.

She halted at the door, which was open a crack and debated on whether or not she should knock anyways.

XXX

"Do you hate grandma dad?" Edith said while leaning on her bed as Agnes struggled into her pajamas.

"I do not hate grandma." Gru said, perhaps pausing a little too long before he did. "But een thee future please do not show dat album to anyone else. Especially thee babyseetor." He helped Agnes with her pjs and then lifted her up into her bed.

"How come?" Edith said as she rested her chin on her arms.

"Because, I asked to not to." He added. "Which story weel eet be?"

"One Big Unicorn!" Agnes said happily.

"You are not yet tired 'ove dat?" He asked with the hint of a smile.

"Nope." Margo said as she snuggled into her own blankets.

"All right den." He said as he pulled the book from the bookcase.

"Do the horn!" Edith said.

"Yes, all right I weel do thee horn, Edith do not hang over thee side of thee bed like dat." He said as he held the book up to his face. The girls laughed. They laughed no matter how many times he did it. Gru smiled and started into the story, feeling good for the first time all day.

"One beeg unicorn strong and free…"

XXX

When he started into the book, with Ady still standing in the hall, she already knew that if there had been a moment that was appropriate to interrupt, she had missed it and by the end, it was clear to her that if he found her there, he _probably_ would shoot her. She made an attempt to head quietly back towards the staircase. It didn't work. She made it about halfway.

Gru's face reddened, perhaps slightly out of embarrassment but more likely out of anger. He lessened the space between him and her and grabbed at her wrist, pulling her back towards the stairs and away from the girl's room.

"Hey!" Ady said while trying to keep up with him. When they got to the stairway Gru turned towards her.

"Dat ees eet. I am done playeeng thees game weeth you." He hissed at her. "I may not be able to shoot you or fire you, but eef I were to hand you over to Dr. Nefario I would happily turn a blind eye to anything he might take eet een his head to do. And you will babyseet tomorrow,because I know where you live and I am not above blowing your house up." He added as he threw her hand down and headed into his room. He went to stuff his hand in his pockets and grimaced before absently pulling out one of the extra cookie robots and angrily throwing it to one side to rest near the dresser.

Meanwhile, what sympathy Ady had felt for him a second before was draining away and being replaced with fed up annoyance. She made a decision and followed him into his bedroom. He turned and opened his mouth, his expression livid but before he was able to argue, she grabbed at his scarf and brought his face level to hers.

"If you seriously still think that this is going to work on me, you're wrong. How many times are you going to make these stupid threats before that gets through to you? I'm done playing too." She added, close enough to him so that he could practically count the freckles on her blazing cheeks. "I was going to _offer_ to babysit tomorrow. That's why I came up here, but now I think I'll just take the next two days off."

For a moment he kept his eyes locked on hers, then he saw something out of the corner of his eye that got his attention and his expression froze. Ady followed his gaze to the corner of the room where the cookie bot was lying in a heap with his silk pjs. One of the chocolate chips was flashing red.

"Is that flashing cookie?" Ady asked, her anger subsiding a little as she loosened her grip on his scarf. She turned back towards him, taken aback as he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her after him as he half jumped, half rolled over the large king sized bed.

Gru landed painfully on the other side. The wind was knocked out of him as he hit the floor and he heard his back crack. It didn't help that Ady landed on top of him and accidentally kneed him in the groin. He grunted.

As the pain lessened Gru was aware that the girl was trying to pull away. He yanked her back down.

"Geet down." He hissed through his teeth. Just as he finished saying it the cookie exploded. For a moment there was a bright flash of light and a raucous sound. The explosion was strong enough so that Gru's bed was knocked onto it's side as a result of the tremor, shaking the room a second time as it came crashing down.

For a moment after the explosion there was a very loud silence. Ady broke it.

"Did that cookie just explode?" she asked, her voice slightly muffled by Gru's coat. She felt like it was kind of a stupid question, but it was all she could think to say and it was better then screaming.

XXX

Wow, this chapter took even longer then the last one. There are a couple of probably good reasons for this. One is that there was easily three pages of writing I wound up deleting because it didn't work. One is intense writer block mainly fueled by the fact I had no idea how to write for Marlena and the last is because I've gotten to that point in the semester when I'm ridiculously busy with schoolwork. Two more weeks after this one and I'll have a nice glorious month off for Christmas *_*

To those of you without an account

Rii: Don't die OO I'm glad your enjoying the story ^^

Despicable She: Hi ^^ I'm very glad that you are enjoying it, thanks for reading!

IamYourPhobia: (I know you have an account, but I believe I forgot to reply) Thank you for the review. Hopefully from now on the hints will be less subtle. : 3

Anyways, I hope this came out all right. Have a great Thanksgiving everyone!


	13. The Whirl Maker

Chapter 12:

The Whirl Maker

Before Gru could respond something fell off of the wall and shattered on the other side of the bed. It was probably a stroke of luck that the bed had fallen over when it did. It served to shield them from most of the blast. His gaze traveled up along the baseboard and it occurred to him that the spikes embedded into it were a quarter of an inch away from their heads. He paled a little.

Gru realized that Ady was trying to sit up. He loosened his grip. As she straightened, her hair brushed against his cheek. Gru colored and swallowed, his throat clicking as he did. When she got up on her elbows she met his gaze. He raised his eyebrows. There was a moment that radiated of awkwardness before Ady very carefully untangled her legs from his and moved to his side. Gru also sat up, his back cracking slightly.

They heard voices from the other side of the bed.

"Dad…we heard a loud…woah." That was Margo.

"Cool." And that was Edith. Gru stood up and moved around the bed to see what the damage was. There was a large hole in the wall. The girls were standing in the hallway looking at it.

"There's a hole in your wall." Edith said while pointing at the aforementioned hole.

"Yes Edith, I can see dat." Gru said as he picked up a remnant of the cookie bot and examined it.

"What happened?" Margo asked. Ady had moved around the bed as well and headed towards the door.

"Eet was nothing." Gru said as he tossed the piece aside. "Just a…minor malfunction."

"It was a cookie," Ady said. "It blew up." A little dust fell in front of her eyes. She frowned and ran her fingers through her hair letting the debris that had collected in it fall to the floor.

"Gru." Dr. Nefario shuffled slowly up the stairs. "Some signals went off in the lab saying that there may have been some commotion up here. Is everything all right?" Everyone turned towards him and Gru scowled a little. "I'll take that as a no then?"

"We need to talk about thee stability 'ove thee…espionage detonators." Gru said while brushing off his sleeves and casting a look at Ady who was picking tiny pieces of wall out of her hair.

"Is that the fancy word for exploding pastries?" She said without turning towards him.

"Why, what's the matter with them?" Dr. Nefario asked.

"Plez tell me you are keeding weeth me." Gru said with some bitterness.

"Oh yes…right the hole…well they should be stable so long as you don't activate them…you uh…didn't?"

"Why would I activate eet?"

"Well you could have by mistake."

"I deedn't." Gru said with a sigh. "I don't even 'ave thee controls…I left dem…" He paused uneasily for a moment, and then seemed to regain his composure before turning towards the girls. "Um, why don't you gurls geet back to bed."

"Aww…I wanna hear more about the explosion." Edith said. Margo looked at Edith and then turned back to her father with some doubt.

"Is everything…all right?"

"Everything ees fine. I just need to deescuss sometheeng weeth Dr. Nefario een private and besides eet ees past your bedtime." Gru said.

"But…part of the house blew up."

"Dat ees no excuse." He said while giving Ady a sideways look. She had ceased in her efforts to remove the plaster from her hair and was watching him.

"You expect us to sleep after that?" Margo continued.

"Yes." He said while turning back to his daughter. "Eet was an accident. Nothing to be concerned weeth." Margo hesitated before pulling at Edith's arm.

"Okay…I guess. Come on guys." She said. "Goodnight."

Agnes had moved over to Ady who had pulled what appeared to be one of Gru's socks out of her neckline and was examining it with a frown. The younger girl tugged on her pant leg.

"I never gave you your pitcher." She said.

"Um…okay." She said as the girl grabbed at her hand and pulled her after them.

Gru turned back to Dr. Nefario after they disappeared into the girls' room.

"I left thee controls weeth Polina so she could keep an eye on thee bots." He said in a low voice. Dr. Nefario considered this.

"You're not thinking…Oh that's ridiculous."

"Well eet ees either dat or your bomb malfunctioned. Either way we 'ave a problem!"

"Perhaps we could test it?"

"Deed you keep a spare?"

"No…no I gave you all of them. Maybe we could analyze the one that blew up?"

"Analyze what? Dere ees notheeng left!" Gru hissed.

"Well, I think I could probably pull up the program on one of the computers in the lab…of course I would have to update it to the new version…but I should be able to hack into all of the bots you gave to Polina and see if any of them were ignited. Of course it may take a while. You may have to see her again before we find out for sure. Why don't you meet me down in the lab…If it _is_ malfunctioning we should fix the problem now. It would be a shame if a small knick like that would set them off…Certainly would get in the way of…Gru?" He stopped when it occurred to him that Gru's focus had been diverted from him as Ady resurfaced from the girl's room and started down the stairs.

"Go geet started weeth dat. I will be down een a moment." He said as he circled around Dr. Nefario and headed towards the stairway.

He hurried down the steps, jumping the last few and overtook Ady about halfway down the hall.

"Hey, we need to deescuss tomorow." He said as he took her arm. She gave him a slightly exasperated look.

"We already did." She said as she shrugged off his hand. "If that was a demonstration on how you plan on blowing my house up, there may be a few flaws in the execution."

She said as she took a few steps towards the door. She stopped with a sigh and after running her palm over her forehead, she turned towards the man with a frown.

"Fine. I will babysit tomorrow, but…" She added as she grabbed at his scarf before he could pull away. "I get Friday off."

"Deal." He said with some discomfort as he attempted to withdraw. She tightened her grip and pulled him back.

"And Saturday." She said. He frowned.

"Two days een a row ees a leetle…" He started. She pulled him closer and he met her gaze. The sentence died in his throat.

"Gru, those girls are the best thing about you…don't blow that." She said, in a low thoughtful voice. He swallowed and nodded. She let go of his scarf and moved around him. Gru exhaled slowly and turned towards her retreating figure while straightening his scarf with some embarrassment.

She stopped in the doorway. For a moment it seemed as if she were battling with herself internally before she finally turned towards him.

"Um…thanks for…not letting me…blow up." She said with a hint of awkwardness. "Or…you know…using me as a shield…" She added before shutting the door behind her.

"Yeah, no problem." He said weakly. Gru stood where he was for a few minutes staring at the door. He was snapped out of his thoughts when Dr. Nefario cleared his throat. The older man had made his way down the stairs and was standing at the bottom of them with his hands folded behind his back. He had watched the exchange in silence and was now wearing a severe expression.

"Should we get to work then?" Gru nodded and followed him down to the lab.

XXX

"I think you're being paranoid." Nefario said as he sat at a counter in the lab with a large keyboard in front of him. "I mean, it's one thing if a villain tries to kill you after you've given them everything they want but doing it when the job is half done just doesn't make any sense."

"I am just wondering eef maybe we should 'ave looked eento her before we started sharing all ove thees information." Gru said bitterly, he was kneeling by the control panel that operated the mass atomizer. The back was open and the wires were exposed. Because Nefario was working on looking into the cookie bots Gru was working on getting the machine working right.

"Well maybe, but strictly speaking if I were to look into a villains background I would be more concerned to find that they _were_ trustworthy rather then not."

"Dat ees a point." Gru said wearily as he eyed one of his minions hammering at the corners of the control panel and occasionally hitting other minions over the head if they ventured too close. "Hey! You are not focusing, Dave! Go geet me another set ove thee blue wires." The minion eyed the hammer, threw in one last pummeling for good measure then set off to find the wires.

A silence opened up and was filled with the foreign chatter of minionese and exclamations of pain, which were basically the same in any language. After a moment Nefario looked up at his boss and cleared his throat.

"Um, Do you mind if I…have a word with you about something."

"Hmm?" Gru rubbed at his eyes wearily.

"Well…I've been thinking and maybe…it would be beneficial to you if you…left dealing with Miss Owens to me from now on." There was a slightly cautious quality to the man's voice, as if he had been working out how to bring the subject up. Gru raised his head and gave Nefario a puzzled look.

"What does she 'ave to do weeth anything?"

"Well, I think…maybe…she's become…a little bit of a distraction…to be honest." Gru stared at him for a moment, his mouth slightly agape.

"I don't…understand what you…" He started.

"I just think it's important that you're in the right state of mind when you meet with Miss de Molyneaux tomorrow…especially considering the circumstances…and…if you continue to associate with this girl…well nothing good can come of it."

"What are you implying?" Gru asked as he straightened, a bundle of chewed wires in his hand. Nefario shrugged with some discomfort. Gru stared at him for a moment longer before he turned his gaze toward a couple of minions who had paused in their work to watch and were chatting quietly to one another.

"Dare ga boss ablenken?" One asked.

"Nanoko." The other minion answered before making kissing sounds. They noticed Gru glaring at them and radiated innocence before returning to their work. Gru turned his exasperated expression back on Nefario who had returned his attention on the cookie bot with perhaps over exaggerated concentration.

"You think…dat I…" He started, color rising to his cheeks. Whether it was due to anger or embarrassment was unclear. "Dat ees ridiculous!"

"I'm just a little concerned that she may have gotten under your skin a little."

"Ove course she ees een my skin! Today hor and my mother were seeting een thee keetchen looking at my photo album and laughing at me! She has a retort for everything. No matter what I say to hor she turns eet back on me…I dreamed dat she threw me eento my own electric fence! You think I like dat!"

"She threw you…"

"I was tiny and een a jar," he said dismissively.

"Well…clearly…you're not fixed on her at all." Gru gave him a sideways look and sighed heavily before massaging his temples.

"Eef you want to deal weeth hor, then fine. I do not care." He said as he set the wires down heavily.

"Good, I think it'll be for the best."

"Yeah okay, fine. And I weel be wishing you luck with dat." Gru said sulkily while crossing his arms. He looked at Dave as he returned with the bundle of wires and took them before getting back to his work.

At around four o' clock in the morning Gru took the lift back up into the living room and started towards the stairs before he remembered that his bed was currently lying on it's side. He sighed and kicked off his shoes and sat on the crocodile couch. It was not an ideal place to sleep, but it appeared as if he really had no choice.

He dozed off fairly quickly but it turned out to be an awkward nights sleep. This was partially because the couch really wasn't all that comfortable and he woke up on multiple occasions feeling like his back and knees were uniting in rebellion, but there were other factors too.

On one occasion he woke up because Kyle had wandered over and decided to take advantage of the fact that Gru had his arm handing down from the couch and on another he woke up from a dream where he was in his dress clothes with curls and was being chased by cookie bombs. He screamed on the first occasion and had to resist the urge to do the same for the second.

He gave up at 6:30 and sat up, stretching and wincing as his back cracked uncomfortably. He grabbed the remote and turned the television on. The news was playing. The sound was all the way down, but there was a news feed at the bottom of the screen. They were talking about the missing men. Gru raised the remote to turn up the volume but paused when he heard a creak in the floorboards.

His first thought was that it was Kyle and as he looked towards the sound he automatically raised his socked feet from the floor out of self-defense. Margo was standing in the doorway. Gru relaxed and raised his brow.

"Margo, what are you doeeng up?"

"Um, I can't sleep, my glasses are beeping." She said as she walked into the living room. For a moment Gru's sleep deprived mind grasped in vain at the statement before she handed him the glasses. They were emitting a low noise similar to that of a cell phone alarm clock. Nefario had returned Margo's glasses to her the day before after finally fixing them. He'd been a little bitter about it and had grumbled something about not being an optometrist.

Gru turned them over bewilderedly as Margo crawled up on the couch next to him. He picked up the remote and pressed one of the buttons. Nefario appeared on the screen. He was still sitting at the computer, but had apparently dozed off and was snoring loudly.

"Dr. Nefario." Gru said loudly. "Hey!" The old man was startled awake and accidentally hit a series of buttons. For a moment a large red blinking light went off overhead and Nefario scrambled to reverse the process, emitting a lengthy sigh when it did. He cleared his throat and turned his attention on Gru and Margo.

"Sorry…was just…resting my eyes." Gru raised the glasses.

"Why are Margo's glasses beeping?"

"What? Oh…she must've accidentally triggered the optical calibration." Gru and Margo shared a look before Gru returned his gaze to the tv.

"…elaborate."

"Well if you go into option mode and wait more then fifteen minutes to choose a function it beeps to remind you." He stared at their blank faces for a moment before scowling. "Well you can't expect me to just fix a little girl's glasses Gru, I've worked for super villains for over seventy years…so I made a few adjustments. It isn't anything too dangerous. I installed a night vision and thermal scope, a 14X cat scope, a data and gps function and a taser."

"A taser…" Gru said weakly.

"Well yes, but it's just strong enough to stop someone, it isn't lethal or anything…and its voice activated so it can't be triggered accidentally."

"What triggers eet?" Gru asked.

"The words; 'I want a lemon meringue' will activate it. I was hungry." Gru held the glasses away from him and eyed them suspiciously. "I upped the frequency so it can only be set off by a high voice." Gru scowled at him.

"Um, how do you get the beeping to stop?" Margo asked from beside her father.

"Oh, just tap the left screw. Tap the right screw to start them up and shift through the functions, the left one turns them off." Gru tapped the screw on the left hand side and the glasses went quiet.

"Een thee future, eef you plan on arming my daughters, consult me forst." He said bitterly.

"Check." Gru turned the television off and handed the glasses back to Margo.

"I get to keep them?"

"Well, as long as eet ees not lethal, I suppose having something for self defense ees not a bad idea. Do NOT tell your seestor about these." He added as she took them, he stood up, planning to head to his room to see if any of his clothes survived the explosion.

"Are you taking us to dance class today?" Margo asked as she put her glasses back on and jumped off of the couch.

"Uhh, there has been a slight change een plans. I 'ave to work today."

"Oh." Margo said, with some disappointment.

"I will be around tomorrow though," he said, pausing in the doorway.

"Okay…" she replied. He sensed some doubt.

"And de next day…I promise," he added before heading towards the stairs.

XXX

In her apartment, Ady went to the kitchen and searched through the cabinets until she found a few stray packets of instant coffee. She ripped one open and poured the contents into a faded mug before dousing it with hot water. She set the cup down on the table, which rocked slightly, causing her to pause for a moment to perhaps muse as to why it might be doing that before she shook her head and picked up the remote. She turned the tv on and sat down.

Her and Dillon only got basic cable in their apartment, so the amount of channels available were rather slim. At this hour it largely consisted of the news and paid programming. The current channel was trying to sell some ugly porcelain bird with a vaguely demonic expression. Ady switched it over to a news network and watched for a while before turning the volume up a little.

The newscaster was going on rather excitedly about a various number of important missing persons from various countries.

"Hmm…weird," she and before absently grabbing her bag and sifting through it in search of her phone. She found it and then, after another cursory glance at the contents pulled out a few stray sheets of paper and unfolded them curiously.

They were the drawings from Edith and Agnes from the day before. Ady looked over them as she sipped at her coffee. After a moment she stood up and headed over towards the fridge. She selected a few magnets that weren't from a bar or a pizza place and hung them up. After she did so, she stared at them awkwardly for a moment and was considering taking them down again when Dillion walked in.

"What are you looking at?" She looked up as he stumbled into the room. His already messy hair had shifted in strange ways in the night and was now a greasy mass on his head.

"Hmm?" She said as she returned to the table.

"You have a weird look on your face." He said as he picked up the kettle of hot water and the last packet of instant coffee.

"Hey, why is the table rocking?"

"I think I may have fell into it."

"You think?"

"Well, I don't really remember doing it." Ady rolled her eyes. "We'll just put some cardboard under it or something. It'll be fine."

"Whatever. Do you mind if I borrow your car today?"

"I need it for work later. I thought you were going to come to the club with me and Nathan and Vanessa tonight."

"Yeah, there was kind of a…last minute change in plans… so I need to babysit today. We can still go…just pick me up at eight after the guy gets home. Then I wont have to pay for four cabs."

He didn't respond. He'd caught sight of the drawings and his expression contorted into something like disgust.

"What the hell are these?" Ady looked up.

"They're drawings," she said.

"Of what?" He said while turning his head sideways a little.

"Well…those are kittens…and that's a unicorn…in a scarf…and the blobby thing is me…I think. We're having a tea party. The other one's a guy blowing up." Dillon turned toward her with his eyebrow raised.

"Art is not your strong point Ads," she scowled at him.

"It's not mine. The girls I babysit drew them." He stared at her for a moment.

"You hung them up on the fridge?" She shrugged a little. He gave her a somber look, which was spoiled slightly by his bloodshot eyes and the mass of hair in his face.

"That's the sort of thing deranged parents do."

"It's only two pictures, I wasn't going to keep them up there for long." She said defensively. He crossed his arms.

"You remember Marcy Blackmore from Student Services?"

"This is nothing like that." Ady said, with some discomfort. "She had those pictures all over her desk and they were framed."

"I don't want to look at this crap Ady." He said as he pulled it off of the fridge. He was startled when Ady snatched it from him, having stood and crossed the kitchen to where he was standing. She put them back up and put her hand over them to deter him from touching them again.

"Hey, this is my apartment too, there should be boundaries. We moved here because there were no kids, remember?" Dillon said with some irritation.

"You really want to talk to me about boundaries?" Ady asked bitterly.

"I just don't get it. Ever since you started babysitting you've been acting weird. You've been spending all of your time over there, then there's the cooking and now there's this drawing thing." He paused for a moment. "Do you _like_ children?" The question was formed as if it were an accusation.

"I don't like children." Ady said as she removed her hand from the fridge. "But…I dunno, these kids are okay…they're different." She said as she picked up her coffee again and headed out of the kitchen. "You touch those and I'm going to make sure my jeans don't fit comfortably on you for a week." She added.

XXX

When Ady arrived at Gru's house a few hours later she was mildly surprised to find Nefario waiting there instead.

"Good morning, Miss Owens."

"Hey." She said as she set her bag down. "Have you been upgraded to doorman?" She added.

"Gru had to leave early this morning." Nefario said, ignoring the comment about being a doorman. "I also have been told to tell you that your scheduled time here will end at 7:30. He gave me the money to pay you." Ady raised her eyebrow before her gaze turned towards the stairs as the girls headed down into the hallway, dressed in the pink leotards.

"I've got the cab waiting outside," she said as she took the bag with their ballet slippers and various other items from Margo. "Tell him I'll miss his smiling face," she added to Nefario as she held the door open for the girls.

XXX

After working down in the lab for much of the night, Gru had managed to finish the control panel. He'd been hesitant about delivering it to Polina on the grounds that he didn't particularly feel like arming her, given the circumstances, but Nefario persuaded him to load it onto his ship by saying that in order to use it on him she would have to first get him strapped into one of the chairs. Given her arsenal of giant men, Gru didn't think she'd have a lot of difficulty doing this, but he grudgingly brought it with him anyways and just made sure to tuck extra weapons into his coat.

It was currently being installed in her containment area. She'd picked a spot specifically so that the men in the cell could see it being loaded in.

Gru's eyes flickered to Doug, who was once again just nearly out of eyesight. Polina was standing beside him, occasionally giving orders. She was wearing a dress adorned with fine white fur, that came to mid thigh. Her exquisite legs were wrapped in hosiery, which possibly, knowing her had been made from the skin of some long extinct animal and she was wearing boots with heels so sharp that Gru was frankly amazed that they weren't digging into the floor. His eyes were mostly drawn to these, particularly when she moved anywhere near his own feet and he was musing over whether or not his own shoes would be thick enough to stop them when she spoke to him, bringing him out of his thoughts.

"All 'ove ze bugs 'ave been worked out?" She asked, while smiling at him with her thickly painted lips.

"I believe so…we deed not 'ave time to test it." He said. He pulled a sheet of paper out of his pocket and handed it to her. "Thees ees thee code to activate it."

"As soon as et ez installed we will give et a try," she said as she took the page from him. "Doug, go fetch Linus. 'E as been slacking lately. If et ez working then we can move into ze final stage ove our plans," she added happily as Doug lumbered off.

"What ees thee final stage?" Gru asked warily. Her smile broadened a little.

"Follow me." She said as she turned, her heels made an awful sound on the floor. Gru sighed and followed her, while absently running his slender fingers over the bulk in his jacket for reassurance.

She stopped at a large door and opened a panel beside it. After she punched in a few numbers the door slid open and she stepped inside. Gru followed her with some hesitation.

There was a large screen covering one part of the wall, beneath it were various books and pages of schematics and diagrams. Polina moved to the screen and pressed a button on the board beneath it. A strange image of some bizarre form of machinery flashed onto the screen. Gru stared at it.

"Zey call it a Whirl Maker," she said as she moved next to him. "I love ze government, zey make being evil so easy."

"What ees eet?" Gru asked.

"I will show you," she said as she pulled out a box of cigarettes and emptied them carefully on one of the tables. She poked a hole in the bottom of it with one of her long fingernails and then picked up one of the cigarettes and placed it in her lips.

"Do you 'ave a light?" Gru patted his pockets before pulling out his lighter and flipping it open. She inhaled on the cigarette and then brought the cigarette box to her lips and blew into it. She then raised it up and tapped on it with her finger. A perfect smoke ring shot out of the tiny hole she'd made and hit Gru in the chest before dissipating.

"A bit primitive, but imagine something a thousand times bigger, a thousand times more accurate. If et ez placed in the correct spot, we could target anywhere en ze world."

"Weeth…cigarette smoke?" Gru asked. His thoughts were arriving sluggishly and he was beginning to feel a little ill.

"Ove course not. Ze whirl maker ez a weather making device for wielding and targeting strong winds."

"Where ees thees weapon located?"

"At a secret government facility. We will 'ave to steal eet. Et ez a very large weapon, but wis ze shrink ray zat part should be easy. Ze hard part will be getting it to ze location and installing it before et grows big again."

"Where are we going to put eet?" He asked while eyeing the image on the screen.

"Gru, I would sink you ove all people should 'ave an idea about that." She said as she smiled at him.

XXX

I really wanted to get this done before the movie came out but I really did not think that I would manage it. I figured I'd wind up getting it done on Thursday or Friday instead, but today was a really good writing day…possibly because I knew I needed to get finals done…and this was a way of avoiding it.

Originally this chapter was going to be at least five pages longer, but I cut it short because 1. Doing so allows me to post it. And 2. I really do have a lot of work I need to get done.

My semester is over on Wednesday of this week and I will be off until January 18th, so you'd better believe that I will be updating much more frequently in the coming weeks.

I hope everyone is having a wonderful day and that you are not going to mad over the wait for the DVD release (Like I am…Oh my god I can't wait! How am I going to focus on schoolwork tomorrow with that thing sitting on my coffee table? Gah!)

I totally understand if you can't be bothered to read this in light of those circumstances because…come on…it's the actual movie. XD

Thanks for your wonderful reviews! I love you all!

Btw, that weapon that Polina is trying to get a hold of may actually exist in some shape or form. I read about it on a website about secret government weapons. Sleep well!

To those of you without an account:

Rii: Yay exploding cookies! Wow frolicking…I feel honored. XD

Liros: You know…I didn't even think of that as an assassination attempt until after I wrote it…now I'm kind of just going with it. Sometimes plot points like to assert themselves without outside influence I guess. I'm glad you liked the line ^^


	14. Frozen Artichokes,

Chapter 13:

Frozen Artichokes, Dippin Dots and Chinese Salamander

Ady was sitting on the edge of the bench at the dance studio with the girls' bags at her feet. Beside her a well-dressed woman with an impressive bone structure had her phone open and was texting jadedly. She was one of many mothers on the bench who seemed bored out of their minds. Ady leaned back against the wall and blew a few errant hairs out of her eyes before fixing them on the young dancers.

There were nine or ten girls in tutus. A lot of them were under twelve years old and therefore went through the steps clumsily. One girl who was probably eight or nine was trying to get her mother's attention to show her a badly executed plie, another girl with dark hair was red in the face and crying rather loudly, whining about her feet hurting. Ady also recognized the child of the woman who had tried to engage her in conversation on the previous occasion. It was a mystery what she was trying to do, but despite her incredibly limited knowledge of ballet, she guessed that the child was going wrong somewhere.

She gave the mothers on the bench another sideways look; most of them weren't paying attention to their kids, stumbling, falling, crying, and making silly jumps with a proud determination on their faces. Ady had never understood the attraction of ballet.

Her green eyes rested finally on Margo, Edith and Agnes. They had grouped together and she noticed that whenever Margo's steps took her away from the other two, Agnes would break away from whatever she was doing to close the distance.

For while she watched them. Margo wasn't too bad. Her face was set in serious concentration as if she were paying very close attention to every movement she was making. Agnes on the other hand smiled and bounced and lost her balance but unlike a lot of the younger girls around her she didn't seem too bothered by it. Instead of crying or complaining she'd laugh. Occasionally, as if taking cues from her older sister she would try, ineffectively to 'get serious' and would stick her tongue out with grim determination and try to go through the steps. Edith on the other hand…

"Oh for goodness sake, Edith." She heard the dance instructor say, breaking her out of her thoughts. "Please take off your boots, you keep stepping on the other children's toes." Ady smiled a little in amusement.

XXX

"Sink about et. Ze moon rotates around ze earth every 24 hours. We'd 'ave access to every continent on ze earth's surface." Polina was saying as her and Gru stood on one of the glass platforms overlooking the mass atomizer. Gru sighed heavily.

"Eet took me weeks to geet ready for thee forst launch." Gru said with some irritation. "And thee rocket ees completely…" Polina interrupted him with a laugh. It was a pleasant laugh, almost musical, certainly not maniacal or evil. Still Gru grimaced slightly.

"You will not 'ave to build a rocket. I can get you as many as you need wizout trouble. Our biggest concern es getting all 'ove our equipment hooked up to ze whirl maker before et grows large again and pepple notice et. I have been experimenting with your shrink ray. Taking notes and charting how certain things react and how long zey stay shrunk. According to my research, we should 'ave about a week as long as we 'ave ze ray on ze second setting."

"Setting…?" She raised her eyebrow at him.

"Zere are three. Did you experiment wiz it at all?"

"…Apparently not…" Her gaze shifted sideways to where Doug was suddenly standing, as if he had materialized somewhere near Gru's right shoulder. Gru scowled. A man that big should not be that quiet, whether he had a tongue or not.

"Ah, apparently Linus es strapped en place. Shall we test ze atomizer?" Gru nodded wearily.

Linus, was a massive man like all of the others with huge hands and a fray of blonde hair on his head. He was strapped into one of the chairs with a slightly confused expression on his face.

"You are…using one 'ove your menions?"

"Zis sort of thing keps them in line." Polina said as they stood at the control panel. She pulled out the slip of paper Gru had given her with the code on it and punched it in carefully.

"I imageene eet does."

"Zere are plenty more where he came from." Gru frowned. His minions weren't particularly bright, but even they would be wary of being disintegrated. He eyed Doug, who was just staring ahead. If he was upset or worried, then it was not showing.

"Would you like to do ze honors?" Polina's voice broke through his musings.

"Um…perhaps we could start weeth something dat ees not organic." Gru replied. "In case thee bugs are not worked out…"

"You have doubts?"

"No…not doubts…eet would just be…kind 'ove unpleasant eef we had thee same result as last time."

"I see…I suppose et would be rather messy. Zis es a new coat. Doug fetch the fur rug from ze living room. I need a new one anyways." Doug lumbered off.

Gru folded his hands behind his back and straightened with some awkwardness as they waited.

"Dey are…very…compliant." Gru said while nodding towards Linus.

"Ze trepanning helps." She replied before turning towards him.

"Trepanning?"

"You drill a tiny hole in zere heads. Old surgical procedure. Hit ze right spot and the most intelligent men in ze world can be reduced to slobbering idiots…not zat zey were all zat intelligent to begin wiz."

Gru swallowed, his blue eyes flashing towards Doug as he returned with the rug and placed it on one of the chairs. Polina gestured toward the lever.

Gru wrapped his long fingers around it and pulled. Both villains watched as the rug was reduced to a pile of ash.

"Eet looks to be een working order." Gru said as he stepped back.

"Indeed et does. Very well done." Polina replied, clearly pleased. "Now let us see how ze machine works on living tissue."

XXX

The dancing instructor stopped Ady at the door on their way out.

"Excuse me miss…"

Ady stopped, her eyes on Agnes who was running around in circles happily for no apparent reason.

"Do you know if Mr. Gru is coming to next weeks practice?" She looked up at the instructor and shrugged a little.

"Well, I'd better give you this…to pass along to him…just in case." She said as she handed a small cheap looking ticket to her. "I'm sure he's aware that there's a recital coming up…I know he wasn't able to make it to the last one."

"Uh…okay. I'll make sure he gets it." She said as she cast a cursory look at the ticket before shoving it in the pocket of her sweatshirt.

"Do we have to take the bus again?" Edith asked while absently stomping on the cracks on the sidewalk.

"Nah, I brought cash for a cab this time." Ady replied as she shut the door to the dance studio behind her. She placed a hand on Agnes' head to halt the small girl. "You…are making me dizzy."

"Wasn't dad supposed to take us to dance class today?" Edith asked.

"Originally."

"But you're here instead."

"Yep." Ady said as she opened her phone and balanced it on her shoulder so that she could readjust the bags she was holding.

"Why?"

"I don't know Edith." She said. Agnes had started bouncing around again the minute Ady had released her.

"It's because he likes spending time with that scary lady more then us." She said bitterly before pulling her hat down over her eyes and crossing her arms. Ady opened her mouth to say something and the movement dislodged her cell phone, which slipped into one of the bags.

"Aw crap." She said as she set the bags down. Margo, who had been putting her converses back on stood up to help her look. Agnes halted and was staring at Edith, wide eyed.

"You really think daddy likes her more?"

"He'll probably marry her and we'll all be made into ugly coats." Edith responded. Agnes tugged at Margo's tutu urgently.

"I don't want to be an ugly coat."

"Edith, cut it out. No ones going to be made into a coat, Agnes. And dad's…he's just working with her."

Ady untangled her phone from some ballet slippers and lifted out of the bag. She eyed the girls. Edith was sitting on the street curb with her chin in her palm and her hat pulled down as far as it would go and Agnes was standing with her tiny fingers still curled around Margo's sleeve and her head rested on the girl's shoulder. Margo met Ady's gaze doubtfully as she hoisted a few of the bags on her own shoulders. Ady shifted uncomfortably.

"Uh, do you guys want to do something before we head back to your house? Get food or something?" She asked while shutting her phone.

"Can we get ice cream?" Agnes asked, perking up a little as she grabbed Ady's leg and looked up at her with her giant brown eyes.

"Yeah, ice cream." Edith said.

"Ice cream isn't food." Ady replied as she attempted to detach Agnes. She looked at Margo for help.

"There's usually a cart outside the entrance to that small beach a few blocks down." The older girl said with a shrug.

"I don't know that you need sugar." She said to Agnes who had climbed a few inches.

"Please." Agnes asked while burying her tiny face in Ady's pant leg. The woman sighed.

"Okay…but let's get lunch first. Looks like there's a pizza place over there. Could you pry your sister off of me?" She added to Margo while nodding down to Agnes.

"She'll let go when she gets tired." Margo said with a small smile before motioning for Edith to take her hand to cross the street. The younger girl stuck her tongue out. Ady stuffed her hands in her pockets and followed the two girls at an awkward gate while Agnes giggled at shoe level.

The Pizza Place was called the Haggles. The minute they walked in Ady regretted suggesting it. There were a lot of kids there, most of them with their mothers or on play dates. They were screaming and laughing and talking loudly. Most of them had pizza sauce all over their faces and they probably had sticky hands.

"Ugh." Ady made a sound of disgust before turning back towards the door.

"Hey." Margo said before grabbing her hand. "Come on, it's not that bad." Ady sighed and allowed herself to be pulled in. They headed to a booth near one of the large windows. Ady lifted her foot, which was still towing Agnes and set her sandal down on the seat.

"Come on kid," She said while attempting, with care to shake the toddler off. Agnes let go and scooted down the seat.

"All right, what do you guys want?" Ady asked as she sat down and straightened her sandal.

"Can we have pepperonis?" Agnes asked.

"I want sausage." Edith added. "And stuffed crust."

"Stuffed crust!" Agnes repeated in a slightly manic voice while pulling on Ady's sleeve.

"Okay! Jeez!" She said while pulling her sleeve from the little girl. "Margo?" She added as she stood.

"I'm fine with that." Margo said. Ady raised her eyebrow.

"You don't want to add anything?" The girl shrugged a little.

"Seriously? Peppers, olives, onions…fish?"

"Um…I kind of like mushrooms." She said with a hint of shyness.

"Okay, mushrooms then."

"Yuck, mushrooms are gross." Edith said while playing with a napkin dispenser.

"Well you can just pick them off." Ady said before taking the dispenser from Edith. "You guys stay here." She added as she headed towards the counter. She turned back towards them as another thought occurred to her. "I can see you from the counter so don't even think about wondering off or anything."

XXX

After they finished lunch they headed towards a somewhat battered road which ran down to a small man made beach. There was an ocean not far from the city, perhaps a twenty minute drive, so it was a mystery why the man made beach was even put there but there it was. Outside, by a the gate where cars paid for the honor of parking near the mock beach with the ocean that smelled as if a thousand things had died there and there was indeed an ice cream stand outside. The stand, as it turned out was selling Dippin Dots, which the girls had never heard of. Ady purchased four of the cups from a man who was eying them oddly. This was in part because Edith had pulled her hat all the way down again and was walking around blindly with her arms out and in part because Agnes had immediately reattached herself to Ady's leg once they'd left the pizzeria.

Ady handed one of the cups to Margo and used another to bate Agnes off of her leg. Margo took Agnes by the hand and sat down on the street curb.

Agnes motioned for Ady to join them. After grabbing Edith by the arm to keep her from walking into a fray of bushes planted near the gate, Ady handed her her ice cream and pulled her over to the other two girls.

"What is this stuff?" Edith asked while eyeing the cup critically and sitting heavily on the curb.

"Dippin dots." Ady replied with a sigh.

"It looks weird."

"It's supposed to look like that." She said. Margo took Agnes' cup from her and detached a small plastic spoon from the top before opening it and handing it back to the girl. Agnes received it and started eating happily.

"What flavor is it?"

Ady eyed hers after she pulled the top off.

"I dunno." She said as she turned the cup over in her hands to look at the ingredients. There weren't any. "Hopefully fruit…"

"It looks like those rocks you put in fish bowls."

"Hey you wanted ice cream, this is ice cream."

XXX

Gru and Polina had left the containment area and the mass atomizer and were walking down the long hall with the portraits of Polina's ex husbands. Polina had slipped her gloved hand around Gru's arm. Gru was staring dismally forward.

"We will 'ave to steal ze Whirl Maker in ze next couple ove days. In ze meantime I will put en a call to get ze rocket." Polina said, shaking him out of his thoughts. "For now, how about we 'ave some lunch." Gru frowned.

When one was a villain one learned to watch out for a few things. Among those t things was the notion of accepting food from another villain when there was suspicion that said villain recently tried to blow you up.

"I theenk I will 'ave to decline." Gru said carefully. "I…am not very hungry."

"I will not take no for an answer Gru." Polina said as she wrapped her other hand around Gru's arm as well and pulled him toards the dining room. "You will 'ave never tasted food like mine before. It ez a rare experience." Gru sighed heavily.

A few minutes later Gru was sitting at a massive table trying to remember all of the details about poisons commonly used in preparing food. He had a massive leather bound book about it in the cabinet in his kitchen, but he rarely used it. Poisons weren't really his thing unless they were being used in paralytics or darts or weapons of some sort.

Poison Hemlock could be used to make salad, but he'd recognize that immediately. Other then that there were any number of berries, leaves and nuts to avoid. Was it curare or savin that worked too fast for an antidote…didn't they both have a bitter taste? He probably wouldn't notice it if she slipped it in that wine though and also was it the barabados nut that tasted pleasantly or seeds from Jimsonweed? Gru groaned and sat back in the chair.

Polina was sitting across with him, regarding him through a thin stream of fine cigarette smoke. After a few minutes a couple of Polina's massive cronies came in weighted down with decadent food, which they placed on the table. A glass of wine was put in front of both Gru and Polina as well. Well, he needn't of worried about salad in any case.

Gru stared at the food for a few moments. Most of it stared back.

"Ees dat a giraffe?" He asked. He really needn't have asked, the evidence was looking right at him.

"Et ez. Ze dish on ze left ez Chinese salamander, zis ez bluefish tuna sushi and zat ez a pangolin."

"Pangolin?" Gru asked, while staring at the incredibly ugly carcass of what was apparently a giant Chinese salamander.

"A little bit like an anteater. All of zese creatures are delicacies somewhere around ze world…or zey were before zey were wiped out." She said as she cut a petite sized portion from the salamander. Gru swallowed heavily and picked up a knife. Poison hemlock was looking better already.

XXX

Gru returned to the house couple hours later. Nefario was up on the big screen. His attention was on a processor in front of him. He looked up when Gru entered the living room.

"Gru, what are you doing here. Weren't you supposed to be at Miss de Molyneux's for a few more hours?"

"I…was not feeling well..." He said. "Why do you 'ave thee video phone up?"

"I was keeping an eye out for Miss Owens." Gru pulled out his cell phone to check the time.

"Eet ees nearly five o' clock, thee gurls dance practice should 'ave been over at two thirty." Nefario shrugged.

"So…is that the only reason…you came home early then?" Gru scowled at the older man.

"Eet must've been sometheeng I ate." He said darkly. "Eet does not matter anyways. Thee atomizer works and we're down to thee last phase ove thee plan. Apart from monitoring thee cookie bots dere was notheeng for me to do over dere."

"Oh? What's the last phase?"

"Well, apparently we are putting a five million pound weather making machine on de moon so dat we can destroy things weeth something dat resembles blowing smoke eento a cigarette pack." Gru said as he sat down on the couch and massaged his temples.

"We're…wait…what?"

"I don't know. I guess thee government uses eet to shoot planes down or sometheeng. Polina wants us to start designing a seestum to control eet from her house. She's not geeving us much time."

"Well, we'll get right on it then."

Gru straightened a little at the sound of the front door opening. A moment later the girls spilled in.

"Daddy!" Agnes said happily, when they reached the living room. She ran up to him and hugged his legs. Gru gave her a tired smiled and picked the small girl up.

"You're home?" Margo asked as she set down the bag she had been holding. Edith had moved into the living room as well and approached the large television screen.

"Hey, what are you working on uncle Nefario?" She said as she moved up to the screen. Dr. Nefario moved back automatically.

"Something very complicated that you would most likely not understand."

"Does it blow up?"

"No, I'm doing research."

"Oh…that's boring." Edith said while getting an inch or so away from the screen and making faces.

"Gru." Nefario said.

"Do not bother Doctor Nefario, Edith." Gru said as he grabbed her around her waist and pulled her away from the computer. "How was dance class?"

"The teacher made me sit most of it out."

"Why deed she do dat?" Gru asked with a frown.

"She was wearing her boots and she kept stepping on everyone's feet." Margo said as she sat down beside Agnes and her father.

"Where are your ballet sleepers?" He asked. Edith shrugged.

"Daddy," Agnes said as she shook his arm. "We got pizza and ice cream and Edith said it was shaped like rocks but it tasted good anyways."

"Oh er…huh?"

He looked up at the doorway as Ady set the bags down and fixed him with a dour look.

"You're home pretty early for someone who spent the last two days whining about all of the important things you had to do today." She said.

"Whining?" Gru said with some annoyance. "I deed 'ave theengs to do…dey just deedn't..." He started.

On the screen Nefario cleared his throat a little, interrupting him.

"Gru, perhaps we should make a start on that…thing we're supposed to do." He said pointedly.

"I was just…I wasn't…" Gru started before glowering a little. "All right." He said as he scooped Agnes off of his lap and set her down. "Why don't you gurls go play een your room?"

"Will you play with us?" Agnes asked.

"Gru and I have a lot of work to do." Nefario said, before Gru could answer. "It's best if you girls take Miss Owens and leave us for a while." Ady raised her brow at Gru who cleared his throat.

"We will play lator Agnes." He said.

"So does this mean I'm still on the clock?" Ady asked while crossing her arms.

"Yes." Gru said. "I am goeeng downstairs so stay out ove thee leeving room." He said as he ushered the girls into the hallway.

"Are you going to eat dinner with us?" Margo asked. Gru looked at the tv screen briefly before returning his gaze to her.

"We will see." He said.

"Come on." Ady said after a moment. "We'll find something to do."

"Can we play with the styling head?" Agnes asked as she grabbed Ady's hand.

"What's a styling head?"

"It's a big head with pretty hair you can brush."

"Why?" Ady asked, as the young girl dragged her down the hall. Edith and Margo followed. When they got halfway to the stairs Margo hesitated.

"We left are bags with our clothes in them in the living room." She said. "I should get them before dad activates the lift." Ady nodded vaguely as she was pulled up the spiral starcase.

Margo headed back to living room. Her father and Doctor Nefario were talking. She caught a few words, which caused to hesitate and then take cover behind one of the decorations in the hall.

"I am plenty focused on thee task at hand." Gru was saying with some irritation. "Eef I am distracted eet ees not because of hor and I do not appreciate thee eemplication. Deed you find anytheeng more out about thee cookie bomb?" He continued, perhaps wishing to change the subject.

"Not yet." Nefario replied.

"What 'ave you been doeeng all day?"

"It takes time to link the systems up… I basically have to hack into our own computer program. I may have taken a nap…but it couldn't have been more then an hour or so." Gru scowled. "Personally I don't know why she would go to the trouble of blowing you up. It would probably be easier to get rid of you while you're over there if it comes to that." the old man added. The villain sighed.

"Thank you doctor…dat…dat makes me feel a lot better…" He said bitterly. "Look, dat theeng was een my pocket all evening. Eef eet had gone off five minutes orlier when I was een thee gurls room…" he paused, as if he didn't want to finish the thought. "Just…feegur eet out pleez."

"All right. Give me a couple more hours. For now, why don't you come down to the lab and start on the new project?"

Margo broke away from the wall and headed back towards the stairs quietly.

"Where's are clothes?" Edith asked as she headed into their bedroom. she was lying on her stomach on the bed above where Ady was sitting among a mass of pillows on the floor. The younger girl was sorting through various bows and barrettes jadedly. Margo considered mentioning what she had heard then disregarded the idea on the basis that she did not want to worry her sisters.

"The lift was already up. I'll get them later." She said finally before sitting on the edge of her bed. Agnes was working on brushing the hair on the doll head. Ady had pulled a book out of her bag and was reading. She had her elbow rested on the edge of one of the beds and her head in her palm.

"What…are you doing?" Ady asked after a moment when she felt Edith sifting through her hair.

"Nothing." Edith responded.

"Well…can you stop doing it?"

"Nuh uh."

"Why don't you help your sister with the doll head…?"

"That's boring." Ady sighed.

XXX

At around seven o' clock the doll head was thrust into Ady's vision. She had been absorbed in her book, as well as trying to ignore Edith's experimentations with her hair. She looked up and raised her eyebrow.

"Isn't she pretty?"

"Uhh...yeah" The girl had tried to braid the perfect blonde doll hair and the result was a series of very lopsided braid clumps. Agnes pulled the doll back with a proud smile as Ady checked the time.

"It's probably around dinner time." She said as she sat up, pausing slightly as a few bows fell in front of her gaze. She frowned and touched the top of her head.

"You look funny." Agnes said happily.

Ady wiped her hand across her short red hair, sending a handful of barrettes of all sizes to the ground. Edith and Agnes giggled a little. Ady shot them a slightly exasperated look. After a moment it shifted into amusement and while Edith was hanging down from her bed, the woman quickly snatched the girls hat off. Edith immediately stopped laughing and glowered at her.

"Hey, give it back." She said as she jumped down from her bed and reached for it. Ady stuffed it in her sweatshirt pocket.

"Nope," she responded with a smile, as she grabbed the girl and held her in place while she plucked barrettes from her own hair and placed them clumsily on Edith's blonde head.

As she did this she happened to look up at Margo who was cleaning up the accessories and the styling head quietly. The older girl had been very quiet in the last few hours.

"You all right, kid?" Ady asked, finally letting Edith go. The girl wrenched her hat from Ady's pocket and shoved it overtop the mess of barrettes.

"Huh…oh yeah, fine. Just thinking." Margo responded. Ady hoisted herself up.

"You wanna help me with dinner?"

"I guess." Margo said with a shrug.

"Well come on, let's go wreck your dad's kitchen."

XXX

A little while later they were in the process of making pork chops. Ady was mixing duck eggs in a bowl because the recipe called for the pork chops to be dipped in it and Margo was slowly stirring a cream of mushroom soup, which apparently was supposed to be poured over it when they were finished.

Ady leaned over the soup.

"Hey, that looks great. When I ruin the porkchops we can smother it in your soup and no one will notice." She said as she nudged Margo, who smiled a little.

The pork chops were half cooked when they heard the lift from the living room. Dr. Nefario entered a few minutes later.

"Well it's 7:30. You're dismissed." He said, frowning as Agnes slipped down from the chair she was sitting in and scampered over to him

"Uh, we were kind of in the middle of making dinner." Ady said. "Besides, my ride doesn't get here until eight…and knowing him he'll be an hour late." She added.

"Do you want to eat dinner with us Uncle Nefario?" Agnes asked.

"I'm very busy." He said while stepping sideways to put a stool between him and the child. "I believe I was clear this morning." He added to Ady.

"Yeah, well, tell Gru that if he wants me to leave early he can tell me himself." Ady said. "Does that look brown to you?" She asked Margo who had stopped stirring and was watching them. She shrugged.

"All right, well…we'll leave it on a little longer I guess."

"Listen miss. I have been asked to deal with you personally from now on." Nefario said while shaking his leg slightly to keep Agnes from latching onto it. Ady straightened and regarded Dr. Nefario with a slightly piqued look.

"Deal with me?" Ady asked.

"Yes. Gru is too busy for this sort of thing."

"Ah, so are you Gru's secretary or just some old guy who lives in his basement?" Nefario's face-hardened a little insofar as one could tell considering the massive amount of wrinkles.

"I'll have you know, miss, that there are things I've accomplished that would shock and horrify you." He said while unfolding his hands and balling them up into fists at his side. "In my time I was both feared and respected. I will not be insulted by a babysitter."

Ady eyed him blankly.

"So that was like…in the twenties?" Nefario scowled. "Did any of things involve getting flimflammed?"

"That's it, I don't have to take this." He said before heading towards the door, while giving Agnes a wide berth. Ady met Margo's gaze and shrugged.

XXX

Gru was down in the lab sitting at one of the counters with a large page with the grid of the moon across its surface and a series of paragraphs in tiny lettering. Gru had amassed quite a lot of information about outer space and interstellar travel in his time. It was nice to know that it was coming in handy. He had a small eyepiece over his left eye. The eyepiece doubled as a magnifying glass and binoculars. It was supposed to be used for spying, but mostly these days Nefario used it as reading glasses. Occasionally Gru adjusted it so he could read the tiny lettering on the page.

He looked up as doctor Nefario shuffled by, muttering something about not being a secretary. The old man walked over to a shelf and shifted through the contents briefly before bringing out a large gun.

"What are you doeeng?"

He paused on his way back to the lift.

"See if she's not more civil after she's been flung bodily around the room for a little while." Gru opened his mouth and watched wide eyed as the doctor stepped on the lift and headed back up. He frowned and after a moment pulled the eyepiece off and followed the old man.

XXX

"All right miss. This is a Zero point energy gun. Do you know what that means?" Nefario said as he once again entered the kitchen. Ady turned towards him and eyed the barrel pointing in her direction. She grabbed Margo's arm and pulled her back.

"Hey, man watch where you're pointing that." She said.

"I've designed this weapon so that it has a very accurate targeting system. I can pick any object up from a mile away." He said while flipping a few dials on the side. He frowned, as apparently one wasn't giving him the desired response.

"I should really invest in new machinery…blasted recycled technology." He muttered to himself before turning the gun away and pounding on it. There was a brief spark and then a bust of energy shot out from the barrel and picked up the chainsaw on the other side of the room. "Oops." Nefario said while eyeing the suspended chainsaw. He looked down at the dials again, squinting in order to see them clearly. "Now which one was it…"

Ady and Margo watched the chainsaw uneasily. Margo motioned for Edith and Agnes to come over. Agnes did so immediately. Edith hesitated.

"Cool." She said. Ady grabbed her by her collar and pulled her away from it.

"Oh here it is." Nefario said as he pushed a button. The chainsaw flew through the kitchen, missing Nefario by a few feet as it rushed towards the doorway. Gru had just left the lift and had made it to the kitchen in time to dodge the ballistic chainsaw by throwing himself hurriedly against the wall.

"Hey!" He said.

"Sorry, all right, now I've got it." Nefario said, as he flipped the correct switches and raised the gun again. Gru broke away from the wall and made to grab at it, pulling the barrel away from Ady and the girls. As he did, Nefario pulled the trigger by accident and Gru found himself hanging upside down a few feet above the floor.

"Oh…blast…hold on Gru."

Gru said something that was muffled as his coat slipped down over his head. This was probably for the best as the response most likely contained words not suitable for children. Ady covered her mouth to keep from laughing, particularly when Gru's gray turtleneck also started slipping down.

"I just have to find the button to drop you." Nefario added. "Ah, here it is!" The doctor said triumphantly. A moment later Gru was flung bodily over the island and crashed into the wall above the stove before falling on top of it and then landing in a heap on the floor. What was left of the eggs and the mushroom soup landed on top of him a moment later.

"Oh…that wasn't it." Dr. Nefario said.

Ady and the girls had dropped to the floor when Gru was flung towards them.

"Dad!" Margo exclaimed as she and her sisters stood and approached him.

He groaned as Ady removed the bowl of raw eggs from his head.

"Gru, can you hear me?" Dr. Nefario asked, as he too approached. "How many fingers am I holding up?" Gru looked up blearily, his gaze coming even with the barrel of the gun Nefario was still holding. He grunted and pushed it away before glaring at the older man.

"Oh, sorry. I guess there are a few kinks I still have to work out." Gru continued to glare at him.

"Take…eet …away." Gru said, his voice low.

"Right. I'll just…lock this up in the lab." He said before clearing his throat and heading toward the living room.

"Are you all right, daddy?" Agnes asked as Gru struggled to his feet, Cream of Mushroom soup dripping down his coat.

"I am fine, Agnes" He said, grimacing slightly.

"Your nose is bleeding." Edith said, wide eyed. He touched his hand to the base of his nose. It was indeed bleeding. He had also hit his head and banged his hip, both of which were screaming at him.

"Eet will be fine." He said as he sat down at one of the stools and grabbed at the paper towels.

"Should we continue dinner?" Margo asked. Ady frowned and eyed the oven.

"I think the pork chops are burnt…the rest of it's kind of on your dad." She said.

Edith pulled herself up onto a stool next to Gru.

"Your nose is bleeding a lot." She said after a while.

"I noticed." Gru replied, his voice had a slightly nasal quality to it.

"I think it's turning purple."

"I appreciate thee observation."

"Your eyes look a little bit funny too."

"Edith, I 'ave a really bad headache right now." Gru said.

"Is it because of that huge bump?" Agnes asked while attempting to pull herself up next to her father as well.

"Come on guys, leave dad alone." Margo said as she pulled Agnes back down.

"Aww." Agnes said disappointingly.

"Why don't you guys go sit down at the table?" Ady said.

"Why? What are we going to eat?" Edith asked.

"I dunno…leftovers I guess." Edith stuck her tongue out but dropped from the stool and headed towards the table anyways.

Ady turned the stove off and after searching through the fridge briefly pulled out the meatloaf Gru's mother had made the night before. She eyed Gru for a moment. He was leaning back in the stool with the paper towels balled up at the base of his nose.

"You're doing that wrong." She said after a moment. His blue eyes shifted to her as she scooped up some of the meatloaf onto plates and served it to the girls.

"I am perfectly capable ove stopping a nose bleed." He said wearily.

"Yeah, well I'm sure loads have people have tried to punch you in the nose." She said as sat next to him. He eyed her awkwardly as she put her hand over the hand he had over his nose and grabbed his shoulder. "So you're probably used to this and it is a pretty big target, but you're supposed to lean forwards, not back." She said as she pushed him down a little so that he was bent over.

"So you're an expert." Gru said with some cynicism, mostly to cover up his sudden bewilderment.

"I used to get in a lot of fights when I was younger."

"Dat…ees not surprising me." He replied, his voice slightly muffled. Ady stood, removing her hands, much to Gru's relief.

"Yeah well, according to your mom I probably got into as many as you did. Only difference is I _won_ most of mine." She said as she shifted through the contents of Gru's freezer.

He raised his head to say something but she placed her hand over his ear and gently pushed his head back down again.

"Don't move your head." She said. Gru felt a chill where he'd hit his head as Ady placed a bag of frozen vegetables over the lump.

"What are you doeeng, what ees dat?" He asked uncomfortably.

"Frozen artichokes. They're all you have." She added. It occurred to him that she seemed to be studying his face. His blue eyes flickered uneasily from her fixed gaze.

"You know, your nose is turning purple." She said after a moment. "You're going to have two nasty black eyes." She added. She was disturbingly close and he was aware that we was feeling uncomfortably warm, although part of it may have been the burns that he sustained from the mushroom soup. Either way, Gru cleared his throat and broke away from the counter.

"Well, I should get back to work."

"You're nose is still bleeding." Ady said, still holding the frozen artichokes and looking slightly surprised.

"I will, take care ove dat, over…somewhere else." He said while heading towards the door, accidentally banging his shin against the counter in his effort to get away. Ady set the bag of frozen vegetables down and raised her brow.

XXX

I know it's horribly late…again. The holidays kind of kicked my butt this year. Oo I wound up having to do a lot of the cooking and shopping because my mom hasn't been feeling well and then I've spent the last week seeing friends who are going back to college next week.

Hopefully the chapter came out all right. It changed a lot in the course of writing it. It was actually supposed o go an entirely different way and then…just didn't. This sometimes happens.

To those of you who don't have an account, or I did not respond to:

Rii: Hehehe I'm glad you like it. Pffftt good at Science? I go to art school; my ineptness at science is only secondary to that of math. I just try to research stuff for these stories so that it sounds like I know what I'm talking about. Hopefully the chapter did not dissapoint ^^

Roolsilver: I am glad that you like it and thank you for the compliments on my Ocs ^^ Hehehe, that's a great image…annnd now it's stuck in my head as well.

Magical Girl 123: Thank you ^^ I do not intend to let it lapse. Hopefully now that the holidays are done I can spend the rest of my break indulging in some writing and get this thing updated in less then two to three weeks for once.

IamYourPhobia: I like to respond to everyone in order to show my appreciation. : ) Hopefully the no longer subtle hints are to your liking ^^ Thanks for the review.

MadiganKeen: Thank you very much ^^ I don't really have a copyright on babysitter ideas. I'm sure as it is that there are other fics in this section that are doing it, so you don't really have to ask, nor do you have to give me credit so long as your story is completely your own otherwise. Thanks for the review ^^

Have a good New Years guys!


	15. Spying On The Big Boss

Chapter 14:

Spying On The Big Boss

"Oh, Gru. I was just about to call you." Dr. Nefario said as Gru stepped off of the lift and crossed over to him. "Wow…you know you're nose is turning purple." Gru fixed him with a frustrated expression and the doctor shifted under the weight of the man's glare before clearing his throat. "Anyways, I have the information on the cookie bots."

"Great." Gru said morosely as he sat down and leaned forward slightly in order to continue to treat his nosebleed. His head was pounding. At least the cookie bot offered some form of distraction even if said distraction consisted of the knowledge of whether or not someone was trying to kill him.

"I have good news and bad news." Nefario's voice broke through Gru's thoughts.

"What ees de good news?" He asked while shifting slightly.

"As far as I can tell the explosion was a malfunction. The bomb wasn't detonated."

"Oh…well dat ees a relief. So what ees de bad news?" He asked, raising his head a little. "Apart from thee fact dat een de last couple ove days I was nearly keeled twice because ove your malfunctions."

"The zero point energy gun didn't really malfunction…it did work…there was just some delay and I accidentally picked you up instead of Miss Owens."

"Just tell me de bad news." Gru said heavily.

"Right, well, while it was not detonated it _was _activated prior to the explosion."

"Activated?" It took a moment for this to sink in. Gru straightened. "She was spyeeng on me?"

"Apparently…it is still better then blowing you up…you must admit." He cleared his throat. "You didn't…do anything that might hurt us in that time did you?"

"Uhh…" Gru stared forward for a moment and his eyes became briefly unfocused. "Oh…"

"What? What is it?"

"Well…my mother was here…and…I…read de gurls a bedtime story…" He said awkwardly. Nefario frowned.

"I suppose…that isn't…too bad. It could be worse." Gru nodded. He was thinking about One Big Unicorn. It could be worse, but it could also be a lot better.

He stood with a sigh and took a few steps toward the lift. A thought occurred to him and he frowned before pulling out his cell phone and looking at the time. It was almost eight o' clock. If he waited a little longer Ady would be gone. He changed his course, reasoning that he was doing so not because he was in dread of seeing Ady again but because ehe had a lot of work to do.

He sat down at the table where he had left the research. Dr. Nefario looked up at him, mildly surprised as he pulled the magnifying lens up to his eye again and squinted at the tiny writing. He set his cell phone by the page. Between his headache and the constant glances at the time, it was unlikely that he would make much progress.

XXX

When Gru returned to the living room at 9:00 he lingered there for a moment. He frowned and after folding his hands behind his back and casting a cursory look in the hallway he headed up towards the stairway with the intention of saying goodnight to the girls if they were still awake and then seeing about getting his bed tipped back over so he didn't have to sleep on the couch again.

"Oh hey, Gru…" The result was somewhat aggressive. Gru shouted and wound up on the large Rhino chair. Actually it was very similar to how he reacted with Kyle, except that it would be hard to imagine how pulling his legs up would deter a young woman.

Ady paused in the kitchen doorway eyeing him like he'd gone mad. After a moment Gru unfolded his legs and straightened with as much dignity as he could gather in the circumstances.

"A little jumpy?" She asked before crossing her arms with some amusement.

"Eet ees nine o' clock, what are you still doeeng here?" He asked with some irritation.

"My ride's late." She said before approaching him. She was digging through her sweatshirt pocket. "Here, the lady at the dance studio asked me to give this to you." She added as she pulled the ticket out. Gru stared at it, his embarrassment momentarily forgotten as he finally took the tiny piece of what was essentially a square of construction paper and carefully flipped it over in his fingers, regarding the wording.

**Tightes and Tutus Dance Studio Presents: An Excerpt From Sleeping Beauty. **

"It's for next Saturday. So…I'm taking that day off."

"Fine." He said, tearing his eyes away from the ticket.

"So, there wont be any last minute negotiations…threats to my life…explosions…your secretary won't try to throw you at me?" She asked.

"I am goeeng to thee recital!" He said heatedly.

"Good." She said, smiling a little. She started to say something else but was interrupted by the sound of a car horn outside. Ady scowled. "Idiot," she said under her breath. "See you in two days," she added to Gru before heading towards the door.

After she left Gru moved to the kitchen and went to a calendar hanging up by the wall. It had a picture of a large machine with a bio symbol on it. Gru eyed it briefly before carefully clipping the ticket over the square for Saturday. There was nothing that would make him miss this recital. The notion of not showing up was unthinkable. He shoved his hands in his pockets and headed for the stairs.

XXX

Gru woke up early the next morning. This was not because he particularly wished to, but rather because Kyle had crawled through the hole still in his wall and was chewing on his foot. He groaned and after kicking the creature away, hoisted himself out of bed. He was sore all over and his face felt as if someone had been sleeping on top of it.

He headed to the bathroom in order to take a quick shower, hoping that it would work out some of the pains in his hip and back and shin. It did seem to help a little, but he was forced to keep the temperature relatively cool so as not to irritate the burns he'd gotten from the mushroom soup. Afterwards, he wrapped himself in a towel and regarded his face in the mirror.

There was a large bump on the bridge of his nose, giving it even more of an awkward shape then was already the case and an unpleasant purplish color had spread to both eyes, making the deep circles stand out. He sighed and got dressed and headed towards the stairs.

When he got to the kitchen he noted, as he looked towards the window that the day seemed fairly overcast. It would most likely rain later. He grabbed the can of coffee from one of the cabinets and pulled out his coffeemaker/espresso machine, yawning hugely and then wincing. After pouring a generous amount in the filter he set it to brew then sat down while he waited. In the meantime the girls had woken up and headed downstairs as well.

"Woah, your face looks bad."

"Thank you Edith." He said as she crawled up in the booth across from him.

"It looks like someone punched you a lot."

"I know." Gru said while looking sideways at Agnes who was struggling to pull herself up beside him. He helped her the rest way up and scooted over slightly so that she could wriggle into a comfortable position.

"Ady said that if you dint put ice on it when it stopped bleeding it'd swell." Agnes said after she was comfortably in place.

"Well…dat…ees not really her business."

"She said your nose is already really big." Gru sighed and tried to massage the bridge of his nose. He hissed and halted in the process. His expression of pain turned to surprise when Margo set a cup of coffee down in front of him which she had poured while her sisters had been talking to him.

"Thank you Margo." He said with a tired smile. She returned his smile and sat down. "So, what do you gurls want for breakfast?" He asked.

"Ooh can we have dead guy pancakes!" Edith asked excitedly. Gru smiled.

"Yes you can 'ave dead guy pancakes." He said as he stood up and grabbed his apron.

Gru whipped up the batter, taking sips from his coffee as did and occasionally looking over at the girls when they talked or attempted to get his attention. He was about halfway into making pancakes and they were browning on the pan when the doorbell rang. He raised his eyebrows. Behind him, Margo slid off of the chair. Gru met her gaze and shrugged.

Margo moved down the hallway, past her father's strange decorations and the living room and the venus flytrap which lazily picked a fly out of the air. When she arrived at the door she pulled at it, opening it a crack and then recoiling as her eyes met black silk and a variety of furs. Then she looked up into Polina's black eyes. As usual, Doug was standing behind the woman, in this case blocking out the daylight.

"Good morning." Polina smiled in an entirely unpleasant manner. "I want to speak wiz Gru. Plez go fetch him little girl."

Margo's initial look of trepidation dissolved into angry suspicion. Gru probably would have recognized this look. It was the countenance she reserved for anyone who might pose a threat to her family.

"He's busy." She said, while crossing her arms. Polina raised her perfectly plucked eyebrows and placed the ebony cigarette holder in her lips with malicious elegance.

"I am certain zat whatever et ez he iz doing can be easily set aside."

"I don't think so." Margo replied. Part of her was aware that she was being stupid, but this part was being overruled by her hatred for the woman in front of her. Polina continued to smile.

"You know…" She said after a few moments, in which all she did was suck on her cigarette with a thoughtful expression. "En a week or so your fazzer will be very very beesy. Zere will be many things from zis…sad existence zat he will 'ave to leave behind. Et would be…very unfortunate if you and your sisters were to be one of zese things. Very unfortunate indeed…but such ez life." Margo narrowed her eyes.

"Margo, who ees at thee door?" Gru asked while nudging open the double doors into the hall. When he saw Polina he froze and for a moment a panicked expression crossed his face. He crossed over to them, moving between Margo and the woman as well as carefully nudging his daughter towards the kitchen.

"Go to thee keetchen Margo, your breakfast ees ready."

"But…"

"Go on, do not let eet geet cold." Margo hesitated, and then slowly moved towards the kitchen, her eyes still on Polina.

"I am certain I told Dr Nefario to call and tell you dat we will be working een de lab today."

"Yes, due to a weapons malfunction." She smiled. "You seem to 'ave taken quite a beating." She said while running her finger down the bridge of his nose in a way that was both painful and, he felt exceptionally inappropriate. "Ze problem ez zat I do not 'ave a lot ove time. Zat ez an interesting wardrobe choice. Do you always dress like zat when working en ze lab?" Polina said while indicating Gru's apron. He looked down at it before untying the string with a hint of embarrassment.

"I was een thee meedle of making breakfast."

"You are quite finished now?" He nodded.

"En zat case, perhaps you would not mind if we did some work."

"Uh…here…I mean…you are stayeeng?" He started, frowning slightly.

"I thought I'd stop by and move sings a long a little. Offer a pair ove hands." She added while motioning to Doug. "And, while I am here, we can go over ze plans for stealing ze Whirl Maker."

"Ah well…I'll…just…put thees een thee keetchen den…I will…open thee lift for you so dat you can get started." He added.

"I thought you weren't working today." Margo said with her arms crossed once Gru returned to the kitchen. Beside her, Edith had her chin in both palms and was gazing ahead in aggravation.

"Well…thees was unplanned." Gru said as he scooped the pancakes onto plates and set them in from of the girls.

"Can't you just ask her to leave?" Margo continued, her voice taking on slightly pleading tones.

"No I cannot ask hor to leave," he replied.

"So what are we supposed to do?" Edith asked while eying her pancake with little excitement.

"You gurls weel just 'ave to entertain yourselves for a leetle while." He said while storing his apron and heading towards the lab.

"Dad…" Margo started. Gru halted and gave Margo a questioning look. "Could you…I mean…can I talk to you really quick?"

"What, what ees eet?" She eyed her sisters briefly.

"Um…in private?"

"I am a leetle beesy, ees eet ove great eemportance?"

"Well it uh…kind of…"

"Can eet wait until thees afternoon?"

"I guess…" Margo said with a sigh. He hesitated for a moment and then nodded.

"All right den. I weel try to geet done orly gurls. Behave yourselves." He added before disappearing through the doors.

Margo sank into her chair and stared at her pancake. Her sisters seemed to be in relatively similar moods. After a moment she sat up and rested her head in her palm, nudging the screw on her glasses in the process. There was a faint beeping sound. Margo scowled. She had been accidentally setting the glasses off continuously since she'd got them back.

After a moment she pressed the other screw watching as her pancake became magnified tenfold, and then began switching through the various functions. There was something that looked like night vision, infra read, a miniature target appeared, supposedly the tazer, she continued flipping through until she returned to the binoculars and eyed her sisters. Edith and Agnes were picking at their breakfast morosely. Margo frowned and after turning the glasses off, slid down off of the seat.

"Where are you going?" Edith asked.

"I don't trust that woman…I'm going down to the lab to see what her and dad are doing." Edith slipped down off of the chair and crawled underneath the table.

"Hey, I wanna come too." She said as Margo headed towards the hall.

"Wait for me!" Agnes said while desperately scooting to the edge of the seat and squirming down to the ground.

"You guys stay here…" Margo said, while stopping at the Rhino Chair. "It might be dangerous."

"Well, you're not going by yourself. Besides, what are we supposed to do while you're down there?" Edith said. Margo hesitated, and then shrugged. If she told Edith not to come, she would most likely follow her down anyways.

"Okay, but we need to stay together." She pressed the button to activate the lift and took Agnes hand.

They made the trip down silently. It had been a while since they'd been down in the lab and even longer since they'd done it without permission. When the lift settled at the bottom, the girls looked around, to ensure that Gru was not nearby and then hopped off.

"Okay, we need to find dad without…"

"Yay sono nanoko!" Margo was interrupted as one of the minions tottered over and wrapped its tiny arms around Agnes who laughed.

A second minion ran up and attempted to hug Edith who put her hand out to deter him.

"Hey quit it."

"Anata bakudan sai sei bombas? Boom!" The first minion asked while releasing the younger girl and lifting a rocket launcher to his shoulder.

"Uh hey Kevin…no…um, actually we're looking for my dad."

"Ohh…okay, Boss! Hey!" The minion started shouting and waving his arms.

"No, no." Margo said desperately while grabbing the minion and clamping her hand over its mouth. "Look, we're not supposed to be down here…this is like…a secret okay. We're spying on him." She said while letting go of Kevin.

"Ohhh supai, shh."

"Right…so…you know where he is?"

"Ta, se sa sala de Jumbotron." Kevin said while motioning to his right.

"Great, thanks." Margo said while heading in that direction.

"What did he say?" Edith asked, following her.

"I don't know, but he pointed in this direction." It occurred to her after a few moments that the two minions were following them. She halted.

"Uhh, what are you doing?"

"Supai big boss." Kevin said. Margo and Edith exchanged a look and then Margo shrugged.

They passed hundreds of other minions on their way. Margo wondered vaguely if any of them would tell her father that they were there. For the most part they just waved or followed them for a while. They reached a large opening in the massive cave like room, which housed the Jumbotron. On the stage area Margo could make out her father's figure as well as the figure of the dark woman, her henchman and Dr. Nefario who was sitting on his scooter.

Kevin tugged on Margo's sleeve.

"Kono yo nee." He said while gesturing to a doorway. Margo and the girls followed him. The path was on an incline. Here and there minions were standing around or doing some sort of vague task of which the logic was not readily apparent. Finally they came to an opening that looked down over the entirety of the massive room.

"Supai." Kevin said.

"Wow thanks."

Margo sat down cross-legged and pressed the screw on her eyeglasses. Beside her, her sisters also sat down. Edith raised her hat a little and squinted down at the stage and Agnes pursed her lips and took on a serious expression.

"I can't see anything." Edith said.

Margo's glasses had focused in too close and she was eyeing the gloved finger of the scary lady. She pulled it back a little until she could see the woman entirely. She was smiling. Margo scowled and moved her head slightly so she could see her dad.

"Look, it's the big tv." Edith said. Margo lowered her glasses a little. The jumbotron was descending. After a moment the screen flashed on, revealing some strange machine surrounded by a lot of complicated figures and writing.

"What's that?" Agnes asked while scooting up to Margo and grabbing her arm.

"I don't know." Margo replied as she raised her glasses again. Dr. Nefario was saying something down below. She tapped her glasses again. There was a long squeak of the sort one might get from a radio signal or microphone then Dr. Nefario's voice echoed in the small space. Margo winced and held her glasses away from her face a little. She'd discovered that there was a microphone in the glasses a day or so prior when she'd accidentally set it off in the girl's bedroom and amplified Agnes' unicorn song.

"_-was able to locate the facility you were talking about," _the doctor was saying. _"And get pretty accurate-of the floor plan and security systems." _

"Woah…how did you do that?" Edith asked.

"Uncle Nefario added some stuff to my glasses when he repaired them." She replied.

"Cool…can I try them."

"Not now Edith, shh!"

XXX

"Zis ez very impressive. 'ave you figured out how to get past some of the higher level security?" I understand zat et ez quite heavy."

"Eet should not pose a problem, we 'ave broken eento our fair share ove high security facilities een thee past." Gru responded. She was making him uneasy. She seemed to insist on standing uncomfortably close to him, close enough so that her fur coat occasionally brushed against his chin and she was touching him a lot on the arm and shoulder.

"Very good. We will plan to do et en ze next couple ove days, tomorrow, possibly Sunday. Zen we will have a week to get et on ze moon before et grows large, and everything will be set en motion."

"A week? Dat ees…a little orly eesn't eet..?" Polina took a brief puff of smoke and regarded him for a moment.

"You are 'aving cold feet, Gru?"

"No…I am…just wondering eef we are fully prepared."Gru replied. She smiled and moved from his side so that she was facing him and ran her gloved fingers over his coat. Gru craned his head back slightly to avoid her cigarette smoke.

"Zis I 'ave been prepared for for years. As long as we stick to ze plan, eet will not fail and, I 'ave to admit, despite a few rough moments I am very eempressed wiz your work. All zat ez left ez zat we really must work on your priorities." She said, her smile broadening, perhaps because of his discomfort.

"Priorities?"

"I need you completely focused on ze task at hand…no weaknesses, no distractions." Her fingers were on his shoulders now."Do you understand?"

"Uhh." He started.

"Just think, in a week men and women will cower at your feet. Can you picture such a thing? I can."

She moved her hands up to the base of his chin and before he could react pulled him towards her.

XXX

From the girl's vantage point, high up in the rafters it was difficult to establish Gru's reaction but the girls' expressions mirrored one another and were largely of disgust. Edith's was the least candid in that she wore an open mouthed grimace and her eye was flinching slightly.

"Ugghhh." Kevin said beside them. He leaned on the rocket launcher, still in his possession and accidentally fingered the trigger. The girls watched, almost in slow motion as the rocket sprang forward, looping slightly and making complicated patterns in the air before hitting jumbotron head on and exploding. "Oops."

XXX

Gru had not been in many relationships. Villainy didn't really offer a lot of opportunities for it. Most villains, if they dated or married did so with partners, assistants or henchmen. In his career he'd not had a partner and there was really no question of dating his assistant or henchmen. Regardless of his inexperience, it was an awful kiss. Polina's dark lipstick tasted of tar, her nails had been digging in his chin, her breath tasted of expensive cigarettes and he was practically choking on her perfume.

When the rocket hit the jumbotron Gru's first mental response was along the lines of; 'Oh, thank god, a distraction.' This quickly dissolved as he picked himself off of the floor and stared wide eyed at the sparks still falling from the massive television. He growled and turned towards the direction from where the projectile took off, outlined by the wisps of smoke still hanging in the air.

"Hey! Who deed dat? Dave, eef dat was you again I swear I weel send you back to packaging!"

"It came from the rafters." Nefario said as he hoisted himself up and straightened his scooter. Meanwhile Polina also picked herself up, blew a stray strand of ebony hair out of her black eyes and put a gloved hand on her trim waist.

"Et ez a wonder you are not repairing zis lab every day." She said with some animosity as she watched Gru head towards the direction of the rafters.

"Oh parts of it are constantly under repair." Nefario responded.

"Some would say zis ez poor organization. Why not just get rid ove some of zem?"

"Well…you see, we kee making more to help with the repairs…it takes a lot of manpower you know."

"Zet are good at ze repairs?" She asked doubtfully.

"Well…mostly they just cause more trouble but…actually when you say it like that it doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Hmm." Polina rolled her eyes.

XXX

"Come on." Margo said while grabbing Edith and Agnes' arms and pulling them towards the exit.

"He was kissing her!" Edith said. "That was so disgusting." It said something for Edith's distaste in this matter that she was dwelling on it instead of the explosion, which in normal circumstances would have impressed the girl to no end.

"I know, we need to get out of here though, we can't let dad catch us…" Margo stopped short, causing Edith to trip and Agnes to bump into her from behind. She stopped because her father was standing in their way. His aggravated expression melted into surprise. Edith looked up, raising her hat slightly.

"We didn't do it."

XXX

Gru walked his daughters back to the living room. The two minions who had accompanied the girls followed them up.

"But we didn't do anything!" Edith said, crossing her arms after her father had lifted her up and carried her to the hall.

"Thee jumbotron blew up!"

"That wasn't our fault." Margo said. Behind him Kevin raised his eyes to the ceiling and whistled innocently. Gru glared at him briefly before turning back to his daughters.

"Eet makes no difference. How many times 'ave I told you to stay out ove thee lab." Gru said while turning to look at Margo, who returned his gaze defiantly.

"Well what are we supposed to do while you're down there?" Margo asked. Edith crossed her arms and glared at him from under her hat.

"Eet does not matter, as long as you stay up here." He said.

"Why, so you can go be with that crazy lady?" Edith mumbled. Gru frowned.

"What I do een thee lab ees not your concern. Eet ees very dangerous and I do not want to see you dere again unless I am weeth you." He said before stepping back onto the elevator. "Kevin, Phil, watch dem, keep dem out ove trouble." He said to the minions before the blue partition closed and the lift descended once more.

XXX

A few minutes later the girls headed outside and sat down on the steps downward from the front door.

"This is all your fault Margo." Edith said, her chin in her palm.

"My fault?"

"Yeah, all of that stuff about not wanting dad to lose his job." She replied. Margo frowned and then stared at the grass for a while.

"Just because we saw him kissing her…doesn't mean anything." Margo said finally. She was thinking about what the woman had said to her before, about leaving stuff behind. "I'm sure when this is over things will go back to how they were." She added, wondering if she was trying to convince her sister or if she was trying to convince herself.

"Or maybe he just got tired of us and he likes her better." Edith replied.

"Nuh uh, he likes us…right Margo?" Agnes said while hugging her arm.

"He's not tired of us, Agnes. Cut it out Edith." Margo said while wondering whether it would be worse if the woman were a threat to her father or a threat to their family. He could probably take care of himself, but if he did like her…how long would they last?

"Why? He sent us back to the orphanage once. What's stopping him from doing it again." Edith said, almost picking up on Margo's own thoughts.

"That…won't happen …" Margo said after a while, trying to sound confident.

"How do you know?"

"Edith." She said. The front door opened and for a moment all three girls spun around guiltily. They had expected their father. Instead, Kevin and Phil were there. Kevin was standing on Phil's shoulders so that he could reach the knob. He jumped down.

They had found the styling head in the girl's room and Phil had removed the doll's hair and had placed it over his own head. Meanwhile, Kevin had taken most of the barrettes out of the plastic bag and had clipped them to the tiny strands of hair sprouting out of his yellow scalp.

"Muneca." Kevin said before hopping down a few steps. He grabbed Edith's arm and the girl shook him off. He frowned and then looked at Phil and shrugged. Phil returned his shrug and sat down on the steps, running his fingers through the doll hair.

"Tago?" Kevin asked while indicating the yard and running in place.

"I think he's asking if we want to play tag." Margo said. In truth she didn'tmuch feel like doing anything.

"Tag's boring." Edith said. "Let's go to the park or something." She added as she stood and headed into the yard.

"Ooh koen. Swings!" Kevin said, following the girl. Phil jumped up and tottered after them.

"Wait we can't just…leave." Margo started.

"Why not, dad put them in charge of us." Edith said while pointing to Phil and Kevin. Kevin was spinning around and saying 'swings' over and over and Phil was flipping the doll hair and batting his eyelashes.

"I don't think…they count as adults."

"So, we used to walk to the park all the time by ourselves." She said before heading towards the street.

Margo frowned and eyed the front door briefly before taking Agnes' hand.

"Come on. We can't let her go by herself." She said.

"Are we going to get in trouble for this?" Agnes asked after they caught up to Edith and the minions.

"I don't know." Margo replied.

"Who cares?" Edith said.

"I know your upset Edith, but things are different now…we can't just walk around by ourselves…besides…it looks like it's going to rain."

"Dad won't notice. He's too busy." Edith pulled her hat down and moved a little ahead of her sister. Margo was silent for a few moments.

"I guess we could go to the park for a little while." She said quietly.

XXX

When they got to the park there was no question that rain was on its way. The sky had darkened considerably and the few people who had decided to risk the weather despite the gloomy sky were packing up before they got soaked.

This was lost on the minions who eyed the park with wide enthusiastic eyes before running past the fence towards the swings and other attractions and incidentally, scaring of anyone that had not already run off. There was a slow roar of thunder in the distance.

"Uhh, guys." Margo started as Edith followed Kevin and Phil. She frowned and exchanged a look with Agnes. The girl's enormous eyes were reflecting the child's universal terror of thunderstorms.

A few drops began to fall and Margo looked around till she saw the small building that housed the restrooms and the vending machines.

"If it starts to rain hard we can take shelter over there." She said in gentle tones while pulling Agnes in the direction of the tire swing where Edith was sitting and spinning listlessly, watching as the chains twisted and then untwisted.

"Would daddy really send us back to the orphanage?" Agnes asked after a while as her and Margo took up a position near the swing.

"No, he said he wouldn't." Margo answered while eyeing Edith.

"He's broken promises before." The girl said.

Kevin and Phil had been playing on one of the slides, climbing up and then hitting each other off of the side. After missing the slide entirely and falling heavily on the ground, Phil picked himself up, adjusted his wig and then walked over to Edith.

"Cara kao?" he asked while leaning to get a better look at Edith's expression and then mimicking her frown with exaggeration. Edith scowled and turned so that she was facing away from him. He straightened and looked up at the chains.

"Supin?" He asked before grabbing the chains and then digging his feet in the ground.

"Ooh." Kevin said before jumping up on the swing next to Edith.

A moment later the tire swing was spinning wildly, fast enough so that Edith and Kevin were a blur. When it finally came to a stop Edith blinked.

"Woah…cool." She said, her anger momentarily forgotten. Kevin jumped off, tottered briefly then cast a sly glance at Edith, winked at Phil and then hit her on the shoulder.

"Tago!" he said before running off. Edith shook her head rigorously then untangled herself from the tire swing, falling over briefly before scrambling to her feet and chasing after Kevin.

"Hey!" Margo started when Edith ran past her, nearly knocking her down. The younger girl seemed to ignore this. "Be careful!" She shouted after her.

Kevin paused briefly to look behind him. When he saw Edith approaching at speed he shouted and headed for the swing set. He jumped over one of the rubber belts, getting caught briefly and then came to the fence separating the park from the rest of the city, which he climbed. When Edith got to it she stopped for a moment before climbing over it her self, landing heavily on the other side before picking herself back up and continuing in her pursuit.

"Edith, wait!" Margo said before hurrying after her, pulling Agnes behind.

Instead of climbing the fence she found the gate and unlatched it. It opened up onto a small strip of grass at the edge of the Parking lot of a neighboring office building. When Margo caught up with Edith she grabbed her arm to halt the girl.

"We've never been down this way before." She said. Edith looked around and then shrugged.

"Ooh, bolos." Kevin said, getting both of their attention. He was pointing excitedly to a building visible across the street with a neon sign, the game of tag forgotten.

"Come on, the park's right there. We can still see it." Edith said as Kevin grabbed her wrist and pulled her in that direction. Phil appeared by Margo's shoulder and grinned at her.

XXX

After cleaning up the wreckage caused by the explosion of the jumbotron Polina and Gru moved to a diffeent part of the lab where they could sit and discuss the heist. Doug laid out a bunch of papers with grids of the government building and the Whirl Maker on it.

"Zere are men here, here and here and I believe zat zese doors are locked and very heavy."

"We could always go through thee wall." Gru said.

"Not a bad idea, but Ze Whirl Maker ez en ze center of ze building."

"Why not just go through thee top ove thee building?"

"I would prefer to keep a lower profile." Polina said. "Ze locks on zese type ove doors are tricky to figure out but not impossible."

Gru sighed and excused himself from the conversation to check on the girls. This was also, in large part because she insisted on constantly resting her gloved hand on his knee.

He sighed heavily as he headed back up to the house and headed towards the kitchen where he pulled a bottle of aspirin from a drawer before noticing the uneaten pancakes still on the table. Gru frowned and after tipping a couple of aspirins in his mouth headed towards the spiral staircase.

"Hey, gurls-" he started as he opened the door to the girls bedroom, only to find that there was no one there. Gru lingered for a moment before shutting the door again and heading down the hall to his own bedroom, checking each of the doors on the way as he did; the bathroom, a closet, the small den with the bookcases.

By the time he got back downstairs again he was beginning to feel the grip of panic.

XXX

After going to a bowling alley, the minions dragged them to other interesting looking buildings; a dress shop, an arcade, a toy store, a café, none of which they entered. Mostly they just stared at the windows before getting excited about another building across the street and moving towards it until they finally wound up in front of a small grocery store, which had got the minions attention because of the weathered and peeling coin operated ride out front. Somehow Kevin managed to get some quarters out of a nearby parking meter, particularly unfortunate for whoever had been parked there and was riding it with every sign of enjoyment.

"All right, we've been walking around in the rain for a half an hour. It's time to go back." Margo said. Margo had given Agnes her jacket so the girl could use it as an umbrella. Fortunately it had only gotten up to a heavy sprinkle and the real storm hadn't started yet. Occasionally thunder would rumble nearby and the younger girl would burry her face in Margo's sleeve.

"Fine." Edith said bitterly. She had been jumping in puddles. She stopped and crossed her arms.

"Come on you guys." Margo said while pulling on Phil's arm.

"Aww." Kevin said, but slipped off of the ride anyways. Margo wrapped her arm around Agnes' shoulders and started towards the street. She paused and as she looked up at the street signs, a glimmer of fear welled up inside her. The grocery store was on the corner of an intersection. She eyed the different streets and then turned and looked down a nearby sidewalk.

"Wait…we came from…that way right?"

"No, I think we came from over there." Edith said while lifting her hat and pointing.

"Are you sure?" Edith shrugged.

"Na, sono manera." Kevin said while pointing down a different street. Margo looked at Phil who, on the spot, pointed towards the grocery store.

"Are we lost?" Agnes asked, wide eyed.

"No…it's okay…I'm pretty sure we came from that road…if…things don't look familiar we'll just turn around and come back…and try a different way." Margo said while tugging on Agnes' hand and heading in that direction.

After about twenty minutes of walking in the rain, which had picked up considerably and a brief argument as to where the grocery store was, they went from possibly lost to definitely lost. When this became apparent Phil burst into tears and started running around in circles.

They wound up at a Chinese restaurant with a faded sign on the corner of a street called Pony Trek Rd. There was a row of payphones on the side of the building. Margo headed towards them and eyed one uncertainly. Kevin handed her three quarters, all which remained of what he'd gotten from the meter.

"Are we gonna die?" Agnes asked as she eyed Kevin, who was patting Phil on the shoulder consolably.

"We're not going to die. Does anyone know dad's number?" Margo asked after slipping one of the quarters into the slot and pulling the handset from the receiver.

"Ooh, ooh!" Kevin said while raising his hand before pulling Phil over to the phone to climb on top of him and punching the silver buttons. Margo held the handset up to her ear. There was a faint ringing from the other end. After a moment Margo frowned and set the phone back into the cradle.

"I don't think that was dad…he sounded like he was speaking chinese." She said.

"Oh okay, Mantenga en." He said while grabbing the second quarter from Margo and putting it in the machine. He punched in a different set of numbers while humming and holding the handset to his ear.

"Big boss, Anata no okāsan wa minikui?" He paused for a moment.

"Is it him?" Agnes asked.

"Da, Kanojo wa buta no yō ni narimasu." Whoever was on the other line started shouting. After a moment Kevin held the phone away from his ear and carefully placed it back in the cradle.

"You don't really know his number do you?" Margo asked.

"Nah." He said sheepishly. Margo sighed and pulled a battered looking phonebook out from a small shelf beneath the payphone.

"Maybe our number is in the phonebook." She said as she sat on a bench nearby, shielding the slightly moldy pages from the falling rain as she flipped through them. Agnes sat next to her and rested her head on Margo's arm. Edith also sat down and pulled her knees up in order to rest her arms on them.

"I don't see it." Margo said, after checking the Gs twice. She wasn't particularly surprised. She doubted her father would wish to be listed in the phone book.

"Now what?" Edith said bitterly.

"This wouldn't have happened if you would have just listened to me." Margo said. Edith scowled at her.

"You're not my mom, Margo." She said before pulling her hat down and folding herself up even more. There was a silence that was filled up by the rain. After a moment Agnes raised her head.

"We could try calling Ady." She said.

"Why would she care?" Edith said, her voice slightly muffled.

"It's worth a try." Margo looked back down at the phonebook and moved from the G's to the O's. Owens, as a last name took up almost a whole page. When narrowed down to just the A's she was able to at least get it down to twenty phone numbers.

"Aaron, Abby, Abraham, Adamina, Adeline, Anna…" She stopped with a frown.

"Maybe she's not in there either." Agnes said quietly.

"Or Ady's a nickname…maybe it's one of these." She said while setting her finger over Adamina and Adeline. "This address looks sort of familiar…I think I recognize that street name and her apartment was really close to one of the neighborhoods we used to walk down to sell cookies." She said with a hint of doubt before looking up at her sisters. Agnes was just staring at her wide eyed and Edith had her own eyes buried under the brim of her cap. Margo shrugged. "We can't just sit here." She said before putting their last quarter in the coin slot and dialing the number beside Adamina Owens' name.

XXX

Ady was sitting on the couch in her apartment with her feet up on the coffee table. Beside her, Dillion was sitting in a way that made it so he took up the rest of the couch and occasionally she had to push his socked feet away from her face. They were watching a really old and exceptionally cheesy horror movie on tv.

Ady had spent much of her day off watching a marathon of wretched films. Normally she enjoyed that sort of thing but the day had, admittedly been fairly dull. Probably because the last couple of weeks had been eventful.

"I'm kind of wondering how that guy with all of the tentacles on his face got past the doorman…I mean, I doubt he could've disguised himself." Ady said as she grabbed at the bowl of popcorn on Dillion's legs.

"The doorman's an idiot…why else would he take a job in a hotel that looks like that." Dillion swung his legs off of the couch, nearly kicking Ady in the ear in the process and stood up.

"Beer?"

"Yeah okay. Don't run into the closet, you stupid woman…" She added as she sat back against the couch and sighed. She heard a crash of thunder and looked towards the windows briefly as behind her the phone started ringing. She vaguely heard Dillion pick it up.

"Hello…uh huh…who's asking…yeah, well I don't know anyone named Margo." Ady blinked and looked over the back of the couch.

"Dillion, who are you talking to?"

"Some kid asking for you, want me to hang up?" He asked.

"No!" Ady said as she set the popcorn aside and grabbed the phone from him.

"Hello?" She said.

"Uh hey, Ady?"

"Yeah…Margo?" She eyed the caller ID briefly. "Are you calling from a payphone?"

"Uh huh…um we're kind of lost…"

"Lost…what are you talking about?"

"We're outside a Chinese restaurant called The Little Pearl."

"You're…" Ady looked up as another peel of thunder rumbled across the sky. "What!

XXX

The Chinese restaurant was not that far of a drive from Ady's apartment. She parked on the curb and pushed open the door, pulling her hood up to shield herself from the rain as she headed towards the building.

"Are you insane?" She asked as Margo stood from the bench and helped Agnes down. "How in god's name did you get here?"

"Um…well we were at the park…"

"By yourselves?"

"Well…not exactly…Kevin and Phil were with us. Edith and Kevin were playing tag and they climbed the fence…and then they wanted to look at a couple of stores…uh…" Margo stopped talking; mainly because of the look Ady was giving her.

"Okay…wait, where's your dad and who are Kevin and Phil?" She said finally as she unzipped her sweater and shrugged it off her shoulders. "Here." She added as she handed her sweater to Margo. "Not that it'll do you whole lot of good now, you guys are already soaked."

"Dad's working." Margo responded a little shyly as she took it and wrapped it around her shoulders like a blanket and pulled the hood up.

"They're watching us." Agnes said while pointing toward a car parked in one of the narrow parking spots in front of the restaurant. Phil had pulled the mirror back to look at himself. Kevin prodded him in the shoulder to get his attention then put his face up against the car window and blew, clouding up the window before drawing a smiley.

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me." Ady said under her breath. "Look, you really shouldn't walk around by yourselves."

"What's the big deal? We've done it before." Edith said from the bench.

"You're like…seven." Ady said.

"So."

"So it's pouring and something could have happened to you. Come on." She added as she motioned for Edith to stand up. She slid off of the bench, regarding Ady briefly from under her hat.

There was a loud crack of thunder and Agnes buried her face in Ady's leg. She picked the girl up and then motioned for Margo to precede her to the car.

"Uh…could you give them a ride too?" Margo said while indicating the minions. Ady eyed them briefly. Phil had joined Kevin in blowing on the windows and drawing.

"Leaving them here would probably cause some kind of panic…so I kinda don't have a choice." She said.

She unlocked the car and sat behind the wheel after ensuring that everyone was seated and buckled in. Margo and Agnes were in the back with the two minions and Edith was sitting in the front seat. Ady started the car and turned the heat on full blast.

"Um the heaters kind of slow but it should warm up in a little bit." She said. She could hear Agnes' tiny teeth chattering in the back as she leaned against Margo. "This is my boyfriends car so…try not to touch anything…I have no idea where it's been." There was a vague crack and she looked in the rearview mirror in time to see Kevin splitting a CD in half.

"Hey! What did I just say!" She said, turning around in her seat. Kevin tucked the broken pieces in his pocket and tried to look innocent. Ady scowled and then turned back towards the road.

XXX

When they got back to Gru's house Ady opened the back door so that Margo, Agnes and the minions could get out. Edith stayed put.

"Come on, kid." Ady said as she unbuckled the girl's seat belt.

"No, she's still in there." Edith said. Ady raised her eyebrow and looked at Margo.

"Polina's here." Margo offered as an explanation.

"What? That lady with the ugly coat." Margo nodded. "Well you can't just stay in the car." Ady said while motioning for her to get out. She eyed Ady for a moment then slumped down in the chair further. Ady narrowed her eyes and grabbed the girl's hat.

"Hey! Quit doing that!" She said as she reached for it. The woman grabbed her around her waist and lifted her out of the car, hoisting her up and shutting the car door. Edith stopped struggling after Ady set her down and handed her her hat.

"Let's go, I'm getting soaked." Ady said as she took Edith's hand and pulled her towards the house. Edith was wearing a gloomy expression but did not resist. Margo, Agnes and the minions followed.

"I wonder if daddy noticed if we were gone." Agnes said.

When they got to the door Ady raised her hand to knock and then jumped slightly when the door swung open. Gru halted, his expression of alarm twisting into surprise, confusion and then settling into relief.

XXX

He'd been searching through the house for the last hour. He'd checked all of the rooms twice and had returned to the lab to see if they'd perhaps snuck back down there. After being informed that this was not the case by the minions working near the lift, he sent them around to look everywhere anyways and had gone to check the front yard and the back yard, before heading back into the house and checking everything again. He even found himself checking places where they could not possibly have been. He was just about to go out and drive around in the tank when Ady and the girls arrived.

His first reaction was to pull the girls into a hug. After that and after some of the panic dissipated his brain started working correctly again and making connections and also to register Ady's presence. He broke away from the girls and pulled them inside.

"Where 'ave you been?" He asked angrily. He also noted that his shirt was wet. "And why…are you so wet? How long 'ave you been out dere?" The girl's remained silent. Margo massaged her arm, feeling slightly ashamed.

"We went to the park." She said finally.

"You went…you can't…" Gru started. "Do you 'ave any idea…I've spent thee last hour looking all over de house! What are you doing here!" He added while shouting at Ady, who was leaning against the wall.

"They called me from a pay phone outside The Lucky Pearl." Ady said

"What?"

"It's a Chinese restaurant."

"We got lost and we didn't know your number." Margo said.

"Are we in trouble?" Agnes added.

"Yes. You are een trouble." Gru said. "Now go upstairs and change those clothes and we will deescuss eet lator."

"Sorry." Margo said as her and the girls headed towards the stairs.

He vaguely heard the sound of the lift in the living room and sighed. A moment later Dr. Nefario appeared, eye'd Gru and Ady and then frowned and looked back into the living room nervously.

"Polina's been waiting down in the lab, Gru. What is she doing here?"

"She ees just bringeeng thee gurls back."

"Hey!" Ady said, getting Gru's attention. She was addressing one of the minions as they tottered past her. He was carrying a Cd case. She grabbed it from him. "That is not yours!" She turned towards Gru.

"You know, when I made the arrangement with you to take days off, this sin't exactly what I was thinking. Did you really think it was a good idea to put those guys in charge of your kids?"

"Dey were not een charge. I just told them to keep thee gurls out ove trouble."

"Really…and how do you think that worked out?"

"Look, I was downstairs thee whole time. I deed not expect them to run off like dat."

"Well maybe you should have!"

"Gru…Polina…" Nefario said urgently.

"Een thee circumstances, I think you should tell hor dat she needs to leave." Gru said before addressing Ady again. "I 'ave been down dere loads ove times while dey were up here. Dese has never happened before."

"But Gru…" Nefario started.

"Not now! Just go geet reed ove hor!"

Ady eyed him for a moment then as he turned back to her she flicked him in the nose.

"Agh!" He said. "Why…would you do dat!"

"You deserve to be punched!" She said. There was the soft sound of someone clearing their throat. Polina was standing in the doorway to the living room.

"I was trying to tell you…" Nefario said. "She came up with me." Gru straightened and eyed the woman removing his hand from his nose.

"You allow a mere babysitter to talk to you like zat, Gru?" Polina asked. Ady crossed her arms. Gru exchanged a look with Nefario.

"Uhh…well I…"

"He was just um…" Nefario added before also sputtering into silence. Polina broke away from the doorway and approached Ady and Gru.

"How can you expect to rule ze world if you allow zis…girl to defy you wizout consequence?" She said the word 'girl' like she might say cockroach. Ady glared at her.

"Well…I wouldn't say defy…exactly." Gru said awkwardly as it occurred to him that he was in a situation that regardless of what he did or said would not end well.

Polina pulled her cigarette holder out of her mouth and placed the side not holding the cigarette underneath Ady's chin.

"I sink I should show you ze proper way to deal wiz…" She started. She was interrupted as Ady hit the cigarette holder away, causing it to land on the ground.

"Who the hell do you think you are!" Ady asked. Polina looked momentarily surprised then smiled a little.

"I sink I should be asking zat question. Who are you? When I was your age I already knew exactly what I wanted and was already working towards et. Zat cigarette was worth more zen everysing you are wearing right now." She eyed Ady's clothing, which consisted of ripped jeans and a faded oversized t-shirt, all of which was completely soaked. "Considerably more." She added distastefully. Gru was watching with mounting horror. Ady exchanged a look a with him and he had a sudden horrible image.

_'Oh please don't…' _He thought as he stared at her.

"So you wanted to wear too much makeup and ugly coats or is that your way of saying your old?" Ady said. Gru groaned and before the older woman could react he grabbed Ady around her shoulders and pulled her towards the kitchen.

"All right, dat ees enough." He said as he pulled her through the doorway and then let go. "Are you completely out ove your mind!"

"What? I'm supposed to just let her…"

"Yes! Do not speak to hor! Let me deal weeth Polina!"

"Deal with her? How…you were just standing there!"

"Just because you geet away weeth mouthing off to me does not mean you weel be so lucky weeth hor!"

"I'm not going to let that woman intimidate me."

"Look, dat woman ees very dangerous. I do not want to see you get hort."

Ady's angry expression dissipated and she eyed Gru with some surprise. It took Gru's mind a few seconds to catch up to speed with what he had just said. When it finally did his face colored.

"Just…stay here…don't, don't move…" he sputtered awkwardly before pushing the double doors open and heading back into the hall.

XXX

I swear to god I will get one of these chapters up in less then two weeks one of these days. On the bright side, I think this is the longest chapter I've posted so far so hopefully that makes up for some of the wait and hopefully the chapter does not disappoint.

To those of you without an account:

Polaris: Glad you like it ^^ Thanks you, I intend to. And thanks for the review!

Z of Diamonds: I am glad that it did not disappoint ^^ and I'm glad you like the story. Thanks for reading! : )

Have a great afternoon everyone!


	16. The Heist

Chapter 15:

The Heist

When Gru got back out into the hallway his face was still flushed. He cursed himself briefly for allowing his tongue to run like that and tried to regain his composure before approaching Polina. The woman had replaced the cigarette in her holder. Her stance reflected her impatience.

"Zat woman has a lot ove nerve." She said while eyeing Gru carefully.

"Uhh, yes, I ave noticed."

"And you intend to allow her to get away wiz it?"

"Er, I weel deal weeth hor…een my own way." Gru said awkwardly. "Sometheeng has come up…een thee circumstances I think it would be best eef you leave." He continued nervously. Polina inhaled cigarette smoke, remaining silent for a few moments before blowing it out.

"And tomorrow? Do you intend to continue to work en your lab?" She said the last part almost mockingly and there was warning in her dark eyes.

"Uhh…dere ees a lot to be done still."

"I want ze Whirl Machine on Sunday. And I sink, zis time you can acquire et wizout my assistance." She said in a silent, dangerous voice.

"Sunday…?"

"Yes… perhaps you can be prepared by zen?" Gru eyed Nefario who shrugged.

"We weel manage, I am sure." Gru said, trying to sound confidant.

"You had better. And Gru…" she said as she placed her gloved fingers beneath his chin. "If any of zis gets en ze way of my plans, I will be very very upset. Do you understand?" Gru nodded, resisting the urge to swallow.

"When you are ready to do ze heist, call zis number." She said while waving her arm vaguely to Doug who moved forward and searched through his coat before producing a card. "It will connect you to a friend of mine who has clearance to fly over ze facility. He will meet you outside ove ze perimeter. You'll ave to parachute en." Gru took the card from Doug. "I will see you on Sunday…wiz ze Whirl Machine." She said this as if to say that not having it was not an option and would result in very…unfortunate circumstances.

"Oh, yes." She started as Nefario opened the front door for her. "You will need ze shrink ray back. I will send it to you tomorrow." Doug preceded her through the door and opened an umbrella for her.

After seeing Polina out Gru returned to the house. Nefario was waiting with a grim expression on his face.

"I hope that in the circumstances you're not going to still insist on taking tomorrow off." He said.

"Uhh…well…I was theenking…maybe we could use eet for…preparation?"

"Gru! We barely have enough time as it is!"

"I know dat…but…I can't leave the girls weeth thee minions again and I'm not going to ask Ady." He added.

"Fine then, _I'll_ tell Miss Owens she has to work."

"How exactly do you plan on doeeng dat?" Gru said. "Thee last time you tried to tell hor to do sometheeng eet deed not really turn out all dat well. And I 'ave to put my foot down weeth dat gravity gun."

"This time will be different…I really shouldn't have used something still in testing. Ooh, I have an idea. Hold on."

"Hey wait, what are you…" Gru sighed heavily as Dr. Nefario headed towards the lift.

"Dees ees unbelievable, why ees dees happening to me?" He muttered as he walked down the hall towards the kitchen. He hesitated at the door, his hand half raised to the knob and for a moment experienced a very unpleasant jolt in his stomach. Damn Nefario! If the man had never said anything in the first place, he would not be in this position. He could have gone on thinking that he hated her. Gru scowled, pushed these thoughts from his head and took a deep breath before shoving one side of the door open.

Ady was sitting in the booth against the wall with her chin in her palm. She had been caught off guard by the fact that Gru had shown any sort of concern over her well being and it was enough to at least keep her from leaving the kitchen, but by the time he returned she'd regained most of her composure.

"Told her off did you?" She asked, not raising her head.

"Dat ees not business of yours," he replied.

"Is that a no?" She asked as she looked up at him.

"Dr. Nefario has gone down to de lab to geet sometheeng to persuade you to babyseet tomorrow." He said, ignoring her question. "You should probably go before one ove us ees crippled," he added. He sounded tired and perhaps a little cautious, choosing each word carefully as if he were afraid he would say something else to suggest he might have human emotions.

"So what, that's it?" Ady asked as Gru turned back towards the door.

"Yes, thank you for bringeeng de gurls back." He said the last as the door closed behind him. Ady stood up and stared at the door for a moment before sighing and moving toward the hall. She paused briefly to eye the stairway and then the living room, which was still raised to accommodate the lift and then crossed her arms against the expected chill as she headed back out in rain.

XXX

Gru walked down the upper hall to the girl's bedroom glumly. The girls had changed and Margo was gathering up the wet clothes when Gru pushed the door open.

They looked at him with some guilt. This was particularly true of Agnes who regarded him with wide-eyed shame.

"What are you doeeng weeth those?" he asked while nodding to Margo.

"I was going to take them down to the dryer." Margo replied.

"I will take dem." He said as he took the bundle from her.

"Um…I need to give Ady her sweatshirt back too," she added as she indicated the green hoodie she'd draped over one arm.

"She has left already." Gru said while indicating for her to pass it over to him. "She will 'ave to take eet back when she comes on Sunday."

"She left?" Margo asked. "Oh, I guess she didn't want to spend any time here on her day off." Margo said with a hint of disappointment.

"Is that other woman gone?" Edith asked bitterly. She had refused to relinquish her hat to Margo despite how soaked it was.

"She ees gone too." He said.

"Are you mad at us daddy?" Agnes asked from his feet.

"I am a leetle, yes." He replied. For a moment it looked like she were going to burst into tears.

"Are you going to send us back to the orphanage?" Gru frowned.

"What? No. Why would I do dat?" Her lower lip had begun to quiver. Gru's expression softened and he leaned down, setting the wet clothes aside so Agnes could wrap her arms around his neck. "I would never send you back dere." He said, hugging her back. "But I was very worried. You 'ave to promise me dat you will not do anytheeng like dat again," he said while looking up at Margo and Edith as well. Margo nodded. Edith mumbled something as a way of agreement.

"Now come on. I will fix something for deener. I am sure you gurls are hungry since you deed not eat your breakfast." He said.

When they headed downstairs Nefario was standing in the hallway with a beaker in his hand.

"Where's Miss Owens."

"She left." Gru said as he ushered the girls into the kitchen and then headed for the laundry room with the wet clothes.

"What? Well did you at least get her to agree to come in tomorrow?"

"No. Ees dat de anti gravity serum?" Gru asked pausing in the act of loading the clothes into the dryer.

"Yes, I figured it would pretty much have the same effect as the zero point energy gun without the hazard of picking up the wrong subject."

"Have you got eet so dat eet ees temporary now?"

"Well…no…" Gru paused at Ady's sweatshirt and eyed it briefly before throwing it in the dryer too. He straightened and gave Dr. Nefario a dour look.

"So how ees she supposed to babyseet eef she ees floating around de ceiling?"

"Well…she could still watch them…just…from above."

"No." Gru said as he passed him. "How were you even goeeng to geet her to drink it?"

"Well…I…um…hmm." Gru rolled his eyes.

"Forget eet. Just go down to de lab. I will be down lator and we can start preparing for de heist."

"What about tomorrow?"

"We will just 'ave to make do weeth de time we 'ave."

XXX

Gru And Dr. Nefario spent the better part of the night going over the floor plan of the top-secret facility where the whirl maker was being kept.

"All right, so the facility is in the middle of the desert and the government owns all of the property around it. They have camera's all around the building, so we'll have to be discreet." Nefario said. The map was spread out on the table between him and Gru.

"I miss thee days when we could fly up and burn a hole een thee wall." Gru said sulkily while readjusting his positioning order to try and stay awake.

"Yes well, Miss de Molyneaux wants us to go in unnoticed. There are guards outside the facility but I think they're just civilians hired by local law enforcement agencies. Then there are the sensors buried all over the property."

"You don't theenk thee government will notice a giant weapon ees meesing?"

"Well I'm sure they will, but this way they won't know who took it."

"How do we avoid de sensors?" Gru said while rubbing at his eyes.

"I think I can whip up something to cause a minor interference…long enough for you to sneak past them. According to the map, this is the building where it's being kept. If you take this route," he said while tracing along a path with his finger. "You'll come across camera's here, here and here and there are guards here and here. Then there's most likely a keypad to get inside. Of course there will be cameras on the weapon and possibly sound detection…Gru are you absolutely certain you can do this by Sunday?"

"We don't really 'ave a choice." Gru said with a yawn.

XXX

The next day went by in a haze and Gru spent most of it going over the floor plan for the facility, as well as studying the various list of security devices surrounding the weapon and how he was going to get past them.

He spent much of the day sitting in the living room with the map spread out over his legs. Somewhere below him Nefario was working on something to use on the security sensors, as well as making sure all of the equipment Gru would use the next morning was in working order.

Gru's eyes scanned the page, drifting over various passages and tiny lettering. Occasionally he found himself dozing off and had to snap himself back into awareness.

After the girls woke up he took a break to get them breakfast and again in the afternoon for lunch and Nefario occasionally came up from the lab with examples of weapons and devices that might help and showed them to Gru and explained how they worked.

At some point Doug stopped by, looking rather out of place when he was outside of the dark frightening woman's shadow and dropped off the shrink ray.

The girls themselves spent the majority of the day trying to entertain themselves. Edth was still sulking and although Margo was also unhappy she made an attempt to keep her sisters from bothering their father. She was only successful for so long, however and eventually Edith insisted on approaching him. Margo and Agnes followed because there really wasn't much else to do.

"What are you looking at?" Edith asked as she approached the couch and pulled one side of the map down so she could see.

"Please do not touch dat." He said as he pulled it from her gently. "I am…familiarizing myself weeth a place I need to go tomorrow."

"Why?"

"So dat I will not get lost or…something." He said substituting the word 'something' instead of saying 'caught' or 'shot at.'

"Can you play with us when you're done?"

"Thees may take a leetle while. But maybe eef I feenish orly." Edith gave Margo a dark look before crossing her arms and heading out of the living room.

"Hey Agnes, why don't you put on your tutu and we'll practice the dance steps for Saturday." Margo said.

"Okay, you're coming to the dance recital on Saturday, right daddy?" Agnes asked while grabbing at Gru's knees. He looked up into her giant brown eyes and gave her a tired smile.

"Ove course I am comeeng, Agnes." He said. She smiled and then hurried out of the room to get her tutu.

Gru pulled up one side of the map and began shifting through the various pages underneath.

"Dad?" He looked up. Margo was still standing there with her hands folded, looking slightly awkward. "Can I talk to you? Um, I didn't get a chance to yesterday."

"Uh,…I…'ave a few minutes." He said while straightening slightly. Margo shifted uncomfortably.

"I heard you can uncle Nefario talking about that exploding cookie…the other day…is…I mean…is that woman trying to hurt you?" The last bit came out in a rush. Gru looked mildly surprised, and then his expression softened a little.

"You heard dat?" Margo nodded. He hesitated for a moment and then folded up the map and the papers and set them aside, motioning for Margo to sit next to him. She did so. "She…ees not tryeeng to hort me…" He explained carefully, while secretly questioning the truth of the statement. "Dat was…a meesunderstanding…eet malfunctioned."

"Are you sure?" She asked.

"Yes. You know how Dr. Nefario's equipment ees."

"I guess so," she said, clearly not entirely convinced. "She's kind of scary," She said. Settling for this instead of expressing her full dislike for the woman.

"I will not let anytheeng happen to you gurls, I promise." He said, seeing the doubt in her expression.

"What about you?" Margo asked quietly.

"I will be fine. I can take care ove myself." He said. Margo nodded after a moment and slipped off of the couch.

"I don't trust her, dad." She said, pausing in the doorway.

"Well…you deedn't trust me either." Gru said. He'd said this to put her at ease and did not mean for it to sound as if he were defending Polina in any way, but this is how Margo took it. She frowned and headed towards the stairs.

XXX

In her estate Polina was standing on the platform overlooking the glass prison where the kidnapped men were being kept and was smoking silently. Doug moved up beside her when she'd smoked the cigarette to the filter and offered an ashtray.

"Did you return ze shrink ray to Gru?" She asked as he loaded her cigarette older again and lit it. He nodded briefly. "And zat ozzer sing?…did you find a way to sneak et en as well?" Doug nodded again and left to empty the ashtray. "Good, I want to keep an eye on zat woman." She said as he went, her black eyes on the President of France who was sitting and holding his legs. After a moment Polina approached the control panel Gru and Nefario had built for the mass atomizer and opened the plate over the keypad. She picked up the sheet on top that had the password written across it and then pressed a few of the buttons. There was a long beep and then after pausing for a moment she punched something in.

The day before when she'd been in Gru's lab she'd made sure to look at the plans for the control panel, paying close attention to how one might go about changing the password.

XXX

Early the next morning Gru set out to the place where he was told to meet Polina's friend, whom he had phoned a few hours prior. The location was at a small raised patch of land near the secret facility.

The man was wearing an air force uniform, but his face and the outfit didn't quite match. He had really sharp and dodgy eyes and his cheeks looked as if there were a network of craters across them. He also had a mound of blond hair that was slicked back against his skull. Gru hesitated after he exited the tank because he recognized the man from the banquet him and Polina had attended a week or so prior.

"Eet ees Henrick, right? Aren't you de German Prime ministers assistant or sometheeng?" The airforce uniform he was wearing had a nametag on it that said Roger, which explained why the sleeves of the coat and the pants appeared to be too short.

"Shall we?" Henrick said while indicating a plane and ignoring his initial question. Henrick had been fairly silent at the banquet but the few times he had spoken, he'd had a very thick German accent. It did not seem to be present now.

"Do you know how to fly dis?" Gru asked as he climbed up into the passenger seat. Henrick gave him a brief sunless smile before buckling himself in and getting to work on starting the plane.

"All right, I am going to fly over the area surrounding the fence. When we get about a mile away you'll have to parachute down and go the rest way on foot." Henrick explained as he flipped a couple of switches. Gru, meanwhile was trying to figure out how to buckle himself in.

He had fastened a belt around his shoulder and waist which carried a couple of bombs, two of the devices Nefario had made the night before to interfere with the sensors, his goggles, a grappling hook and one or two other items he might need. Nefario had also fashioned a strap so that Gru could carry the shrink ray on his back, but he had a feeling the thing would still be a major burden. The seatbelt in the plane refused to stretch to encompass all of this and it was hard to imagine how he would add a parachute as well. After a while Gru just gave up and resolved to just hold onto something on the inside of the plane.

"You have your work cut out for you." Henrick said after they'd taken off and were in the air. "It's nearly impossible to get into this facility without clearance." Gru scowled at him and shifted in his seat in hopes that this would deter the man from speaking to him further. He hadn't slept much for two nights straight and was trying to focus on all of the things he had to remember to get through the building and to the room where the Whirl Machine was being kept. He was also trying to focus on not being thrown out of the plane and was therefore not in the mood for conversation.

"Some people are able to get in…they don't get back out again of course. If you manage this I am sure Polina de Molyneaux will be very impressed."

"Great." Gru said bitterly.

"I would put your parachute on." The man added, while handing the item over. Gru took it from him carefully and began the arduous task of struggling into it.

"All right, we're in the perimeter. If you succeed, Polina has instructed me to tell you to bring The Whirl Machine to her estate afterwards. Good luck." He added the last in amused tones as he opened Gru's door.

XXX

When Ady arrived at Gru's house, he had already left and Margo had let her in. Nefario was sitting in the living room with an ancient looking laptop open and some strange wires coming from an earpiece he was wearing. When she walked in he was banging on the machine and muttering under his breath. Ady gave Margo a questioning look and the girl shrugged.

"He said he's helping dad with something today."

"Ah. All right then…I don't want to know." She said as she followed Margo down the hall.

"So, are you guys in trouble?"

"Kind of. Dad said we couldn't leave the house for a while, apart from like…dance class and stuff." She said as she pushed the door open to the kitchen. Edith and Agnes were sitting in the booth finishing breakfast. Agnes slid off of her seat and hugged Ady's leg.

"Yay, you're here."

"Uh yeah…" She said, blinking. "So, we're stuck in your house today?"

"Yeah, and the rain finally stopped." Margo said. It had been fairly gray the day before as well. Today it was still very wet outside but the sun was out and the sky was clear.

"I like the rain. There's puddles…and mud." Edith said.

"You can't even go outside?" Ady asked. Margo shrugged.

After cleaning up the dishes and after the girls got dressed Ady opened the front door for the girls and then headed down the steps after they moved past her into the yard. She sat down on the bottom step and pressed down on the grass experimentally with her foot.

"Well this might have been a mistake." She said as the grass made a squelching noise under her shoe. She looked up and could already see that Edith was working on becoming really filthy. "Yup."

Margo sat down next to her with a sigh and watched as Edith gathered up a bunch of mud and Agnes skipped around with her unicorn toy clutched tightly in her arms.

"Um, thanks for picking us up the other night…" Margo said shyly, getting Ady's attention.

"Well I wasn't going to leave you at a Chinese restaurant in the rain," she said. "Did you really think walking around by yourselves like that was a good idea?"

"We _did_ used to do it a lot when we lived at Miss Hatties." Margo said.

"You shouldn't have been allowed to then. Did that woman come back yesterday?"

"No, but that creepy guy did and dad was still really busy." Margo looked up at the woman after a moment. She was still watching her sisters with a kind of lethargic expression. "I really hate that woman."

"Yeah well from what I've seen of her I don't like her much either." Ady replied as she met the younger girls gaze.

"I'm worried about my dad." Margo said quietly. Ady frowned, aware that she'd somehow found herself in a personal conversation without realizing it.

"Uhh…have you mentioned this to him?" She asked a little awkwardly.

"Yeah, he said he wouldn't let her hurt us and he could take care of himself. Even Agnes doesn't like her…and Agnes likes everyone." Margo said while resting her chin in her palm.

"I don't know that any of this is really…any of my business Margo." Ady said carefully.

"Oh, right…yeah, sorry." She said a little glumly while turning her gaze away. Ady watched her for a moment, feeling as if she should say something else and not sure what it was. These thoughts were interrupted when Agnes approached them.

"Look, I picked you some flowers." Agnes said while handing over a fist full of weeds. Ady looked at them for a moment before carefully accepting them.

"Wow…thanks."

"Some of them are kind of prickly," Agnes added cheerfully.

"I noticed…they're uh…great." She said smiling awkwardly as the girl beamed and skipped off again.

"I'll go pick you some more." She said excitedly.

"Kind of surprised weeds even grow in your guys' yard." Ady said while setting them down carefully and massaging her fingers a little where the thistles had stung. Meanwhile Edith had walked up with a hand full of mud, which she dropped at Ady's feet, splashing her shoes and pants.

"Agh! Hey! What are you doing?" Ady said while raising her foot slightly.

"I made you a mud pie…it's got lots of grass and worms in it," she added the last as if it this were cause to rejoice. Ady looked sideways at Margo who was giving her a slightly amused smile.

"Ugh…awesome." Ady said while brushing the mud off of her pants. "Thank you." Edith smiled in her slightly indolent way.

Over the next couple of hours Ady acquired a bouquet of weeds and enough mud pies to make a cake. Margo looked on with amusement for a little while, and then when Agnes started to get little cuts from the weeds, she went to help the girl pick out weeds that didn't include nettles.

"All right. I think it's about time for lunch or something." Ady said in part to discourage the girls from bringing her anything else.

"Aww, I don't want to go inside." Edith said while dropping one more handful of mud on what looked like a little mud mountain.

"Can we eat outside?" Margo asked. The other girls looked up at Ady hopefully.

"I don't know…this yard is almost a health hazard."

"We could bring out a blanket…then it could be like a picnic." Margo said. Ady turned her head to the side and then shrugged.

"All right." She conceded. "But before we eat anything anywhere, you guys need to wash your hands." Ady said as she climbed the stairs and opened the door.

"Aww, why?" Edith asked. Ady eyed her mud caked hands.

"Humor me." She said as they headed inside.

"Aren't you going to bring your flowers?" Agnes asked.

"Oh yeah." Ady said, almost depressedly as she grabbed up the weeds.

"What about your mud pies?" Edith added as Ady closed the door behind her.

"I think those are good where they are."

The woman halted at the door into the living room while the girls ran off to wash there hands, mostly because Nefario was talking rather loudly, one gloved finger in his ear and one holding a mouthpiece up to his lips.

"All right, give me a moment while I go over the floor plan again. There has to be another way out of there. I suppose in retrospect I should have considered a bulletproof vest. Is there something you can take cover behind?" He caught Ady's gaze and cleared his throat. "Give me a few minutes, I'm going to head back down to the lab," he said while giving Ady a dark look. "Strictly speaking this isn't your business Miss Owens. All right, all right you don't need to shout," he added, speaking once more into the mouthpiece. Ady frowned and then headed down the hall.

XXX

Even a mile was a long walk with the shrink ray strapped to his back. After he'd jumped from the plane Gru pulled a small earpiece from his pocket and fixed it in his ear then tapped it a couple times. He winced as it squeaked.

"I 'ave landed." He said as he shed the parachute and readjusted the shrink ray slightly. He eyed the desert. He could see the fence into the facility from there, given that there wasn't much in the way of landscape in between him and it. Just sand, lots and lots of sand.

"Good." Nefario replied, his voice slightly tinny in Gru's ear. "I've determined your current position, and if I'm correct you're about three hundred yards away from the first sensor."

"You're sure." There was a burst of static in his ear causing him to wince again and the silence. He scowled and then proceeded forward, counting in his head. When he got to about the right place he unzipped his coat and removed one of the small devices from his belt. There was a small rod protruding from the bottom, which he stuck in the sand, and then he pressed a button on top. There was a brief buzzing sound. He frowned, wondering if this meant that it had worked or if it meant that it was a dud. He sighed and headed on anyways.

After the sensors, which he passed without apparent difficulty he came to the wall. He removed the grappling hook from his side and threw it up toward the fence. It caught at the top and Gru began climbing, grunting slightly as he attempted to carry his own weight as well as the shrink ray's.

He struggled over the top and half jumped and half fell to the ground on the other side after briefly making sure that no one had seen the grappling hook take hold. If it hadn't been for the fact that he had fallen into the middle of a highly secure area he might have laid there for a moment or two in order to catch his breath. Instead he struggled to his feet with a groan, his knees cracking in the process and took cover behind some crates near the fence.

Gru scanned the area carefully, trying to pick out the route he'd memorized on the map and keep an eye on the men walking around. They were mostly in uniform and there were enough of them that it was unlikely that Gru would be able to get past them unnoticed.

He crouched down as a security guard drove by in a jeep. Another man walked by towing something on wheels with a lot of damaged machinery on it. He was whistling. Gru grinned as an idea presented itself and as soon as the man's back was turned to him Gru knocked him out cleanly and dragged the unconscious body behind the crate. He struggled out of his coat while keeping his gaze somewhat fixed on what was going on around him. The man had been fairly heavyset so Gru was able to slip the man's pants on over his own and he pulled what was essentially a button up camo jacket over his turtleneck and the belt storing his weaponry. He also donned the man's hat, pulling it down over his eyes.

He stashed his jacket and the shrink ray under the chewed tarp on the cart the man had been pushing and after casting a brief look from right to left pushed it forward towards one of the buildings. Another jeep drove by and the driver seemed to pay him little attention.

A camera atop one of the side walls was rotating slowly. Gru ducked his head when the camera passed over him and then when it moved away again he picked up his pace.

He ran into three other cameras on his way to what, according to the map was the door into the building where the Whirl Machine was being kept. Sure enough, as Nefario had said, there was a keypad next to the door. Gru halted by it, pulling the cart up to the wall. When it was clear that there was no one around, he pulled his goggles over his eyes and removed a small laser from his belt. He carefully held it level to one side of the keypad and pressed a button, sending a red beam out and tracing on the outside of the plastic casing. When he was finished he released the button and held the small laser in his teeth as he removed a screwdriver and another unknown tool from his belt. After taking the cover off of the keypad he eyed the insides briefly, which were a network of circuits and screws.

Gru tapped the earpiece a couple of times just in case, but only got more static. He made a hissing noise through his teeth before spitting out the laser and readjusting the lens on his goggles so that he could peer more closely at the machinery. After casting another look over his shoulder he moved the screwdriver to a screw at the bottom of the keypad and carefully removed it before switching to the other tool. Which let off a small spark in the now vacant space. To Gru's relief there was a heavy thud as the doors unlocked and slid open. He slipped into the building, pulling the cart behind him and pulling his goggles down around his neck.

"Hey, are you dere?" He whispered as he tapped the earpiece again. There was another burst of static. He could see a few people in uniforms on the far end of the room behind a glass partition and was therefore trying to speak without moving his lips very much.

"Sorry, this thing is so blasting old." Nefario returned.

"I am eenside de building."

"Oh good, any trouble?"

"Notheeng so far."

"Okay, well there should be an elevator on the left wall. The weapon is about five floors down."

"All right." Gru said as he pushed the cart towards the elevator, trying to look as if he belonged there. One of the men, who was holding a cup of coffee, looked up briefly and for a moment looked slightly puzzled. He said something to the man beside him and straightened. Gru frowned and hit the button on the elevator quickly, slipping in the sliding doors just as the man started towards him.

"Hey! Hold on!" Gru heard as the doors shut again. He sighed. Getting back out again might be a problem. When he got to the desire floor the doors creaked open and after pushing the cart out Gru stood where he was for a moment as he eyed the massive room. In the center was the whirl machine. It was hooked up to a series of wires, some as thick as Gru's arm. Gru stared too long, and did not notice the man in uniform approaching him.

"Hey, this is not a testing day, no one's supposed to be down here." The man said, before pausing and taking a second more informed look at Gru. The man opened his mouth a little and then darted towards the far side of the room to pull the alarm. Gru pulled the tarp off of the shrink ray and his jacket and untangled the freeze ray from an inner pocket in his coat, pulling the trigger when the man was about five feet away from the button and freezing him in place.

He shoved the freeze ray in his belt clumsily before hoisting the shrink ray in its place and eyeing the whirl machine. Finally after taking a deep break he pulled the trigger and watched as the massive beam hit the thing straight on and it began to reduce in size. As it did the wires sprung loose, for a moment hissing and writhing like snakes and the world went red. Gru stared up at the walls wide eyed as the red lights flashed and an ear splitting alarm started going off, only tearing his eyes away when he heard the doors in the room lock.

"Oh…no…" He said.

"What is it? What happened?" Nefario asked.

"De alarm ees going off!" Gru shouted back, above the din as he threw his jacket over his shoulder and still towing the shrink ray ran forward to grab the whirl machine as it clattered to the floor, now no bigger then his fist.

"Well then, get out of there, did you get the whirl machine?"

"Yes, I got eet, but de doors are locked and de elevator has been shut down, how do I geet out?" He said as he pressed the button on the elevator repeatedly. He heard a brief humming noise and looked up in time to see part of the wall sliding down and for a moment was looking into a gun barrel before it sprang to life. Gru shouted and hoisted the shrink ray up as a shield. He was thrown off of his feet and out of one of his shoes as a bullet hit it. The Shrink ray went off once, hitting the cart and then buzzed as few sparks crackled off of it. The cart was reduced in size. When it hit the ground it glided off into the corner like a roller skate.

"Gru, what's going on?"

"I am being shot at!" Gru replied while scrambling to his feet and moving desperately behind a control panel for cover.

"All right all…a few minutes to check…plan again." Dr. Nefario's voice drifted in his ear, interrupted by bursts of static. "I suppose…bullet proof vest…anything you can take cover behind?"

"I am takeeng cover! I need to geet out ove here!" Gru shouted back. He heard the humming sound again and watched, almost wearily as another partition in the wall slid down across from him.

"Oh…you have got to be keeding me…" He said. Gru pulled the freeze ray out of his belt again and pulled the trigger before the gun was visible. The wall froze, half lowered.

"A few minutes…head back down to the lab…none of your business Miss Owens."

"Hey! I do not have time for you to be doeeng dat!"

"All right…don't need to shout." Gru frowned as the link between him and Nefario went silent. After taking a deep breath, he broke cover and ran as fast as he could towards the gun turret on the far wall, which rotated slowly towards him. When he judged himself close enough he raised the freeze ray and fired. The gun made a few jerking noises and fired again. There was enough power so that it fired through the ice, but fortunately he'd stopped it at least from moving. He added another layer just in case and headed back towards the elevator as the gun continued to shoot spasmodically at the far wall.

Gru looked around him desperately. The ice would only hold for so long. He needed to find a way out. He eyed the elevator door and picked up the shrink ray, which made a worrying zzzz sound. He hoisted it up and fired at the door, it sputtered, released a short burst and the doors groaned a little. Gru hit the side of the ray and was relieved when it let out another quick burst before dying. The doors made a terrible sound as they were ripped from their hold and fell out slowly. Gru kicked off his remaining shoe and walked into the elevator, eyeing the lifeless buttons before looking up towards the trap door at the top. He unshouldered his jacket and pulled it over his shoulders, storing the freeze ray and the whirl machine as well as strapping the shrink ray once more to his back before unloosing the grappling hook.

A few minutes later he was making his very slow ascent up the elevator shaft. At about the halfway point he stopped, panting, his shoulders on fire. He undid the strap on his belt and watched, reluctantly as the shrink ray slipped off and clattered down the elevator shoot, making a racket on the way down and landing heavily on top of the still elevator.

When the sound died down Gru started climbing again with a little more ease now that some of the weight was lifted. It took him a while to get up to the elevator door to the ground level of the building. When he got there he paused in order to consider how he was going to get it open. Not for long, however because there was a whoosh indicating the power in the elevator had come back on, and to his dismay, the elevator itself began to rise. Gru frowned and watched as the machine rose, barring his teeth slightly and looking up to judge how much room he would have if the elevator came all the way to the top. Not enough.

Gru continued to watch the elevator with dismay as it moved past the door below him, then, when it was about five feet away from the bottom of his socked feet he wrenched the grappling hook free and dropped on top of the rising platform. He quickly went to work on the trap door, which was already unlatched from the first time and dropped into the car before he could be crushed by it. Unfortunately the man who had pressed the button was standing in front of the elevator along with a group of others. There was a brief expression of confusion on the face of the man in front, as he tried to work out why the car had no door and why a man in uniform had dropped in towing a rope with a hook on it.

"What the hell?" The man started.

Gru had landed more or less on his feet, stumbling slightly in part because he wasn't wearing shoes and in part because his knee locked when he landed. He took advantage of the uniformed men's' few seconds of confusion and yanked the freeze ray out of his belt pulling the trigger successively, freezing the men in his way before pushing past them.

Another unlucky man was heading in the doorway to the building as Gru ran towards it.

"What's going on, alarms are going off and the key pad is…" He only got that far before he was encased in ice.

At this point Gru was beyond worrying about being discreet. He knew running was probably a bad idea. A person running away from the commotion was cause for suspicion, but he was more concerned with getting out as soon as possible. When he got close enough to the wall he swung the hook around and flung it at the top. He was vaguely aware of some sort of uproar behind him and ignored it as he climbed up the rope and landed on the other side.

He continued to run until he couldn't hear anything from the facility any longer. When he finally did stop he did so in a slow collapse and wound up with a mouth full of sand. There was a brief burst of static in his ear.

"Gru, I'm in the lab and all set up…Gru? You haven't been shot have you?"

"Never mind…Dr. Nefario." Gru wheezed back, his voice, though breathless, still dripping with animosity.

XXX

A few hours later Gru was standing in Polina's living room after Doug ushered him in. The woman was relaxing on her chaise lounge. It was taking all of his willpower to keep from swaying on his feet.

"Well, do you 'ave it?' She asked. Gru dug in his coat for a moment before removing the whirl maker. Her black eyes glittered and she extended her gloved hand. He approached her bitterly and placed it on her palm. Polina eyed it for a moment almost hungrily.

"How foolish ove me to doubt you. You are a surprising man" She said. "Zis ez cause for celibration, a glass of wine, perhaps a feast. Or we could find ozzer entertainment." Gru tried not to think about what Polina considered other entertainment to be.

"Uhh, Dr. Nefario requires my assistance at home." He lied. Polina unfolded herself from the couch and rose, putting her arms around his neck.

"I am sure he will be fine wizout you."

"No, he was very particular about eet." Gru said while stumbling backwards, much to Polina's annoyance. "I will just…see myself out."

Gru headed home feeling exhausted and frustrated, paying even less attention to the traffic on the road the usual. When he drove up to the house he saw Ady and the girls in the front yard. Margo had found a large blanket to cover the muddy wreck that was Gru's lawn and they had made sandwiches because they were easy to prepare and were not likely to burn and Ady had taken some tea bags and had put them in a pitcher to seep.

He parked in the driveway and shed the camouflage he had still been wearing before stepping out onto the lawn, wincing slightly as mud oozed over his socks.

"Daddy." Agnes said while waving at him.

"What ees thees?" he asked tiredly as he approached them. He was trying to ignore Ady, who was regarding him with her pensive green eyes.

"We're eating lunch." The little girl said cheerfully.

"On de lawn?" he asked while eyed the small pits of mud around the blanket.

"Uh huh, do you want to eat with us?" Margo asked. Her sisters probably didn't notice, but she could see the exhaustion on her father's face. He looked like he was practically swaying on his feet.

"Uhh…I do not theenk so." He said.

"Aw come on," Edith said while standing and grabbing his hand. He started to protest and then gave in, because it was easier that way. He allowed Edith to pull him down on the blanket next to her and Ady. Margo smiled and handed him a sandwich. Gru accepted it without comment and took a bite. He hadn't been fully aware of how hungry he was until that moment.

"You know you're not wearing shoes…right?" Ady asked. He gave her a weary look.

"I am aware." He said heavily. Margo had returned Ady's sweater but she had set it aside and her shoulders were bare again, showing all of the freckles on her shoulders and chest. He shifted uncomfortably.

"Just making sure." She said as she picked up the pitcher from beside her and filled a cup, which she handed to him. He eyed it briefly before taking it.

"Ees thees my tea?" He asked.

"Uh huh."

"You took high quality imported Hawaiian Oolong and threw eet een a pitcher and made iced tea?" He said dryly.

"Sun tea." Ady said as she took a bite out of a sandwich.

"What?"

"It's sun tea, dad." Margo said. It had actually been her idea. She'd suggested it to Ady while they were trying to figure out what to drink.

"But dere ees ice een eet."

"Yeah but it's made in the sun."

"What ees de differ…" He was interrupted because Ady had removed a sandwich from the plate and carefully shoved it in his mouth while he was talking. He gave her a slightly surprised and exasperated look.

"My mom used to make it." Margo said a little awkwardly. Gru bit down on the sandwich and swallowed. "Ah well, de tea made from de sun ees very good, Margo." He said after a moment and with some unease. She smiled at him a little. He looked sideways at Ady who was laughing softly. When she met his gaze he tried to take no notice of the way his stomach somersaulted.

"What?" he said with some irritation, his face coloring slightly.

"_Tea made from de sun_." Ady repeated with some amusement. He scowled and then sighed heavily.

After they finished eating Agnes offered to pick Gru flowers like she had for Ady and bounced off to the side of the yard.

"Stay away from the prickly ones Agnes." Margo called after her. Meanwhile Gru removed his coat and readjusted his position so that he could lie on his back.

Edith leaned on his chest and rested her chin on her arms, regarding him solemnly.

"You smell funny." She said after a moment, when Gru raised his gaze to her.

"Thank you." He said with a yawn.

"Like something's burning."

"I will be sure to resolve dat."

"You look tired." Edith added exercising her talent for stating the obvious.

"I am tired."

"Why?"

"Oh Edith, please stop askeeng me questions." He said.

"Come on." Ady said while pulling Edith off of him. "That mud pile by your dad's door could probably use a few more layers." Edith shrugged; she didn't need too much encouragement to play in the mud.

Shortly after Gru drifted off to sleep, only vaguely away of voices outside of his consciousness.

"Don't bother him Agnes." That sounded like Margo.

"Better get everything cleaned up. Think we should leave him on the lawn?" That was Ady. And after that the voices faded.

XXX

"Should we wake him up?" Margo asked as they picked up the last of the picnic stuff.

"I'll get him. Go inside and make sure Edith washes her hands." Ady said.

"You're not going to do anything horrible are you?" Margo asked.

"No promises." Margo gave her a doubtful look but headed towards the doorway anyways. She paused when she got there and eyed Ady as she crouched down by her father and shook his shoulder gently.

"Hey, Gru, wake up." Gru muttered something in a half snore and his eyes flickered open "Didn't catch that." She added while smiling in a thoughtful if not somewhat cynical manner. He blinked and met Ady's gaze before awkwardly hoisting himself up into a sitting position.

"So do you actually sleep, or do you spend your nights thinking up new ways to be insufferable?"

He was too busy trying to struggle to his feet despite the many aches and pains he had acquired during the days venture to have a retort for this. She surprised him by grabbing his arm and assisting him.

"I've got eet." Gru said as Ady bent down to gather up the blanket. He hoisted it onto his shoulder and they headed inside. Although Gru paused briefly to comment on the mud pile by the bottom step.

"It's a mud cake."

"What?"

"I don't know," Ady said. "Edith made it."

XXX

Gru headed up to the girl's room at Agnes' insistence to read to them, exchanging one big Unicorn for something else on the book shelf, because his nose was still tender and he didn't want to make the unicorns horn. The book was about a stuffed rabbit and it was a fairly simple narrative but Gru wasn't really able to follow it in his half asleep state and he interrupted the reading to yawn on occasion.

When he finished the book he kissed the girls goodnight, coming last to Margo who fixed her brown eyes on him.

"Dad?"

"Hmm?"

"You are coming to the dance recital, right?"

"Yes Margo, I promise."

"Even if that woman wants you to do something on Saturday?"

"Notheeng could keep me away." He said earnestly. She smiled as he removed her glasses from the bridge of her nose.

"Can I ask you something?" Margo said.

"What ees eet?" he asked with a yawn.

"Can we invite Ady?" His expression of weariness lifted a little.

"What? Uhh…why?" He asked awkwardly. Margo shrugged a little. "I am not sure dat she would agree…"

"Can we invite her and see?" He was vaguely aware of Edith and Agnes adjusting their positions so that they could hear his response.

"I do not know…eef dat ees a good idea, Margo."

"Why?" She asked.

"Because…we do not…I mean she…and Dr. Nefario…uhh." Margo raised her eyebrow. He sighed.

"All right, you can invite hor." He conceded. Behind him Edith and Agnes relaxed. Gru straightened and headed towards the door. "Dad."

"Yes Margo?" Gru asked while turning towards her again.

"You should probably change your clothes before you go back downstairs. You do smell funny." She said, smiling a little as she turned over in her bed.

XXX

When Gru got to the top of the stairs he stopped and brought his sleeve up so that he could sniff it briefly. He frowned and looked over the banister before heading into his room, shedding his turtleneck, pants and socks before searching through his dresser and pulling out a black turtleneck, dress pants and a new pair of socks.

After he dressed he ducked under the hole in his wall and headed downstairs and into the kitchen. Ady was washing out the pitcher that the sun tea had been in. She looked up at him as he grabbed a mug and searched briefly through what was left of his tea before pushing it away and grabbing a bottle of wine from the rack instead.

"Long day?" Ady asked cynically.

"You 'ave no idea." He said below his breath as he set the bottle down and fished through his cabinet for a wine glass. He gave her a brief sideways look before clearing his throat with some discomfort. "Would you…like a glass?" He asked, surprising her and to a small degree himself as well.

"Uhh, I don't really…drink a lot of wine…I mean…you know outside of the stuff that comes in a box." Ady said, feeling slightly bewildered.

"Dat ees not wine." He said as he opened the cabinet that housed the wine glasses.

"It's not that bad." She said as she took the proffered glass from him.

"Eet ees only not bad, eef you 'ave not had a decent glass ove wine." He said.

He set his own glass down on the counter and then reached for the wine bottle and hesitated. He ran his thumb over his fingers briefly and cast another look at Ady who raised her eyebrow.

"Could you just…excuse me for one second." He said before heading out of the kitchen door.

"Okay…" Ady said.

XXX

The fuzziness in Gru's head had been replaced with a kind of lightheadedness, which he was attributing mostly to his lack of sleep. Although as he activated the lift and headed down into the lab he was also battling with the mass of butterflies in his stomach.

He stepped off of the platform and headed towards the far end of the large room where he kept his wine cellar. He punched in the code and opened the heavy door, eyeing the inside with all of the racks briefly before scanning them. The wine he kept on the rack in his kitchen was mostly for cooking. It was much much cheaper then the wine in his cellar. Although, to be fair, a lot of wine was cheaper then the stuff in his cellar.

His eyes fell treacherously on the bottle of Chateau Margaux.

"Oh…dese ees really stupid…dere ees no way dis can end well." He muttered to himself as he pulled it off of the rack. He also grabbed a couple of the wine glasses hanging above the bottles, because with something like Chateau Margaux, one didn't drink from a regular glass.

He shut the door to the wine cellar behind him looked up, and shouted, nearly dropping the glasses and the wine, because Dr. Nefraio was standing in front of him on his scooter.

"Gru, I was wondering if you had returned." He said as he stepped off of the machine. "Was Miss de Molyneaux pleased?"

"Uhh, yes, she was…very pleased." Gru said while trying not to look guilty.

"So what is our next course of action?" Nefario asked before he eyed the contents of Gru's hands and raised his eyebrow. "Is that your uh…last bottle of 1982 Chateaux Margaux?"

"Yes…" Gru said slowly.

"You're going to open it?"

"I…wanted a drink of good wine…to celebrate…for today's er…success." Gru said while inching his way around Dr. Nefario.

"Why do you have two glasses?"

"Dey are for…eef…one…ees…dirty." He muttered the last as he backed up towards the lift.

"Gru…"

"Leesten," Gru interrupted him. "I will geet back to you…lator and we will talk about…thee next plan…all right? All right." He said, delivering the last while half running towards the lift.

XXX

Ady looked up surprised as Gru set one of the glasses down in front of her and then after fishing through the door for a bottle opener picked the cork off of the Chateau Margaux cleanly.

She continued to watch him in a sort of bewildered silence as he poured a small amount of wine in her glass.

"Did you just…go down there…and get that." She asked. "And you…seriously think I'm going to drink it?" He put his hand down on the table and leaned over her, causing whatever other comment she were about to make to die in her throat.

"Leestin, dese ees a bottle of 1982 Chateau Margaux. Dees ees not a wine you can be torning down."

He straightened and set his own glass on the table across from her. She stared at him for a moment as he poured a bit for himself and took a drink, while giving her a pointed look.

She blinked and then shrugged a little and took a sip.

XXX

Oki, once again, I hope this chapter turned out all right. I realize it's a bit crammed. I really should have put the first bit at the end of the last chapter rather then having it start this one out. Also, I apologize if the Whirl Machine Heist part runs on a bit long.

For those of you who do not have accounts:

Rii: It's okay ^^ Hopefully this chapter has some sufficient fluff.


	17. Freckers and Beaky

Chapter 16:

Freckers and Beaky

It _was_ good wine, although Ady didn't particularly have much experience in the matter. She had never really considered herself a wine sort of person. And in any case, it was a bizarre situation. She wasn't certain how to handle it. Now, if he had been trying to poison her that would have been another matter…she could have probably dealt with that…

Whether it was because he was tired, or because he was having the same difficulty she was having, Gru was being fairly quiet. Occasionally he would acquire a brief, stormy expression before it would dissipate and turn back into weariness.

"It's good." Ady said awkwardly in order to break up what was becoming an extremely uncomfortable silence. "It has a little bit of a licorice-ish taste to it." He gave her a strange look.

"Licorice-ish?" He said after a moment. Ady shrugged. "I 'ave never heard dat term used to describe thees wine."

"What? It tastes a little bit like licorice. I did say that I didn't drink wine."

"Apparently."

"Well what you say about it?" Ady said gloomily. Gru took another sip and for a moment was overtaken by a strong urge to impress her. Which was frankly, ridiculous. After all, given her breadth of knowledge on the matter he probably could have told her just about anything and she wouldn't know the difference.

"Boysenberry, cassis, toasty oak, beeter chocolate, penetrating, dry, but exotic and notes de graphite et de réglisse." She was watching him while he said this with vague amusement. When he came to the last part she had to stop herself from laughing.

"What? What ees eet?" He asked with some annoyance.

"Hmm, French is very disconcerting with your accent." Ady said. He shot her a dark look.

"Oh, this was a meestake." He said in a heavy sigh while slumping slightly in his stool. Across from him Ady set her arms down on the counter and leaned forward slightly.

"In college I took a world literature class with a teacher who didn't let us buy translated novels." She said after a moment. "She started us off with this little young adult novel called 'Amour, Reglisse Et Chocolat.' So we could get the hang of reading in different languages, not that it actually helped much. I can't remember the author's name but let's see…it translated to 'Love, Licorice and Chocolate.' So, does saying licorice in French make it less ridiculous?"

"Not adding ish would 'ave made eet less ridiculous. You speak French?" He said through his vague bewilderment.

"Not really. I can sort of read it. We also read some Russian novels and an Irish novel…in case you were planning on trying that again." She gave him an amused smile that made parts of him tingle. "It sounded good up until then though. What's cassis?"

"Blackcurrants." He said Afterwards the silence came back. Gru was tracing the top of his wine glass with one of his slender fingers and occasionally cast surreptitious looks at Ady who had one of her sweatshirt strings in her mouth and was staring at her own wine with an expression of concentration.

"So, do you like, speak French fluently?" She asked after a moment.

"Yes. I speak seven languages fluently,"

"Ah, does that include English, because if it does we may have to redefine your definition of 'fluently.' What nationality is 'Gru?'"

"I don't know." Gru said in heavy tones.

"For that matter…what nationality is Felonius?" A look of distaste crossed his countenance.

"Dat name, you will not use."

"Are you sure? That doesn't sound like me." Ady said as she spit out her hoodie string. Gru scowled and straightened a little in his seat.

"Fine…" He started. "But eef you do, you will 'ave to then deal weeth thee consequences." As he said this he was aware of some fuzziness in his head. Not drunkenness, because he'd not even had a glass of the wine, but something that was making his head spin in any case.

"Consequences?" Ady asked, looking slightly tired. "What else is there for you to try? I don't see you being able to top the exploding cookie and man, your nose is just starting to change back to its normal color."

"Believe me, dere are many theengs I could do. Een thees case I would probably just start calleeng you Adamina." Ady blinked and then after a moment she gave him a puzzled smile.

"Where…how…do I want to know how you knew that?" She asked.

"When Dr. Nefario looked up your address we used a receipt from one ove those horrible takeout places you ordered from. Your full name was on eet."

"All right. If you don't call me Adamina, I won't call you Felonius." She said as she crossed her arms.

"Deal." He said as he took another sip of the wine.

"Your name is still worse though." Ady said.

"I know…yours ees pretty bad."

"Yeah, I know. One nice thing about it though is that it's hard to rhyme things to. Kids in grade school aren't that smart."

"Dey had no trouble weeth mine." He regretted saying it immediately. This was most certainly not a subject he wished to get into, especially with her. He grabbed the bottle of wine and hoped that she would not pursue it. No such luck.

"Oh yeah? What'd you have?"

"I…am not telling you dat…"

"Are you afraid I'll start using them?" She asked amusedly.

"I would not put eet past you." He said uncomfortably.

"I suppose I could always start guessing…hold on…well I saw the pictures…and you do have a lot to work with." He glowered at her a little.

"You are so…" He started in frustration before sighing. "Mostly, when dey made fun of my name eet was Smellonius or gruesome."

"Those aren't even very good." Ady said.

"Sorry to disappoint you." He said heavily. Ady eyed him for a moment. He was glaring vaguely at the table. She finished the glass of wine and stood from the stool. Then she surprised him by moving to the other side of the counter and sitting next to him, setting her glass down as she did.

"…I had freckles, of course and…spots, um…one kid called me freckers for some reason…and thought that was hilarious…" she added, as he looked up at her. "I used to break his nose a lot…and ah yeah Pippy Longstocking and little Orphan Annie. Oh and once I started going by Ady, I got Ratty Ady or rats nest Ady a lot. Before I started cutting my hair it was…kinda bad..." He grunted.

"Dat ees nothing." He said as he motioned for her to hand him her empty glass and then poured a little more wine in it.

"You can top it?" Ady ask while resting her chin in her palm.

"I 'ad…Gross Gru and Grubby Gru and beaky and Pinocchio and Schnoz and Fat Felonius." He handed her her glass back. "And de people who were not clever enough to make up a nickname used to imitate my accent instead."

"Well the worst nicknames came later on, once kids started thinking that anything vulgar passes as wit. Being a girl with red hair and freckles everywhere…" Ady shook her head. "I used to get into a lot of fights over some of the stuff I got called in Junior High." Gru frowned. When he had gotten older he'd had 'Fruity Felonius' and 'Flaming Felonius.' There was no end to embarrassing f words to put in front of Felonius and those had been the polite ones. He tried to shake those thoughts away.

"Yes well, de names were not de worst part. De worst part was whenever my mother heard one she liked, she would use eet for weeks afterwards." He said gloomily, then after a moment he colored a little; aware that at this point he had probably said a little too much and tried to hide his embarrassment by taking another drink of wine. Not that that was going to help matters. After a while he risked a look up.

"My mom just got mad at me for fighting…she didn't really care about what started it. She was pretty disappointed with me most of the time." She added quietly. Gru nodded wearily. As a child his mother expressed her disappointment in him on numerous occasions…well…she still did. He met Ady's gaze and there was a mutual consensus of cleared throats and shifting eyes as both of them tried to discard some of the more disagreeable childhood memories.

Gru finished his second glass of wine and looked at his empty glass and then at the bottle of Chateau Margaux. There was definitely a warm cloud expanding in his head. The general rule was that you were supposed to stop drinking when you started getting tired. Well, Gru hadn't slept for two days so there was no real indication there. He couldn't feel all of the aches and pains in his body anymore either, which was probably a bad sign.

Beside him, Ady drained her glass. After setting it down she started to shrug off her sweatshirt. He eyed her uneasily. She glanced over at him and raised her eyebrows while giving him a uni shrug as if to say; 'what?'

He stood up carefully, his knees cracking.

"I…am going to geet something to eat." He said. It had been a few hours since the sandwich and apart from that he hadn't had much of anything else to eat all day. The important thing was to get something in his stomach so that he didn't do or say something that he'd wind up regretting in the morning. On the other hand he'd already opened up a bottle of his finest wine with a girl nearly half his age and discussed embarrassing nicknames from his childhood, so perhaps that ship had already sailed. If Nefario were to come upstairs at this point Gru would already have a difficult time explaining the situation. Still he pulled out his apron and opened the fridge.

Ady turned in her stool and put her elbows up on the counter behind her. She regarded him carefully through her own slight haze, watching as he tied the apron at the back and rolled up his sleeves. Then he rested his arm casually on the top of the fridge door and eyed its contents. He looked over his shoulder at her and aware that she had been staring at him, Ady looked away and reached for her phone to look at the time. It was 9:30.

"Well, I should…" she started.

"Are you hungry?" Gru asked casually, interrupting her.

"A little, I guess…" She said. "but it's getting kind of…"

"Crepe?"

"What?" She asked while trying to readjust her thoughts.

"Would you like a crepe?"

"Uhh…okay…what…is a crepe?"

"Eet ees like a pancake dat you fill weeth stuff and wrap up."

"You're making pancakes at 9:30?"

"Dey are _like_ pancakes. I am filling these weeth mushrooms and artichokes and stuff like dat."

"Oh…well that makes it…better." She said as he got the stuff out of fridge and began setting it on the countertop.

"Do you want some help?" Ady asked. She had stood from the stool and had moved to his side, her hands in her back pockets.

"Weeth thee way you cook, no, I would like for dem to be edible." She gave him a brief defiant stare.

"Well, maybe it'd help my cooking if get a pink gingham apron. Where do you even get an apron like that for men?"

"Eet ees not pink, eet ees red…and I think you need more den an apron." He said. Ady raised her eyebrow and then leaned towards him and pulled at the collar of the apron a little to get a better look. As she did her hair brushed up against his chin and he was hit with the scent of what was most certainly some sort of cheap shampoo. A small part of him reasoned that this was not, by anyone's standards an alluring scent and yet, for some inexplicable reason he was resisting the urge to bow his head slightly and breathe it in like perfume. Instead he cleared his throat and leaned his head back a little.

"No…this is definitely pink, sorry." She said, breaking him out of his thoughts.

"Eet was red." He said distantly. "Thee gurls keep throwing dere tutus een thee washer."

"Well, even in red, gingham is something I've really only ever seen in hobbyist stores," she said while rubbing at her face absently. She was getting flushed from the wine. "Where did you learn to cook anyways?"

"I…taught myself," he said. "After I moved out ove my mother's house."

"College?"

"No, I was seventeen, she said eet was soon enough."

When he set the finished crepe in front of her she had to admit that it smelled fantastic. He also emptied the rest of the bottle of Chateau Margaux into their glasses and sat down again.

Ady picked up the fork he had given her and turned up a part of the pancake to look at the filling.

"Are these the artichokes we used on your face?"

"Yes." Gru said as he took a bite of his. Ady raised her eyebrows and took a bite of her own.

"Man," she said after a moment, "I don't even like mushrooms and this is still one of the best things I've ever eaten," He smiled a little.

"You 'ave probably not had them properly made. I don't see how you can enjoy anything you cook."

"The artichokes are good too, I wonder if using them to reduce swelling improves their flavor. The next time you make these you should throw yourself at a wall a couple of times and see," Gru ignored this. For a few minutes they ate in silence. Ady broke it.

"You know your daughter likes mushrooms." Gru considered his daughters, dismissing Edith immediately.

"Margo?"

"Mhmm, on her pizza anyways." She said as she took another bite.

"She never asks for dem."

"She never asks for anything."

"Huh…I will 'ave to remember dat." He said thoughtfully, taking her plate as she finished the last of the crepe.

"You know, your face ees torning very red," he said when he returned. She was rubbing at it again. In it's flushed state her freckles stood out in clusters.

"Yeah, I know, I can feel it." Ady said with a sigh. "It does that when I laugh too hard or when I have too much to drink. I should probably call a cab or something," she added with a yawn before she got up from the stool. Her bag had tangled around the bottom of it. It caught around her ankle. Gru turned around bewilderedly as she fell to the ground.

"You are thees impaired after three glasses?"

"No, I tripped," she said, her voice slightly muffled before she sat up and tried to untangle her foot from the stool. Gru smiled a little, knelt down by her foot and took her by the ankle. He gently pulled her socked foot out of her shoe, and then undid the strap as she pulled her foot back. Gru was about to hand her her shoe back but paused briefly to examine it, turning it over as he did.

"What are you doing?" Ady said cautiously.

"Your feet…are enormous…ow!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, did I accidentally kick you in the side?" She said dryly as she grabbed her shoe from him and struggled to stand. "And you're one to talk, what are you, a size four?" she said.

"I am not a size four." He said with some irritation as he straightened. He was actually a size six and a half narrow, which was not a whole lot better. That was another thing he got made fun of in school…particularly when he got older.

"Yeah well, we can't all have dainty girl feet." Ady said as she attempted to put her shoe back on while still standing, and hopping clumsily. All she managed to do was almost fall over again. In an attempt to avoid it she steadied herself by grabbing Gru's shoulder and instinctively threw out the other hand holding the shoe as well and clocked him in the face with it. He grunted.

"Oh...sh-" She started as he grabbed her wrist still holding the shoe and held it away from him. "I'm sorry." She added, while trying not to laugh.

"You know dees sort of thing happens a lot less when you are not here." He said, his free hand cupping his nose.

"Really? That's hard to believe. Is your nose okay?"

"Yeah," he replied while straightening, suddenly aware that he was still holding her wrist and she still had her hand on his shoulder. It was almost like being in a dance position…except that it would be hard to imagine what sort of dance involved holding one shoe.

"So when you fought een school did you try to beat people to death weeth your shoes?"

Ady opened her mouth, comeback ready, but stopped because she'd met his gaze. He still looked tired and the wine probably did not help this and he still had some blackness under his eyes from his previous nose injury but despite this, there was softness in his expression that she wasn't accustomed to, at least not while he was looking at her and he was smiling in a way that was almost gentle. In any case it took some of his pointyness away.

"No…" She said finally, focusing on his tired blue eyes. "We could try that if you like though," she added weakly.

"I theenk een thees case I will concede." Ady's mouth twitched into a slightly puzzled smile and then this faded as she shook herself mentally.

"Uhh, I should go…call a cab." She said as she carefully removed her hand from his shoulder. He let go of her wrist when it occurred to him that he was still holding it. "Thanks for…the wine and the pancake thing." She ran her hand through her hair in a slightly nervous gesture before moving around him carefully.

When she got to the living room she sat down on the crocodile couch with a long sigh and eyed her shoe briefly before dropping it on the floor and searching through her bag for her phone. She dialed the number for the cab service and rubbed at her face with her free hand while she listened to the phone ring. She'd gone from the slight flush of being slightly drunk to the glowing, ear burning redness of an outright blush and before she was distracted when the cab service finally answered she was trying to convince herself that this was also because of the wine.

XXX

When he woke up the next morning, Gru spent a few minutes just staring at the ceiling. He used this time to try and work out which part of him hurt the most. His legs were certainly aching. Even the bottom of his feet felt as if he'd spent an hour or so scrubbing them with a cheese grater, probably because he'd walked for over an hour on sand and rocks in his socks. There was another pain not associated with muscle ache in his right knee, which felt as if he might have done something to it when he'd tried to jump down into the elevator…it also felt as if it might be a little swollen. His arms hurt too. Although he finally decided that it was his back that was causing him the most discomfort. This was confirmed when he tried to sit up and heard it crack three times.

"Ugh." He groaned and then after breathing in, managed to get out of bed with only mild cursing.

"Oh there you are." Dr. Nefario said as Gru made his way down the stairs, wincing every time he had to bend his knee. "It's getting late. I tried calling you but you didn't answer." Gru grunted in response as he headed into the kitchen, pausing briefly when he saw Ady sitting at the counter with a cup of coffee in front of her, staring vaguely at a newspaper spread out on the counter's surface. His daughter's were sitting at the table eating cereal on the basis that Gru had not been up to fix any kind of breakfast and the only thing Ady knew how to make even vaguely breakfast related was eggs.

Ady caught his eye and straightened.

"Oh, hey, you're awake" she said, "…you look…really really awful." He unfroze and, after making sure that he had in fact remembered to wear his pjs the night before and not just his underwear, headed towards the fridge.

"Er, hello." He said carefully, ignoring Dr. Nefario's unabashed throat clearing behind him. "No, no, no, Agnes please." He added when the girl wriggled down from the table and attempted to attach to his leg. "Today ees not a good day for dat." He added as he bended down slightly and ushered her back towards her breakfast. He grimaced when he straightened out again.

"Morning dad." Margo said.

"Good morning, Margo." He said as he went to the fridge. He opened the door to the freezer and grabbed some ice, putting a few cubes into a towel he'd grabbed from a rack and then, after a moments thought dumping the rest of the tray in as well. Afterwards he sat down at the table next to the girls and set the towel down on his knee.

"What's wrong with your leg?" Margo asked with some concern.

"I…must have slept on it…wrong…or sometheeng,"

"Is it okay?"

"Eet will be fine." He said before meeting Ady's gaze for a moment and then looking away nervously.

"Hey, your secretary is making guttural noises over by the door. He's not having a fit or something is he?" She said after a moment as she took a sip of her coffee. Gru sighed a little.

"Excuse me gurls," he said before heading over to Nefario.

"Miss de Molyneaux contacted us this morning."

"Please do not be telling me dat she ees coming over here." He said as he headed out into the hall.

"Not as far as I know, but if you don't head over there soon, it may occur to her." Gru sighed as Nefario pressed the button to activate the lift.

"I really don't 'ave de energy for dis today…" he said while shaking his head

"Yes, well, I imagine drinking a whole bottle of Chateau Margaux by yourself will take you like that." Nefario said while giving Gru a vaguely inquiring look.

"Eet ees certainly not wine you close up again after eet ees opened." Gru said, pokerfaced. Dr. Nefario watched him for a moment longer before heading back down the lab.

"I have some notes for you to take to Miss de Molyneaux's. Stuff she asked for while she was here. You'll probably want to go get dressed."

When the living room slid back into position Gru sat down on the couch and rolled up the hem of his pant leg. He hissed when he got to his knee and then carefully lowered the towel on the swollen joint.

For a moment he imagined driving down to Polina's manor, being ushered into the lounge or the containment area by Doug, who always walked too closely behind him breathing loudly through his slack jawed tongueless mouth and seeing that woman smiling at him with her black eyes glittering. He groaned slightly.

He looked up from his unsettled thoughts because; apart from the slightly spasmodic activity from his venus flytrap he caught movement out of the corner of his eye. Ady was watching him cautiously. She broke away from the doorway and approached him.

"Slept on it wrong?" She asked in discerning tones while nodding at his swollen knee.

"I am…an active sleeper."

"Do you sleep on a mattress made of concrete?" She asked while raising her eyebrow.

"Eet ees not as bad as eet looks," he said.

"Well that's good…because it looks pretty bad. You know, if you plan on walking on that today, that ice isn't going to do you a bit of good," she said as she stuffed her hands in her pockets.

"Eet will be fine." Gru said as he carefully as he rolled his pan leg back down and stood from the couch, groaning slightly and then clearing his throat to hide it before he moved past her and headed towards the stairs which he took even slower going back up. He had never felt so…old in his life. He didn't like it.

When he got to his room he began searching for something to wear. He settled for the usual and after dressing carefully and with much more effort then should have been the case, headed into the bathroom to examine himself in the mirror. At least his nose had gotten pretty much back to normal and the darkness under his eyes had returned to its normal shade.

"Are you going to work today dad?" Margo asked from the door, startling him slightly.

"Yes."

"Even though your leg is hurt?"

"Eet ees not dat bad." He responded as he headed out the door, trying to not to limp.

"Why don't you…just stay home today? You can go to work tomorrow." Margo said, following him.

"I cannot do dat, Margo. I just got done taking two days off."

"Yeah, but you worked the whole time."

"Well, dere ees a lot to be done. I can take a break when I am feenished weeth all of dis." He halted at the top of the stairs and eyed them for a moment, vaguely cursing himself for ever having the steep spiral staircase put in. Margo stopped beside him and crossed her arms.

He sighed and headed down.

"No problem. Eet…hardly hurts at all." He said through his teeth. Margo looked at him doubtfully. "I will see you lator tonight," he added to her before approaching Nefario who was standing near the door waiting for him with a stack of papers under his arm.

"Here you go, this should be everything." Nefario said, handing them over. He looked up and scowled. Gru followed his gaze. Ady had re emerged from the kitchen and approached them with one hand in her pocket and a mug in the other.

"Here," she said as she extended the mug a little nervously. Gru looked at it with caution.

"What?"

"You look like you need it."

He took it with his free hand and examined the contents. He thought it was tea at first, because of the tea bag sticking out, but it was much too dark and smelled vaguely of coffee.

"It's instant coffee. Brought it from home…" She said, seeing his expression.

"Instant coffee ees worse den boxed wine." He said, but took a drink anyways, grimacing slightly as he did. "At least weeth de wine, eef you drink enough eet stops mattering." She gave him a brief amused smile.

"I'll keep that in mind. You know, I know a couple of ways to reduce swelling."

"I am sure dat I can manage eet fine on my own."

"Right, well…let me know if you change your mind after you're done walking on it all day and it gets worse and starts changing color. See you later Gru." She added before heading back towards the kitchen. He smiled a little as he watched her go, then his smile faded when he caught Nefario's eye. The man's already perpetually crinkled face was further creased in a massive scowl.

"_What was that_?"

"What was what?" Gru asked guiltily. Dr. Nefario glared at him for a few moments before shaking his head with exasperation.

"I'm too bloody old for this," he muttered to himself before heading back towards the lift.

XXX

An hour or so later Ady was sitting on the floor by the crocodile couch with her legs crossed and her arms draped over her knees while, on Gru's large tv set a terrible horror movie from the 1940's played. Because Phil had refused to relinquish the hair from the girl's doll head, Agnes was styling the wig on the minion, who was making it difficult by rocking back and forth and occasionally bouncing or taking barrettes from the little girl and clipping them in places he thought were pretty. Edith was lying on her back on the couch and occasionally criticizing how fake the movie looked and Margo was sitting on her knees next to Ady attempting to watch the tv with a sort of puzzled bewilderment.

"So you uh…actually like this?" She asked after a moment.

"Yep."

"Why?"

"I dunno…I like bad movies. They're funny. Look, you can see that guy's face under the monster mask."

"That axe looks plastic." Edith mumbled from behind them.

"It probably is."

After Agnes twisted the fake hair for a while, occasionally making a little upset sounds. She grabbed Phil by the hand and pulled him over to Ady and Margo.

"How does it look?"

"What's that, Agnes?" Ady asked after a moment, her face carefully blank as the minion batted his eyelashes.

"French braids."

"Do you know how to do a French braid?" The little girl looked at the minion and then shook her head. Ady smiled.

"Do you know to do a braid?"

"Ummm…no…do you?"

"I don't know how to do French braids, I know how to do a braid…not very well, though."

"Can you show me?"

"On him? No, I don't think I have the strength for that."

"Aww." That was in unison from both Agnes and the minion.

"You can show her on my hair." Margo said.

"It'll probably come out lopsided." Ady said. Margo shrugged. "Okay then," She said, motioning for Margo to sit in front of her. The girl did so, pulling out her hair band. Agnes handed her the little plastic brush from the doll. Ady eyed it briefly before shrugging and combing it down Margo's hair.

"That didn't look like that guy's head came off…you can tell he's just pulling his shirt up and the woman barely hit him with the axe anyways. " Edith said. Ady paused for a moment to give her a look. "What…you'd have to hack at a guys head way more then once to cut it off."

"Certainly with a plastic Axe." Ady muttered as she separated pieces of Margo's hair before she started weaving them as Agnes watched intently.

"Okay so you separate the hair into three parts, then you take this piece and pull it over like this, and this piece and pull it over like this, and then you take the middle piece and pull it over the first piece and so on." She said as she finished the braid as carefully s she could, trying to keep it at least moderately straight. Margo reached back and touched it delicately.

"Not bad, not too lopsided." Ady said.

"I've never had my hair braided before." Margo said shyly.

"Really? Ever?" The girl shrugged

"I've done my own hair since I was six..." she said.

"Do you want me to take it out now?" Margo shook her head slightly and handed Ady her hair band. The woman took it from her and tied Margo's hair up at the end.

"Do mine!" Agnes said happily as Margo scooted back beside Ady.

"Uhh okay." Ady replied as the girl hopped into position and undid her ponytail. "You have to sit still though okay, I'm not that good at this as it is." She said holding the girl's head still.

"That blood looks really fake." Edith said. She'd changed her position so that she was looking over Ady's shoulder. "That looks like kool aid."

"Probably water and food coloring." Ady said while she brushed the younger girl's hair.

"It should be more gooey…like ketchup."

"You can make some pretty realistic looking blood with ketchup and water…or even better food coloring, flour and corn syrup."

"You can?" Edith said, vague interest lighting up her otherwise impassive expression.

"Yep, I used the food coloring one and traumatized a guy my mom brought home. Oh man, you throw like some sausage or raw meat in that and…wow…I should not be telling you this..." she said, finishing Agnes' braid and tying it off. The little girl hopped up and shook her head, smiling as the braid whipped around.

"I wonder if we have food coloring." Edith said.

Ady looked sideways at Edith who was preoccupied with thoughts of gooey realistic fake blood.

"Don't even think about it, kid. Just forget I said anything." Ady said. She felt a tug on her sleeve and turned towards Phil who had tottered over to her.

"Tranza wa cabello, no kami?" He said. Ady looked at Margo questionably.

"I think he wants you to braid his hair too."

"What? I said no." Ady said while vaguely pulling her sleeve away from him. "Hey where are you going?" She added as Edith slipped off of the couch and headed towards the hall.

"No where."

"Edith, stay out of the kitchen." The younger girl's response was lost.

"Te kudasai!" Phil said while tugging on Ady's sleeve again.

"Will you…all right, fine!" She said. Phil clapped excitedly before he sat down. "Margo, go check on your sister." Margo nodded and stood. Meanwhile Ady braided Phil's hair quickly and messily, occasionally looking towards the hall while Agnes watched her.

XXX

When Gru arrived at Polina's manor he got out of the tank with a sigh, grabbing the instant coffee as an after thought despite the fact that it was indeed pretty awful stuff.

"Did you 'ave a late morning Gru?" Polina asked as Gru was ushered into the containment center by a henchman of hers that he did not recognize. She was standing on the edge of the platform, one elbow in her palm and, as usual, cigarette smoke streaming from her long cigarette holder.

"I apologize for de delay," he responded.

"I imagine yesterday left you quite weary. Incidentally, I was hoping to get ze Whirl Machine up on ze moon today."

"Uhh, I am not certain dat I can…"

"Do not concern yourself. I am sending Henrick wiz some of my henchmen. After your venture yesterday I imagine you would benefit from a quieter afternoon." She turned towards him with a dark smile. "Shall we go to ze lounge?"

Without waiting for him to answer she slid her gloved arm around his and headed in that direction. Doug followed close enough so that Gru could practically feel the man's breath down his neck. Gru tried to keep up with Polina's long gait, flinching as his knee sent quivers of pain up his thigh.

When they reached the lounge Gru was shoved down onto Polina's chaise lounge. It might've been a relief to get off of his leg if it hadn't been for the fact that Polina situated herself next to him, brushing her long fur so that it spread over the seat and replacing her cigarette.

"I trust zat you and your Dr. Nefario completed your work yesterday?" She said as she set her hand on Gru's knee, causing him to wince slightly, in part because it was the bad knee and her fingernail was digging into a tender area and in part because…well she was touching his knee.

"What? Oh, yes…" he said as he took a sip from his mug and tried to scoot away as surreptitiously as possible. She only closed the distance. As she did she happened to eye the coffee Gru was holding with one fine pencil thin eyebrow raised.

"What ez zat?" She asked in the manner of someone examining an unknown insect skittering across their kitchen floor.

"Eets coffee." Gru said wearily. Polina, to his relief removed her hand from his knee and took the little tea like bag between her long fingers, raising it from his cup.

"Coffee?" She gave him a lofty smile.

"Instant coffee." Gru said awkwardly.

"A drink for those of little taste and little money. Doug, go fetch us a couple cups of ze Kopi Luwak ." Doug, never very far away, nodded and headed towards the kitchen. "Ze most expensive coffee en ze world," she said, her gaze returning to him.

"Yes, I 'ave tried eet before." Gru said bitterly. "As I understand eet ees expensive because the beans are collected from the waste ove a cat."

"A civet and I 'ave someone who makes ze coffee and raises zem for me. Each cup is made from the beans collected from a single civet and zen zey are skinned. Zere fur ez very lovely."

"Impressive, but I theenk I will stick weeth dis." Gru said while indicating the instant coffee. Polina's smile faded a little.

"You 'ave a taste for la merde?" There was something almost dangerous in her expression and for a moment Gru got the distinct impression that she was criticizing more then just his taste for coffee and also perhaps taking his decision as a personal slight. It was probably because he'd been around Ady for too long, he spoke without thinking.

"Perhaps eet ees, but at least eet is only _figuratively_ crap, which ees more den I can say for Kopi Luwak." It was clear that she did not find this amusing, though she gave him the briefest smile.

"I see," she said as she carefully put her cigarette out in an ivory ashtray. "Will you excuse me briefly…I need to…see to somesing."

XXX

After Ady finished the braiding the minion's hair, she headed towards the kitchen.

"Hey!" She said as she entered the door. Edith was trying to wrestle a bag of flour from Margo, who was attempting to keep it from her.

"Cut it out, Edith." Margo said. Ady watched wearily as the bag tore open and a small mushroom cloud of powder poofed up from it.

"Oops," Edith said before letting go of her side of the bag. "She did it," she added, while pointing to Margo who glared at her. Ady took the bag from the girl and set it on the counter before turning towards Edith and crossing her arms.

"If I help you make some fake blood, will you promise not to make it later on your own?" Edith brightened up a little.

"Kay."

"And…" Ady said while raising her hand. "You have to promise not to make a mess…or do anything with it that will make your dad mad at me."

"All right." Edith said, this time with less enthusiasm.

"I'm serious, if you use this stuff to trick him or something and he blames me, I will be very mad." Edith scowled and nodded a little.

"All right then, get me a bowl."

After cleaning up the spilled flour and gathering the ingredients for the fake blood they started mixing it together.

"Cool." Edith said, leaning over the bowl.

"Looks pretty gross huh? This stuff is edible too. It doesn't taste very good, but it is edible." Margo had been sitting at the counter playing with her braid. She looked up at Ady and cleared her throat a little timidly.

"Hey Ady, uh you know our dance recital on Saturday?" She asked finally.

"Uh huh."

"Well I was, I mean we were wondering if we got another ticket on Thursday if…maybe you'd want to come?" Ady looked up from stirring.

"I thought your dad was going."

"He is. We wanted to invite you too."

"Uhh…why?" Ady asked, looking slightly bewildered and perhaps a bit panicky. Margo shrugged.

"We want you to come."

"Well…I mean…wont your dad care?" .

"He said we could ask you."

"He did? Really?" Margo nodded. Ady looked up at the other two girls. Agnes was watching her intently and though Edith was being stealthier about it, it was clear that she was also waiting for an answer

"If you don't want to…" Margo started, a little unhappily.

"Uh no…I just…I mean…I could go, I guess…yeah, sure." Ady said. Margo smiled a little. Ady returned her smile with some awkwardness.

XXX

Dr. Nefario was down in the lab, researching the plans of the Whirl machine an trying to figure out how to hook up the computers to it so that when it was positioned on the moon they could control it.

There was a small computer in front of him, which he usually used to contact Gru from the television in the living room. It flickered briefly and then, in the place of previous blackness Polina's face appeared. Dr. Nefario jumped slightly.

"Dr. Nefario, I hope I find you well."

"Miss de Molyneaux…uh yes, quite well. To what do I owe this…uh…pleasure?"

"We 'ave somesing zat I sink bears some discussion."

"Do we?"

"Yes…I sink zat we do."

"Oh well…go on then."

"Upstairs on a coat rack by your door zere ez a tiny bug en ze pocket ove a white button up shirt. Do you know why I am telling you zis?" She asked.

"Not particularly…no." Nefario said with a frown.

"I am telling you zis because I recognize you as a man ove purpose. Et ez virtually unnoticeable, but et ez easy to access information from. I will ove course give you all ove ze information zat you will need to use et."

"Oh, uhh…use it on what?"

"I would like you to fix it to somesing, an article ove clothing, an item, somesing zat Gru uses often." Dr. Nefario watched the screen for a moment before clearing his throat.

"You want me to help you spy on Gru?" He pursed his lips slightly. "Strictly speaking, madam…that is not something I can readily agree to." He said carefully.

"Your loyalty ez notable. I was…concerned zat his focus may be waning, but, if you sink zat zis ez not ze case you now know where ze bug ez and may, ove course dispose ove et." She sat back, her eyes glittering slightly. Nefario sighed.

"Gru and I have worked together for a very long time…"

"Ove course you 'ave. I am not proposing somesing so dramatic…just…a way so zat you can keep an eye on him…make sure he ez staying on track…if zere ez any cause for worry…et ez zere. Have a good evening, Dr. Nefario." The screen went black again and her face was replaced with Nefario's beleaguered expression.

XXX

Okay, so a couple of things. Firstly, this is mostly a filler chapter and actually, it happens to be my very last filler chapter, at least as far as I know because actually we are getting kinda close to wrapping this up. There's one or two chapters before we get into the climaxy important stuff. (Probably two unless the next chapter is really long)

Secondly, sorry again that this took so long. I had to pick up a couple of classes in order to graduate at the end of this semester and have been swamped with work. I have basically no free time.

Lastly, for those of you without an account:

Rii: Yeaaahhh, he thinks he's doing what's best for Gru. (and also what's best for him and his career) Glad you liked the chapter ^^ More fluff to come.

Loo: Thank you very much and thank you for the review ^^ I am glad that you like her.

Roolsilver: Aww, thank you very much, although I am sorry it takes so long between updates. Hopefully this one did not dissapoint and I will try to get the next one up as soon as I can.

If I missed anyone I am very sorry. Hopefully this chapter has turned out okay. Thank you for all of your reviews filled with both praise and criticism. Have a lovely evening.


	18. Margo's Smile

Chapter 17:

Margo's Smile

During the next few days Nefario kept a close eye on Gru, while conscious of the bug which he'd removed from the front hall and nestled away secretly in the lab. He didn't want to spy on Gru. That would feel too much like betrayal, but he _was_ very concerned about how the younger man was acting.

He remembered when the girls had first come to the house; the way Gru's attention had shifted from the moon heist to them. His boss, which had always been vigilante when it had come to works of evil, whose whole life had been dedicated to the art of iniquity was making pancakes and playing tea party. After the whole incident was over Nefario had come to accept the fact that some of Gru's attention would from then on go to girls once they finally did get back to work again, what he had not been expecting was for the silliness to continue. Maybe it was some sort of mid life crisis. Gru's next birthday was coming up in a couple of months, he was around the right age and was probably due one. Some men bought fancy cars or started trying to relive their college days. Young women factored in there somewhere didn't they? Granted, normally the young women weren't insufferable and they were generally better looking. Regardless, if it was some kind of mid life crisis Nefario could not imagine a worse time for it.

Because they were so close to seeing Polina's plans come to fruition, Nefario had to make certain that Gru kept his focus so that they might finish everything they had to. For the most part the only thing they had left to do was to set up a connection to the Whirl Machine. But it wasn't just about this. If Gru did manage to get himself all worked up over this girl then finishing the technology was the least of his problems and so Nefario was with as much tact as he could manage trying to keep Gru away from Miss Owens. He hoped he was worrying over nothing and that the younger man's insistence that there was nothing between them was genuine but he couldn't take the risk.

On the night after Polina had spoken to him he'd made sure that Ady was gone before Gru returned, which hadn't been easy considering how difficult it was to make that woman do anything. On those occasions when they were around each other, he made sure to be there to keep tabs on their exchanges and actions.

So far, it seemed to be working and they appeared to be on course, which was a great comfort to Nefario. In fact, some of the concern that had been building over the last week or so had begun to dissipate. That is, it was going well until the night before the dance recital.

XXX

Gru and Nefario were working on hooking up the last of the technology to the program so that they could access the Whirl Machine from Polina's estate.

"This'll be the last one." Nefario said. "We're finishing earlier then I expected." Gru nodded wearily as he eyed the screen. Because their technology was so old, everything on the computer took an eternity to load.

"I will ask Polina to send someone to pick eet up tonight." He said while rubbing at his eyes with a yawn.

"Why don't you just deliver it tomorrow morning?"

"I am not going over dere." He said as he straightened. His knees popped as he did. "De gurls recital ees tomorrow." Gru said the last with a very firm resolve.

"Well it isn't until four o' clock." Nefario pointed out.

"I…would prefer to not 'ave to rush." He said. Nefario knew better at least then to argue with this.

"Have you and Miss de Molyneaux gone over the plans for Sunday?" He asked while vaguely pounding on the computer screen, which was slowly inching along.

"We 'ave…sort ove." He said bitterly. "I am still a bit hazy on de details." It was clear that Polina was just fine with him being slightly in the dark about her plan, despite the fact that the plan was indeed almost over. He'd asked her about the men they'd kidnapped, wondering idly why, if they had a machine that could control the weather, they needed them as well.

"_Leverage" she'd answered. "Information gazzering…and to induce panic. We've cut off ze heads ove many governments in ze world. Ze body may still be able to function, some of zem may ave found new heads, but zere ez a gap, waiting for us to fill it." Then she had looked at him and smiled in the way that was becoming increasingly sickening to him. "I like to cover all ze bases." _

"_Doesn't de giant machine dat can make tornadoes geeve us enough leverage?" _

"_Zese men are not your ordinary government officials. Zey are smart resourceful men who lead zere countries. People rely on zem. Wizout zem zere people are slightly lost. Besides, say ze Whirl Machine fails for some reason…et ez always important to 'ave a backup plan." _

World domination. It should have felt like the most extraordinary moment in his villainous career, but was in fact making him feel a little bit sick. There was an old saying about riding a tiger. Sometimes it was more perilous to stop doing a dangerous thing, then to keep doing it, and that is basically what it amounted to in the end. Either way he couldn't shake the feeling that things were going to go very badly for him at the end of the ride and had resolved to make certain he was heavily armed when they did.

Gru tried to push these thoughts out of his mind. It was six o' clock. Early enough so he could perhaps have some dinner with the girls, read them a bedtime story and get a good night's sleep. Then he would spend a day _just_ being a dad. He felt like this was important. On Sunday he could take over the world, but on Saturday he'd go to the recital and watch an excerpt from sleeping beauty and he wouldn't think about Polina or the Whirl Machine or villainy.

He stuffed his hands in his pockets and started towards the lift.

"Oh Gru, hold on." Dr. Nefario said as he joined him on the small platform. The lift shook to life and began its ascent. Gru looked sideways at the Nefario as he smacked his lips slightly and raised his eyebrow. He sighed when they came to a stop.

"Ees dere something that you were wanting?" he asked wearily.

"Well, seeing as we're finished, I figured that I would make certain that Miss Owen's got on her way all right and received what I assume will be some of her final wages…all things considered." Gru felt a vague jerk in his stomach. Granted, lately, this was the customary reaction whenever she came to mind, but this time it was associated with bitterness. He hadn't thought of that. After Sunday he wouldn't need a full time babysitter anymore.

"Oh…right." He said and then cleared his throat slightly when he realized that a bit of disappointment had crept into his voice. "I am sure dat I can handle dat, dere ees really no need for you to be here." He added.

"Maybe I ought to tag along in any case."

"What exactly do you theenk I am goeeng to do? I will give her, her pay…and be done weeth eet." Gru said while removing his hands from his pocket and folding them behind his back as he stepped into the living room. Much to his annoyance, Nefario followed behind.

"I'm just looking out for your best interests Gru."

"I will keep dat een mind." Gru said as he opened the door into the kitchen.

Ady and the girls were sitting at the table flipping through Gru's cookbook. Margo was sitting across from Ady, turning the pages while Agnes clutched at her arm and Edith sat between Margo and Ady with her face down on the table and her arms hanging down.

Nefario lingered in the doorway as Gru approached them.

"Hey dad." Margo said, as she looked up from the cookbook.

"Daddy!" Agnes asked. "Do you want to help us make dinner?"

"What ees eet you are making?" Gru asked cautiously. There was still a large covered bowl of fake blood sitting in the fridge. Edith wouldn't let him throw it out.

"We're trying to decide between chicken and rice and chicken pasta." Margo said.

"Ah, so you 'ave grown tired ove ruining easy recipes and 'ave moved on to ruining more deeficult ones." Gru said to Ady.

"I like to think the difficult ones stick to your pans better." she said without looking up.

"Een dat case, you would be wanting to go weeth de chicken and rice. Rice ees very deeficult to remove from de pan once eet has been burned." He said as he picked up the cookbook. Ady looked up with some amusement and for a moment Gru held her gaze, feeling slightly dizzy. He heard the faint sound of Nefario clearing his throat and Gru looked away clumsily. "Uh, actually I theenk I will be making deener tonight." He said as he removed his money clip from his pocket and handed over her pay. "We are feenished downstairs..."

"Can Ady stay for dinner?" Margo asked.

"Dere ees no…uh." He looked back towards the doorway. "…reason for her to be stayeeng, Margo." Ady took the money from him with her eyebrow raised and then picked her bag up from the table and slung it over her shoulder.

"It's okay, Margo. I need to get the car back anyways before Dillon wakes up from his all day stupor and realizes it's gone." She said.

"Oh hey, your ticket. Hold on." Margo said before sliding off of the chair and heading out into the hall.

"I notice you've managed to go a week without injuring yourself." Ady said as she leaned against the counter. "Is your knee feeling better?"

"Yes." Gru said, while trying not to look at the doorway.

"I looked up your wine." She said casually.

"Oh?" Gru said with some discomfort.

"Yep…no wonder it was so good. At that price not being good would probably be illegal."

"Eet was very fine wine…kept een good quality and I make certain my wine cellor ees de perfect condition for keeping."

"Well if I have to spend a thousand dollars for that kind of wine I think I'll stick with the boxed stuff…or beer."

"Dere ees a blend ove Chateau Margaux from de 1700's dat ees 225,000 dollars." He said with a smile. "Dat bottle was probably only around three thousand which ees a bit high for dat year, but eet did seem to be een good shape." There was silence, punctured only by Nefario's throat clearing, Agnes' humming and Edith kicking the table.

"So what's the difference between that wine and the bottles you have over there on the rack?" Gru turned to look at them.

"I mostly use those for cooking. De difference ees you can buy dem at de store. Finding a perfectly kept bottle of Chateau Margaux ees a beet trickier. Half ove de time dey are not well kept."

"You have many of them?"

"Dat was de only one. I got eet six years ago. I suppose I'll 'ave to track down another bottle now." He realized the mistake he made too late.

He looked at her, feeling a brief attack of butterflies, which, by the feel of them might have had lasers strapped to their wings.

"Uhh, not dat eet would be…too difficult a theeng to do," he started awkwardly, while cursing himself briefly for implying that he would share a rare three thousand bottle of wine he'd kept in storage for six years with a babysitter.

"Ahem." Dr. Nefario entered the kitchen, after getting fed up with trying t get Gru's attention from the hall.

"Get tired of lurking in the doorway?" Ady said after she tore her eyes off of Gru.

"I need to speak with you." Nefario said, erasing her out of existence. Gru nodded wearily and followed him.

"The extra glass was in case the other one was dirty?" Nefario said.

"What?" Gru said after a long moment while he tried to work out what sort of code this was.

"That's what you said when you got that wine out of the cellar. I suppose you've forgotten. You probably had other things on your mind at the time. You…are you completely out of your mind?"

"Eet was…not…a beeg deal."

"Look, It's clear to me that this girl has the bulge on you." He said. "So I think it would be best if you go upstairs until she is gone. Starting anything with this young woman can only lead to trouble Gru."

"She has de what on me?" Gru said finally.

"What? The bulge…the advantage…it's slang."

"Er." That came from the stairway. Margo was standing at the bottom of the stairs looking slightly awkward. "Sorry, I've got Ady's ticket." Gru moved out of the way of the kitchen door.

"Ticket, what ticket?" Nefario said suspiciously.

"To the dance recital." Margo said slowly while looking from her father to Nefario.

"She's going!" He said while glaring at Gru.

"I…eet was not my idea." He said defensively. "De gurls…"

"I really must put my foot down at this, Gru. I don't care if it wasn't your idea, you need to do something about this." Gru frowned and looked at Margo, who raised her eyebrow. His frown turned into a scowl. He motioned for Margo to hand him the ticket. She did after a moment of hesitation. Gru eyed Nefario briefly and then headed into the kitchen.

"Here ees your teeckit for tomorrow." He said determinedly. Ady took it from him slightly bewildered by the bravado in which he handed it to her. "Be here at noon eef you are wanting a ride to de dance studio." He said the last while crossing his arms and casting a look at Nefario.

"Uh thanks. See you then." She added. "Bye guys." She said while waving to the girls and inching around Nefario who was glaring at her

XXX

After a dinner of chicken and rice, perfectly cooked, not at all burned, Gru headed upstairs to his bedroom while the girls got ready for bed. He removed his shoes and socks and set them inside, pausing as he heard a faint knock, for courtesy's sake on the door beside the massive hole in the wall.

"Yes?" He said, looking up. Margo appeared in the opening.

"When are you going to get this fixed?" She asked as she crawled through.

"I weel geet around to eet eventually. I will be een to read to you gurls een a moment."

"Okay." Margo said while approaching him idly. "Is uncle Nefario mad at you?"

"He ees just…making a beeg deal over nothing." Gru said as he shed his jacket and set it aside.

"He seemed really upset that we invited Ady to the recital."

"Yes well…perhaps he ees just envious because he wants to be watching de ballet." Margo smiled amusedly as she sat down on the bed next to Gru.

"We'll get him a ticket for the next show."

"Oh…I am sure he would be appreciative…for dat." Gru said while smiling roguishly.

"Hey, do you think that maybe you could wear something more casual tomorrow?" Margo asked while vaguely picking at his jacket.

"What ees de matter with de way I dress?"

"Nothing, but I think you kind of scare the other parents. Maybe if you wear something like jeans or something, you wont be so…scary looking."

"I like being scary looking."

"Yeah, but…maybe just this once?"

"I will consider eet," he said. "I am making no promises."

"And you know…" Margo started casually, still messing with his coat. "Maybe…Ady would like it too," He looked up at her, taken aback.

"Why…would I…care about what she theenks?" he said awkwardly, his face coloring. Margo shrugged with a smile.

"I dunno, just a thought," she said happily before sliding off of the bed and heading towards the door.

XXX

When Ady got home, Dillon was sitting on the couch, his dirty socks up on the table while he watched tv.

"Morning."

"It is seven pm, Dillon." She said as she nudged the door closed and kicked off her shoes.

"Morning for me. Hey, you're not babysitting tomorrow right?" He asked.

"Um, well…no…technically no." Ady said as she headed into the kitchen to find something to eat.

"Great, you can come out clubbing with me and Vanessa and Ronnie and Steve. We're going after her shift at The Hideaway. There's some new place opening downtown."

"Uhh…no I can't…I have plans." She said as she settled for a bowl of cereal.

"What are you doing?" he asked as he turned on the couch.

"I'm watching an excerpt from Sleeping Beauty…" she eyed his blank look for a moment. "It's a ballet." She added.

"You hate ballet."

"Yeah well…this is not really ballet ballet…mostly it'll be a bunch of little kids stepping on each others feet." Ady said and briefly wondered how she thought that was supposed to sound better.

"You're going…to a children's ballet?" He asked, making it sound like she was suggesting going into a cave filled with snakes.

"Uh…yeah…the kids I baby-sit for, they invited me." She said uncomfortably.

"There'll be kids there?"

"Normally when you have a children's ballet, there are children, yes." There was a pause as Ady poured her cereal.

"All right, that's it…I can't just sit around and say nothing anymore. I mean this is just…weird, Ady. This babysitting stuff has gotten way out of hand." Ady raised her eyebrow as he stood up from the couch.

"Okay hold on, before you say anything else you have to clear something up for me." She said as she leaned against the counter. "When, in the last few weeks have you said nothing. You complain about those drawings every time you pass the fridge…the other day when I tried to make chicken, you bitched for an hour."

"That's not really the point...this, all of this…"

"What?" She asked with some annoyance.

"Cooking, hanging up drawings, going to…dance recitals it's like…you're getting…" he paused as if the thought was too horrible to articulate. "Well look, when we moved in together…I mean, we agreed that neither one of us wanted this kind of thing."

"Cooking?" Ady said after a pause.

"No…this…you're acting…do you know what this kind of thing leads to?"

"What thing? Where?"

"It leads to… having kids and stuff." There was a brief silence while Ady considered this statement bewilderedly.

"Did you ever take a health class Dillon? That's not how it works."

"You know what I mean."

"No…I really don't. Some of the things you say, I have no idea what you mean."

"You're acting…maternal." He said the word like a curse. She frowned.

"I'm not…I mean…it isn't like that." She started uncomfortably.

"What happened to all that stuff about parents being unreliable and the idea of a happy family is a delusion of old sitcoms and religious tradition, how parenthood is death,"

"Well maybe some of that stuff isn't true…at least for some people."

"What about for you? You're not really mom material Ady."

"I never said I was." Ady said coldly. "If what you're getting at is that your worried I'm going to ever have even the slightest urge to start a family with you, you can stop worrying…it will never, ever happen."

"Fine, good, just…just look, remember that old picture you keep of your mom and dad and you, where they're smiling and you said it was taken a few days before he split. You and your mom don't even talk anymore. I'm trying to help you."

"And I'm trying very hard not to break your arm." He moved as inconspicuously as possible out of arm length from her and started towards the bedroom.

"All right…I'm going…just, you know…think about what I said."

He disappeared into the bedroom. Ady unfolded her arms and then after a moment crossed over to the couch and sat down with a sigh.

XXX

On his way towards the girl's room Gru ran into Nefario who was looking slightly discomfited.

"Gru, do you think maybe I could…um…borrow your jacket, for um…some…alterations?" Gru paused.

"Alterations?"

"Well, I assume you'll be wanted more space for…weapons and…such…for Sunday…I figured I'd add a few more hidden pockets and the like." He coughed vaguely.

"Okay…I suppose, dat ees a good idea." Gru said as he retrieved the jacket and handed it to Nefario, who took it solemnly and headed back towards the lab.

Once there he set it on a counter with a sigh before carefully unlocking a drawer, hidden carefully on the underside of the counter and removing Polina's bug. With a frown he took up a small tool and cut a little rip in Gru's coat before tucking the bug inside.

"I'm sorry Gru…but…it's for your own good," he said, his fingers trembling slightly as he stitched it up again.

XXX

_Beneath Gru's slender fingers, the rocket controls shook and vibrated all the way up into his shoulders. He opened one blue eye, vaguely registering the dance studio in the distance before crashing into the ground, careful to slam on the breaks before the rocket plowed into the building. _

_He struggled out of the cockpit and out of the space suit, stumbling, trying to get his jacket on before plunging through the doors into an empty room. A severely empty room. A janitor was picking up chairs as if to emphasize this. He remembered the feeling. The knowledge that of all of the things in his life that he might have felt remorse for, this was the one that would keep him up at night._

_"Show's over." The voice hadn't come from the janitor, but rather from behind him. Gru turned. Polina was standing behind him, cigarette smoke drifting around her. She approached him at a saunter. _

_"Dis was de last chance I had." Gru said, almost pleading. _

_"Zis ez ze price of greatness." Polina replied while moving her fingers from his stomach up to his chest, her fingernails almost crawling. _

Gru opened his eyes and stared at his ceiling. He took a moment to register where he was and what day it was before he breathed out carefully and rubbed his palm across his eyes. He'd been having a dream similar to this almost every night for the last week, although this one had been the first one with Polina in it.

He was just beginning to relax when he felt movement under his blanket and, more alarmingly under his silk pajama shirt, akin to the feeling of Polina's long fingernails trailing across his chest. He pushed his blanket off and unbuttoned the shirt, took a second to observe the cookie bot as it took another step and then shouted as he shoved it off of him, stumbling out of the bed in the process. He sat on the floor for a moment, his heart pounding, before inching back towards the bed and looking overtop the mattress at the bot as it righted itself.

The little camera turned towards him, red laser light briefly flashing on his iris before it started crawling towards the hole in his wall and then up and out into the hallways.

Gru stood up and followed it with a growl. It paused near the stairs as Gru caught up. His eyes flashed briefly towards the door into the girl's room before they returned to the cookie bot.

"Just try eet…you will be extremely sorry." He whispered through his teeth. To his relief the cookie started down into the hallway. He hurried down himself, jumped the last few stairs and ran down the hall towards the front door, where the cookie bot paused long enough to cut a small cookie shaped hole in the bottom of the doorway. Gru threw the front door open, where he stopped because going any further would have caused him to run into Doug, which would have been like running into a wall.

"Good morning Gru." Polina said from behind the big man.

"What are you doeeng here…and why deed you put dat theeng een my house?" Gru asked while taking a step back to avoid having to look up into Doug's nostrils.

"Zere ez a problem wiz ze connection to ze Whirl Machine. Ze men I sent up zere to connect everysing can't seem to make contact wiz your program."

"What ees wrong with a phone call?" Gru asked weakly as he eyed the cookie bot, which had crawled up Doug's massive frame and was now sitting in his colossal palm.

"I figured zis would be slightly more effective. I need you to come down to my estate and fix your technology if et ez broken, ef et ez not, zen I need you to tell my associates what et ez zey 'ave to do to connect to et."

"I am sure dat Dr. Nefario can help you, I am…a leetle busy today." Gru said with resolve, this crumbled slightly as the woman approached him, smiling a little. She placed a gloved hand on his chest where his silk nightshirt was still open and then curled her fingers around his exposed chest hair and pulled. He grunted.

"I am not employing Dr. Nefario. Ze machinery ez en my containment room. I suggest you be zere soon as well. Tomorrow all ove my plans come to realization. Ef you sink I will risk anysing getting enze way ove zat because you are a 'little busy' zen you are mistaken." She breathed her most recently inhaled smoke into his face and then let go of his chest hair.

"But…" Gru started, while rubbing at his chest.

"I will leave Doug to make certain you are on track." Polina interrupted him. Unsaid, but certainly understood was the fact that, with Doug she was also leaving the cookie bot. He watched her as she returned to the limo parked at the edge of his property and then, after casting a wary look at Doug, Gru returned to the house, and stood in the hall for a moment. Oookay, if he hurried and went to Polina's estate and fixed this matter he could still easily make it to the dance recital. Or he could stay here and risk being blown up. Would Polina really do that if it meant she'd then have to work out the problem for herself? He thought about this for a moment. He wouldn't put it past her.

Gru trudged back upstairs. When he returned to his room he eyed the pinstripe pants and the turtleneck he'd absently set aside the night before, before heading to his dresser and shifting through it's contents before pulling out a pair of jeans tucked carefully at the bottom of one of the drawers and then after further searching a plaid button up shirt. He set them down on the edge of his bed and sighed heavily while casting a brief sad look towards the hall.

XXX

Ady had fallen asleep on the couch. She was jostled awake when her cell phone began to vibrate. Fr a moment, she peered blearily at the numbers on the vcr. 6:30am. A phone call before the sun was fully risen almost never amounted to a good thing. She picked the phone up, took note that she didn't recognize the number and flipped it open.

"Hello?"

"Please do not hang up on me." She paused mid yawn.

"Wha…Gru? Do you have any idea what time it is? How did you get this number?"

"Not important."

"No, I think it's a legitimate question."

"I ran you through a…database…I need a favor."

"What database?"

"Lator, a favor please…"

"What do you want?" Ady said while rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

"I need you to take de gurls to de dance studio."

"I thought you were going…" she said, suddenly awake, she'd meant for it to sound disdainful, but it came out hollow in her ears, almost childlike. He paused.

"I am goeeng, but I 'ave a few theengs I need to do and de gurls 'ave to be dere early,"

"Well…why should I do this for you, Gru? Do I owe you any favors? How do I know you'll even show up?"

"Please, I 'ave no choice een dees. I will be dere. I will not mees eet, but I need a leetle time." She was quiet for a few minutes.

"All right." She said with a sigh. "But Gru, if you're not there, I swear that busted nose and that swollen knee will seem like nothing compared to the injuries you have when I'm done with you."

XXX

"Good, you made et." Polina said as Gru walked into the containment area in a hurried gait. "What ez et you are wearing?" she added with some distaste as she eyed the casual clothing. He had his jacket too, which Nefario had insisted he take as well. It didn't match the plaid shirt and jeans very well.

"Let us geet dees over with." Gru said, ignoring her question. She handed him a headset.

"My associates are on ze ozzer line, we cannot make a connection to ze machinery on ze moon." Gru slipped the headphones over his ears and eyed the computer screen as Polina pulled up Nefario's program.

"We tested eet en de lab…eet worked fine. Eet ees probably de distance, most likely dere ees some interference. Satellite signals geeting een de way."

"I did not sink ove zat. Get me my contact en Nasa, see if he can do somesing about ze interference. Zen we will try it again."

Gru pulled his cell phone out and checked the time nervously.

XXX

The studio space where the recital would be held in a couple hours was currently made up of little girls trying to get their ribbons in their hair and their ballet slippers tied while their parent's scolded them for spills in their tutus or rips in their hose.

Ady put her hands in her sweatshirt pockets with a sigh, feeling the tickets nestled inside with the fibers. In Gru's hurry to get to Polina's estate he had accidentally left his ticket pinned to the calendar. Ady had grabbed it absently on Agnes' worried insistence on their way out.

The girls stood by gloomily and watched as a janitor grabbed a stack of fold up metal chairs and headed into a separate room with a stage to set them up.

Ady looked sideways at them. Agnes was staring at the floor dismally and holding onto Margo's hand. Beside her, Edith was glaring forward. She still had her hat and boots on and Margo had a vague look of grim determination on her face.

"Come on." She said after a moment. "The class is over there."

"Oh, good, there you girls are." The teacher said with a smile as they approached the class miserably. "Miss Owens, nice to see you, where's Mr. Gru?"

"He's uh, coming later," she said, while trying not to look at the girls.

"Oh, okay then, well would you like to help us set up some of the stage equipment, the other parents don't seem all that willing to for some reason."

"Uhhh…I don't…yeah okay whatever," she conceded.

She followed the girls and the teacher into the stage area and eyed the colorfully painted cardboard decorations with a sigh. The children couldn't really help set up the equipment properly, so it was mostly her and the teacher and one or two of the older kids, including Margo who had maintained an expression of bleakness that was probably more commonly seen on people years older then her.

Ady noticed that Edith and Agnes frequently looked towards the doorway. Margo did not.

"So, what do these giant cardboard flowers have to do with sleeping beauty?" Ady asked as she approached the oldest girl with a colorful flower in tow.

"We use the same decorations for every show," she said as she straightened Agnes' ribbon while the small girl squirmed. When she was finished Agnes headed back over to the doorway, looking out into the entryway to keep watch for Gru. Margo straightened and watched her before turning her miserable gaze on Ady.

"He's not coming, is he?" She said it low enough so that he sisters couldn't hear. Ady frowned.

"He said he was," she said awkwardly.

"He said he would come to the last one too." She said as she sat down on the edge of the stage. "I mean, I wasn't actually expecting him to be there but…this time I really thought he would," she rested her chin on her arm. Ady sat down next to her.

"There's still forty minutes till the show starts. He's got time." Margo didn't respond. "Besides, we agreed that if he didn't come I was going to kick his butt."

"Ladies, come over here, time to do some stretches." The dance instructor said, getting both Margo and Ady's attention. Margo stood and started towards the group before pausing. She surprised Ady by hugging her across her shoulders from behind.

"I'm glad you're here." Margo said before letting go and hurrying off.

XXX

Gru tapped his foot impatiently, occasionally looking at the time as Polina checked the connection for the fifth or sixth time.

"Maybe de distance ees a problem. Eef we had a satellite between us and de moon we could push the signal through dat." He suggested when it was clear they weren't making any progress.

"Not a bad idea." Polina said. "I will make some phone calls," she said as she headed across the platform, her shoes making god-awful sounds on the glass. Gru sighed, checked the time again and then carefully removed the headset; cutting off the sound of ineptness from the men Polina had working on the moon. He set this aside on the control panel before casting a brief look at Doug, who was looming nearby.

"I am just…goeeng to…use de…bathroom," he said before heading with perhaps over exaggerated indifference towards the doorway. Thank god her minions weren't very bright. When he got out of the containment area he picked up his pace. The woman's estate was a maze but he'd been down it enough times so that he was able to find his way back to the hall where the pictures of her late husbands were hung.

He halted at the opening to the living room and then ducked quickly back into the hall. Polina was standing about twenty feet away and was on the phone.

"I know I just asked you to move zem. I want you to move one back now and give me it's access code so zat we can hack into it," she said as she exhaled a cloud of smoke. "Believe me, Nasa can do nothing compared to what I will do to you if you do not do zis."

Gru very carefully removed his shoes and then inched across the room slowly in his socks while the woman was turned away and busy with her phone call. When he got out of sight of her he breathed out and then headed towards the front door…which was blocked by one of her minions.

The big man raised his eyebrows…or lack there of…he didn't really have eyebrows…although he did have a prominent forehead.

"I uh…left sometheeng…een my car…I need to go retrieve eet," the man looked at him before grabbing him by the sleeve of his coat and shoving him back towards the living room. Gru stumbled, straightened his jacket and then, with one final look at the time, straightened to his full height, which was not very impressive next to that of her henchman and unzipped his coat.

"Let me put dis een a different way," he said as he removed a large gun from an inner pocket.

XXX

A few moments later he was running across Polina's front yard towards the tank while absently dialing Dr. Nefario's number on his phone.

"Gru?" The old man answered.

"I am on my way to de dance studio, I had to sneak out before we made a connection to de moon. I need you to take care ove eet."

"You…snuck out…don't you think Miss de Molyneaux will mind?"

"Eet does not matter, just see dat eet ees done. I am goeeng to de recital!" He hung up as he started the tank and sped down the street.

On the whole trip there he envisioned the scenario of his nightmares again and again. He'd get there and it would be over. He'd waited too long. He should have snuck out earlier; he should have found a way to not leave the house at all.

It wasn't as if attending this ballet would make up for missing the last one, because it hadn't been about missing the show, it had been the fact that he'd missed the show after letting Miss Hattie take them away. He'd never be able to make it up to them for doing that. But he couldn't break another promise. He just couldn't.

Gru's driving was perilous at the best of times. On this occasion what little traffic laws he did usually pay attention to for whatever reason, like driving on the right side of the road were completely forgotten. He pulled up to the dance studio, barely bothering to park, shed his coat and ran up the stairs, busting through the door out of breath before he approached an alarmed middle aged man who was accepting tickets.

"Uh…your ticket sir?" The man said. Gru stared at him for a moment not comprehending before he started to search the pockets of his jeans.

"Oh…no, no, no," he said desperately. "No, dees cannot be happening to me now."

"Uhh, this is only for parents and other invitees sir."

"I 'ad a teeckit, look, my daughters are een de show."

"Uh, I can't just let people in, sorry." He said. It was clear by his expression that casual clothes or not, Gru still did not appear trustworthy. He furthered this impression by grabbing the man by his collar and lifting him off of his feet.

"I need to geet een dere. Eef you do not let me through, I swear you will suffer my wrath!"

XXX

Ady had stepped out of the large room with the stage and out into the sunshine to avoid the murmur of gossiping mothers and an inexperienced band tuning up so that she might attempt to call Gru with the intention of threatening his life, should he not show up soon. There was about ten minutes the show officially started. He was running out of time.

She wasn't able to get a hold of him but on her way in, she spotted the badly parked tank, with the now completely totaled cars beside it.

She smiled a little. It did occur to her that this was not a sane and proper reaction to such a sight, but she let this go and headed back into the dance studio in time to see Gru assaulting the ticket man.

"Uhh," she started as she touched his shoulder, getting his attention. He looked at her as the ticket man shouted vaguely about calling the cops. "What are you doing, Gru?"

"I…cannot find my teeckit," he said wearily while setting the trembling man down.

"Yeah, you left it at your house," she said as she pulled it out of her sweater pocket and handed it to the ticket man who was staring at her wildly as Gru let go of his collar. Gru's expression shifting to tired relief.

"Uhh, in the uhh…circumstances, I'm not too sure I should be letting him in…ticket or not," the man said while trying to hid behind a sign.

Before Gru could respond, Ady surprised him by grabbing his hand.

"It's okay, he suffers from mental illness, it's under control," she said as she pulled him gently towards the door. "I'll make sure he doesn't cause trouble."

"Mental illness?" Gru said blankly as they headed into the stage area.

"Well, you have to be suffering from something, I find it difficult to believe you could possibly be entirely sane."

Gru stared at the curtain, still draw on the stage.

"I deed not miss de show?" He asked.

"No, it hasn't started yet…ran it kind of close though." She looked up at him. "You okay? You look kind freaked out."

"Yeah…" he said. "I made eet," he added, as if needing to confirm this.

"Uh huh," she said carefully, speaking in a manner one might use while talking to someone who was inching along the edge of a very high building. "Seats are over here, come on." He let her pull him towards them and relaxed as he settled into one of the uncomfortable chairs with a sigh.

After a moment when he was finally able to shake the certainty that he would not be able to see the show, he eyed Ady who settled into her own seat.

"So I guess dis means I will not be receiving any injuries today?"

"We'll see, day his still young. Nice jeans." He smiled before eyeing, with some annoyance, a woman next him, who was talking very loudly on her cell phone, in order to be heard over the din.

Ady looked sideways at Gru while he was distracted by a very large woman who was trying to edge her way along the row of seats and his regrets at leaving his jacket with all of his weapons in the car. He did not fit in that sort of environment; his upper body was too broad to be packed shoulder to shoulder with the other parents and his legs were too long for the small metal chairs, so he gave off some awkwardness as he attempted to cross his leg and elbowed the woman next to him for space. Ady smiled a little as the lights dimmed and the spotlights turned on.

Beside him, the woman was still talking when the curtain opened. Without much concern Gru plucked the phone out of her hand and closed it in the face of her stunned silence before tossing it vaguely behind him. The woman stared at him for a moment before scowling and standing up to find her fallen cell phone.

When the play started and the girls flooded onto the stage, Gru's face softened and despite the uncomfortable chairs he sat back with a smile.

Most of the little girls, bouncing in their tutus wore looks of naïve bliss. Margo's expression was somewhat distant and focused vaguely downward, as she thought about the dance steps, possibly going through them in her head while she waited for the recital to be over. When she finally did look up and her eyes drifted over the crowd and settled on Gru, for a moment her expression turned to that of perplexity as if she wasn't entirely ready to believe what she was seeing. This changed swiftly to surprise and then she blinked and smiled. Her smile lit up her whole face. It was like the sun had come out.

XXX

The end is nigh my dearies. One more chapter till we get into the climax. Next chapter will be predominantly fluff, so enjoy that before Polina ruins everything.

To those of you without an account or who I missed for whatever reason:

Arandomreader: Yeah, sorry it took so long. It's insane how ridiculously busy I have been as of late. Hopefully the next update with come quicker.

IamYourPhobia: Indeed she is, and even more so in this chapter. I hope you are enjoying it. ^^

Eleta: Thank you very much. I am glad that it is coming along naturally and I am pleased to hear that I am doing a decent job on the characters. Thank you very much for the review ^^

Misty: I'm glad you like it ^^ Yeah, it's getting close. I'm kind of sad it's almost over too, although I have been playing with the idea of a sequel depending on how it goes. So, we'll see. Thanks so much for the review : )

Eskie02: Glad to hear it : ) I will try to update sooner next time.

Gag: Thanks : ) Glad you liked it, and thanks for the review. ^^

Rii: Ehehehe, You'll feel even more like punching her soon…belieeevvvee me. And yeah, I'm sure she'd hate that. More fluff to come. Thanks for the review ^^

Roolsilver: I'm glad you liked it. I like awkward adorable. Hopefully this chapter was all right as well. Thank you very much for you review. ^^

Thanks again for all of your wonderful reviews. As of the last chapter this story officially has more reviews then any other fic I've written to date. So yeah, thanks, I really appreciate it and I really love reading all of the feedback. Have a great evening, all.


	19. A Metaphor Involving Grilled Cheese

Chapter 18:

A Metaphor Involving Grilled Cheese Sandwiches

It couldn't really be called ballet; although it could be argued that it was taped and recorded far more then many professional ballets were, from many different angles and with inexperienced hands.

Some of the younger girls weren't very good and at least one child paused mid step to wave enthusiastically at her parents. Ady mused that it was sort of more entertaining because of how bad it was. At some point she looked sideways at Gru. He had his arms crossed and a light smile was touching his features, giving him that soft look again. She rested her arms on the back of the chair in font of her and her chin on them to watch the rest of the show.

When it was over they met the girls back stage. Agnes automatically clasped onto Gru's leg.

"Weren't we good daddy?" She asked as Edith jumped down off of the side of the stage, landing heavily on her boots.

"Yes, you deed very well." He said while leaning down to detach her; Margo surprised him by throwing her arms around his neck when he did.

"Thank you, I mean for coming."

"I would not 'ave meesed eet for anything." He said as he scooped her up.

Agnes stumbled off of Gru's leg and hobbled over to Ady who was hovering nearby awkwardly and trying not to interrupt.

"Did you like the ballet?"

"Yeah, it was…great…best I've ever seen." She said not adding that the only other two ballets she'd ever seen were one she practically was dragged to as a child and another she had to go to in college for a class. Agnes beamed.

"What was your favorite part?"

"Well, I liked the part when Edith stepped on that girls foot and started that domino effect and I liked it when that big cardboard castle fell on the guy in the Hawaiian shirt."

"I liked that part too." Edith said while raising her hat a little.

"That wasn't really part of the show." Margo said amusedly as she unloosed her arms from her father's neck.

"Yeah, well it would have been way better if I could have used the fake blood." Edith said dismally.

"It was bad enough you brought it in that water bottle and the teacher found it." Margo replied.

"Well she didn't have to confiscate it, I was just going to use it a little bit…the show was getting boring…blood would have made it better."

Ady smiled a little and caught Gru's gaze as he straightened and returned it apprehensively.

The girls were beckoned over by the ballet teacher to help clean up the decorations and return the special recital outfits and head pieces, which were slightly more expensive then the regular tutus and tights they wore.

XXX

The dance instructor clapped her hands together happily as the group of girls clustered around her. Her tight bun caused brief veins to pop up on her forehead.

"I thought that went well, a few issues but we definitely improved, so well done ladies…and Richard," she added to the luckless boy who had been recruited to play the prince. "If your parents say it's all right we'll head over to Haggles as a group for pizza. Will you girls be joining us?" The teacher added to Margo, Edith and Agnes as the rest of the children scattered off to ask their parents. Usually after a recital the dance class went out for dinner or ice cream or something. They never had gone with them because they were always expected to return to Miss Hatties…or on the previous occasion, because they had been kidnapped by Vector.

"Um…maybe," she said while eyeing her sisters. They had changed back into their casual clothing. "I don't know if my dad would like that."

"Well let me know before we leave," the woman said before flouncing off.

"You guys want to get pizza?" Margo asked.

"Dad won't want to go." Edith said drearily.

"We can ask." Margo said. She looked around the corner of one of the large cardboard flowers at her father and Ady standing over by the door. Ady had her hands in her pockets and looked as if she were occasionally trying to stub out an invisible cigarette under her sandals. Gru had his hands folded behind his back and was massaging his fingers awkwardly. They were both avoiding making eye contact for any length of time. Margo smiled a little.

"Do you think dad likes Ady?" Margo asked.

"They hate each other don't they?" Edith said with a lack of interest. In her experience most adults didn't threaten to kill each other if they liked one another, although in her opinion most adults were frankly, mad. If she liked someone she'd be much more inclined to punch them then to kiss them.

Margo was slightly more astute to the adult world then her sister and therefore had noticed a few things that had probably gone over her and Agnes' head. For instance, a few days prior, on one of the mornings when Gru and Nefario were going to work in the lab, her father had made them pancakes for breakfast and at Edith's insistence was showing off by flipping them on the pans. At some point she let Ady into the house when she arrived and the woman had stood in the kitchen door watching her father amusedly until he noticed her and promptly dropped the pancakes and burned himself.

He seemed to get inexplicably clumsy around Ady and a lot less sure of himself. At the moment he was giving off the impression of exceptionally awkwardness although part of that might have been the clothes. He was wearing them like some people might wear an itchy sweater.

"I'm not so sure." Margo said. The other two girls looked over at Gru and Ady. Agnes squinted, perhaps trying to see what Margo had apparently already seen.

"If dad likes Ady…does that mean he'll stop spending time with the scary lady?" Agnes asked.

"Maybe..." Margo said hopefully.

"But she hates him, right?" Edith said. Margo shrugged. They stood in silence for a moment.

"I dunno..."

XXX

"So, you actually do own clothing without G's all over them then?" Ady said breaking what had been a very uncomfortable silence. Gru gave her a blank look before flicking one of the buttons on the shirt. She raised her eyebrow and leaned in close enough to see the tiny Gs carved in the silver buttons. Gru held his breath as she ran her finger over one of them amusedly.

"So do you buy the clothes and then add the Gs, or is there some place you can send off for monogrammed stuff?"

"Usually…Dr. Nefario…adds dem." He said, while clearing his throat slightly.

"Ah, so he's a tailor too, huh?"

Gru was relieved when Margo, Edith and Agnes approached.

"Are you gurls ready?" He said wearily. He was looking forward to getting out of the clothes. The jeans were too tight and were beginning to chafe. He'd not worn them enough to break them in so the fabric was still stiff and he felt uncomfortable in the button up shirt without his turtleneck and scarf, or for that matter any of his weapons.

"Uh, we were actually wondering if we could go with the class to get pizza at Haggles." Gru frowned a little. "We never got to go back when we lived at the orphanage."

"You wouldn't rather just…order peeza…or make eet?" He asked desperately while casting a look of loathing at the parents still clustered around the studio.

"No," Agnes said cheerfully.

"You wanna come?" Margo added to Ady.

"Leave me out of this, Margo. I've had enough soccer mom company for one day." Ady replied.

"Please, I'll let you hold my unicorn." Agnes said, while holding the small toy up as if it were a tempting bribe. Ady cleared her throat in the face of Agnes' huge expectant eyes.

"As appealing as that sounds…uh…seeing as you're dad's here…I wouldn't want to interrupt, you know…family time." She said playing on the certainty that Gru probably didn't want her there in the first place.

"We don't mind." Margo said. "Is it okay if she comes dad?" Gru was shaken out of whatever gloomy and violent thoughts he was having while watching a group of women on the other side of the room who had started chattering loudly after having caught his eye.

"Huh? Oh…" he looked at Ady. "Er…I don't think…uh…dat ees okay, I guess." he said finally.

"Great, afterwards we can give you a ride home, that way you don't have to take a cab." Margo said with a smile while Ady raised her eyebrows at Gru.

XXX

Haggles was worse on a Saturday evening then it was on a Thursday afternoon. Not only was the entire ballet class there as well as the parents but there was a group of little girls in softball uniforms, as well as some grubby boys in baseball uniforms some of them hitting each other over the head with their gloves or eating their pizza messily and staining their uniforms as well as several other families. There was even a birthday party in one corner. The birthday girl had a cake in front of her and was wailing at the top of her lungs while a couple Haggles employees sang to her uneasily.

Gru had retrieved his jacket out of the car, mainly for the comforting weight of the weapons in all of the inner pockets and considered it an amazing feat of willpower that he hadn't shot someone within a few moments of walking in the door, particularly considering the fact that upon doing so the class was approached by a large mascot which got dangerously close to him and then had been bright enough to back off after seeing his expression.

"You know…" Ady said in a low voice as they followed the class to a couple of empty booths. "I was really kind of counting on you to not let me come along,"

"I do not want to be here either. Consider eet an attempt to spread de misery." He said gloomily while looking at her out of the corner of his eye.

They were seated in three booths. The children were in one and the parents who had chosen to come were in the other two. Gru was sitting at the edge of one of the seats with his fist clenched vaguely, trying to ignore the noise. Ady was sitting across from him leaning on one elbow.

She made a sound of disgust as a child in the booth behind them leaned over her seat to shout something to her mother and spilled fruit punch down the back of her neck. Ady removed her sweatshirt with a growl and set it aside before running a frustrated hand through her hair.

"This has to be some undiscovered circle of hell." She said while rubbing the back of her neck.

"Oh Mr. Gru…" said a gratingly cheerful voice, getting both Gru and Ady's attention. One of the mothers approached them. Ady recognized her vaguely as the woman who had spoken to her on the first occasion she'd taken the girls to dance class. "So glad you could make it to the recital this time," she said optimistically while absently patting her dark hair with one stubby hand. He had taken a slightly defensive position when she approached him and was now watching her wearily.

"I thought the children did well…shame about your daughter stepping on Charlotte's daughter's foot, but I think her daughter is a bit of a clutz anyways to be honest." He didn't answer and his expression probably could have frozen water.

"Anyways, some of the other parents are going out for a drink if you want to join us? You know since this place really is for children. There's a bar nearby." There was a slight hopeful tone in her voice.

"No." Gru replied.

"Oh, are you sure?" she said disappointingly. Ady was watching the exchange amusedly. The woman was wearing a blouse covered in colorful flowers and she'd purposefully unbuttoned the top three buttons.

"Very."

"Oh…well…okay…it's the place called Chutneys, right down the street if you change your mind." After the woman left Gru massaged his temples wearily.

"Why do dey insist on talking to me." He cast Ady an annoyed look when he caught the start of a laugh from her.

"You are right, I should not 'ave let you come." He frowned as he heard his cell phone ringing from inside his coat. Gru picked it up and started searching through the various new pockets Nefario had put in it before he found the phone. The mother of one of the girls at the recital was sitting next to him and got an eyeful of various other things he pulled out of his pockets before the phone, including a tazer, a set of lock picks and what looked like a small explosive. He glared at her and she turned away quickly.

Gru flipped his phone open, eyed the picture of Nefario in his swim trunks with a sigh, considered not answering it and then pressed the button.

"Yeah." Gru said while putting his finger in the ear not covered by the phone to drown out some of the sound. "Now ees not a good time for dis, Dr. Nefario. I can't…all right, hold on. I will be right back." Gru said as he straightened.

After he left Ady felt a vague tug on her pant leg at the knee. She looked down at Agnes and Margo who had followed her over.

"Hmm?" Ady said. Agnes made a tiny puffing sound then indicated for the woman to lean down so she could whisper something to her. Ady did so. After a moment Ady straightened a little and raised her eyebrow at Margo.

"The instructor said we had to ask an adult because the bathrooms are outside and there's a key." She said with a shrug.

"You can't wait for your dad to come back?" She asked the little girl who shook her head vigorously. "All right." Ady said as she straightened and took Agnes' hand.

"If you ask for the key, I can take her." Margo said.

"That's okay, just let your dad know when he gets back." Ady said.

XXX

Ady leaned against the stone wall outside the girl's restroom with a sigh. It was very humid outside, the special sort of humid where the air felt solid and which threatened a hell of a summer storm later on.

She could see the bar; Chutney's across the street. It was one of those bland stone buildings with small windows that almost resembled the exterior of a truck stop restroom but probably smelled like smoke instead of disinfectant. Off to the right she could also see the entrance to the man made beach. Because of the way the wind was blowing and probably in part because of the heat as well the slightly rank smell of the water carried over. It was not a particularly classy area.

Ady was musing over the fact that, despite this, the girls had still been allowed to wander around by themselves before they were adopted. She scowled a little. It was hard to imagine how anyone would allow someone like, say, Agnes wander around by herself in a bad area. There had to be a special kind of curse word for a person like that.

She was brought out of her thoughts when one of the giant mascots from the pizza place made his way out of the building. He took the costume head off, a giant rat head and lit a cigarette. Why a pizza place, or any food place for that matter, would want a giant rat as a mascot was a mystery.

After a while the smoking man noticed her and gave her a slightly toothy smile while nodding his head. Ady slid down the wall a little in the opposite direction.

"Hey, not often I see gals your age in this place." He said after having closed the distance. "It's usually middle ages women. I'm on break, how about getting a drink?"

"Ugh. No thanks, I'm not into giant vermin." Ady said while moving away again.

"Hey come on, I can try to make you smile."

"Go away or I'll make you bleed." Ady said.

"I like feisty women." He said while leaning in a little.

"I'm not kidding rat, unless you want to spend the rest of the night walking funny, get away from me." Ady said while leaning away from the cigarette smoke.

"That sounds promising." He said while attempting to put his arm around her. She elbowed him hard in the stomach.

"Hey! Jeez!" He wheezed back.

"Next time it'll be lower." A tiny knocking sound on the bathroom door distracted her.

"I can't reach the knob." Agnes said from inside. Ady opened it and the little girl came out trying to latch the button on her overalls. "This one always is really hard, Margo usually does it for me." She added while sticking her tongue out slightly in the effort to get the strap buttoned. Ady smiled a little and leaned down to do the little girls button.

The man in the rat costume behind her had gotten his breath back. He flicked away his cigarette and grabbed her arm.

"Well now you owe it to me after that."

"Hey! I said no!" She started as she grabbed at his wrist to pull his hand off of her.

It was at this point that Gru surfaced from the pizza place, his hands folded behind his back. His eyes fell on the man in the rat suit and Ady and his expression hardened.

The man found himself yanked off her with force and he stumbled a little.

"Ees dere a problem here?" Gru said in tones that a smart person would have steered clear of.

"Hey, stay out of this old man, it's none of your business." Gru pulled the young man up by his collar so that he was slightly off of the ground and close enough to the villains face so he could get the full effect of his expression.

"Leestin you leetle punk, unless you weesh to regret de day ove your birth, I suggest you leave." He said in a low voice before letting go so that the guy stumbled and lost his footing, already slightly wobbly in the big costume.

Gru headed over to Ady and his daughter. Ady's eyebrows twitched up a little.

"Thanks..." She said, a little bewilderedly. He cleared his throat.

"Are you…ready to go back inside?" He said out of vague embarrassment.

"Was that mouse attacking you?" Agnes asked worriedly as Ady finished clipping her button and straightened.

"Nah, worse, he was trying to date me."

"Hey," The guy in the costume said while struggling to his feet with some difficulty due tot eh bulk of the outfit. "You want a fight, you've got it, buddy." He said to Gru, who gave him a weary look.

"Just forget it." Ady said vaguely while grabbing Agnes' hand and indicating the door back into Haggles. "It'd only get us kicked out."

"So that's why you didn't take me up on my offer huh, you're into old and bald," the guy said, attempting death. "Tell me, buddy, do those freckles go all the way down?"

"All right, dat's eet." Gru said, turning away from Ady and his daughter.

As he approached the guy, who was sneering at him he automatically reached for one of the weapons tucked in his coat. Then he remembered that he was wearing the plaid shirt and that he left his coat inside the pizza place. That brief moment of confusion gave the guy long enough pause to punch Gru in the mouth.

"Hey!" Ady said as she started forward. Gru waved her back with some frustration as he ran his tongue over the cut in his lip.

"You want some more old man?" The guy said, sneering.

"Dat…was a meestake." Gru said.

XXX

About twenty minutes later he was sitting on the edge of the curb outside of Haggles broodingly with his coat beside him. Ady and the girls approached him.

"Well, they're not going to call the cops, I guess that guy has caused problems before." Ady said, "but your not allowed to set foot in the restaurant again."

"Well dat ees a real shame." He said bitterly.

"If you want to go home now, it's okay." Margo said while casting a brief look at her sisters. He looked at her and his expression softened.

"No, go ahead and 'ave your peeza. I will wait out here." Margo looked between him and Ady and a thought occurred to her.

"Well, why don't you and Ady go somewhere else to eat?"

"What?" Ady started, her attention suddenly on Margo.

"Sure, there are plenty of parents chaperoning, you don't really have to be here. You can meet us back here in an hour or so."

"Um…I don't theenk so, Margo." Gru said while coloring slightly.

"Why? Do you want to eat here?" Margo asked Ady, who raised her eyebrow.

"Not really…" she said as her eyes flickered briefly to Gru. "There's a diner down on the beach, foods not too bad there," she added with a shrug. Gru eyed her uncomfortably. He cleared his throat.

"Okay." He said weakly.

"All right, I'll go get my sweatshirt." She said while indicating Haggles. When she was out of earshot he turned a desperate gaze on Margo.

"Why would you do dat?" He asked.

"Do what?" Margo said innocently.

"You know what. I cannot go somewhere to…eat weeth hor."

"Why not?" Margo asked amusedly.

"Because…I can't…I mean…dat ees de sort of theeng you do…on a date and…she…and I…and Dr. Nefario…"

"What does uncle Nefario have to do with anything?" Edith asked a little bewilderedly.

"Dating sounds really confusing." Agnes added.

"Look, Eet ees just a bad idea and…I would not even know what to do in dat sort ove situation."

"Relax dad. I'm sure you'll do fine, just, you know be yourself…" He raised his eyebrow.

"Dat ees terrible advice!"

"Well I wouldn't like, shoot anyone..." Margo conceded after a moment.

"I think you're supposed to kiss her." Agnes confidently. Gru went bright red and a look of horror crossed his face.

"Least that's what grownups in movies do when they're on a date."

"Oh…no no no." He said as he stood and ran a hand over his face.

"Why are you so afraid? It's not like she has bombs on her." Edith said.

"I am not afraid!" Gru said.

"Kay, got it." Ady said from behind him as she returned. He started and then glared at Margo who was smiling amusedly. Ady gave him a strange look.

"You ready?"

"Uh, so…eet seems." Gru said while looking doubtingly at his daughters.

"We'll call you when we're done." Margo said with a smile as she urged her sisters back towards the pizza place.

XXX

The walk down to the diner was an awkward one. Gru had his coat slung over one shoulder. His other hand was stuffed in his jean pocket. He looked sideways at Ady, was tying her sweatshirt around her waist.

He was trying to remember when the last time was that he'd had dinner out with a woman, not counting his mother. It had definitely been a while. When it finally came to him he winced a little and made an attempt to forget.

The diner was called Figg's. It was the sort of place that hung up Norman Rockwell paintings and old records and had a picture of Elvis on the Boy's restroom and Marilyn Monroe on the Girl's and was usually empty. Depending on one's taste it was either a quaint and comfortable place to eat or it was a miserable hovel.

Even though it was a Saturday night it was empty now apart from an old couple in the corner. Gru eyed the inside bitterly.

"You want to sit at the counter or one of the tables?" Ady asked while crossing her arms awkwardly.

"How about at a another restaurant." He mumbled.

"This is a man made beach Gru, you'll be lucky to get a place where the cooks wear hairnets and wash their hands." She said, while pulling at his sleeve. "We'll sit at a table." He followed her awkwardly.

A waitress several years past her prime put down a few badly laminated menus after taking their drink order. They both got coffee, although if the drink selection had been better Gru might've preferred something with alcohol. He opened the menu and looked at the food selection with a grimace.

"You like dis crap?"

"Yep. You have to admit it's better then Haggles."

"A hot dog stand ees better den Haggles." He said as he turned one of the laminated pages.

"Well at least it's not crowded."

"You theenk not 'aving customers ees a point een eets favor?" Ady gave him a slightly irritated look before taking a drink of her coffee.

"Do you like anything normal? Or does everything have to either explode or be expensive?" He cast her a cynical look, but she wasn't looking at him. She was staring down at her menu with a vaguely stormy expression. Gru looked back down with some unease, feeling as if he was missing something in the conversation that was fairly important, but for the life of him he didn't know what it was.

He cast a couple of furtive looks at her as she leaned her head in her palm, her red hair poking through her fingers as she absently pealed off the lamination at the corner of the menu with her other hand while apparently reading the supper page.

"Let's just get some appetizers…" She said after a while as she closed the menu. "If we get a bunch of sides maybe you'll like one of them," she added.

XXX

Everything was fried. Fried potato skins with cheese, fried green tomatoes, fried mushrooms, fried pickles, fried onion rings. If it wasn't fried and covered in grease Figg's apparently wanted nothing to do with it.

"Dis ees not a mushroom." Gru said vaguely while trying to take a bite of it and making a vague sound of annoyance when the mushroom fell out of the breaded cover.

"It may taste more like one if you actually get it in your mouth." She pointed out amusedly while taking a sip of coffee.

"What ees a fried green tomato?" He said suspiciously while eyeing something that looked like crusty disks with patches of green showing through the friend bread.

"I think they're just tomatoes that are taken off the vine before they're ripe. They're good…kinda sour."

"Who comes up weeth dis food…and why do dey theenk eet ees a good idea to try eet." He said while picking up a pickle and scowling.

"Well who decided caviar and snails and lobster was a good idea? At least this stuff didn't start out squirming or with too many legs when they thought about it." Gru didn't say anything. He didn't say anything. He hated caviar and escargot and had never really been crazy about lobster either.

"You want something for dessert?" Ady asked while leaning on her elbows. He tried not to look at her shoulders and chest covered in a multitude of freckles.

"Ees eet all fried too?" He said cynically. She shrugged and pulled a dessert menu out of a holder sitting on the table.

"Well…they have fried ice cream."

"I theenk I will pass." He said.

After they were finished eating and had left the diner Gru checked his cell phone. No call from the girls although he did notice, with some dismay that he did have quite a few from Nefario. The first call had been to enquire as to when Gru would be returning, and, Gru suspected to check on him in regards to Ady.

He closed his phone and tucked it back in his pocket.

"Looks like it's about to rain." Ady said. The beach, admittedly sad, stretched out dully. The sand was a grayish color because of the overcast sky and the heat was thick and stifling. He looked at her out of the corner of his eye.

"So…what now, are we heading back to Haggles?" She asked.

"De gurls 'ave not called yet." Gru said with a grunt as he sat down on the edge of a patio attached to the back of Figg's. It went down into the sand and was covered with the stuff. The restaurant had had wooden floors, probably to make cleaning up all of the sand easier.

He carefully rolled up his sleeves. He was feeling tired, probably due to the heat and the greasy food, not to mention the early wake up call involving a metal explosive crawling up his chest. Gru grimaced a little when he thought of this.

"I could use a cup ove coffee dat has not been on de pot all day." He said as he rubbed at his eyes.

"There's a café down there." She said, indicating a building down the stretch of the beach. "I've never been inside, but I have a friend who works there."

XXX

After the first few steps down the coast in which Gru had attempted to keep his shoes and socks on, they filled up with sand, and grimacing Gru was forced to kicked off the dress shoes and shed the socks. After shaking them out he continued on, barefoot. It was difficult to walk comfortably on sand, which tended to shift and swell in unexpected places.

When they neared The Hideaway, they climbed over a small makeshift concrete divider separating a parking lot from the beach and pushed open the glass doors into the air-conditioned building.

"All right, well let's…oh crap I forgot she worked tonight."

"What?" Gru said. "Hey!" He added as she yanked him back out of sight from the counter and into a small hall, which contained the bathrooms.

"That girl at the register used to work with me down at the Coffee Shop. If she sees you, she's probably going to call the cops." Ady said.

"So?" Gru started. "I am not particularly concerned weeth dat." He added as he took his coat from off of his shoulder and started to untangle one of the weapons. He caught Ady's expression.

"I am not goeeng to shoot hor, I will just threaten hor a leetle." This did not seem to help much.

"Put the gun away Gru." She said while rubbing at her forehead.

"What?"

"Would you just…just go wait outside? I'll get the coffee." She said with a sigh.

After ensuring that Gru had left the café without Vanessa noticing Ady headed to the counter and smiled a little when the young woman looked up.

"Hey Ady, I thought you were busy tonight. Going to some kids play or something," she said brightly.

"Yeah, it's over. Just killing time right now. Weren't you going out with the guys tonight?"

"I took a later shift. Steve's okay but I didn't really feel like going out with Ronnie and Dillon if you weren't coming. No offense."

"Nah it's okay." Ady said with a shrug.

"So you like babysitting?"

"Yeah, it's…not bad."

"I have to admit I'm kind of surprised. I'm kind of sick of hearing Dillon whining about it every time he drops by or I see him at a club, but I really didn't expect you stick with it."

"Uh…yeah…look, can I get a couple of coffees?"

"Sure…I don't think you're supposed to give coffee to kids though Ady."

"It's for their dad. The girl's are eating pizza with their ballet class."

"Oh…okay then. You're…hanging out with their dad?"

"Were waiting for them to finish up."

"And getting coffee?"

"Yeah…"

"Is that normal?"

XXX

"Here." She said as she left the coffee shop and approached Gru, handing over the coffee. He was standing near a row of parking meters up at the front of the parking lot. There were a row of cars parked at them, belonging to people who were willing to pay in order for the convenience of not walking the few extra steps from the free spots. He had something in his hand that looked like a small remote and was playing with the buttons absently.

"What are you doing?" She asked anxiously.

"Testing sometheeng," he said as he took the coffee and pressed a button. "Here watch dis." Ady watched wearily as the amount on one of the meters went down to zero. He grinned. There was a slightly wicked edge to it.

"You…have something specifically for doing that?"

"Eet also works on a number ove other theengs." He said as he focused on another one. He happened to look up at Ady who was giving him a strange look, which seemed both unsettled and disapproving.

"What?" He said as the other meter went down to zero.

"Stop that!" Ady said while grabbing his arm and pulling him back towards the beach. "You're so…embarrassing."

Gru tucked the item into his coat after she let go of his arm. He slung the jacket back over his shoulder again and they walked on in silence. After a while he looked sideways at her. Her face was stormy. He looked away, feeling slightly puzzled and slightly annoyed for a variety of reasons, one being that he was feeling self-conscious again and he wasn't sure why.

As a villain he had assumed a certain style and habits. One was expected to eat expensive foods off of expensive plates because any decent worthwhile villain knew that if you didn't have style you might as well be picking pockets in an alley somewhere.

He shouldn't be eating in diners, he shouldn't be trying to figure out where the mushroom was in a breaded fried mushroom or drinking coffee that had very clearly been left on the pot all day or sitting on a booth with a spring that kept sticking him in the back, in jeans that didn't fit right.

Gru thought all of this as they walked back in the gray sand. Nefario was right, he absolutely should not be here with this girl with her red hair, always slightly messy and so many freckles that they queued and she should not be able to make him feel so…awkward.

Polina had style, so much that she practically oozed with it. She was a woman who absolutely understood the importance of image in villainy. She wouldn't be caught dead in a diner. She'd never walk down a gray cigarette littered beach or drink instant coffee.

Gru drew his eyebrows together a little and then sighed heavily, mainly because it occurred to him that villains weren't supposed to eat stuffed crust pizza or have picnics or tea parties either. He didn't want Polina. He shouldn't want Ady. It wasn't fair.

"Grilled cheese sandwiches." He said before clearing his throat, aware that it was a stupid sounding sentence all by itself.

"What?" Ady said, in the same opinion.

"You asked eef I like anytheeng normal. I like grilled cheese sandwiches." He added in a mumble.

"Why grilled cheese sandwiches?" She asked. He shifted uncomfortably.

"My mom made dem once…when I was sick…with soup…she deed not usually do dat." Ady gave him a slightly puzzled smile that caused his stomach to do a brief somersault and he looked away uncomfortably.

"You wanna sit? Kinda hard to drink while were walking…especially on sand." Ady said after a while.

"On de beach?" He asked while eyeing a cigarette butt dismally.

"Yeah, sure, why not?" She said as she dropped her sandals and untied her sweatshirt so that she could sit on it. After a moment he sat down as well, once again looking slightly out of place. He set his shoes aside.

"How's your mouth?" Ady asked after a while. He had been going over the laceration with his tongue again without thinking.

"Eets ees fine." He answered, it had stung rather badly while he had been eating, possibly because of the grease, it was now down to a dull throb. "Eet was not a good punch." he added.

"He had kind of a glass jaw too." Ady said. Gru nodded. "I don't think you have to worry about those women talking to you again anyways, I think they'll probably avoid you from now on."

"Oh, I hope so." He said with a sigh.

"Out of curiousity, how does someone get as psychotic as you? I mean…is it like a hobby you pick up in college or as a child were you just…like this." Gru raised his eyebrow.

"Eet ees not a hobby. Eet ees just...how I am." He said uncomfortably. There was that silence again, this time filled up with the sound of the waves.

"Thanks...by the way." She added.

"You are welcome." He said cautiously.

"Why did you do it?" She asked, her voice was uncharacteristically timid. She had grown very used to defending herself over the years. She was not used to someone else doing it. He shrugged a little.

"Because I am completely psychotic apparently and when I was a child I was not like dis. I wanted to be an astronaut." He said as he traced his finger over the top of his coffee cup, which he'd sat in the sand beside him.

"An astronaut? Really?" She asked, amused.

"Ever since I watched de live footage ove de moon landing." He said, nodding. "I used to wear a box on my head wid part ove eet cut out to look like a helmet."

"You wore a box on your head? So…you got beat up a lot around that time then?" He eyed her amused expression and scowled a little.

"I only wore eet once to school." He said darkly.

"So how do you go from that to…you?" He shrugged.

"My mother was not very…supportive…ove dat. Well she still isn't." He added. He'd grown up knowing that he could never be an astronaut. He wasn't the right type. He had been a little heavy and short and his arms and legs had been thin and he had girly hands and he got beaten up a lot. You couldn't become an astronaut like that. At some point he'd become resentful enough of the whole thing that he'd decided that he'd get to the moon a different way…and then he'd take it for himself.

"Yeah, mine wasn't either." Ady said."I always got the impression she wished I was someone else."

"Your mother cannot be worse den mine." Gru said with a sigh. She considered this.

"Mine had me enrolled in three different day cares to keep me out of the house."

"On de forst day ove school every year my mother curled my hair." Gru said. Ady snorted and then tried to stifle her laughter when he scowled at her.

"Sorry, I just…pictured you in curls." She said. "My mom made me wear these ugly dresses with all of this lace and stuff because she said I was too boyish and she thought it would keep me from fighting. I wound up getting in more fights because people made fun of the dresses."

"For my birthday every year, instead ove a cake my mother made me dese horrible leetle quiches. After a while I could not even look at one weethout getting sick."

"I hate quiche." Ady said.

"Yeah me too." She smiled at him making him feel slightly dizzy again. After a while he smile faded a little.

"I don't even talk to my mom anymore," she sighed. "She moved when I went off to college. Her new husband doesn't want me up there. We really don't get along. Occasionally I get phone calls, but her numbers unlisted. That's probably more my fault though…"

"I wish mine deed not talk to me." He said with a sigh.

They were both quiet for a little while. During this time Ady was trying to work something out.

"The moon landing…that was in…the 60's right?" She said after a while.

"Yes…" Gru said cautiously. "Why?"

"I'm trying to work out how old you are." Gru frowned.

"Please don't," he said wearily.

"So...if the moon landing was in the sixties...and you were young enough to wear a box on your head then...what...forty something?"

"I am not playeeng dis game."

"So...older?" Gru sighed. "Let's see...if, say, you were six or seven...I think the moon langing was in '68 or '69..."

"Eet was '69" Gru said while rubbing at his temple.

"So...what forty five?"

"Nice try...but I was nine when I saw de moon landing."

"Ah. So when's your birthday?"

"Semptember."

"Kay, I'll be sure to make you a cake." She said as she looked down at her feet and ran sand through her toes. "Course it'll probably be inedible."

"Undoubtedly." He said, although he was absurdly touched by this in a strange way. "I will...hold you to dat," he added.

She looked up at him and smiled a little. There was a low rumbling in the distance.

"We should probably head back before it starts pouring." She said with perhaps bit of reluctance. He nodded vaguely and straightened. While they walked back across the beach he grimaced as he kicked a candy wrapper that had stuck to the bottom of his foot.

"Personally, I do not see de attraction ove walking barefoot on de beach."

"I kinda like it." She said. "You ever stand on the edge of the tide." Gru shrugged indifferently.

"I do not spend a lot ove time on de beach." She eyed his pale features.

"You surprise me." She said with a cynical smile before grabbing at his wrist. "Come on." She added, taking the few steps to the edge of the tide where the slightly bothered waves touched the shore like lapping dogs in the rising wind.

"What are you doeeng?" He asked nervously. He made a vaguely disgusted sound when the water ran over his feet and the bottom of his jeans.

"Dees water smells like sometheeng crawled up and died een eet." He said.

"Stop complaining and stand still." She said. He sighed and did so, while eyeing her hand, still wrapped around his wrist. Whenever the wave washed over his feet it took some of the sand from underneath when it returned to the water. It was a strange feeling.

"Kinda feels like the grounds slipping from under you huh?"

She looked up and her smile faded a little. He was watching her with a strange look on his face.

"Eet does." He said distantly as he felt a raindrop hit the side of his hand.

"Aw crap." Ady said as a steady rain began to fall. She started to break away from him and was about to say something else but the words died in her throat because he took hold of her hand, halting her. She turned and gave him a slightly startled look. This shifted into uneasiness as he closed the distance again.

"Gru…what…"

"Please do not hit me," he said before leaning in hesitantly. Her eyes widened a little and she met his gaze with slight bewilderment, heat rising to her face.

It wasn't a good kissing beach. The water was foul, the sand was gray and littered with rubbish and it began to rain, and not lightly either; great big chunks of rain that ensured that anything caught in it was completely soaked within seconds. It was clumsy and awkward and Gru's busted lip stung against hers. There was no style to it whatsoever.

It was still a good kiss.

XXX

Edit: Actually changed the last bit a lot. Started having doubts about it. Seems to happen a lot. Hopefully too many people didn't read it before I changed it. *end edit*

Phew, Okay I have had a lot of problems with this chapter over the last couple of days…so I really hope it worked out all right. Fortunately I've been on Spring break and have had a lot of free time to pick at it.

So, I'm thinking that we have three chapters left. Maybe two but I'm almost certain it's going to be three. Thanks for the reviews and I hope you all have a nice evening.

Panda-Babii: Thanks ^^ I'm glad you liked it and hopefully this chapter did not disappoint.

Eleta: Thank you : ) I'm glad you like it and thank you for the compliment! I've actually wanted to be a writer since I was real young making books out of my dad's recycled office paper…so yes, I have thought about it. ^^ I am pleased to hear that my writing is turning out all right. Thanks for the review!

Kaava: Sorry I didn't respond directly. I have a habit of looking at these when I'm on my way out of the house and then I forget to get back to them. Hopefully this chapter was more satisfactory in the fluff department and did not disappoint. ^^ I do have a tendency to take my time. I guess I like to put a lot of time into the chase. Thank you for the review. ^^


	20. The Trouble With Chocolate Chip Cookies

Okay just to let some of you know. After posting the last chapter I made a few changes to it. It was only a few hours after I posted it so for the most art this statement does not apply, but some of you had already read the chapter before the changes were made. So, if anything seems off in this chapter, go back and read the last few paragraphs in Chapter 18. I don't do this a lot, but occasionally if I'm unsure about things they'll eat away at me until I do some editing.

Chapter 19:

Some trouble concerning chocolate chip cookies

It wasn't a long kiss. Gru only dared to linger for a moment. Because of the rain and the wind the foul beach water had come up to their ankles, and had eaten away at the sand beneath their feet. This ensured that they were standing in about two inches of muck. As unpleasant as this was, he would have gladly withstood it for a little longer if he thought he could linger for a few more moments.

When he withdrew Ady's expression turned from outright shock to bewilderment. She could practically feel her heart pounding in her eardrums and despite the cold rain her face was burning. She ran a number of questions, phrases and actions through her head as she thought about how she was supposed to respond to the situation. After a moment when none of them seemed to come close to expressing her confused feelings she settled for the most blatantly obvious statement that she could think of.

"You kissed me."

"Dis does seem to be de case." Gru said with some embarrassment.

"Why did you do that?" She asked as she carefully removed her hand from his and ran it through her now soaked hair in a single nervous motion.

"Uh, dat ees a little deeficult to explain," he replied while rubbing at his arm in discomfort.

"Well…what were you…I mean…uh," She muttered. Before anything coherent could be said, Gru's phone rang, breaking up the moment of tension, which would have involved a lot of foot shuffling if their feet weren't glued down by the wet sand. Gru pulled his phone out of his back pocket and eyed it wearily. It was Dr. Nefario again. He sighed heavily.

"Could you geeve me…jus' one second." He said as he flipped the phone open and stepped out of tide, his feet coming free with a faint squelch. "You 'ave de worst timing." Gru mumbled, grimacing as he walked a few steps and the beach sand clung to his feet and the bottom of his jeans.

Ady watched him for a moment before stepping out of the tide herself. She had reached the point where she was soaked enough so that further exposure to the rain made little to no difference. Besides, her mind was buzzing with a variety of bewildered thoughts. The rain was the least of her concerns.

A little over a week before he'd threatened to blow up her house…this was what was going through he head right now. Granted, things seemed to have improved since then, but how did a person go from that…to this.

She approached Gru awkwardly, catching his remark into the phone, which he delivered at something of a hiss.

"_I do not know what a twist ees, and I am not certain what woo ees and how you pitch it. Stop using 30's slang. I 'ave no idea what you are talking about_."

"Uh we should…probably head back...Gru." Ady said while rubbing at the back of her neck and interrupting what seemed to be an argument although it would be difficult to say precisely what it was about. He looked up from his call as Ady turned back towards the pizza place, stuffing her hands in her pockets.

"Look, I am not having dis conversation weeth you right now. I will talk to you lator." He said before hanging up and hurrying after her as she started up the beach.

Ady looked sideways at Gru as they walked, looking down again with some discomfort when he met her gaze. He had his hand behind his back and was running a well-manicured thumb over his other fingers absently. After a while he cleared his throat.

"Uh…would you…like to…come back to de house…for a bit?" Gru was aware that inviting her over would cause further trouble for himself, but at this point he was so far out of his depth he figured it didn't matter. He sounded uncharacteristically nervous

Ady paused in the action of kicking some of the sand off of her foot. She looked at him, wearing an anxious expression.

"Erm…Gru…" she started.

"I could probably whip up a dessert…dat ees not fried…" he added in a mumble.

"Gru…I don't think…"

"And maybe I could open…"

"Gru!" she said as she halting him by grabbing his arm. "This is kinda… sudden…and a little strange. "Look, you…I don't even know what to think about you. Half of the time you're…a complete psycho waving strange guns around, threatening to blow me up, and there was the exploding cookie and the weird yellow guys, and the tank, and all of that stuff…is just what I've seen of you in the last month," she said as she untied her sweatshirt and began to wring it out. The rain had cooled things down and her arms had broken out in goosebumps.

"I do not remember threatening to blow you up…"

"…and other times," she continued, ignoring him. "You're…different. You know I kinda thought you hated me," she added.

"Yeah me too, at forst."

Gru watched her messing with her sweatshirt for a few seconds before shrugging off his jacket. Ady looked up at him, surprised as he held it out to her.

"What?"

"Eet ees not wet on de inside. Your arms are all bumpy." He added awkwardly. She took it from him after a moment of hesitation and pulled it over her shoulders. It was huge on her and she noted there was a lot of weight, as if it were stuffed with all manner of things. She resisted the urge to put her hands in the pockets on the basis that she was worried about what she'd find.

"I really need…a drink," she said vaguely as they started walking again. "And some sleep…then…maybe tomorrow when I come over to babysit we can talk about what…this is." she said while running her finger over the G on the zipper on his coat.

"Tomorrow…" he said distantly. "All right," Tomorrow was going to be a long day. He had already known that though. Tonight was going to be a long night, come to think of it.

As the pizza place came into view Gru looked at her out of the corner of his eye.

"What was een your coffee?" He asked after a moment.

"Uh…it was just coffee…with a little cinnamon. Why?" She asked apprehensively.

"I…ave de taste ove cinnamon een my mouth." Ady blushed a little and looked away. He'd tasted of black coffee, mushrooms and the slightly metallic tang associated with a cut lip. They were flavors that should have been very unappealing together, and so she was slightly troubled with the fact that this had not been the case.

XXX

It was around eight o' clock when Gru and the girls returned home. It was something of a effort to get them to bed, at least in Agnes' and Edith's case, both of whom were hyper from pizza and caffeine. Gru was, by contrast completely exhausted.

"One Big Unicorn, One Big Unicorn!" Agnes shouted while grabbing onto his arm and hanging from it. He grunted and lifted her up onto her bed.

"Why are you so heavy? All right, all right. Calm down forst, den I will read you de story." He said while attempting in vain to gently shake her loose. She laughed and increased her grip.

"Can I wear my boots in bed?" Edith said from behind him.

"No." Gru said while prying each of Agnes' tiny fingers loose.

"Aw, why not."

"Because boots are not for sleeping een."

"Can I at least have my fake blood back?"

"De last theeng I need ees to find you covered een de fake blood tomorrow. Agnes…" He stopped with a sigh. After he'd loosed one hand and moved to the other she'd grabbed hold again with the first and had wrapped her tiny legs around his arm as well. She giggled. "Besides, I am not goeeng to be geeving eet back anytime soon, not aftor what you deed at de pizza place."

"Aw, it's not my fault the people at Haggles couldn't tell the different between real blood and fake blood." Edith said while sitting on her bed and crossing her arms.

"Neverdeless, eet was not a pleasant situation to retorn to," he said crossly as Margo came to his rescue and pulled Agnes off of him.

"So, did you and Ady have fun?" Margo asked slyly after she returned to her own bed. She'd noticed that both him and Ady had acted somewhat strangely in each other's company after returning from their dinner. Well after the initial chaos caused by Edith retrieving and spilling a lot of her fake blood in the restaurant had subsided and the cops and ambulance had left. She had also noticed that Ady had been wearing his jacket.

"Eet was not…intolerable." Margo rolled her eyes.

"What does that mean?" She said with some amusement.

"Eef your idea ove fun ees greasy food, bad coffee and a beach dat smells like feet, den yes, I 'ad a blast." Gru said as he grabbed One Big Unicorn from the bookcase. Edith gave Margo a look and she shrugged as he threw some pillows down by their beds and sat down.

"Did you kiss her?" Agnes asked while leaning on his shoulder after he sat down. Gru colored slightly.

"Dat ees…none ove your concern," he said while raising the book.

"Is that yes?" Margo asked with satisfaction.

"Do you want to hear de story or not?" She smiled and got comfortable as he started the story.

Afterwards he headed towards his room and shed the casual clothing with, admittedly, some difficulty. The jeans took him a couple of tries and at end of the effort he wound up stumbling to floor. They had already fit a little tight, but the rain hadn't helped. He really couldn't see the attraction. Were they supposed to be more comfortable then dress pants? When he finally did get them off he tossed them aside with distaste and changed into his pjs before sitting on the edge of his bed with a sigh as he buttoned up the silk shirt.

He was tired, but he wasn't expecting to get a lot of sleep. Part of him wanted tomorrow to come, but not for the reasons he should have wanted it too. Every time he thought about Ady his thoughts returned to the beach and the smell of cheap shampoo and the taste of cinnamon and so many freckles and his stomach would do somersaults and his heart beat wildly and then, inevitably his thoughts would return to Polina and the Whirl Maker and the Mass Atomizer and he'd feel his heart drop into his stomach. Tomorrow was not going to be easy, regardless of how it went.

After a moment he stood and headed towards the stairs, heading down them slowly, his mind still elsewhere. Nefario was waiting for him at the bottom.

"Gru, I think we should discuss a few things before tomorrow." Gru sighed heavily.

"I am really not in de mood right now…Dr. Nefario," he said while walking in the kitchen. Nefario followed him.

"Well we aren't really going to have another chance Gru," he said as Gru pulled one of the bottles of wine from the rack by the refrigerator.

"Buh…fine." Gru said as he searched briefly through one of the drawers before pulling a corkscrew from it's depths.

"Would you like to know how things went with Miss de Molyneaux?"

"I'm already pouring myself a drink," Gru said bitterly.

"She got very heated after you left."

"I had to leave…I could not miss de recital again…"

"Yes, yes, I know. We got the technology up and running...so no harm done…well mostly…she did say she was out a henchman now."

"I only heet him with de freeze ray."

"Yes, but I guess she was dissatisfied with him for allowing himself to become frozen…well now he…isn't anymore." Gru leaned against the counter top with a sigh, looking tired as he took a drink too large to be a sip from the glass. "Anyways…incident aside she informs me that we are all set for tomorrow."

"Oh…good."

"And what about Miss Owens?" Gru looked up guiltily.

"What about hor?"

"I trust that you have informed her that her services will no longer be required." It was clear by the way he said it that he already knew the answer.

"Dat really has not come up…" Gru mumbled. He caught Nefario's expression. "Well…eet does not hort to 'ave her around…I mean…I am sure I will need a babysitter again in de future." Nefario sighed.

"You really think that she'll work for you after tomorrow? Civilians get a little…funny about the whole world domination thing." Gru nodded wearily as he took another large drink from his glass. This had occurred to him. It was why he needed to see her before he went to Polina's estate.

"I…I 'ave actually been theenking…about dat…." The doctor's face fell a little. "Perhaps… dees…whole…takeeng over de world theeng…maybe we are being a leetle hasty."

"Hasty…"

"Well…most people dey…start weeth a city forst…or a town…perhaps a small state…and work their way up from dere."

"Gru, between you and me we have…" he paused briefly and counted under his breath. "…almost ninety-five years of experience villainy. At this point, taking it slow is not really an option. I need you to tell me that you aren't seriously considering throwing away an opportunity of a lifetime because you have a bit of a crush on a girl half your age."

"What? No! Eet ees not… because ove dat…dere are a lot ove factors…dat are going eento dis… conclusion." Nefario continued to glare at him, then, after a while his stormy expression cleared a little and for a moment he looked tired. He sighed and raised his goggles to his forehead, a thing he rarely did because he'd had the lenses adjusted to his prescription and had lost his regular eyeglasses ages ago.

"Look Gru…you and I have worked together for a long time right?"

"Yes…"

"Well right now I'd like to speak with you as…an old friend instead of…you know an assistant."

"Okay…"

"You've spent years trying to be the greatest villain in the world. Now you've not done anything that has made any of the major tabloids in a while and you still use the old technology and perhaps don't have the sleek new age flash that some of these boys now have and yes, you're a little old fashioned and predictable…"

"All right…geet on with eet please."

"What I'm trying to say is, what you lacked in youth and flash you made up for in passion and dedication. You were more driven then they were. You put everything into it. So I have not regretted working for you even when all we're doing is stealing a miniature replica of the statue of liberty from Los Vegas."

"Hey, dat…was a legitimate effort …those theengs are not cheap to make you know…besides, where would I keep de full sized statue…eet would only get in de way."

"Okay, I'm just saying we haven't really got a use for it…they just sit down there. Anyways, I've worked for you because I've known that you are capable of more and this is your chance to prove it."

"But doeeng dis will not make me de best villain in de world. Eet ees Polina's plan…whatever she says, she ees een charge."

"Well, maybe its better to be on top of the world even if you are in someone else's shadow. Take it from me Gru, I should know."

"Eet ees not as eef I am proposing to geeve up villainy…"

"Do you remember Wrathful Dan, Gru?" Gru frowned.

"Was he de guy who used to train spiders to steal for him?"

"The last I heard he spends most of his time doing bad watercolors in a nursing home and stealing his neighbors mail…"

"Well he was not very bright…spiders are not by nature, very good thieves. Dis ees not de same theeng…"

"Or Sinistral. He tried to rob a pharmacy a while back and got caught by a local cop, incredibly embarrassing situation. Now he's doing community service picking up trash on the freeway and working in a soup kitchen."

"I am not goeeng to…"

"Or even my old friend Bandit." Gru sighed. "He's a little older then you yes, but he was great back in the day. One big slip up and now there are rumors going around that he can't even steal a candy bar in a grocery store or skip out on a check without getting jittery."

"All right, what ees your point!"

"If you back down from this, because of some misguided feelings which, no offense are probably the cause of some mid life crisis…well I don't want to see you wind up like one of them."

"I am not goeeng to wine up like dem." Gru said with some frustration. "Dis woman, she ees out ove her mind. I do not trust hor."

"Well…she's a villain…"

"Eet ees more den dat." Gru said, while shaking his head. "I do not theenk dat I will be een hor shadow. I theenk dat she will waste no time een geeting rid of me as soon as I am no longer valuable to hor."

Nefario frowned and for a moment seemed to be looking around the room with what might have perhaps been some guilt before turning back to his boss.

"Where's your jacket?"

"Eet ees upstairs, why?"

"Nothing, forget it." Nefario said before clearing his throat. "You know, in the old days you would have taken the risk."

"Eet ees not de old days…" Gru said. It was true. In the old days, what else had there been? Villainy was his whole life…the risk was worth it back then. Now he had…well a family…it was amazing how quickly things had changed. "Theengs are…different now." He finished awkwardly.

"Yes, so they are." Nefario said slowly, before lowering his goggles. He cleared his throat. "So what are you planning on doing Gru?"

"I do not know…"

"Well…I suppose at this point I've said all I can. I can't really threaten to quit. I'm too old to get a job with someone else and not doing this would mean either spending the rest of my time playing bingo or working at Mallwart as a greeter…and I don't really have the people skills for that. This _isn't_ just about the girl…is it Gru?"

"No, eet ees not." Nefario nodded briefly, with some skepticism before turning away from him.

"All right. Just…consider what I said. I'll be down in the lab."

When he returned to the lab he brought up the screen connected to the bug he'd placed in Gru's coat and after pounding a few keys the screen went dark apart from large letters reading; OFFLINE. That took care of that. He sat back wearily and for a moment watched a couple of minions trying to work out a complex situation in which three separate groups were attempting to navigate a small area while holding very explosive mechanisms.

After a few minutes of this he carefully shut the large heavy doors between him and them via a button in front of him and returned to his computer screen to the background sound of a massive explosion from the other room.

"We really ought to stop letting them handle that stuff," he muttered to himself. He stared at the screen for a bit before he began to type. After he'd hacked into the cookie bots the first time he'd shut down the link. He was regretting this now. He had been worried that Polina would find out. It was probably going to take all night and it might not make a bit of difference but if Gru was right well…he'd be damned if she'd use one of his inventions against them.

XXX

_ She was standing in the tide. Her feet had sunk nearly a foot into the sand._

I'm back at the beach, _she thought vaguely as she peered at the water, which was churning with the oncoming storm. It took her a moment to realize that she was looking at it though a mess of red hair in tangles down her shoulders and back. She reached up to push it out of her eyes, noting her tiny hands as she did._

_She looked down at her legs, also tiny and bare, a Band-Aid on the right knee and that was where the lace started on a particularly ugly dress in a dreadful yellow color with too many bows. She frowned and tried to lift one of her feet, which had been sort of large even back then. She'd had bigger feet then most of the boys her age. Big though they were, they didn't budge. The water rushed over and the sand swept over them again, she felt more sand move from underneath and she sank another few inches. _

_Ady grunted and grabbed at her ankle, tugging at it in the hopes that it would loose the grip, the brackish water soaked the dress and splashed up into her face. _

"_Why are you standing dere? Why don't you move?" Ady looked up, spitting out horrible tasting water as she did, into the face of the boy addressing her. It was hard to make out the specific features of people in dreams but she did notice that he was wearing a box on his head._

"_I can't…I'm stuck," she answered and watched as he edged his way down the mounds of sand. When he got closer, he reached out toward her. _

"_Eet ees just de waves, why are you so afraid?" he said._

"_I'm not afraid," she snapped back as she looked at his beckoning hand._

_She swallowed and moved her own hand from her ankle hesitantly before grasping at his splayed fingers. Another wave washed over her ankles and she sank another foot. She hissed through her teeth as the boy took another step forward, stretching his arm out as he did. She grabbed for it, this time managing to take hold and his fingers closed over hers and he pulled. Ady winced as she wrenched her feet out of the sand and crashed into him sending them both down onto the beach. _

_She raised her head and looked down into his now adult face and her own adult hand in his, although she did notice she was still wearing the ugly dress. _

"_See, eet ees not dat bad." He said softly as he brushed some of her hair out of her eyes. Before she could say anything, thunder rumbled loudly. _

It must have been real because she woke suddenly. Ady opened her eyes in the dark and eyed the fibers in the cheap couch wearily before pulling a blanket thin and worn enough so that you could see through it in some places over her shoulders with a yawn and eyeing the neon numbers on the clock on the vcr. It was 2:45 am.

She shifted so that she was lying on her back and stared up at the ceiling with a sigh.

_Gru… _Her mind brought his name up treacherously and she groaned and pulled the blanket over her head. As if he hadn't already been on her mind since earlier that evening, now she was dreaming about him.

"There's gotta be something wrong with me," she whispered in the dark room. Whatever thoughts may have come after that were interrupted when she heard a loud thud coming from the door, heavy enough so that one half of the broken chain thumped against it and the rusty bolts groaned. Ady sat up.

Her first assumption was that it was Dillon and that he'd drunk enough so that he'd forgotten how to knock properly or use doorknobs. It wasn't as if it hadn't happened before.

She pushed the blanket off of her and set her feet down on the carpet. She was wearing an oversized band t-shirt, one that nearly reached her knees and a pair of mismatched socks.

"It's not locked, Dillon. Chain's broken." She mumbled as she took a step forward and then stopped, because the door began to emit a loud groan and it might have been only her imagination but for a second it almost seemed to bow inward. Even though she had just woken up a small part of her mind brought up a logical observation.

_I don't think that's Dillon._

She managed to stumble out of the way as it blew inward, taking cover behind the couch as the wood splintered and fell in a shower in the living room. Ady watched, with horror with her hands over her ears as a copper three landed in front of her, smoking.

After a moment she peered from behind the couch. Blocking whatever meager light there might have been at that time was a massive man in a black suit. He took a step forward, having to maneuver around the doorframe, which seemed inadequate to encompass his size. He was shouldering something that looked quite lethal, but Ady didn't wait long enough to get a better look at it.

She scrambled to her feet and half staggered half ran towards her and Dillon's bedroom, cursing loudly in a series of undeterminable syllables when something crashed into the wall behind her. She pushed the bedroom door shut behind her for whatever good that did.

"The damn chain was broken. He didn't have to knock down the whole door." She hissed as she threw open the closet and after a brief search picked up a large steel bat. At one point they'd actually had a gun for protection. When she went to college she'd taken a few marksmanship courses, but after moving in with Dillon it became pretty clear that a gun in the apartment would do them more harm then good when he'd taken it out to shoot beer bottles and had accidentally shot himself in the foot. It was a good bat, but grabbing it now was more for comfort then anything.

She ran over to the window, undoing the locks and pulled the window open. As she heard another crash from the other room, she swung at the screen with the bat. It was cheap and not sealed well so it gave way pretty easily in the corners. She pushed at it and it fell out onto the air conditioner.

Ady struggled through the window just as the door to the bedroom blew open and landed clumsily on the ground, losing one of her socks, in the process which caught on the edge of the windowsill. Ady scrambling to her feet in the muck, now just plain mud with patches of grass and moss after the rain, casting a brief look at the window before heading around the building.

The problem with this particular apartment complex was that half of it was empty and the rest of it belonged to people who didn't come home very often mainly because it wasn't much to come back to. Still, she dismissed the thought of knocking on someone else's door, on the basis that she doubted it would concern someone to which a wall presented no problems and instead hurried in the direction where she knew there were a couple of small grocery stores that were open at all hours.

She got about halfway across the yard before she felt a stinging sensation on the back of her leg and shouted as she took a misstep and landed heavily on the ground, skinning her hands as she threw them out to break the fall.

She touched the area of leg where the pain had started and felt the smooth slightly wrinkled area that might be associated with a burn.

Ady grunted as she pushed herself up, grabbing the fallen bat again and peering in the direction of the apartment. She could still hear crashing from inside. Her eyes fell on a point of light between her and it. Whatever it was, it began to move toward her, whirring slightly. There was a dim glow coming from a half broken light over one of the doors, which hit the thing and she thought she saw a flash of what looked like, oddly enough, chocolate chips. She struggled to her feet and raised the bat. The cookie bot got about three feet away and then stopped. The red light started flashing on and off.

Ady shouted something that was a hybrid of a lot of different curse words and swung at it. It was a good swing and there was a satisfying crunch as the steel bat made contact. The bot hit the side of the apartment, made a few fizzling noises and there was a moment where it seemed to be unclear whether it would explode or not. Finally it fizzed a little and laid still.

Ady exhaled carefully and turned. She halted in the process of pushing some hair off of her forehead. There were tons of the little red laser points in the grass. One of them moved and a small red laser point shot across the bat hanging at her side. There was a pause before half of it fell in the grass. She raised it slightly, an expression almost of weariness.

"Oh…you've got to be kidding me." She said before everything went dark.

XXX

Gru had been right about not being able to sleep. He'd tossed and turned for most of the night. He tried to use the time to plan for the next day. He should have been preparing on how to deal with Polina if things went bad, but his mind wouldn't let him focus for long and would, inevitably turn back to Ady. His stomach would knot up then as he tried to think about what he was going to say to her the next morning. However he thought about it though, it didn't come out right in his head. He wished, distantly that he had more experience talking to women.

He'd dozed off once or twice but had been shaken awake by nightmares, generally involving being strapped in a chair, waiting to be disintegrated.

Around four o' clock he gave up on sleep. Instead he hauled himself out of bed and took a shower and dressed in his typical attire before heading down to the kitchen to make coffee.

The coffee he made was an exceptional blend from Guatemala and had excellent flavor that was spicy and rich and smoky. He'd searched in vain for something else, but the Guatemala Antigua was all he had. On this particular morning he would have preferred the instant coffee. It was strange, but there were just some mornings where really truly awful coffee sounded just right.

After his coffee was done brewing he sat down in the living room and drank it silently as outside it began to get light.

XXX

Well it's long enough to call it an Author's Note:

I'm going to get review responses out of the way first before I go into everything else. So here's my response to everyone without an account and possibly the last five or six people with an account that reviewed the story. Also, if I already responded to you and have forgotten forgive me. I've been kind of strewn about in the last couple weeks.

Blueramza: Thank you very much. I am pleased to hear that. If I ever get free time I will try to check that out. XD Well technically in a couple weeks I'll have more free time then I know what to do with.

Emochildlova: Indeed ^^ Hopefully this chapter did not dissapoint.

Wolfgrl1492: Thank you ^^ I am glad you like it, sorry it took so long to update.

ValentineRobot: Yay ^^ I hope it turned out all right then. And thank you, I'm glad you like them.

Caing88: Aww, well thanks. I'm always glad to hear when characters are IC and that people like my Oc's. I hope this chapter did not dissapoint.

Liloapril: Thanks ^^ And that is a huge compliment, that's exactly how I try to write romance. I am also pleased to hear that that is how you pictured her :)

ARandomReader: Hurray! Glad you enjoyed it. I hope this chapter didn't spoil things.

Eskie02: Thank you :) I hope this chapter turned out all right too.

Roolsilver: Aw, sorry for suspense. I can be rather evil sometimes. Thank you for the review though ^^

Jaa162: Hehehe, glad you liked it. And I'm honored to be the origin of fangirl squeals…I think. Thanks for the review ^^

Brianna: Thank you^^ I am glad you enjoyed it. Well with Polina a lot can go wrong…a lot…a…lot. Thanks for the review ^^

All right soooo as Gru would say; here's de dealio.

Firstly I apologize for the wait but I have about three weeks until graduation. I also have a job fair next week and have been getting all of my business cards, mailers, resume, website etc done so that they'll be ready before then. It's taken up most of my time.

Secondly, I'm sorry this chapter was so short but if I'd let it run longer it would have taken much much longer to finish. I've basically been constructing it a little bit at a time whenever I get a few moments. I also apologize for leaving it at, perhaps a bit of a cliffhanger but believe me, if I'd gone up to the place I was planning to it would be much worse. Better that I leave it here and then save the bulk of the climax for the next chapter then chop it off at a _really_ suspenseful moment.

Lastly, There are two chapters left, but the climax and all of that will wrap up with the next chapter. The last chapter is going to be like an afterward for lack of a better term. I guess it depends on what you consider to be the central plot point in the story. Normally I either don't have afterwards or they're very short, but in this case I'm pretty certain it'll be just as long as at least some of the other chapters.

Now, perhaps I'm jumping the gun a bit but I have been toying around with the idea of a sequel and have been for a while and I've come up with quite a few ideas and I've got the basic shape of a story forming in my mind and characters and everything. So…I figured that I would throw the thought out there and see if anyone was particularly interesting in seeing another story.

Obviously you may wait until this one is over to let me know and in the end it'll be a decision based heavily on my own desire to stop or write more, but I'll definitely take any other opinions into consideration. (Like if everyone wants me to stop, I'm not going to keep writing)

So you know… pm me or if you write regular reviews let me know in one of those and otherwise have a nice evening ^^ Love you all! Oh…and sorry for the super long authors note!


	21. I Want A Lemon Meringue

Chapter 20:

I Want A Lemon Meringue

Gru was sitting on one of the stools in the kitchen eyeing his mug bitterly and tapping his long fingers against the surface of the counter. After several minutes of this he straightened with a sigh and emptied the remainder of his cold coffee in the sink while casting a brief furtive look at the time.

The girls, meanwhile, were eating lunch. Margo watched her dad as he sat again. It was almost noon. Normally Ady was there by this time.

"Maybe she's just running late." Margo said. Gru cast her a look and then made an attempt to look as if he hadn't been concerned about the matter.

There was a whirring sound from the living room and after a few minutes Nefario appeared in the door.

"Morning Gru." Gru nodded to him absently while Margo gathered her sister's plates. Gru straightened and took them from her when she approached the sink.

"Does this mean you're not working today?" Edith asked.

"We will see. Go… go play gurls." He said wearily. Margo motioned her sisters towards the hall.

"It would appear that Miss Owens is not present." Nefario said as the girls disappeared around the corner.

"…I noticed." Gru said dismally as he turned the faucet on and rinsed the plates.

"I wonder why that is." Nefario persisted, oblivious to the hint of warning in Gru's voice.

"I don't know."

"Well…if you don't mind me saying…perhaps to a young women the attention of a fifty year old villain is not…entirely welcome."

"I…am not yet fifty and…Ees dere sometheen een particular dat you wanted…Dr. Nefario?" Gru continued in a low voice.

"I just wanted to ask you if you had any further idea of what you were going to do today."

"No."

"Well I wouldn't wait too much longer. I suspect Miss de Moleneaux is not the most patient of women." Gru opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted when the doorbell rang. He exchanged a look with the doctor.

"Oh…I hope dat ees Ady." He said below his breath as he dried his hands and headed towards the hall. It wasn't. Gry paled slightly after opening the door, and he took a step back.

Polina was dressed in a manner to impress on this occasion. She was wearing a long black dress, sleeveless, shoes with heels that would make anyone's eyes water as they imagined them going through the pad of their foot and so much fur that from a distance she might have resembled a small zoo of extinct animals. There was even a hat with peacock feathers over some exotic tails.

"Good morning, Gru. It was…getting somewhat late…I was eager to get sings moving." She said while extracting her cigarette holder from her lips, her eyes glittering. Gru swallowed.

"Uh…de uh…babysitter ees not here yet." He said weakly.

"And zis ez cause for delay? You might say we 'ave more important sings to do."

"But I…"

"I can loan you Doug for ze afternoon, if you like." Gru eyed the big man. "He ez probably an adequate nanny."

"No…I theenk…I will 'ave to decline…on dat." Nefario came up behind him, folding his hands behind his back.

"I think, on this one occasion I could possibly make an exception." He said. Polina gave him a brief smile.

"Zere, no more problem." She said with a smile. For a moment Gru looked slightly lost. "I assume your doctor Nefario will be working from your lab today zen?" Dr. Nefario nodded solemnly.

"I will leave a couple ove my henchmen to help you."

"I think we are sufficient in help. We have hundreds of minions after all."

"Yes…I ave seen zem. A bit more help, perhaps cannot hurt. Shall we get going zen?" She added, while turning to Gru.

"Uh, just geeve me one moment. I need to…get a few theengs." He said before carefully shutting the door.

"Does this mean you're going through with the plan?" Nefario asked.

"Well I don't 'ave much of a choice now do I." He hissed before pulling his phone out and heading towards the stairs. He dialed Ady's number on the way up and when he got to his room sat on the bed and waited, listening to the phone ring. After a while, when it was clear that no one was going to pick up, Gru shut his phone again and stood to look out the window, eyeing the limo sadly.

He swallowed in order to get rid of the dull pain bunching up in his throat and then took a deep breath and squared his shoulders before picking up his jacket and a belt of explosives, which he threw over one shoulder before covering them with the jacket and zipping it up so that they wouldn't be visible, and then he headed back into the hall.

XXX

Ady felt a sharp pain on the back of her head when she started to move it. She groaned and attempted to raise her hand to the place where the pain seemed to be coming from, this was accompanied by a lot of frantic whirring noises, which made her pause.

"If you move, you will die." A voice said casually from off to her right. Ady carefully lowered her hand again. After a moment she opened one of her eyes with apprehension and regretted it immediately when it met the machine gaze of one of the cookie bots. There were about a dozen others surrounding her, all motionless, but in a way that suggested alertness.

"I imagine zat zere are worse ways ove dying zen being blown to bits, but I can hardly be bozzered to sink ove zem right now." Ady tore her gaze away from the scope as the dark woman moved around so that she could see her, the click of her heels echoing slightly. When she was in view she leaned back against a long table covered in clutter and brought a cigarette to her lips, examining Ady for a moment. "I am not generally ze sort to bozzer wiz zis sort of common villainy."

Ady didn't say anything. She was still trying to figure out what was going on. Something had hit her on the back of the head. She remembered at least that much. And she remembered her apartment being destroyed by the big man with the gun.

"All ove zis ez so tired. But zen, more sophisticated methods would probably be wasted on you." she said while tapping the elegant cigarette holder on an ashtray.

The spinning in Ady's head started to settle a little and her thoughts were coming a little clearer.

"You…destroyed my apartment…you…bitch," she said hoarsely. Polina raised her perfect eyebrows and smiled a little.

"Usually I would 'ave just killed you immediately. Consider eet fortunate it was only zat heap ove rubbishz at ez en pieces…for now."

"What the…hell do you want?" Polina ignored her question. She was looking Ady up and down with something like disdain and perhaps, though it was exceedingly difficult to detect, a hint of jealousy.

"You are so…tacky." Polina said after a while. "But I suppose zere ez no accounting for taste."

Ady felt a dull anger boiling up inside her. She was afraid too, but it was hard not to be angry in the circumstances. This woman was standing in front of her acting so damn smug, she was confused and her head was pounding, she'd been forced out of bed by someone who had torn her apartment to shreds and perhaps not least she was angry because she was being threatened with a bunch of cookies with little military hats and that was just stupid.

"You're wearing a shag rug and you're calling me tacky?" Ady said haggardly. A smile crossed Polina's lips like a lizard skittering across a rock.

"Usually removing ze tongue ez a thing I do only wiz henchman, but en your case, I may endulge…just for ze pleasure of shutting you up." She brought her cigarette holder up at a swoop and caught Ady in the chin, raising her head and leaning over her so that Ady's green eyes met her dark gaze. "…I do not like competition," her voice was still soft and calm, but her eyes were stormy and filled with rage. "At least I 'ave ze curves to pull zese clothes off." Polina added softly. Ady swallowed with some difficulty.

"You look like a cross between Natasha from Rocky and bullwinkle and Cruella Deville," she said before she could stop herself.

"Kep talking. I would not hesitate to kill you now, even if it does spoil my fun." Ady could tell, as she looked into the woman's eyes, that she was telling the truth. She'd get rid of her with as much regret as someone might feel while breaking a cup. It wasn't like with Gru.

The woman pulled back, her cigarette holder withdrawn from Ady's throat. "And plez don't say somesing tiresome like Gru won't let you get away wiz zis, or just wait until he finds out, blah blah blah. I 'ave Gru, how you would say, twisted around my finger. He may 'ave his weaknesses but en ze end you cannot give him what he wants. I can."

"Yeah, what's that? Rabies?" Ady said quietly, while glaring forward.

"You see…" Polina continued, either not having heard Ady's words or, more likely choosing to ignore them. "En a few hours me and Gru will rule ze world. Zen, when zese plans 'ave come to fruition we will decide what to do wiz you."

She said while starting towards the door. She paused and indicated the computer screens.

"As long as you are living, you might as well watch wiz everyone else. At ze end ove ze day I will be ze most powerful woman en ze world and you will be even less significant zen you already are."

XXX

Nefario left the girls upstairs while he returned to the lab, but had made sure to keep the screen on so he could keep an eye on them. He'd also ordered them to stay in the living room, but so far this didn't seem to be working very well.

"Hey! Where's you sister?" Nefario asked after he happened to look up from a separate screen he was working on. Margo was helping Agnes color in a picture. She looked up from it and motioned vaguely to the television screen. Nefario frowned and raised his eyebrow. He opened his mouth to direct another question at them but didn't get a chance to because Edith, who was hiding under the tv out of view jumped up and made a face in the screen. Nefario recoiled and then glared at her.

"Would you please stop doing that? Stay away from the screen." He mumbled to himself as he returned to the other computer, which was much smaller. There was a G on the desktop and in the foreground of that the cookie bot program was loading. It was at 95%. He was also periodically checking the feed from the moon, waiting for the Whirl Machine to grow large again so that he could connect to it.

He jumped when one of Polina's henchmen tapped him on the shoulder and then carefully moved in front of the screen loading the cookie bots so that the big man couldn't see it.

"Look, there's really nothing much for you to do right now." The big man continued to stare. Nefario cleared his throat. They really were quite creepy.

"Uh, Phil, Kevil, take…um…our friend here over there to…to the water cooler until I need him."

The two minions had paused to stare at the big man and Kevin's mouth was open.

"Okay…" Kevin said after a moment before motioning towards the water cooler. "Kono yo ni," he added while pulling on the henchman's pant leg.

Nefario shook his head when the minions left and returned his gaze to the screen. It was finished loading. He wasn't sure what he had been expecting but this was not it. Polina had removed all of the cookie bots from their previous locations. They were not all in one place and showing the same thing.

"Oh…this isn't good."

XXX

Polina slipped her arm around Gru's, bringing him out of his thoughts. He had been standing on the platform by the large consol that controlled the mass atomizer and was staring down at the kidnapped men and Polina's associate, Henrick who was moving back and forth between the atomizer and a separate consol that was acting as a direct communication to the Whirl Maker, or would be as soon as it grew large. Strapped in the atomizer was the President of France who was clearly not happy and was in fact shouting all manner of curses and pleas in French.

"I 'ave been waiting for zis day for a long time," she said while moving her fingers up his forearm. "You 'ave been very helpful," she added as her fingers traveled to his chin and she pulled his head towards her. "I am very appreciative. Shall we make a start ove zis? Ze whirlmaker will be ready soon." Gru pulled away from her a little and nodded sullenly, wearing a stormy expression.

"All right zen." She raised a small mic. "Henrick, get me ze U.N." Gru watched as the figure broke away from the consol.

There was a sound from above as a large screen slowly lowered itself. It was probably a little bigger then even the jumbotron had been. When it stopped it flashed on, showing a massive room crowded with people. It was clear that Polina had interrupted whatever had previously been on the two massive television screens at U.N headquarters. It took a moment for everyone in the room the get up to speed and realize that the projected image of the president of the United States was replaced by a dark woman covered in various furs and a bald man with a hook nose and his hands folded behind his back.

"Bonjour." Polina said with a hint of a smile as she held her cigarette out to Gru. He eyed it wearily for a moment before searching his pockets for a lighter. Unfortunately because Nefario had added so many more of them he seemed to have some difficulty. Polina got impatient and waved him off.

"What is the meaning of this?" The president said after a moment.

"I merely wished to ease ze concern ove ze world in regards to zere missing leaders." Polina said while waving the cigarette holder towards Henrick, who nodded and switched the feed of one of the televisions so that it showed the men in the room. There was a moment of silence while the people in the U.N stared at the image.

"What do you want?" The president said weakly.

"Everysing. I want ze countries ove ze U.N to surrender leadership to me and my partner," she said, while motioning towards Gru, who was looking sort of distant again. The President raised his eyebrows and gave her the somewhat nervous grin of someone who is trying to appear confident in distressing circumstances.

"The loss of these great leaders has indeed been a tragedy, but with all due respect there are people, even now waiting to replace them. We can negotiate a price to set them free, but we must refuse your offer." Polina smiled in a manner of someone who was absolutely confident and did not find anything distressing with the circumstances at all.

"Well, I do hope your replacements are competent men. Zey will 'ave to be. Zey will 'ave a lot to deal wiz. Ze moon feed, please Henrick."

The screens flashed to the moon.

"I…don't see the correlation. What are we looking at?"

"Give it a moment, Mr. President." Polina said with a grin. "Sree, two, one." The people of the U.N watched in horror as the massive machine grew to its correct size. Some of the men who had been waiting on the moons surface had to clear away quickly, obviously not aware at how big the machine was going to get. One was launched back and rather ruined the moment by kicking desperately to try and return to his station. The associates that had recovered quicker snapped the plugs and wires in place.

"To zose of you not familiar wiz zis devise, it ez called ze Whirl Machine, recently acquired from area 51, capable of sending localize tornadoes and hurricanes at impressive distances and until now secretly used by ze U.S to crash test planes. I could send a wave ove devastation across zis half ove ze world, in anozzer 12 hours I can target ze ozzer half, zen again ze current position ove ze moon ez just about right so zat I can target you gentlemen I sink. Oh and do not bozzer to send people up to ze moon to retrieve or destroy it. I 'ave satellites en position to shoot down any foreign crafts."

The president had paled considerably during her speech. There were a lot of hushed conversations going on between the delegates from the various countries. Gru was eyeing the Whirl Machine but his thoughts were somewhere else. In fact, they were on the beach. He was thinking about the tide, the ground slipping away, Ady.

"Could we have…a moment to discuss this amongst ourselves?" The president asked nervously, his voice coming from a mile away.

"Certainly…alzough, you must understand zat I am in a bit ove a hurry. So, until you come to a decision…" She waved again to Henrick and the feed switched to the President of France, thrashing in the chair. "Zis…gentlemen ez ze mass atomizer. Every hour zat you remain undecided I will disintegrate one ove zese great men and I will demonstrate wiz zis one. Be so kind as to pull ze lever, Gru."

Gru's blue eyes flashed towards her briefly before returning to the screen, his thoughts abruptly back in the present again.

"I thought de mass atomizer was for a method ove persuasion," he said below his breath.

"Zis ez how I persuade. Don't embarrass me, pull ze lever." She hissed back, while still smiling at the men on the screen. He cleared his throat and unfolded his hands before stepping towards the panel and wrapping his slender fingers around the lever. He pulled it. There was an embarrassed silence.

"Uhh…what…what's it supposed to do?" The President asked, clearly frazzled incase the president of France was suffering some unseen horror. Polina glared at Gru. He shrugged. She made a cutting motion across her throat to Henrick who cut the feed.

"Why isn't et working?" She asked. All it had done was fizz a little and make the Presidents hair stand up.

"I don't know, eet was working fine before. Maybe one of de wires ees loose."

"Well go fix et!" She said angrily.

XXX

After a while Edith got tired of finding ways to scare Nefario, particularly because he'd gotten distracted by something and was now searching desperately through the piles of junk in his vicinity while talking to himself.

She lumbered over towards her sisters and flopped down on the couch.

"Why didn't Ady come today?" She asked finally.

"I don't know…" Margo answered while looking up from her and Agnes' picture. She'd been wondering the same thing. "Maybe something came up." She added uncertainly.

"Do you think she's going to come back?"

"I'm sure she wouldn't just leave." Margo said. Her younger sister rested her chin on her arm and stared dismally on the television screen for a while.

"We could call her." Agnes said. Margo nodded after a moment and cast a look at the screen as well. Nefario was clearly not paying attention.

"Come on," she said as she stood, taking Agnes' hand. Edith rolled off the couch and followed them.

Margo moved a stool over to the counter and climbed up onto it to locate the phone book before flipping through it to find Ady's number. Edith handed her the phone when she climbed back down again.

She dialed the number and waited. It rang twice before cutting into a mechanical voice.

"It says the number's been disconnected." Margo said hesitantly.

"Maybe she moved." Edith said.

"I doubt…she moved." Margo said, but carefully. Perhaps it had been a mistake to talk her father into going to dinner with Ady.

"Maybe daddy's a really bad kisser." Agnes added. Margo set the phone down.

"I'm sure everything's fine," she said in the special voice she used to reassure her sisters when she herself was uncertain. "Come on, let's get back to the living room before Uncle Nefario notices we're missing." She said as they headed back towards the hall. Unnoticed by them, a large shape detached from its place behind the door.

XXX

Dr. Nefario was going through a personal battle. On the one hand, if he sort of let this go, as he really would have liked to and Gru found out, he would be very upset. Nefario was too old to look for a new job. Also, it had occurred to him that this was almost certainly his fault. He frowned and then began looking through the metal drawers in the counter.

"Could just let her blow up…solve all of my problems but no…" he mumbled vaguely.

He found what he was looking for in the back of the bottom drawer on his right hand side. It was the original controller for the cookie bots. He moved back in front of the screen and pressed a few buttons on the keyboard so that it split and he could see the viewpoints from all of the bots.

"I am going to be sacked…if this doesn't work." He said before adjusting a few things on the controller.

XXX

Ady's arms and legs were getting stiff and her head was still killing her. Since the creepy lady had left she'd been experimenting with how much she could move her arms and legs before one of the bots started whirring. Hardly at all as it turned out. Eventually she gave up on this and instead stared at the screens in front of her. There were about five of them and they made her uncomfortable.

One of them was focused on an enclosed area of glass with a lot of distraught men in it. They were mostly uniformed or wearing suits, but they appeared to be either at the edge of sanity or in some cases seemed to have vaulted over it. Some of them looked quite foreign. Ady remembered vaguely hearing about a lot of important men being kidnapped on the news recently. She frowned.

Another screen showed a really nasty looking mechanism, also in a room of glass that vaguely looked like a modernized version of what Sweeny Todd might use for hair dryers in his hair salon if that play had taken place more recently. One of the important looking men was strapped into one of the chairs. He was looking very nervous.

The third screen showed the surface of what looked like the moon, which was strange and unsettling. There was something strapped to a lot of wires and men in space suits. Ady tore her gaze away from that with unease. She was thinking again of villains from cartoons. They always had some sort of doomsday device.

"How…did I get myself into this crap…" she said below her breath. Her green eyes settled on the fourth screen and stayed glued to it for a while. It showed a wide view of the area where both the mechanism and the smaller glass room with the men in it were. She could also see a series of platforms, several large men wandering around, Polina herself, who was standing at the edge of one of the platforms by a large panel that looked like something out of a government building or nuclear plant and then there was Gru, standing beside her.

She felt an unusual range of emotions while staring at him, but they eventually plateau'd to something like hate. There were other things like vague bewilderment and perhaps a bit of hurt, but mostly she ignored these and focused on the anger.

For a while Ady had a hard time deciphering what the fifth screen was. It showed the big glass room, but it was on a strange level and seemed to move around a lot. Eventually after looking back and forth between the fourth and last screen she decided the last camera or whatever it was, was actually attached to Gru. She wondered if he knew about it and then decided she didn't care.

She leaned back slightly and eyed the ceiling while wondering if she could get away from the ballistic cookies if she moved fast enough. The door was unguarded, apparently Polina didn't think it was necessary but it was probably locked, even so. Ady scowled and decided that if she were able to get a chance she was going to punch that woman in the nose. Come to think of it, if she saw Gru again she'd probably punch him in the face too.

Thinking like this made her feel better, like she had some control over the situation. She tried not to think about the fact that she was in a dark room, in a nightshirt, could probably explode any second and was at the hands of people trying to take over the world. What did that make her, the equivalent of those simpering girls screaming their heads off while being tied to the train tracks?

She made a vague sound of disgust and looked up at the screens again particularly the ones showing the kidnapped men and Gru and Polina.

Gru had done things to suggest that he was not a good person. He'd pointed a gun at her the first time they'd met, he'd threatened her several times and there was the thing with the meters and the big underground lab thing and the weird dog and the decorations in his house but…after a while all of that stuff…it had seemed like ornamentation, like everything horrible about him was just a cover for something…at least half decent…slightly psychotic, but decent. It was hard to look at those screens and still think that.

_How can someone play tea party and make a book about unicorns and wear pink gingham aprons…how can that person also be this person? _

Ady was brought out of her thoughts because one of the cookie bots had started whirring.

"Come on, I didn't even move that time." She said testily. It quivered briefly, much to Ady's alarm, then the scope started flashing. "Oh…damn…" She considered trying to throw it across the room, but before she could move, it stopped and the little scope on the bot turned from side to side as if trying to get a look at the room before it crawled off of her towards the door.

Ady raised her eyebrow and turned her head as the other bots around her did the same. When she was free of them she rubbed vaguely at her arms and legs and stared at the cookie bots with a frown.

"What the…"

One of them cut a small hole in the wall and moved up to it as if it were scoping out the room beyond. Then a few others began moving up the door, cutting through the wall as they did. Ady stood from the chair and watched them bewilderedly as the door fell off of its hinges. The remaining cookie bots began skittering out of the room.

"Oookay." She moved to the door cautiously and looked out. Beyond was another room similar to the one she was in. It was covered in a variety of plans and grids and models. Various maps were pinned up on the walls with foreign writing across them. There was another door in here. This door was unlike the one in the previous room. There was something immovable about it and there was a keypad embedded into the wall at one side. A couple of the cookie bots attempted to slice through the wall before sputtering and falling to the ground without making a dent.

Ady watched them wearily for a moment before picking up a random sheet strewn on one of the counters and eyeing it. She caught side of a small crude machine that looked a lot like an ancient laptop on the table and put the sheet down while she leaned over to look at it. It was showing the room she was currently in from a dozen different perspectives. She raised her eyebrow.

Ady shouted when she felt something crawling up her leg and looked down at the cookie bot.

"Hey!" She said as she made a swipe at it and missed as it skittered up her back and settled on her shoulder. She raised her hand to hit it off of her but paused when she heard a heavy sound from the metal door as a mechanism unlocked from the inside.

After a moment it slid open and a big man edged his way in, caught sight of her and made a sound of surprise, slightly muddled by his lack of tongue.

"Ah…crap."

He took an ominous step forward. On her shoulder the cookie bot rose and sent a brief burst of what looked like a laser, which burned into the big man's forehead. He shouted and stumbled back. As he did, two more of the bots tripped him up and he went crashing to the ground.

The bots skittered out of the door and started to climb up the walls and spread out. The one on her shoulder settled back down. She cast it a brief untrusting look before raising her hand to removed it again. It whirred angrily.

"All right, fine! Start flashing and I swear I'll pull all of those tiny metal legs off," she wasn't sure that this was a legitimate threat but at this point it hardly mattered.

Ady stepped over the fallen man carefully, wincing slightly as he groaned. Beyond was a glass floor, which felt almost like ice to her bare feet. After taking a few more steps the bot on her shoulder hopped down and started to skitter like an oddly shaped spider across the floor. It paused and the scope spun around to face her, waiting. Ady sighed.

"A cookie wants me to follow it. This is just…not normal," she said below her breath. Still, it wasn't like she had much of a choice.

The bot led her along the glass floor, moving behind things whenever one of Polina's huge minions were wondering around.

Ady moved cautiously through the glass hall, which emptied out into a much larger room, also predominantly made of glass, although the glass itself, at least the glass making up the outside of the big room wasn't transparent and in fact looked more like diamond.

It sort of looked like a warehouse. There were devices she couldn't identify, random doors, sweeping stairways leading up into an upper level made of a network of narrow raised platforms, the occasional sleek piece of furniture made up of a variety of furs looking quite out of place, there were screens embedded in the walls, showing images, maps and figures, and large modern looking computer consoles.

She was absorbed in this and therefore didn't notice that the bot had stopped until she nearly stepped on it. When she looked down the bot seemed to stutter a moment then the legs folded up and it clattered to the floor looking like just a regular cookie.

She continued to look at it for a moment before ducking behind one of the consoles. The reason she did this was because she saw Gru.

XXX

Nefario had pulled out his cell phone and was balancing it on his shoulder while operating the controller.

"Come on, Gru. Damn." He said as he set the cell phone down and focused again on the screen. "I'll just have to find him."

He'd spread out the remaining bots so that he could scope out the area and was trying to keep an eye on all of the screens.

Nefario was aware of someone tapping on his shoulder. He turned away from the computer.

"I told you, there's nothing for you to do right…" he stopped because he was aware that he was staring into the barrel of one of his own guns. The worlds 'Sleep Ray' were printed along the side.

"Oh blast," he said before the big man pulled the trigger. The old man crumpled to the floor. On the far side of the lab, the lift came to a rest and the girls dismounted.

XXX

Bitterly, Gru headed down the stairs to the lower level of the glass chasm. He stuffed his hands in his pockets as he reached the device and eyed the President of France with weariness.

"Me laisser aller s'il vous plaît!" The man said, wild eyed. Gru scoffed without much humor.

"Vous demandez la mauvaise personne." He responded dryly before he began to search his coat. He sighed after a while and, after casting a brief look up at the platform towards where Polina was, only to note that she had apparently stepped away, unzipped his jacket and shrugged it off of his shoulders so that he could get at some of the more questionably placed pockets. He set it down and after a brief search, found what he was looking for and went around to the back of the mass atomizer to remove a panel so he could get at the wires.

Ady watched him for a moment, her heart pounding.

Her eyes flashed briefly to Gru's coat and then scoped the area in order to see if there was anyone in a position to see her as she moved carefully towards it. She was already barefoot, so it was easy enough to keep quiet. She was also holding her breath.

She slipped her fingers under the fabric and pulled gently at something sticking out of one of the inner pockets, hoping, for once that it was something dangerous. It was.

It looked almost like a nerf gun, although toys were generally more colorful. Still the cylinder was massive and took up a good amount of the weapon and she also noted it had a G on the side. Ady moved a little closer to Gru, then after examining the strange gun for a moment, pushed what she assumed was the hammer down. There was a click and a small dart appeared in the barrel, it's nose coming to a sharp point.

Gru stopped what he had been doing, which was reattaching a qire that had fallen look and for a second just sat, as if trying to decide what to do next. After a moment he raised his hands very carefully, a small tool still held in one and the removed panel in the other. He began to stand.

"Eet ees a little unwise to be doeeng dis before you know eef de machine ees fixed," he said wearily before turning. Ady's fingers tightened on the gun. Gru's expression went from lethargy to comical surprise in a matter of seconds.

"Ady," He started, his face lighting up slightly as he began to lower his hands.

"Don't put you're hands down." Ady said. Gru paused, registered the dart gun and slowly raised his hands again, looking bewildered. This expression deepened as the situation dawned on him.

"What are you doeeng here?"

"That's a really good question Gru, what am I doing here?" Ady said as she blew a few stray hairs out of her eyes.

"I don't…understand."

"Well while you were apparently…trying to take over the world as it turns out, I was having my apartment destroyed. Then I was knocked out and I woke up in a room with a lot of exploding cookie things on me."

"What?" Gru replied, before his gaze returned to the platform, where Polina had been and his expression hardened as the anger boiled up like acid in his stomach.

"Now, is there any other confusing demented thing you would like to do to make my life complicated before I shoot you?" Ady said, getting his attention again. He eyed the gun.

"You are not goeeng to shoot me." Gru said while taking a step towards her and lowering his hands again. Ady took a step back.

"Bet?"

"You do not even know how to operate dat,"

"I can make an educated guess." He took another step forward, this time with an intent of grabbing at the weapon, it was fortunate that Gru had excellent reflexes and was therefore able to bring the panel he was still holding up to block the dart when she pulled the trigger. For a moment he stared at her with his mouth open.

"You…you just shot dat at me!" He said. "Did you even know what eet would do?" She pulled the hammer down again and there was another click as a dart slid into place. Gru frowned and slowly put his hands up again.

"It's been a really long morning Gr…" This time he got to her before she could pull the trigger, grabbing her wrist and pulling her arm up so that the gun wasn't aimed at him anymore. He pulled her towards him and still holding her wrist, and wrapped his other arm around her to keep her from getting away or hitting him.

"Let go." She said each word like bullets being loaded into a cartridge.

When the gun was in a position where it wouldn't do harm, Gru pulled the trigger so the dart went upward and then he wrenched it from her fingers. Ady struggled against him, but he'd spun her around so she couldn't get any effective kicks in and he had both of her arms in restraint.

"I will let you go aftor you stop acting completely out ove your mind!"

"Me? You're calling me crazy? You…you weird, despicable, horrible, confusing psycho!" She hissed back.

"Look, I had notheeng to do weeth your apartment," he said while casting a brief look up at the platform to make sure Polina still wasn't there. "I did not mean for dis to happen!" he added as he increased his grip on her and pulled her behind the panel.

"Yeah, well great, that makes me feel much better," she said angrily. She managed to get an arm free enough to elbow him in the stomach and slip out of his grip.

When Gru rose, slightly winded Ady clenched her fist. He raised his hand slightly.

"All right hold on. Obviously you are angry," he said, holding his stomach.

"That's an understatement Gru. The only reason I haven't shot you is because you took the gun away."

"Fine, whatever, very angry! But leestin, you will not geet out ove here weethout my help so you 'ave to stop heeting me and tryeeng to kill me for at least a leetle while so dat I can focus!" Ady glared at him for a moment. Finally she lowered her fist with a sigh.

"Fine!" She said in an angry whisper.

"All right. How deed you geet out here?" Gru said as he straightened.

"Through there. One of those…things got me out…" She said while motioning vaguely at the fallen cookie bot. "One of the cookies that blow up. She had them all over me and they just started freaking out and cutting through the walls." Ady added before crossing her arms.

Gru grabbed his coat and began searching the pockets. He frowned and searched briefly through his pant pockets too.

"I do not 'ave my phone, I can't geet een contact weeth Doctor Nefario." he said with a sigh before pulling his coat over his shoulders. "I will 'ave to take you out de front way. Let's go before she gets back."

He eyed the dart gun for a moment before shaking his head and pulling out the freeze ray.

"Here, I am not trusting you weeth sometheeng deadly." Ady eyed it before taking it from him bitterly. "Shoot anyone you see…anyone who ees not me."

Ady followed Gru carefully as he moved around the mass atomizer, eyeing the area beyond. He cast another look up at the platform. Gru could feel Ady's heated gaze on his back.

After a moment he cast a brief look at her.

"Eef I apologize, will you stop glareeng at me like dat," he said as they paused behind a computer consol near the stairs.

"Apologize for what, this morning? Last night? Or are we going all the way back to the day I met you." Ady whispered back. Gru sighed. "Why couldn't you just…leave me alone? Why did you have to…start acting human?" she added sullenly.

"Dis ees not just my fault." He said while motioning for her to follow him up the stairs.

"How…is this not your fault?" She said after a moment.

"You say theengs dat drive me crazy. I could not ignore you. I tried! Even when I thought I hated you, I could not geet you out ove my head! You theenk dat I like de fact dat you…make me feel so…awkward?"

"And you thought offering me expensive wine and trying to kiss me on the beach would solve that for you..."

"No! I deed dat because I wanted to! I wanted to talk to you dis morning and if dere was any chance dat I could 'ave you instead ove de world, I would 'ave taken eet!"

A brief look of surprise flashed in Ady's expression before it dissolved into alarm as a voice like syrup drifted over the platform.

"And what a poor exchange et would 'ave been." Gru turned with some horror as Polina's heels clicked over the glass.

Ady grunted as the barrel of a gun was shoved against her back as a couple of large men came up the stairs behind them. They were forced up the stairs the rest way by general shoving.

Gru scowled at Polina when they came to a stop on the platform.

"I am so disappointed en you Gru."

"You had no right to take hor," he said in a low voice.

"I saw her as a sreat to my plan. Am I mistaken en zis?" Still glaring, he raised the dart gun. Ady looked sideways at him and tightened her fingers around the freeze ray.

"I would drop et if I were you. You sink zis girl waz ze only sreat I saw?" Gru raised his eyebrow and then slowly a look of horror crossed his face.

"What are you…" Polina smiled.

"I always 'ave a back up plan," she said as she held her gloved hand out. Doug lumbered forward and placed a small item in her palm. She held it up. It was Margo's glasses. She tossed them so that they clattered to the floor and slid to a stop at Gru's polished shoe.

"No…" He said distantly. Ady stared at them for a moment before narrowing her eyes and looking up at the woman angrily. Her gaze shifted when Gru lunged forward. "You leave dem alone! I swear eef you touched dem…" The big men behind him grabbed him as he tried to bring the gun up level to the French woman again. Ady raised the freeze ray and shot at one of the men holding him before another grabbed her and restrained her. Still, Gru was able to shove his way out enough so that he could get a clear shot at the woman.

"Steady yourself," Polina said without concern as she put a cigarette in her mouth. "You shoot me zey will never get out ove here alive." Gru glared at her, shaking with rage. "Drop ze weapon. Or don't…" she added as he continued to glare at her. "One word from me and zey will be no more." Gru hissed through his teeth and dropped the gun. "You too," she added to Ady who dropped the freeze ray.

"You know, I am impressed at how much ove a fight zey put up. One ove my henchman was left twitching on ze floor ove your kitchen. Kick zat over here, Bernard." She said as the big henchman kicked the dart gun over to Polina. She picked it up and examined it for a few seconds.

"Zis ez anozzer common villain mistake. Underestimating your victims. Allowing zem to stand up for zemselves…or escape," she added as she cast a look at Ady, who gave her a look of pure hatred in return. "Well, I learn from my mistakes," she said brightly before raising the gun and shooting her.

Ady looked surprised for a moment before she gasped and folded up. The henchman who had been restraining her let go so that she fell to the glass floor.

"Poison darts." Polina said in the ensuing silence as Gru stared at the younger woman, exhaling sharply as if the wind had been knocked out of him again. "A little cliché…a bit old fashioned…but effective. To his knees." The henchmen increased their grip so that Gru was forced to his knees and a gun was pushed up against the back of his head. His blue eyes stayed fixed on Ady until Polina had moved to a position that was directly in front of him. The gaze shifted to her heels.

"What a shame. You had…promise. Take him to ze trepanning room. Remove his coat first and anysing else he has on him. Srow ze girl in wiz ze old man. She will be dead soon."

XXX

Nefario woke up in a room that made skilled hunters and poachers look like kids playing with a stick and would reduce a vegetarian to a whimpering puddle. It was covered in furs, heads, feathers, horns, tusks and teeth, many of them strange and exotic.

He was eyeing them glumly when Polina's henchmen dragged Ady in. Polina stood in the door and gave Nefario a smile.

"I see you are awake and admiring my trophies."

"What have you done with Gru?" Nefario asked while eyeing the younger woman out of the corner of his eye.

"I wouldn't worry about him. En an hour or so he will be very very compliant. I should sank you for all ove ze help you 'ave been," she added amusedly as she threw Gru's coat at the doctors feet. The door was shut behind her.

Nefario glared at the door for a while before it became a look of bitterness.

"I'm an old fool," he said below his breath as he picked up Gru's coat. All of the guns had been removed. He set it down with a sigh, before a thought occurred to him slowly.

He eyed Ady and after a moment picked up her wrist, testing her pulse before laying the coat down and going through all of the extra pockets he added, pulling out whatever was overlooked or left.

He found what he was looking for in one of the more questionably placed pockets near the hem. "Well, young lady, it's your lucky day…well…supposing this works…and there are no horrible side effects," he added as he pulled out a vial of amber liquid and the small syringe gun. He clicked the vial into place and after judging where a vein might be, a difficult thing when one generally works with minions and not humans, gave her the shot. "Best way to test something, I always thought."

Afterwards he searched his own pockets until he found his cell phone and flipped it open.

Ady's breathing became easier and after a few moments she opened her eyes and stared at the giant head of a Persian Tiger looming over her.

"Am I going to be unsettled by something every time I wake up now?" She muttered, through lips that were still half paralyzed.

"Say what you like, she does have style." Nefario said from somewhere beside her. "All extinct I shouldn't wonder." Ady struggled to a sitting position and swallowed. She felt like she was coming off of a bad flu or something.

"Oh damn, you're here too." She said.

"Hey, I didn't have to give you that shot." Nefario mumbled. Something occurred to Ady and she woke up a little more.

"That woman has the girls and Gru."

"I know."

"Well…what can we do?"

He eyed her briefly.

"In case you haven't noticed madam, we are in the middle of an evil fortress, weaponless and surrounded by large men with guns." He said while still eyeing his phone. "I am trying to map the place out, but this bloody thing barely gets any bars here." Ady sighed and looked vaguely at the phone.

"How are you going to map the place out?"

"Those cookie bots were built to retrieve an item from another villains vault. I installed them with…well it's sort of like sonic radar…only more advanced. They can give me a crude model of the house. I call it Nefario vision." He paused for the effect then cleared his throat as the girl eyed him with disinterest. "I've been trying to hack into the program connected to the Whirl Machine and the atomizer but she's changed all of the passwords."

"Why are they shaped like cookies?" Ady said while eyeing the stuff from Gru's coat that Nefario had set aside.

"Well…the villain had a sweet tooth."

"So what if he ate them…why not like…the box?" She said as she picked up a small cylinder that looked vaguely like a pen and pressed the button on the end, a pinpoint laser shot out and hit the tiger head which fell off of the wall smoking. Ady's eyes had widened slightly before she eyed the pen again with her eyebrows raised. She was wearing an expression not akin to what Edith might have in the same position.

"Look, it was Gru's idea, keep quiet so I can focus! There we are, program's loading." Ady peered over his shoulder again.

"You have windows 2.1x?" Nefario scowled.

"Yes, why?"

"That program was made in the 80's. There are like…twelve newer versions."

"This one works fine."

"I'm surprised it even runs the Internet." Nefario sighed heavily and there was silence as they watched the cookie bots program inch along. Finally it was loaded. Nefario pressed a few buttons while glaring vaguely at Ady. When the bots had been activated they began scanning the floor plan of Polina's house.

"All right, according to this, we are here…if I can just move the bots to where Gru and the girls are we can pinpoint their locations too…of course we still need to find a way out but…" He was interrupted because Ady brought the pen up again and pressed the button, dragging it along the side of the door with the hinges. After a moment the door fell in slowly.

"Yes well…I could have thought of that." He said testily.

XXX

Meanwhile, Margo Edith and Agnes were in another so-called trophy room. This one looked more like something Gru might have in his house. It was filled with various ancient weapons and sharp things. The girls themselves were tied down to a large bomb. They were in their socks, mainly because Edith kept kicking people and Margo was without her glasses because, after she tasered two henchmen they got the hint and wrestled them from her.

There was a screen attached to the wall and Polina had set it up so it showed the room where she'd taken Gru, who was strapped down to a chair with a very sharp drill near his head.

Margo had been trying to get loose for the last twenty minutes while also attempting to comfort her sisters, especially Agnes who was crying softly.

"It's going to be all right," she said, trying to reassure herself as well. "Guys, try to help me with these ropes."

"What's the point?" Edith said from one side of her.

"She's going to hurt daddy." Agnes said softly. Margo opened her mouth but paused when she saw a small square cut itself out of the wall. The cookie bot skittered in, looked around briefly and then died.

"What's that?" Edith said.

"I think it's one of Uncle Nefario's things…dad says they malfunction a lot." After she said this they jumped because the door was knocked off of its hinges. Ady carefully stepped over it. Nefario was behind her untangling a gun from a fallen henchman who was unlucky enough to be in the cookie bot's way.

"Ady!" Margo said, her voice picking up notes of confusion and happiness.

"Hey, you guys okay?" She asked as she began fiddling with the knots. She had pulled Gru's coat on and had tucked the laser pen back in one of the pockets.

"They took my boots." Edith said glumly.

"Were fine," Margo interrupted her. "But that woman has dad." Nefario had wondered in and was peering at the screen.

"Only a few of the bots are still working. Well I say working. One of them keeps spinning around in circles for some reason…"

Margo helped Ady with the ropes once her arms were free.

"Is this a giant bomb?" Ady asked, seemingly noticing it for the first time.

"Yeah, I think it's just for show though." Margo said. "She told us she was going to send us off to press wine or something."

When Agnes was free she threw her arms around Ady's neck.

"Don't let her hurt him," she said. Ady frowned.

"Uh…don't worry it'll be…fine." She said awkwardly as she picked the small girl up. Edith had jumped down from the bomb and was examining all of the sharp things in the room. She would have been doing this anyways, but she was doing it now with a determined expression.

"All right…I think I've got it." Nefario said. "The wall is too strong to cut through, but I'm pretty sure this is the room." He said while showing the phone to Ady, who had been watching the screen. Agnes was burying her face in her shoulder.

Ady examined the phone for a while and then cast a brief look behind her at Margo and Edith.

"Hey!" She said as she grabbed the sharp thing that Edith had picked up and examined it briefly.

"Looks like an ancient Chinese ring…those things are rare." Nefario said. Ady put it back on the table and pulled Edith away from it.

"Make sure she doesn't touch anything." She said to Nefario.

"Me? You're the babysitter." He said as Ady detached Agnes from her and set her gently down by Margo.

"So where is this room?"

"Oh you have to be joking. I happen to be the evil scientist here. I'll go rescue Gru, you stay put and watch the girls."

"Hey…" Margo started.

"You're like a hundred." Ady said, ignoring her.

"I am not a hundred. I'm eighty-seven, and I've been doing this sort of thing for nearly seventy years. What have you been doing, filling out orders at a burger joint?" Ady stared at him for a moment and then grabbed the gun he was holding and held it over her head so he couldn't reach it.

"Hey!" Nefario said.

"Guys!" Margo said getting both of their attention. "We're not staying here."

"Yeah, we wanna come too." Edith added.

"No way, too dangerous." Ady said while extending her arm again when Nefario almost got at the weapon.

"Yeah, but it's probably dangerous here too." Margo said.

"She has a point." Nefario said with some frustration. "We might as well all go."

"Fine, but you three stay close." Margo nodded as she grabbed Agnes's hand.

"And since we're all going, you give me back that gun." Nefario said testily.

"No." Ady replied while grabbing Edith's arm and pulling her, once again, away from the weapons. "I have seen the way you shoot."

"If you're talking about the anti gravity gun, that…was an entirely different circumstance. That gun was still in experimental stages."

"Yeah well, if I get shot at I want it to be from them."

"You…stupid twist." He hissed after her as he followed her and the girls. "Should have just let you blow up," he added more quietly to himself.

XXX

After ensuring that he was strapped in, Polina leaned over Gru, who was wearing an expression of fury and grief.

"All ove zis could 'ave been avoided if you would 'ave just done what I said. You know Gru, despite zis current state of affairs I did rather like you," she said while running a long fingernail across his chest.

"If I get out ove here, you are goeeng to be very sorry." Gru said in a quiet voice, laced with hatred. She chuckled, sending another burst of fury like white hot iron in his head.

"You know ze difference between us Gru? You allow yourself weakness. You would not be en zis position ozzerwise. But you gave me leverage. You, however, 'ave no leverage. I 'ave no weakness." She placed her hand on his cheek.

"Don't worry, when zis ez over, you will see zem again. You may not recognize zem…of course," she said with a smile before straightening. "When ze world ez mine, I will start ze trepanning process. You are a bit scrawny to be a henchman, but I am certain I will find somesing for you to do."

She headed towards the door, her feet clicking. When she left Gru lowered his head and glared at the floor. His arms and legs were bound in leather straps. Another one was draped across his chest. The drill was pressed against the back of his head. For a while he pulled at the straps in vain. When it was clear that this was a futile effort he stopped and let out a sigh, heavy with sadness and frustration.

He heard the door behind him open.

"Well Mr. Gru, it appears as if…" Henrick started before his sentence ended in a loud grunt and there was a heavy sound as he hit the floor. Gru raised his eyebrow.

"That is not how you use a gun!" Nefario hissed. Gru raised his head slightly and attempted to look behind him. This resulted in the point from the drill hitting him in the back of the ear. He hissed.

"Yeah, well, it still worked." Ady replied as she grabbed the big drill and pulled it back slightly.

"Ady…" Gru said in a whisper as she started working on the straps on one of his arms. "You are…all right?" Nefario came around the other side.

"Apparently." She said, while casting him a brief look.

"De gurls…" Gru started.

"They're fine. Hey!" Nefario snapped. "Don't touch that! Don't let her touch that!" He added, confirming this statement as Edith stepped away from a drill, looking innocent.

"Daddy, are you okay?" Agnes asked as she moved up to where he was sitting. His expression had dissolved that of immense relief.

"I am now," he said as he touched the side of her head when one of his hands were loose. Margo had wondered over, dragging Edith behind her. She started helping Ady and Nefario undo the straps.

"You know I'm all right too, thank you for asking." Nefario said testily.

"So how do we get out of here?" Margo asked, ignoring Nefario, as Ady worked on the last strap around Gru's chest.

"Well we can't just leave." Nefario said. "I'm sure not about to let that woman take over the world with my machinery."

"Can you geet eento our programs?" Gru asked while eyeing Ady's fingers, working at the buckle.

"She changed all of the passwords." Gru growled a little as the strap fell away and he stood.

"I told you dis would happen! Now what are we goeeng to do?"

"So…all of this stuff is yours and…you just kind of let her have it…" Ady said dully. "Wow…you guys…are really bad at this, aren't you?"

"All right all right. I was wrong. Now's not the best time for this!" Nefario said while glaring at Ady. "We'll have to access the machines manually. Unless she somehow found out about it there's still that panel at the back of the consol. You can override her passwords from there."

"All right. You stay here. If anyone approaches, shoot dem." Gru said as he started towards the door. Ady and Margo exchanged a look. Margo started to follow him and Ady grabbed her by the arm and pulled her back.

"He can't just…go by himself."

Ady eyed Edith and Agnes and then sighed and stared in the direction Gru had left.

XXX

Gru jumped when he was touched on the shoulder from behind.

"What are you doeeng here!" He hissed as Ady drew level with him.

"Promised Margo I'd go with you…besides I don't fully trust you to do the right thing…you don't seem to have a knack for it."

"Go back to de room!" He said while looking around to make sure no one was around. He was standing in the opening to the large glass room.

"No." He turned towards her with frustration as she handed him the gun. He sighed.

"You should 'ave left dees." His voice was a little softer as he took it from her.

"I left that laser thing that was in your coat. Oh here." She started to take his coat off. He waved her back.

"Keep eet for now…you are…already…slightly underdressed." He said the last with some awkwardness.

"What are you going to do?" Ady said, slightly embarrassed as she pulled the coat back over her shoulders and tried to straighten her nightshirt so it covered more of her legs.

"Dere is a panel behind de G on de consol for de mass atomizer. Eef I can access eet I can switch all ove de passwords so she can't use eet anymore. Dat still leaves de Whirl Machine." He said the last more or less to himself. He was eyeing the consol that Henrick had been working on before, apparently being ordered into the room where Gru had been kept. "She ees talkeeng to de U.N again…" Gru said softly. Polina's voice was being carried across the glass walls. Gru scowled and made a decision. He pulled away from the wall.

"Wait, where are we going?"

"I am goeeng around. I'm goeeng to try to geet her from behind."

"Uhh, can you do that?"

"She ees standing at de consol for de mass atomizer. I can't get at eet weethout goeeng up dere. You stay here,"

"Hey," she said as she started to follow him. He stopped her by placing both hands on her shoulders. She shrugged his hands off. "Have I ever given you the impression that I'd do what you tell me to?" She added while blowing a bit of hair out of her eyes. He paused and then without any kind of warning, pulled her into his arms, catching her off guard.

"I am glad you are all right," he said and then before she could respond continued "Leestin, I need for you to stay down here. I am goeeng to geet hor attention. In de mean time, I need you to geet Dr. Nefario so dat he can jam de signal to de Whirl Maker on dat computer."

"Gru." She said as he let go and started towards the stairs.

"Stupid idiot!" She said before turning back towards the room where Nefario and the girls were.

XXX

Polina stood on the glass platform, her dark eyes on the men of the U.N, her smile bright, but with unpleasant undertones.

She'd been waiting for this day for a long time. Very very little was known about Polina's past. Anyone who had ever gotten close to her, for lack of a better word were either dead or, as it were, could not speak on the matter.

As a youth, a person like Polina must have either gotten everything she wanted, so that not getting something was unheard of, or else she got nothing and getting nothing for so long had made it so she wanted everything. Either way, it didn't matter now.

"I was 'aving some technical difficulties." She said through her silky cigarette smoke winding like fingers up to the ceiling. "Zey 'ave been resolved now. Would you like to see ze demonstration, or, 'ave you had enough time to sink sings over?"

"You won't get away with this." The President said. There was nothing much else for him to say. After he said it, it was clear by his expression that even he didn't think it was a good line.

"Such a wasteful, tired sing to say. Perhaps ze atomizer first zen." She reached for the lever only to pull back quickly when part of it blew up under her fingers. Doug, who was standing behind her, turned after Gru pulled the trigger. The big man started towards him. Unfortunately for Doug, Polina had reacted slightly faster; raising the dart gun she was still holding and shooting it. Gru ducked behind the big man who was hit with the dart.

Doug took a few more steps forward before a look of confusion settled in his expression and he fell over. Polina looked down at him for a moment, not so much with regret as frustration before turning the expression on Gru. She smiled a little.

"Well well…et seems I am making many misjudgments today," she said as he approached her, stepping over Doug.

She eyed the gun pointed at her as he approached and raised the dart gun in response while taking another drag from her cigarette.

"Put eet down…" Gru spat at her.

"Sir! Please! She has some…device on the moon…it's very dangerous. You must…!" The President said interrupting their locked gazes, as he was apparently under the impression that Gru was somehow on his side. Gru paused, momentarily bewildered before he scowled and shot at the screen cutting the president off.

While his attention was diverted Polina rushed forward, shoving him against the consol. He stumbled slightly, tried to raise the gun again but was unable to because she'd kicked him hard in the stomach with one of her sharp heels.

Gru wheezed and grabbed his stomach before Polina landed another kick on his ankle, which resulted in a loud and unpleasant crack. Without pause she brought the gun down hard on his wrist so that he'd drop his weapon. Gru slipped to the ground with a grunt, hissing through his teeth.

He inhaled sharply as Polina stepped down between his legs a quarter of an inch away from his groin and raised the gun level to his eyes.

"Zat screen was very expensive Gru," she said as she fingered the trigger. His blue eyes focused on it.

"Now I 'ave to get anozzer one. And how will I make my negotiations now?"

Apart from her voice, calm, but laced with venom, Gru was hearing another sound, distant, but persistent and irritating. It was a beeping noise.

His eyes fell on a small shape laying on the platform, Margo's glasses. Someone had bumped the screw on the side at some point. As he focused on these he saw movement out of the corner of his eyes and his gaze flickered to the doorway.

Polina noticed this and narrowed her eyes before she turned just as Ady was stepping over Doug. For a moment Polina looked slightly perplexed by Ady's presence, but this didn't stop her from pulling the trigger. Gru winced a little as the gun twanged. There was a sound akin to a rubber band snapping and part of the gun started oozing.

For a moment all three of them paused. Ady unglued first and punched the older woman in the nose.

Polina stumbled back, raising her perfectly manicured hand to her face. Perplexity became downright shock and this dissolved into rage.

"You…how dare you." She started, grabbing Gru's fallen gun as she rose.

Gru reacted quickly and grabbed the tiny glasses from off of the floor, bringing them up and in what was perhaps the oddest battle cry ever shouted;

"I want a lemon meringue!" The absurdity of this was emphasized by the fact that he had rose his voice a couple of octaves so that it sounded vaguely feminine and the glasses would register it. Polina jolted backwards as the tazer hit her. She stumbled briefly and before she could recover Ady punched her again, as hard as she could. The woman crumpled to the floor. Gru and Ady were quiet for a few moments, before their eyes met.

"I want a lemon meringue?" Ady asked. Another jolt went out of the glasses and hit Polina who fidgeted briefly on the ground. Ady raised her eyebrows.

"Eet ees sometheeng Dr. Nefario thought up. I told you to go back to de room." Gru said as he picked himself off of the ground with a grunt.

"Yeah, you looked like you were doing well…had everything under control. Besides the old guy's working on that whirl machine, whatever you called it."

"I 'ave plenty ove experience en dese matters." Gru said defensively, while rubbing at his stomach.

"She was going to shoot you."

"I could 'ave taken hor." He said as he picked up the dart gun and examined it. He sighed. "Thank god all ove our stuff malfunctions." He paused and then after a moment, very carefully placed Margo's glasses in his pocket.

XXX

Nefario pressed a few buttons on the computer on the lower level of the glass room. When he seemed satisfied he moved towards Gru, who was sitting on the side of a raised Platform examining his ankle. Ady and the girls were sitting near him.

"There, I've broken up the link between this place and the satellites and I jammed up the program. I imagine the government will take care of the rest…if they're good for anything." He nodded towards the mass atomizer. "What about that? I could probably get the ship down here and take it…"

"Just take eet apart." Gru said. Nefario paused for a moment and then nodded.

"And them?" Nefario added while nodding towards the glass room with the men in it. Gru looked up and after a moment met Margo's gaze. She was watching him. His eyes also flickered to Ady who eyed him briefly before looking away.

"Let dem out I guess…find a way to open de doors." He said in a sigh.

"I really hope this doesn't become a habit." Nefario said as he began searching the computer for a way to unlock the large glass room. "I mean, in the last three months we've saved the world twice…I'm not so sure I'm comfortable with that." Gru yawned.

"I do not theenk eet counts eef you put eet een danger een de forst place," he said before looking up and raising his eyebrow. "Dr. Nefario…"

"Hmm?"

"Why ees dat theeng following you?" Nefario turned. Doug, who had been looming near the computer, took a few steps toward him and stopped, wearing a slightly slack jawed expression.

"Well, I shot him with the antidote for the dart gun. Wanted to see if it traveled as fast in a body that size, general testing you know."

"Eesn't dat…kind ove risky?"

"Possibly. I keep telling him to go away…can't seem to shake him."

"We are not keeping him." Gru said as he pulled his pant leg down.

"Speaking of risky," Nefario said while motioning for Doug to hand him a tool so he could take the back off of the mass atomizer again. "What are we going to do with Miss de Molyneaux? We can't leave her. Even with this stuff shut down…she's not the sort of woman who will leave well enough alone."

They'd strapped her in one of the chairs connected to the drill. Gru stood and went to the doorway, eyeing her briefly. She was still unconscious. After Ady had punched her she'd hit her over the head with something for good measure.

Next to the chair that Polina was strapped into was a table with a very dangerous looking device on it. It looked as if slipped over one's head. There was a complicated blade mechanism about three quarters of the way down.

He moved towards it and picked it up, examining it before slipping it carefully over her head and standing back. He stared for a long moment. He was brought out of his thoughts when Agnes pulled on his pant leg.

"Daddy, can we go home." He nodded and picked her up.

"Yes, Agnes we can go home," he said as he headed out of the room again and closed the door, locking it behind him.

"What are we going to do?" Nefario asked.

"Leave hor."

"There are a lot of her henchmen around still." In fact they hadn't bothered them. A couple of them were keeping their distance. They didn't seem to know what to do when Polina wasn't giving orders.

"Do we still 'ave access to de Whirl Machine from our lab?" Gru asked.

"Now, certainly. Of course once the government does realize they can get to it we wont anymore."

"Dat ees all right den." Gru said. "Come on. Let's geet out ove here."

XXX

One of the important men, some Prime Minister who was still half sane had tried to thank Gru and offered to give him some kind of award or public commendation. He finally went away after Gru glared at him for a while.

Gru opened the tank and motioned for the girls and Dr. Nefario to proceed him. His gaze fell on Ady who was waving away the President of France, who was gabbling at her.

"Is there any way I can discourage you?" Nefario asked from behind him. Gru ignored him and approached her.

"Aller loin!" Gru said to the French man, who scowled at him but recoiled anyways, particularly when Gru drew the freeze ray, which he had retrieved, from Polina's lab from his coat. "Do you want a ride?" He added while turning to Ady and motioning towards the tank.

"I think I've had enough excitement for one day, thanks."

"I will go slowly." He said while moving a little closer to her and meeting her gaze. Ady felt her face grow warm again and she looked away.

"I guess I don't really have much of a choice…I don't think a cab will stop for me like this anyways," she said, before moving past him towards the tank.

It was even more crowded then it had been on the previous occasion. Agnes had crawled up on her lap and Nefario complained extensively because Edith kept jabbing him in the side.

Ady leaned back. Despite how fast her mind was reeling over everything that had happened, which would most likely result in night terrors for the next few years she was dozing off.

She felt Margo lean against her other arm and her gaze locked with Gru's as he eyed her in the rear view mirror. This of course meant that his eyes had left the road, but that probably didn't matter much to him.

Ady saw a very clear, slightly unsettling image of what the future might hold as butterflies rose in her stomach.

"Oh…boy," she said below her breath.

XXX

Meanwhile, a dark shape was looming overtop of Polina as well, but this was most certainly not metaphorical. She opened her eyes. Her makeup was slightly messy, which was a rare occurrence for her. She peered through the metal of the device she generally used to remove her minions' tongues.

Three henchmen were standing in front of her, watching her curiously.

"Don't just stand zere you idiots. Let me out ove here." She said in a hiss.

A look was exchanged between the henchmen.

One of them picked a jar from off of one of the tables, while another moved the big drill closer to the villainess.

"What are you doing? Undo zese straps." She said, her voice now carrying a note of uncertainty. The last henchman, who had just been watching her, began to mess with the device on her head.

They may have been stupid, but they knew how to operate the drill and the tongue removing device. They'd seen it done a hundred times on each other.

XXX

Translations:

President Of France: Let me go please!

Gru: You are asking the wrong person

Gru: Go away!

XXX

Mwahahahaha, lord, this chapter took forever! First I didn't have time, then it just…bah! Okay, anyways, I'm pleased to have finished it. The next one will be much easier to write. I had a lot of trouble with this so I hope it turned out all right.

Well there's one more chapter left. It won't be as long as this one...which I think...is the longest I've written so far. I'll have it up as soon as possible and I'll leave the details for the sequel like the title and when I think I'll have the first chapter up on the end of it.

Liloapril: Thank you ^^ I'm glad to hear you. One more chapter now, although I have decided to do a sequel so…yeah not over yet. Thanks for the review ^^

Flash37: Lol, well that is probably one of the better compliments I have received. Thank you very much and thanks for the review :)

Llalalala: Thanks, the next chapter will come sooner, I promise!

Roolsilver: Thank you very much. Ima totally sequelize it. This had been just too much fun to stop.

Wolfgrl1492: I love it when my writing makes people squeal with delight, glad to hear it ^^ I've decided that I will in fact do the sequel. Thanks for the review! ^^

Also, to those who reviewed the author's note (Even though I did kinda request for you not to): thanks for the sentiments. Hopefully this chapter did not disappoint.

Thank you very much for all of your patience. I hope you guys have a great evening!

XXX

Till next time


	22. The Worst Of You

Chapter 21:

The Worst Of You

Gru opened his eyes in the darkness of his room and stared at the ceiling for a while before sighing heavily and throwing the covers off. There was a bit of light coming from the window. In one corner of the room the wall was different. They'd mended the hole in the last couple of days. Gru reminded himself to go over it again. Right now 'mended' meant that Dr. Nefario had slapped a large metal slab overtop with some screws in it.

He stood, feeling his knees crack and his back and shoulders as well before he headed out into the hall and down the stairs.

He was already in a lousy mood and this did not improve a bit when he found his mother sitting in the kitchen reading the paper and drinking coffee. The girls were sitting at the table eating scrambled eggs, apart from Edith who was just squishing hers repeatedly under her fork.

"Mom, what are you doeeng here?" He asked in a half groan, half sigh.

"Uncle Nefario helped us call her so we could ask her to take us to ballet since…you kind of aren't allowed after the whole pizza place thing." Margo said quietly. "We asked him if he could but…he didn't seem all that interested."

"You look terrible…more terrible then usual anyways." His mother said.

Gru ignored her and instead poured himself a cup of coffee and sat down at the table with the girls.

"You want some scambled eggs daddy?" Agnes said while extending her fork and then making a little sound of distress when the eggs accumulated on it fell down onto the chair.

"No thank you, Agnes."

"So where's that babysitter of yours? She get tired of you yet?" Gru winced a little as he took a drink of his coffee.

"She quit grandma." Margo said after a moment, after casting a brief look at her father. Technically she hadn't. She hadn't really said anything, but she had changed her cell phone number and her home phone was off line and Gru when had driven by her apartment at one point there had been tape across the door and it had looked abandoned. They hadn't heard from her in two weeks.

Margo exchanged a look with Edith before the younger girl went back to squishing her eggs miserably.

"Pity, I liked her, she had spunk. So how did you screw it up?" She asked the last bit with some amusement. Instead of answering her, Gru stood up dourly and headed towards the living room.

He sat on the crocodile couch and set his coffee aside with a sigh before resting his chin in his hand. After a moment he turned the tv on and flipped vaguely through the channels. He hadn't watched the news in a week. He was getting sick of seeing stories on the returned leaders and the Whirl Machine. Instead he left it on a channel showing a black and white silent horror film.

XXX

After they finished breakfast, the girls headed upstairs to get dressed.

"I can't find my bow." Agnes said with a puff.

"No one cares, Agnes." Edith said gloomily as she pulled out a pair of hose with a series of holes cut in them.

"You can wear mine today." Margo said, handing the girl her barrette before pulling her slippers on.

"Margo, do you think Ady's coming back?"

"I dunno, Agnes."

"It hasn't been that long…she could still, right?"

"I guess."

"She changed all of her phone numbers, she doesn't like us anymore." Edith said before standing and pulling her hat down over her eyes.

"Nuh uh." Agnes said before turning her wide eyes at Margo.

"I'm sure that isn't the reason she changed her phone number," she said. "Come on, grandma's waiting. Don't mention Ady to dad, okay you guys," she added as she took Agnes' hand and they headed towards the stairs.

XXX

Gru scowled as his mother walked into the living room.

"You know, there aren't a lot of people who would put up with you…even for money. You should try to get her back." she said after a moment. Gru scowled.

"I don't theenk she ees coming back," he said after a moment. Marlena sat down next to him on the couch. Gru scooted over slightly, willing her not to talk.

"Remember when you were sixteen and you tried to impress that girl with that moon plant thing?" A look of weariness set in Gru's face.

"Eet was a Lunar Plant Growth Chamber. Eet was for growing plants on de moon."

"Yeah well, girls certainly care about that."

"Mom…I am really not in de mood for dis right now."

"Thirty something years later and you're still terrible with women. It's a good thing you adopted. I gave up on getting grandchildren the normal way years ago." Gru sighed heavily and slumped down on the couch, glaring at the window vaguely. To his relief the girls resurfaced from their room dressed in their tutus. Agnes approached him and scrambled up onto the couch.

"Can you help me put on my barrette?" She asked as she crawled up onto his lap. He took it from her and turned it over in his hand for a moment as if trying to work out how it operated.

"When we get back, do you want to color with me, daddy?" He smiled a little while clipping the tiny barrette on inexpertly.

"All right, Agnes." He said. She smiled and jumped off of the couch. His mother stood and followed the girls to the front door. She paused in the doorway, letting Margo, Edith and Agnes precede her outside.

"Do you want my opinion, Felonius?"

"Please, please just go away…" She ignored him.

"Any woman who is willing to look at an entire album of you isn't going to go far. I'm your mother and I can barely get through the thing." She said the last as she shut the door behind her.

Gru sat for a few moments longer before he stood and went back to the kitchen. He poured out the contents of his mug and briefly went through the cabinets before pulling out a box of instant coffee. The plastic was still on it from the store. He began to undo it.

There was a brief whirring sound from the living room. Gru frowned and looked up guiltily as Dr. Nefario entered the kitchen.

"Morning, Gru." Nefario said as Gru attempted to not look as if he'd been caught in the act of doing something wrong. "Well, I managed to get all of the undamaged cookie bots back. They're turned off for now but who knows, we may have another use for them in the future." Gru nodded vaguely.

"Also, apparently time square's got a new jumbotron. Bigger, screens within screens…surround sound so…if you'd like to say…cut your teeth on something…you know…get back to doing stuff that doesn't end with us saving the world…well…that's there."

"Fine…" Gru said.

"Um…also…I was wondering if we might be able to get a pair of overalls in a slightly bigger size?" The doctor continued with some trepidation.

"What do we need dis for?" He said while opening the box of instant coffee and untangling the tea bags.

"Well…the size we have doesn't fit Dougie…" Gru paused and eyed the doctor wearily.

"_Dougie_?"

"Oh…sorry…uh the minions…keep calling him that…just sort of…picked it up I guess,"

"Great…fine whatever, beeger over alls." Gru said as he set the bag of coffee in hot water and watched as it began to seep. "And den when you 'ave feenished dat you can see eef anyone else who 'as tried to kill me recently wants a job."

"Still on that girl are you?" Nefario said while nodding at the coffee.

"I 'ave…developed a taste for eet…ees all."

"Yes well…I think it's probably for the best. I think after this whole incident it's clear that women cause nothing but trouble…and young women especially are…are all wet."

Gru came out of his thoughts and gave the doctor a weary look.

"Would you please stop useeng…buh, never mind," he said as he took a drink of the awful coffee.

"If it makes you feel any better, I doubt she left only because of you…I imagine the nearly dying thing factored in a bit."

"Dr. Nefario…"

"Hmm?"

"Ees dere…sometheeng you can be doeeng…somewhere else?"

"Not really. I mean we aren't really working on anything at the moment as I have said and…" he caught Gru's expression and cleared his throat. "I'll just find something shall I?"

After Nefario returned to the lab, Gru headed back into the hall. He paused at the entrance to the living room for a moment, his eyes on one of the many trophies adorning his hall while his mind was elsewhere. He saw something out of the corner of his eye and looked down at the floor near the door. The thing that had caught his eye was a mess of badly ravished canvass that had at one point been a shoe. He set his coffee down on the shelf containing the swords and stooped to pick the remnant up.

It had recently been retrieved from one corner of his lawn. After Kyle had destroyed it, it had sat there on Gru's ill kept grass getting rained on and muddied. Gru turned it over in his hands for a moment before smiling a little in a far off kind of way. This became a set expression. He set the shoe back down, grabbed his jacket and coffee and headed out the door.

XXX

Gru frowned as he stepped outside of his tank and surveyed Ady's apartment building. There was a broken piece of yellow tape lying on the lawn, but otherwise it appeared as if it was still being used. Apparently no one was very concerned about break ins in this area, maybe because they were so common.

Gru headed toward the door to apartment 3. Or, rather he moved to where the door had been. There was a thin sheet of plastic over it now. He frowned and after testing the doorbell only to find that it only made a faint thud when he pressed it, he knocked wearily on the doorframe instead.

There were voices inside and one, a males voice grew louder as he approached the plastic, slightly distorted as one might be behind a shower curtain before he peeled it back.

"You the door guy?" Dillon said as he pushed some greasy hair back from his eyes. Gru scowled.

"No," he said coldly. Behind Dillon two other men were eying the doorway curiously, similar to the young man at least in their apparent aversion to soap. They didn't seem particularly concerned with the fact that the apartment appeared to be missing large chunks of wall. "Ees Ady here?"

"Wha? Oh…right…you're the old guy…she baby-sits for…I remember. Nah, she isn't here. I uh…kicked her out weeks ago," he said the last while casting an amused look at his friends. This was short-lived when Gru grabbed him by the collar and lifted him slightly off the ground. "Hey! What the, put me down you…" He cut off as Gru shoved the barrel of a strange gun against the bottom of his chin. The two guys who had sitting on the couch tripped over themselves trying to get behind something.

"Leesting you greasy leetle punk, I am een no mood for pleasantries. Do you know where she ees, or not?"

"Oh god, please don't shoot me! Look, I don't know! She came home, I mentioned something about the house and her rent and she threatened me with a bat. She made me take off the pants I took from her closet and she took all of her stuff and left. I don't know where she is!"

One of the guys was peaking out from behind the couch.

"I think I saw her around the Hideaway earlier this week." He said, "She was wearing an apron…she might be working there now." When Gru looked over toward him, the guy ducked behind the couch again.

"There! Hideaway! Please let me go!" Gru scowled and after a moment while he decided whether or not to shoot the young man anyways, he let go of him before turning back towards the road. Behind him Dillon desperately pulled the plastic over the doorway again, for whatever good that did.

Gru started to tuck the gun away as he walked down the sidewalk and eyed the beat up car parked at the curb. He recognized it vaguely as the car that Ady had sometimes driven to his house and, more often had been waiting outside at the end of his driveway when she left. Gru cast a brief look at the apartment before removing theh gun again.

Dillon stopped in the process of pulling the wobbly kitchen table in front of the doorway when he heard a loud and fairly alarming sound. He went to the window in time to see his car disintegrate into nothing.

XXX

Ady was leaning on the counter at the Hideaway and occasionally adjusting the straps on an apron that was two sizes too big. She was waiting for a customer to make up his mind. There was a decent sized line forming behind him.

It had been two weeks, two weeks since the ordeal, two weeks of normalcy; blessed, peaceful, non-psychotic, boring normalcy.

She hadn't realized that she'd drifted off until the customer spoke and brought her out of her thoughts. Behind her Vanessa was scrubbing dishes.

"I'm not sure what it is I want," the man said finally while eyeing the menu. "What do you recommend?" Ady sighed.

"It's all pretty much terrible, just pick something," The man frowned.

"Uh…okay…well…just coffee then I guess."

Vanessa left the dishes in order to pour the man a cup of coffee.

"You all right?" She asked Ady after the man walked away, slightly puzzled.

"Huh? Oh yeah just…a little edgy today, I guess."

"Well, try to pull it back a little, you don't want to get fired in the first week." Vanessa said before returning to the sink. Ady nodded as another man approached the counter after spending a moment looking at the menu.

"Which is better, the cheesecake or the apple pie?"

"Well they've both been in boxes in the freezer for the last three weeks so you could probably go either way."

Vanessa wrung her hands off and hurried back to the counter.

"She's kidding, it hasn't been three weeks. Don't tell them that!" She added in a whisper to Ady, who shrugged a little as the man pursed his lips.

"Well…are they…fresh?"

"If you consider frozen cheesecake fresh then yeah, sure." Ady said vaguely.

"Look, Ady…why don't you…go get some muffins from the back or something." Vanessa said while smiling nervously at the customer.

"What? It was kind of a stupid question. I just told him they'd been in the freezer for three weeks." Ady said as Vanessa pushed her towards the door that went into the back room.

"Sorry about that. Uh, I would say the apple pie is probably…" she paused and her expression changed. "_Ohhh crap…"_

"Excuse me?" The man said, but Vanessa was no longer looking at him. She was looking just past his head and past the line towards the door as Gru entered removing his sunglasses as he did. He looked around briefly before his eyes fell on her.

"No…no no…oh no way…this is not happening to me again," she said as she picked up the phone.

"Look miss, that sign, right above your head says you provide excellent service…you think this is excellent service?"

"What? Shut up for a second," she said as she dialed hurriedly.

"All right, that's it, I want to talk to your manager. Hey wait your turn!" he added the last as Gru pushed past the crowd and nudged him out of the way. Vanessa was staring at him in horror with her mouth opened. On the other line the police station picked up.

"Police, what seems to be the problem."

"Uhhh…" Vanessa started as Gru very carefully took the phone from her unresisting hand and casually dropped it.

"Who the hell do you think you are!" The man said. Gru removed a gun from his coat and pointed it at the phone, which was a pile of dust and instant later. The man's anger faded in an instant. "Oh…sorry." He said while backing off nervously.

Gru tucked the gun away again as he turned his attention back on Vanessa who had backed up.

"What…what can I do for you?" She asked in a small voice.

"Does Ady work here?" He asked while leaning on the counter. It took a moment for her to register the question.

"No…" she said eventually. "I don't…I don't know…an Ady." Gru raised his eyebrow.

"Look, I remember you from de other coffee shop. Ees she working here or not?"

"Oh…you…no…I don't know where she is…but…if I did…I would tell her to _stay back there and call the police!" _The last was said as Ady elbowed her way through the door with a tray of muffins. She looked up at Gru and most of them fell on the floor. He straightened and moved around the counter.

"Ady…" he started.

"What are you doing here!" She asked with some frustration as she began picking the fallen muffins off of the floor.

"I need to talk to you."

"I'm working."

"Eet will not take long," he said.

"How did you even…never mind, I don't want to know. Look, you can't be here…"

"Just geeve me five meenuts," he said while holding his hand up. Ady met his gaze before looking towards the customers and Vanessa who was staring at both of them in horror.

"You already pulled a gun out didn't you?" She asked wearily.

"Uhh…"

"Dammit, Gru! All right, but wait outside, you're freaking everyone out," she said. He nodded after a moment before pushing past the line of people again towards the door. Ady sighed. Vanessa unfroze and pulled her cell phone out of her pocket.

"What are you doing?" Ady asked warily.

"What do you think I'm doing, I'm calling the Police," she gave Ady a surprised look when she took the phone from her and shut it. "What…?"

"Trust me on this, it wont do any good," she said as she started towards the door, shoving the tray of muffins at a confused customer who had started to address a question at her.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going out there to talk to him."

"What? Wait! Don't do that…are you insane? Ady! I like my idea better!"

XXX

Gru was sitting at a table on the patio, eyeing the manmade beach quietly. He looked up when Ady approached.

"All right you have five minutes," she said awkwardly.

"Would you…walk weeth me?" He asked while nodding towards the beach against his better judgment. He was wearing his dress pants today and there had been on and off rain for the last week, making the sand somewhat scummy looking.

"Gru I don't…all right," she sighed after meeting his expression. She kicked her shoes off and waited while Gru took off his dress shoes and socks before they stepped onto the beach. They were both quiet for a moment. Gru broke the silence first.

"Eef you were really wanting to geet away from me…you should 'ave gone farther," he said, while casting a brief look at her. "At least across de country."

"Four more minutes…"

"Why deed you change your number?"

"You tried to take over the world Gru."

"Dat ees eet?" She raised her eyebrow.

"That's it? Most people…would kind of consider that…unhealthy behavior."

"Eet ees not as eef I make a habit out ove eet."

"All right then…in the last month, you wrecked my car, lost me my job, there are large holes in my old apartment, I almost blew up on various occasions, I was shot with a poisoned dart, attacked by a dog thing who ate my shoes… and was kidnapped and held captive by _cookie robots_ and that only covers some of the stuff that has happened since I met you."

"Dat…sounds worse when you say eet all together out loud like dat…I do not remember wrecking your car."

"Well, it was either before or after you threatened to disintegrate me for coffee. I know it was you, unless there are two psychos driving around in a tank with a big G on it."

"Dr. Nefario can probably feex eet for you provided you do not mind eef eet…shoots rockets."

"They towed it out of the apartment complex weeks ago…probably thought it was garbage." Ady said with a sigh before stuffing her hands in her pockets.

"Eef…eef I am dat terrible…why deedn't you quit before?"

"I did, remember. Your daughters convinced me to stay. They're really persuasive in a…devious conniving way." He smiled sadly.

"Yes…dey are," he said before looking at her. "Dey…seem to like you…a lot," he added. She met his gaze again and then looked away. "You know, before I met dem…theengs were…really deeferent." They were quiet again. Ady cast a brief look at Gru and curiosity got the better of her.

"All right, I have to ask because I've kind of been wondering since you first trapped me in your house with a high powered electric fence. Why did you…adopt them…out of pure…morbid curiosity?" Gru folded his hands behind his back with some discomfiture.

"I do not theenk dat telling you dat would improve your impression ove me."

"It's not that high Gru," he sighed and looked down at the sand.

"Right, well…eef I tell you…will you please… try not to hort me or keel me or something."

"This should be interesting," she said as she crossed her arms.

"Uh…I needed dis…shrink ray so dat I could…fly up to de moon and shrink eet and hold eet ransom…but eet was een dis lair and I could not get een…"

"The moon?" Ady interrupted with some weariness. "That was you? You…seriously stole the moon…"

"For a leetle bit…dere was some minor…issues I deed not forsee," he cleared his throat. "Uh so…aftor I found out dat dis…guy who had de ray…bought cookies from de gurls…I adopted dem so dat when dey delivered dem…I would 'ave access to…his house."

"That explains the exploding cookie things," she said under her breath. "You adopted them…to use them to steal the moon…?"

"To steal de shrink ray…to shrink de moon…and den to steal eet…dat ees…yes,"

"And then…what? Send them back to the orphanage?" She said, stopping on the beach and looking troubled as well as perhaps a little disheartened.

"Uh…actually…" Gru said, looking wretched. "De forst plan was to…leave dem at…an amusement park." He tried not to look at her and instead kept his gaze on the ground.

"Okay, I was wrong…my opinion of you can go lower…did they know about this?"

"_No,_" he said sternly. "_Dey do not know about dis_," something in his voice made her pause.

"You don't think…they're going to ask? I mean…Margo's pretty bright Gru…"

"I know," he said. Ady looked at him for a moment and then looked away. "My life was…a lot easier before I met dem," he said finally. Ady stared at the shore for a moment with a frown.

"But eet ees better now," he added before folding his hands behind his back and absently playing with his shoes and socks. I do not want dem to be unhappy because ove me." He said now speaking with some strain. "Would you…agree to come back and baby-sit sometimes…eef I promise to leave you alone?"

"I don't…I don't think. Its not just…that Gru…look I can't…" she paused and turned when she heard the start of sirens, watching warily as a few police cars pulled up in front of The Hideaway. "Vanessa…I told her not to call the cops…I can stall them long enough for you to get away I guess but…" Gru grabbed her arm as she started towards the café. He was giving her a slightly bewildered look.

"Gru, let go."

"Dees ees not about me tryeeng to take over de world…" he said after a moment.

"Now's really not the best time for…" she started as she grabbed his hand.

"De police do not concern me." He said as he put his other hand on top of hers. "What are you so afraid ove?" Ady met his gaze for a moment before increasing the grip on his hand and gently prying it from her arm.

"I'm _not_ afraid," she said firmly.

"_This is the police. Drop whatever weapons you may be carrying and step away from the girl. This is your only warning." _A voice carried over the beach as a Police officer talked through a megaphone. Gru sighed.

"Great…well they noticed you…"

"Look, believe me I know what eet ees like to be completely out ove your element…"

"Seriously, they're going to shoot at you…"

"Here move out ove de way." He said as he pulled her back.

"Why?" She asked suspiciously. She opened her mouth slightly as he pulled one of the guns out of his jacket and pointed it at the parking lot.

"_I repeat, drop your weapons and step away…" _After setting the target Gru pulled the trigger and a moment later the speaking police officer was staring, horror stricken as pieces of concrete fell around him. He looked down at the large hole that had appeared in the parking lot a few feet away.

"What…is wrong with you?" Ady asked. He ignored the question.

"Half ove de stuff you mentioned, I deed before Polina kidnapped you. You deed not run away den."

"I didn't run away…this isn't running away. Normal people don't like the prospect of being blown up, Gru."

"But you nearly blew up at my house plenty ove times."

"Do you really think that is a good argument for you to be making?"

"My point ees, you were not afraid ove me before, why ees eet different now?"

"I'm…not afraid of you, Gru…Look, that…that was at least five minutes," she said before turning back to the hideaway. Gru started to say something and then closed his mouth and watched her as she headed back up the beach before sighing and putting the gun away. He stood alone on the wretched sand for a moment before eyeing the police cars bitterly and heading in the opposite direction.

XXX

When the girls returned later that afternoon Gru was sitting on the couch drinking a glass of wine. He had his sleeves rolled up and the bottom of his pants and feet were still covered in wet sand.

"Hey dad." Margo said.

"Hello Margo, how was dance class?"

"It was all right…Um, why are your pants all dirty?" Margo asked as she put her and her sisters bags down. She noticed her father was looking both tired and sad.

"Eet ees not important."

"Daddy, look, I learned a new dance position, you wanna see?" Agnes asked. She got into a dance pose with some apparent effort.

"Dat ees very good Agnes." He said after she stumbled a little and nearly fell over. She gave him a sunny smile and tried to do it again. "All right, all right…do not hort yourself."

"I'm going to go get my crayons so we can color," she said happily before running off.

"I am on de pins and needles, where ees my mother?" He added to Margo cautiously as Edith jumped up onto the couch on the other side of him.

"She said she had a late tai chi class, so she just dropped us off." Gru tried not to look overly relieved. Agnes returned a few minutes later towing her coloring books, crayons and giant unicorn…this ensured that the tiny girl was thoroughly weighted down.

She set a battered coloring book covered in Unicorns down by Gru's feet. It was about 2/3 colored and it was clear which pages had been done by Agnes and which she'd had help with.

"This books my favorite. Here we can color this picture."

"Why don't you color eet and I will watch."

"No…you have to help." She said while pulling on his pant leg and giving him a wide-eyed look.

"Okay," he said tiredly as he lowered himself onto the floor, setting his wine glass aside. Agnes handed him a pink crayon.

"You can be in charge of this color." He raised his eyebrow and looked sideways at Margo as she sat down on the floor next to him.

For the most part coloring consisted of Agnes pointing out spots that Gru could shade pink before filling the rest up with blue marker. At some point she crawled into his lap and lightly batted at his hand whenever she felt he wasn't coloring the picture right.

When they were finished and after Agnes had ripped the picture out of the book and had given it to him, Gru made macaroni and cheese using some giant shells he'd purchased after the last macaroni incident. The macaroni seemed to go over well except that Agnes kept getting cheese everywhere because the shells were too large for her and Edith kept gathering cheese in her noodle shells and squirting it at Margo.

"Can we color more after dinner?" Agnes asked as Gru wiped the cheese out of her hair for the second time in the last fifteen minutes.

"_No more coloring_." Edith said from across the table.

"Let your seestors peeck sometheeng for aftor dinner Agnes." He said.

"Finally," Edith said as she slid down off her seat and crawled out from under the table.

"Hey, where are you goeeng? Feenish your dinner forst." Edith said something that was lost as she went through the kitchen door. "You deed not even eat most ove eet, most ove eet ees on your seestor." He called after her. Gru sighed and cast a look at Margo who was scraping cheese off of her glasses and occasionally looking annoyed when they started beeping.

"Here." He said as he motioned for her to hand them over. After ensuring that Margo's glasses were cheeseless he gathered up the plates to do the dishes. Edith wondered back into the kitchen with the water bottle filled with fake blood and got Gru's attention by squirting him in the chest with it.

"Agh! Edith!" He said while setting a dish in the sink and examining his turtleneck. "Dees stuff ees probably staining de fibers ove my shirt. Where deed you even find dat? I heed eet up high so dat you could not reach." He said. She shrugged. "Geeve eet here."

"Aw, come on. Agnes got to pick something." Gru sighed.

"Fine, all right, but we will play outside, so dat dat stuff does not geet all over de house."

"Cool, you can be the victim." Edith said as she headed out of the kitchen.

XXX

Ady slumped down in one of the booths and started going over the table with a wet rag. Vanessa meanwhile was running a mop over the floor. She looked up.

"Looks like the cops are heading out. Half of the parking lot is gone," she added with a sigh.

"I told you not to call," Ady said.

"I just hope they don't close the place down…what did you say to that guy? I mean…why was he looking for you?"

"Nothing…it doesn't matter." She was quiet for a while before sitting back and setting the rag aside. "Vanessa, what are you afraid of?"

"What?"

"Like…really really afraid of…not counting, you know…crazy men with guns." Vanessa paused for a moment.

"Snakes…and earwigs, those things really creep me out."

"That's not really…what I meant. I mean…is there something that…you sort of worry about all the time?"

"And we're not counting guys with guns? Because it seems like that's been happening a lot lately. I don't know…sometimes I worry that I'm going to be 30 and still working in a place like this. Oh…I mean, not that that would be a bad thing…"

"It's all right…"

"Why are you asking?"

"Sometimes I think that…well look, hypothetical question. Let's say you make a decision and…most people would consider it perfectly sane and probably for the best. Do you think a good decision can be a bad decision if you're making it for the wrong reasons?"

"What kind of decision?"

"All right, well let's say that you want to …drink lots and lots of alcohol…something I am definitely considering doing after I get off of work…then you decide not to but it's not because it's unhealthy, it's because…I dunno, the buildings full of snakes."

"Uhh…I don't think it's unreasonable to not want to drink in a bar with snakes."

"Good point." Ady said as she leaned on the table and eyed the surface sadly.

"Sounds like a major safety issue to me…" Vanessa said as she returned to her mopping.

"Yeah, I didn't really think that analogy through very well." Ady said as she ran her hand over her head.

"I've always been kind of afraid that I'd wind up like my mom or dad," she said after a moment.

"Well…I think that's probably normal. My mom drives me crazy."

"I don't mean like that. My mom always relied on other people…mostly her boyfriends…and I always felt like…an unfortunate detail in her life…and my dad, he couldn't even wait around long enough for me to _become_ an unfortunate detail in his." For a moment she stared at her hands before frowning.

"I'm not really following, Ady…" Vanessa said as Ady stood up.

"Are we done for the night?"

"Uhh, yeah, pretty much…why?"

"Just head back to the apartment without me…I'll catch a cab back later," she said as she headed towards the door.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to a bar filled with snakes." Ady said.

"Wait, What?"

"I'm going to go ruin my life, I think." Ady called back.

XXX

"All right, eet ees geeting dark." Gru said. "Time to go een."

"Aw, but there's still some left." Edith said while shaking the water bottle a little.

"Yes, but I am covered een de blood. I'm dead, well done. Eet ees time to geet ready for bed. Come on gurls," he added to Margo and Agnes who had gotten tired of the game long before Edith did and were catching fireflies. Margo took Agnes' hand and they headed towards the house.

"Do we have to go to bed?" Edith said.

"Well, I need to take a shower. You can stay up until I am feenished. But go put on your pjs." He took the water bottle from Edith as she went inside and set it aside as he sat down on the steps leading up to the door, vaguely trying to wipe the fake blood off of his feet before he went in. Gru made a sound of disgust as he sat up and eyed the moon, which was currently showing a crescent. He sighed heavily.

Gru turned his head as Margo headed back down the steps so that she was standing next to him.

"You know that stuff is in your ears." She said with a hint of amusement.

"Yes, your seestor was very enthusiastic. Eet ees a good theeng eet ees almost gone."

"She knows how to make more." Gru groaned a little.

"Well, tomorrow you can peeck sometheeng to do." He said while trying to roll up his sleeves and wincing as they stuck to his arms.

"Hey dad."

"Hmm?" She wrapped her arms around his neck.

"It's not your fault she left." Gru paused for a moment before returning her hug.

"You are a bad liar," he said softly. "I love you, Margo."

"I love you too." She said, her voice slightly muffled by his shoulder. "Um…you're really sticky, dad." She added after a moment. He chuckled.

"Yes, I know. Here, go change your clothes." He said as he let go. Margo smiled at him and headed back up the stairs. Gru sat for a moment longer before sighing and heading in as well.

XXX

"Hey Margo." Edith said, getting the older girls attention. She was brushing Agnes' hair on the living room floor.

"Yeah?" Edith had been climbing on top of the couch, despite Margo's insistence that she stop. She settled onto one of the cushions now.

"Why do you think it's so easy to leave us?"

"What?" Margo said, pausing in the act of brushing.

"My mom left and dad gave us up for a little bit…and Ady. How come?"

"I don't know." Margo said uncomfortably. Her sister had picked up on thoughts that she had had on numerous occasions, at night, staring at the ceiling of the orphanage, or even occasionally at their new home. "I don't think we did anything," she said as she finished brushing Agnes' hair and tied it up. "Besides, dad's not going to leave us again."

"Yeah." Edith said before pulling her hat down over her eyes.

She had just started to brush her own hair when there was a quiet knock on the door. She stood up and moving cautiously over to the door.

"Maybe it's grandma." Agnes said carefully.

"Or a tongueless guy," Edith said as she raised a side of her hat.

"Either way…I'm not sure dad would want us to answer it." Margo said. There was another knock, this time a tad bit louder…although if it had been their grandma or one of Polina's henchmen the second knock probably would have rattled the hinges. She looked around until she found a chair and pushed it up to the door so she could climb up and look out of the peephole.

"It's Ady." Margo said as she exchanged a look with her sisters before jumping down off the chair and pulling the door open. Ady had her hands in her pockets and her shoulders bunched up in a way that made her look slightly tense.

"Hey guys," she said nervously.

"Hey," Margo responded.

"Uhh, can I come in?" Margo nodded and stepped away from the door, shutting it behind her after Ady was inside.

"So how are you guys doing?" Ady said after a moment.

"Um…were okay…" Margo started. Edith interrupted her.

"Why did you leave?" She said while crossing her arms.

"Yeah, don't you like us anymore?" Agnes asked.

Margo cast her younger sisters a brief look before turning back towards Ady and raising her eyebrows in query.

"It's only been two weeks…" Ady said weakly.

"Yeah but…you changed your number…we thought you weren't coming back." Margo said.

"I…its not that I don't like you." Ady said uncomfortably. "I do…it's just…well, you know how kids are afraid of things that like…make sense?"

"Like monsters?" Agnes said.

"Yeah…that's…"

"And spiders…"

"Well yes…"

"And squishy things?"

"Well that one…yeah okay…those are good examples Agnes…those things. Well adults tend to be afraid of really stupid stuff."

"Like blowing up?" Edith said.

"Well no…that's…a legitimate fear…particularly considering your father but…" She sighed and crouched down. "Look if I apologize and promise not to do it again will you guys forgive me?" She asked, while appearing anxious and hopeful. Margo, Edith and Agnes exchanged a look. Agnes extended her pinky.

"Pinky promise?" Ady eyed it for a moment before she smiled a little and wrapped her pinky around Agnes's.

"Yeah, I promise," Ady said. Before she could stand, Edith surprised her by hugging her shoulders. "I missed you guys," Ady said after a moment as she returned the girls hug.

When she straightened Agnes pulled on her pant leg.

"Wanna come play with us until we gotta go to bed?"

"Yeah okay." Ady said as Agnes grabbed her hand and started pulling her towards the living room. "Um…where uh…where's your dad?" She asked after a moment, sounding nervous again.

"He had to wash all of the blood off." Edith said.

"What?"

"Edith was playing with that fake blood you helped us make…dad got covered in it. He's in the shower." Margo said.

"Ah."

XXX

After Gru got out of the shower he changed into his silk pjs, buttoning up the silk top overtop a plain white cotton shirt as he headed down the spiral stairs.

"All right gurls, eet ees time for…" He stopped when he got to the doorway and saw Ady.

"Hey Gru." Ady said, a hint timidly. She had been in the process of brushing and braiding Margo's hair while Agnes used her head and shoulders as hills in a magical forest for her unicorn. Edith had found an ancient set of manacles with her father's trophies and was attempting to clamp Ady's ankles despite the woman's protests.

"Hello," he said weakly.

"Er, do you have a key for these?" She said after a moment, mainly to break the silence, while raising her shackled feet slightly. Gru was brought out of his slight bemusement as he eyed the manacles.

"No, actually…dose were…just for show." Ady cast Edith a weary look.

"Oops." Edith said innocently.

Gru went over to the coat wrack where his jacket was hanging and searched through the pockets briefly before pulling out a set of lock picks, which he unraveled as he crossed the living room and kneeled by Ady.

"What are you doeeng here?" He asked as he tested the handcuffs to see if they might slip off before selecting one of the tools and working at the lock.

"Well, we closed early considering you blew most of the parking lot up, so I decided to stop by…to see the girls…also kind of wanted to talk to you. You have a whole lab full of dangerous things and you're going at these with a lock pick?"

"Dese are genuine bean handcuffs from de 1800s. I do not want to damage dem. Dey do not tighten all de way, so dey can normally be slipped off, but apparently not over _your_ feet."

"I can still kick Gru." He caught her gaze before returning to the lock.

"Dere." He said after a few moments, when the handcuffs came loose. "I should probably put dese up somewhere," he added while casting a look at Edith.

"You're going to read to us, right daddy?" Agnes asked as she hopped off of the couch, next to Ady who was massaging her ankles. He nodded.

"You wanna come upstairs and liste to the story with us?" She asked while tugging on Ady's sleeve."

"Uh, I don't think so, Agnes," she said while casting a brief look at Gru, who was watching her.

"Aw come on." Edith said as she stood and nudged Ady's leg with her foot.

"Please." Agnes said, her eyes wide in that about to burst way that she had mastered so entirely.

"Okay, fine, stop looking at me like that." Ady said as Agnes grabbed her hand, trying to pull her off the floor and only managing to fall over in the process.

XXX

Ady was pulled down onto a seat of pillows in the girls' bedroom. Agnes immediately scrambled onto her lap with a unicorn toy.

"All right, which book?" Gru said. He already knew the answer but he was still holding out hope that they would want a different book tonight. Edith pulled his book off of the shelf and handed it to him. He sighed. Margo caught his eye and smiled before sitting down on the floor next to Ady. Gru pulled a chair over and hiked his pajama pants up slightly as he sat.

"Do the horn dad." Margo said amusedly. He cast her a brief look before opening the book and bringing it to his face, casting a brief weary look at Ady who turned the start of laughter into an unconvincing cough. He lowered the book and started into it. Edith leaning over her bed so that she was half leaning on Ady's shoulder.

"The pink kitten is me." She said in a whisper.

"Oh?" Ady said, pokerfaced. "That would explain why it's wearing your hat." She met Gru's nervous gaze a couple of times when he looked up from the book.

When he finished Agnes crawled off of her lap, dragging her unicorn with her and attempted to climb up into her bed. Ady gave her a nudge after a moment of the girl's struggles accompanied with her little panting noises.

"Night Ady." Margo said.

"Goodnight Margo." Ady said as she stood, eyeing Gru as he set the book back on the shelf.

"When are you going to come over again?" The older girl added, with perhaps a bit of trepidation. Pinky promises might have worked for her sisters but Margo was slightly less trusting.

"I dunno, but I'll leave my new phone number with your dad, okay?" Margo smiled and hugged the older woman around her midsection.

"Thanks for coming back," Ady returned her hug.

"No problem…it was really boring without you guys." She said. Margo broke away shyly before crawling up into her own bed.

"I'll just…be out here." She said to Gru before running her hand through her hair nervously and heading towards the door.

Gru ensured that his daughters were situated properly in their beds, and had brushed their teeth and in Edith's case made her take her boots off before he turned off all of the lights and kissed them goodnight.

"Good luck dad." Margo said with a shrewd smile as he rose from her bed.

XXX

Ady was leaning against the wall as he surfaced from the room, closing the door carefully.

"I enjoyed seeing you depicted as a unicorn." She said as she straightened. "The scarf was a nice touch." He gave her a dry look before nodding towards the stairs. She stuffed her hands in her pockets and followed him. Gru, slightly nervous, attempted to do the same. He forgot that he was wearing pj pants, so it turned into a slightly awkward spastic action before he settled for folding his hands behind his back.

"Where did you learn to do that anyways?" She asked.

"Hmm?"

"You don't seem like the arts and crafts type."

"Eet ees something…I picked up I guess." She was quiet for a moment.

"So, I was thinking and…I guess you were right. Not about the whole exploding thing…and I'm still kind of pissed about the parking lot and…you know…all of that other stuff but…if the offer still stands I'd…like to come back and baby-sit…sometimes."

"I cannot pay you as much." Gru said carefully.

"I didn't actually…mean for money, Gru." Ady said. "Anyways, I'm kind of hoping to keep my job at The Hideaway…although I guess we'll see how well business does after today…it might be all right as long as the psycho doesn't come back," she said while giving Gru a cynical smile. He returned it apprehensively.

"Well, dey do need someone to take dem to ballet now dat I am not allowed…and I would prefer eet not be my mother."

"Okay, deal," she said as she extended her hand. He took it and for a moment met her gaze.

"Deal," he said as she withdrew her hand, coloring slightly.

"Are you hungry?" Gru asked after a moment of tense silence.

"Uhh…a little, I haven't really eaten yet."

"De gurls had deener but I am not particularly fond ove de macaroni and cheese. I was…goeeng to make sometheeng else for myself…eef you would…like sometheeng to eat?"

"All right." Ady said. He nodded and headed down the stairs. Ady followed him into the kitchen as he pulled his apron out of the pantry and put it on over his pjs. "I opened up a bottle ove wine earlier…eef you would like a glass," he said while opening the fridge and taking it out of the shelf inside the door. "Eet should not be allowed to seet for to much longer or eet will lose de flavor."

He poured a glass and offered it to her. Ady took it after a moment. Gru turned back to the fridge.

While he looked Ady took a sip of the wine and lingered nearby. She picked up the box of instant coffee he'd set aside earlier that morning and examined it before setting it down again and smiling a little.

"Is dere anytheeng een particularly you are hungry for?" Gru said, without looking at her. He started slightly when she touched his arm.

"How about grilled cheese?" She said as he turned towards her. Before he could answer Ady had lightly placed her hands on the sides of his face and pulled him towards her. There was an awkward moment while she tried judge the amount of neck craning she'd have to do to avoid his nose, but this did not spoil the kiss. It lasted longer then the first. When she broke away she looked slightly embarrassed.

"Uhh…all right…grilled cheese." Gru said weakly. Ady smiled a little. "And fine wine…dat sounds a little…" she raised her eyebrow and pulled at the straps of his apron pulling him close to her again and cutting him off.

XXX

Police and Special Forces had tried to get into Polina's estate, but had not been able to get past the front door. Those who had not been burned, disintegrated or electrocuted by the security system had gotten eaten by the plants. Eventually they gave up and blocked it off with tape and warning signs. Despite this someone was able to get into the house and after careful navigation through its interior came to the large glass chasm. Here the systems were down so the doors were easy enough to get through.

There were small fires everywhere. Nefario had found it easier to destroy the mass atomizer rather then take it apart piece by piece. It was a hulking mess of melted metal. The henchmen had also destroyed their fair share of stuff. Glass didn't burn, so for the most part the stuff that could burn had burned down to the glass floor and then just kind of went out by themselves.

Perkins eyed the facility wearily, before kicking aside a piece of shrapnel and heading inside.

Eventually he found himself in a small storage room on one of the connecting halls into Polina's fortress. It was untouched. It was also occupied. There was a man tied to one of the chairs. When he saw Perkins he started making indeterminate noises through the gag over his mouth. After a moment of regarding the man pitilessly, he reached forward and pulled the tie down.

"Thank god. The henchmen have gone nuts. They did something to Polina. They've had me tied up in here for a week," Henrick said. "Untie me."

"Who did this?" Perkins asked, rather then untying the man he searched briefly over the paper work littering the desk.

"That damn…villain Polina was working with. Gru. I was going to get a lot of money out of this! He ruined everything!"

Perkins had found what he was looking for in one of the drawers after eyeing, with interest a great many leases for various property and organizations.

"This woman certainly had a lot of ambition." Perkins said, with perhaps a bit of admiration.

"Right well, she had a knack for…you know finding people with power. She said the trepanning process makes them forget but I think she may have been slightly mistaken. Will you please untie me? My arms fell asleep hours ago."

"You talk too much." Perkins said before pulling Henrick's gag back over his mouth. He held up the papers that had allowed Polina to take over the majority of the bank of evil and ripped them cleanly in half and headed back out the door, ignoring the man's avid protests.

A couple of henchman spotted him on his way out, and he waved the ripped pieces of paper vaguely.

"Just taking care of some business gentlemen. Carry on." They didn't particularly have the intelligence to contest this so they let him go.

When he left the estate there was a car waiting for him. He slipped into the drivers seat and looked sideways at the youth sitting in the passenger seat.

"Did you get your papers back?" The young man said without interest as he focused on a strange weapon that he was making tweaks on with his tongue slightly stuck out.

"What is that, Viktor?" Perkins asked with some weariness.

"It's a jellyfish ray. It shoots box jellyfish up to 80 miles per hour, and it's Vector, dad, hey!" Perkins plucked the weapon out of his hands with annoyance and threw it in the back seat. Vector undid his seat belt and attempted to get the gun back.

"Well it looks like that woman's been taken care of anyways." Perkins said as he started the car and stepped on the gas, causing his son to stumble into the back seat. "But I think it's time we did something about Gru."

XXX

Well, that's the end, for now anyways. This chapter turned out longer then I expected it to be. It didn't help that I finally got a hold of Portal 2 recently. At time of writing I've finished it twice. That game is fecking awesome. Anyways, it'll take me a few weeks to get everything sorted out for the sequel, but it shouldn't be too long before I post the first chapter. I don't have a set title yet, still deciding between a few so just keep an eye out.

Review Responses:

Past the Point of no Return: Omigod, breath! The chapters up! I'm glad you liked the story and I hope that this chapter did not disappoint. Thank you for the review. ^^

Phan4Life: Aw, thank you. I am very glad that you are enjoying it. Thank you for the review.

Roolsilver: Ehehe, yay for flailings. Thank for the review. Hope the chapter was worth the wait.

Liloapril: Thank you ^^ Yeah, if I had written it the way I originally intended it would have been broken up and the chapter before the climax was going to end at a horrible horrible cliffhanger…basically the moment when everything went wrong. I'm glad you enjoyed the story. I hope this chapter did not disappoint. Thanks for the review. :)

If I missed anyone I'm very sorry. Thank you guys so much for reading. It has been extremely fun. Until next time. ^^


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